Monday Faker's 1998 Christmas fake. This time, the new Jack Frost movie is the target of his offbeat satire. Somebody put a tremendous amount of effort into this parody ... "Starr Wars" Where Clinton SHOULD have directed those bombs. Everything old is new again. During the darkest days of Watergate, Nixon put the US military on alert! Clinton is such a wimp. Nixon knew what to do with special prosecutors ... he just fired 'em! If Nixon were President in these more cynical times, he would have asked Congress for a full war declaration, and then would have had the FBI "accidentally" kill Starr while he tried to escape his treason arrest, on the pretext that Starr was working for Iraq. And you older guys know that I'm not joking. Nixon, now THERE was a real man. None of this wussy "I'm sorry, but not sorry enough" crap. Gosh, they don't make politicians like that any more. I miss those guys. A pretty cool animated .gif featuring Clinton, his sax and Newt Bill Clinton pays a visit to the Three Bears' house PAL PAL has been a regular Fun House contributor for a long time now, and I think we get them exclusively. I really enjoy his work. He tries to keep the colors especially vivid, and he always tries to find material not commonly found on the web. I think you'll agree that he does a great job. Here's Veronica Cartwright in "Valentino Returns" Vicky Jeffry in "Naked Cell" Myriam Cyr in "Gothic" Joanna Pacula in "The Kiss" Jennifer Miller in "Hit the Dutchman" Daniela Silverio in "Identificazione de una donna" Christine Boisson in "Identificazione de una donna" Corny Corny's work just stared appearing here in the last couple of days. He does plenty of lovely mainstream collages and movie vidcaps, but the ones that caught my eye recently were these more unusual ones, sporting events and TV shows. Check out Beatrice Manowski on TV, and in the streets. (She was a regular on "Und tschuess", a German comedy series.) Corny is yet another top-notch producer from that #german-celebs channel on the Undernet! Sandra Nasic performing in a t-shirt, no bra. She's the lead singer for Guano Apes, a hip German rock group aspiring to international stardom Guano Apes home page. Auf deutsch, natuerlich. Mary Pierce tennis action Steffi Graf tennis action. Kind of an embarrassing close-up of Steffi's buns ... well, of ONE of her buns Crow Speaking of specialty material, here's the ol' master, Crow. Rasslin' matches, talk shows, obscure videos, you name it. Start it off with some rasslin. Here's Chastity's last appearance in the raunchy ECW, before moseying over to the conservative Turner League (WCW). Here's some stuff from "COPS" that couldn't be shown on TV more out-takes from "Cops" and here's Elizabath Sladen in an episode of "Dr. Who" Red Wing The Portuguese-language guy is back. Here's Red Wing's cap of Claudia Ohana in "Luiza Homem" Claudia Ohana in "Luiza Homem" Claudia Ohana in "Luiza Homem" Jamie Lee in "Mother's Boys". The nipple is really hers, but the standing nude is a body double, if I recall correctly. Red Wing is off his usual path here. If memory serves, Jamie Lee doesn't actually speak Portuguese, although she has watched a couple of Carmen Miranda movies. Uncle Scoopy's House of Obscurity, Wax, and Pancakes As I typed that heading, I was reminded of Count Floyd presenting John Candy in "Dr. Tongue's House of Cats". Those early years of SCTV were primitive, but hilarious. OK, on to the REALLY obscure. Here's Jenny Agutter in a movie called "China 9, Liberty 37" At least I know who she is, if not the movie. As you get further down this section, I don't even know who they are. Agutter again in "Sweet William" Paula Anne Bland in "The Fruit Machine". This is a real movie "two gay teens go on the lam after witnessing a murder", and she's a real person. Katherina Boehm in "Gigolo" more of Katherina Boehm in "Gigolo" Tua Fock. 1) She's a blond Boss model 2) Her name in Latin means ... well, I think you can complete the joke More of Fock, Tua. Speaking of archery, here's Blaze Starr in the immortal screen classic, "Blaze Starr Goes Nudist". It's getting harder and harder to pick my favorite movie. This? Barn of the Naked Dead? Zapped? Spice World? So