Getting It On (1983) is a teensploitation film original called American Voyeur. It was made on a microscopic budget, yet had a substantial theatrical release. It is currently rated 2.8 at IMDb, which is not a fair rating, as this is neither better nor worse than other low budget teensploitation films of the era. It was shot on 35 mm, and managed a decent box office, even though there was no drive-in market left. It was even favorably reviewed at the time by Hollywood Variety.

There is a main plot, and an intersecting sub-plot. A High School aged geek lacks the experience and confidence to approach women, but that doesn't stop him from spying on his new neighbor. Binoculars are ok, but he convinces his father to finance a video taping business, and sets up spy cams, with the help of his best friend. His best friend is not the favorite of the school principal, and the two plots begin to converge when a home video of the principles daughter and the best friends brother is played at a school assembly. Will our hero get the girl? Will his friend be thrown out of school?

The plot is fine, but of more interest to me was the feature length commentary from director/writer/producer William Olson, who elected to focus on technical aspects of making a low budget independent film. He first released it to local theaters, and it did well enough that he picked up a distribution deal, with an opening in nearly 1,000 theaters. The distributor forced him to change the title to Getting It On, a phrase that was used once in the film, but really doesn't say much about it. I have often wondered where some movie titles came from. He used Fugi stock, mostly because it is 20% cheaper than Kodak, but also because it "has a more pastel look." I also preferred Fugi when I shot film, as it has a cooler color temperature, tending more toward blue than toward red.

He shot almost no closeups or coverage shots, and this was also a matter of budget. Rather than use frequent cuts and different camera angles and lenses, he went with long takes and carefully blocked the actors to tell the same story. It is not just the actual footage that ends up in the final cut here, but each take has lead-in, marker, and lead-out footage, meaning the more cuts you have, the more film is wasted. He was very honest about how much having a good DP saved him. One of the requirements was to shoot TV screen scenes. The DP developed a technique of projecting the clips onto tracing paper covering the front of a gutted TV chassis, using a projector with a frame rate that synched with their camera. He also was not shy about pointing out the bloopers, such as an audio cable visible in a mirror, and the shadow of a boom mike on the wall.

Also interesting is that this DVD is the best looking edition of the film ever scene. When they remastered, they were able to digitally enhance some dark scenes, and reset the cropping in others, to eliminate a visible boom mike, and lighten overly dark scenes.

Kathy Brickmeier and Kim Saunders shows breasts. There is also a scene with for girls having a pillow fight in their dorm room. One shows breasts, and another full-frontal, but the four are not identified separately. The film is a classic C by our scoring system, as a good enough genre effort, but the commentary is well worth the time for those interested in the hows of budget movie making.

She Hate Me (2004) - day 2

Follow up - zipped .wmvs

• Jack impregnates five lesbians in one night. The nudity comes from Paula Jai Parker (the blonde black woman), Bai Ling (the Asian women, one nipple), and Savanna Haske (the white woman who talks too much). The other two (non-nude) are Michole White (the woman with the glasses), and Sarita Choudhry (the uptight Indian woman).

• Jack surprises his fiancee (Kerry Washington) in bed with another women (??)

Prymate (2004 - theater)

Here are many more collages of soap star and six-time Emmy nominee Heather Tom in the obscure Prymate, as collaged by the guy who took the pictures. I shrunk them back to VCR size (240 lines), and edited them somewhat (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6).

Other Crap:

Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the links above, since it's sorta in real time.

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MOVIE REVIEWS:

Words, pictures, and vids from ICMS

La femme de boulanger (1999)

• Astrid Veillon 1(.wmv zipped, .avi zipped)
• Astrid Veillon 2 (.wmv zipped, .avi zipped)

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Today we have part two of our 'Damsel in Distress" special with Melissa Sagemiller in "Love Object".

In this batch, Melissa suffers more torment at the hands of her kidnapper and we get to see bare breasts.

We also have three scenes of Melissa lovemaking and exposing her tattooed tit. (links 13-15)

• Melissa Sagemiller (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15)

"The Jackhammer Massacre"
A B-horror movie is supposed to be bad, and this 2004 entry, also known simply as Jackhammer, is admittedly bad just where you'd expect - poor acting (sometimes), bad script writing (sometimes), and a shaky plot (sometimes). The problem is it's also very good in those same areas (sometimes).

For starters, the movie has an excellent anti-drug theme throughout, maybe by accident or maybe on purpose, but no one can see this movie and come away thinking drugs are cool. Jack (little word play there.....character's named Jack and he kills with a jackhammer) has it all. Great car (I'd rather have a Viper in any color than yellow, personally, but hey.....), a very good job, and things are good. Unfortunately, a lack of self esteem leads him to get heavily involved with drugs, and when his best friend dies of an overdose, Jack really goes on a drug bender, and there goes the car and job.

Now living as a security guard for a closed machine shop, and never drawing a straight breath, it looks like Jack has met his fate when bad guys seeking money he owes them give him what should be a fatal overdose of a drug cocktail, enough to kill several elephants. Instead, Jack now really goes beserk, and starts killing everyone in site with a jackhammer, egged on by his dead friend who talks to Jack constantly.

It's so bad, with so many good parts, that at the end you scratch your head wondering: Did I just see a really good bad movie, or a really bad good movie?

• Rachel Rotten
• Kitty
• Kat Stephens

"Vlad" (2003)
Billy Zane vampire movie filmed in Transylvania, Romania.

• Monica Davidescu: Romanian actress shows boobs and butt having bath, then having vampire sex.
• Iva Hasperger: partial boob having vampire sex.

"Ski School 2" (DVD) (1995)
Ski-sex comedy only available on DVD in Europe. The quality is cystal clear. Hefmag hefmate Wendy Hamilton is totally nude while painting in the cold, cold snow. Since it appears she wasn't wearing a muff warmer down there she must have gotten chapped lips.

• Wendy Hamilton: boobs and butt.
• Shannon Lee Brown: boobs and butt.
• Heather Campbell: nipple pokies.
• Jane Sowerby: major leg and upskirt.
• Carrie-Lee Alhassan: see through brassiere.
• Patty Kuprys: boobs and thong.
• Denisa Ronzani: boobs and thong.
• Sarah Richardson: sexy as lesbian bartender.
• Beatrice Zeilanger: cleavage as domitrax.

"Detention" (2003)
Dolph Lundgren action with almost every bad cliche about urban schools gone bad. The solution would be a state-of-the-art detention hall where children are held in place with magnets.

• Jennifer Baxter: cleavage as secretary, having fully clothed sex with the Dolphster.
• Danielle Hampton: tight sweater as pregnant student.
• Nicole Dicker: very sexy as another student.

Forbidden Highway
Finishing up this week's batch with some Skinemax. Here we have scenes from Forbidden Highway. Plenty of nakedness by Ava Lake, Tracy Ryan and Kira Reed.

• Ava Lake aka Mia Zottoli (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
• Tracy Ryan (1, 2, 3, 4)
• Kira Reed (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)