many greats to choose from. Margaret Helgenberger in "Conundrum" Angel Tompkins in Sex-cess Leilani Bishop from the new Vanity Fair Tara-Spencer Nairn in "The Outer Limits" Jane Bradbury Paloma Picasso in "Immoral Tales" (my favorite director, Walerian Borowczyk) Single Vidcap Grab Bag from MGM Raw vidcap grab-bag of 640x480 caps. No collages, no editing. The side of Bonnie Bedelia's breast The side of Jessica Lange's breast Clear shot of Demi Moore's buns Erika Eleniak's chest side view of Jamie Luner topless one Joan Severance breast strange camera angle (from below) of a topless Shauna O'Brien Tracy Savage in the shower Sunday's Stuff This is a real rarity. Dyan Cannon only did one genuine topless scene, in an obscure 1970's movie called "Child Under a Leaf". I think this movie has never been released on video, but Krypton has it on tape, and shared it with us. Dyan Cannon also may have done a frontal nude scene, but she was in Hollywood and the camera was in Karachi. Can't tell if it's a nude. Can't tell if it's her. Can't even tell for sure if it is a woman. This is old hat for you experts, but just so you newbies don't write me about this, this is the phony-baloney Dyan Cannon nude from "Such Good Friends". Oh, it's a real scene from the movie. Only problem is that the director, Otto Preminger, (a legendary slimebag .... think of George Steinbrenner making movies) faked it. Dyan and the White Shadow are supposed to be looking at a picture of her nude. She wouldn't get naked just for the silly prop picture, so Preminger had his artists take a picture of Cannon and fake a nude. If you'll look closely, you'll see that they did a crappy job (her nipples are not properly located on her breasts).By the way, White Shadow (Ken Howard) is still very active and is said to have a major role in "At First Sight", joining a cast that includes Mira Sorvino, Nathan Lane, and Val Kilmer. Here's the dope on "At First Sight". A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, long before Sea Quest, Stephanie Beacham did a nude scene with Marlon Brando in "The Nightcomers" (a prequel, if you can believe it, to "Turn of the Screw". Boy, that must be some lighthearted fare). She was 25 at the time,(1972). Tara Fitzgerald in "Frenchman's Creek". Wow. I didn't even know this thing was out of production yet. Filmed in Cornwall. Helluva place to go Skinny dipping Here, back by request, is that Ken Starr Grinch thing. Natalia Estrada One visitor from Spain wrote in to say that if Mathilda May has the world's best natural breasts, Natalia Estrada can't be far behind. I agree. I've always been a fan of hers although she has never really reached international prominence, and is unknown in the USA. With her dark cocoa complexion, her perfect chest, and her exotic face, she is one of the world's great beauties. To make his point, the reader sent in some small but attractive poses. Estrada #1 Estrada #2 Estrada #3 Estrada #4 Estrada #5 Estrada #6 The Holiday Fun House Lady Some of you wrote in to say you missed some of the pictures of Tracy Kelly (the Fun House Christmas Symbol), and/or wanted to see more. Tracy is an aspiring model, and all photos were taken and digitized by Cave. Tracy Kelly #1 Tracy Kelly #2 Tracy Kelly #3 Tracy Kelly #4 Tracy Kelly #5 Sonia Braga when it comes to quantitative celebrity nudity, few celebrities have been nude more than Sonia Braga. I kidded Red Wings last week because he had six collages of naked women in Portuguese-language films, and nary a look at Braga, thereby defying the laws of probability, and showing that, given an approximately equal likelihood, OJ might have been innocent after all. Anyway, the entire concept of math is now restored to sanity with these three Red Wing scans, which ALL include Braga. They are from "Dona Flor and her Two Husbands" Sonia Braga in "Dona Flor and her Two Husbands" #2 Sonia Braga in "Dona Flor and her Two Husbands" #3 Movie madness Charlotte Lewis in "The Glass Cage" Rosanna Arquette in "Nowhere to Run" Katrin Buhrig in "A Guy Won't Fall From the Sky" Diana Barton in "Sexual Malice" one more of Diana Barton in "Sexual Malice" Bess Meyer in "One More saturday Night" Catherine Zeta-Jones, from "Splitting Heirs" (no nudity) Ann Dusenberry in "Basic Training" Ann Dusenberry in "National Lampoon Goes to the Movies" Eva Grimaldi in "Forever" more of Eva Grimaldi in "Forever" Olivia Brunaux in "Vent de Panique" Caroline Cellier in "Vent de Panique". She was chasing the Sally Kirkland Trophy for the oldest woman to do a topless scene. Cellier was only 93 at the time. Kirkland is 108. (OK, Cellier was really only 42, and she looked good. Her face showed her age, but her body looked very young, indeed.) Nicolette Krebitz in "Schicksalsspiel". Camilla Renschke in "Tatort" Faye Grant in "V: The Final Battle". No nudity, but excellent imagery and presentation by Mysterio. Antje Schmidt in "Koma - Lebendig begraben" Jada Pinkett's character in "Jason's Lyric". She says body double. Looks like some of the frames must be Pinkett, but who knows? Charlotte Gainsbourg in "The Cement Garden". This must hold some kind of record, if you could word it right. Something like: "The love scene where the two lovers are most indistinguishable" I think the boy is the one with the longer hair and prettier face. Gainsbourg has a larger chest, but not by much. Anya Kling in "Hagedorn's Daughter". Very nice caps from Corny. We'll have a Corny gallery tomorrow with some great sporting event and talk show appearances. Kelly Lynch in "Persons Unknown" Lori Jo Hendrix in "Prison Heat" Barbie Benton in "Deathstalker" Julie Newmar in the never-released "Monsieur LeCoq" Connie Stevens in "Scorchy" Sherry Jackson (the older daughter on "Make Room for Daddy") with Craig Stevens in "Gunn", the Peter Gunn movie. What a movie! Picture this team. Stevens was already 50 at the time, William Peter Blatty (author of The Exorcist) wrote the script and Blake Edwards directed. Oh, the depth! Carol Wayne, the Tea Time Movie Lady, had a bit part in the movie. Sally Struthers in "Five Easy Pieces" Sheree North with Burt Lancaster in "Lawman" Roberta Leighton with Bill Murray in "Stripes" Saturday's Stuff From RDO Today RDO spends a little time with one of the most important sequels ever made..."Porky's Revenge"! Well, perhaps it wasn't all that important, but it was still as sequel. From the third installment of the "Porky's" movies, here's former bunny babe, Kim Evenson. Kim Evenson #2. I wish my graduation had been this lively. The most exciting highlight from my high school graduation was when I heckled the Valedictorian for using poor grammar. Wendy Feign, from "Porky's Revenge". An odd factoid for you...the only two movies in her filmography are this one, and 1998's "The Proposition". Why was she out of the game for 13 years? My guess...she either did time, joined the Peace Corps, or doing a "Porky's" movie is just really bad on a resume! Kimberly Kirwan in "Porky's Revenge" by RDO. Finally, here's Rose McVeigh. Judie Aronson Anyone know her? I sure don't, but I recognize a fine filmography when I see one. First, here are 'caps of Judie in "Friday the 13th part IV, the Final Chapter". Judis Aronson also from "Friday the 13th part IV, the Final Chapter". Next up, here's Judie in a love scene from "Cool Blue". Another love scene, another B-movie. This time at the plate, 'caps from "The Sleeping Car". From Master Bagger Nothing we haven't seen before in the Fun House, but what the heck it's DVD. Here are 2 collages, and 4 still frame 'caps of Holly Hunter in the Piano. Holly Hunter in "The Piano", by Master Bagger #2. Holly Hunter in "The Piano", by Master Bagger #3. Holly Hunter in "The Piano", by Master Bagger #4. Holly Hunter in "The Piano", by Master Bagger #5. Holly Hunter in "The Piano", by Master Bagger #6. Fun House Variety From Graphic Response, here are two collages of Greta Scacchi. This first collage features Greta in "Shattered". Greta Scacchi by Graphic Response #2, this time from the movie "White Mischief". New on video, here's Embeth Davidtz in "The Gingerbread Man". Vidcaps by Flurk. The next three take us back a few years. Thanks to BFD. Here's Dawn Dunlap in 1979's "Laura". Jumping even farther back to the swinging 60's...this is Susan George in "The Strange Affair". One more from '68. once again, here are a few 'caps of Susan George in "The Strange Affair".