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"The Yards"

The Yards (2000) is about corruption in the New York boroughs regarding the way transit repair contracts were awarded, and is based on a true story. In his review, Scoopy explained how the system of kickbacks and back scratching works in the real world, and why it exists. It is a quick read -- about 3 minutes -- and says more, and is more interesting, than the entire 115 minutes of The Yards. At the time of Scoopys review, the IMDB rating was 7.4, but has since dropped to 6.8/10. The film is like real life, and shows what real businessmen and real corrupt politicians and crooks really do. But, as we all know, reality is a crutch for people with no imagination.

The film loses the catchup race, moving slower than a K-Mart checker, and has no real peaks of excitement. It is more like a documentary about a subject that just isn't interesting. In much of the film, they only use half of their Widescreen aspect ration. As a matter of fact, I cropped the scene of Charlize Therons breast exposure to 4/3, and had everything except a black wall still in frame. (here's an Example) I pushed pretty hard to get the Theron scene large enough to really see. I am not sure what to call the genre, but this seems to appeal to some critics, Scoopy, and early IMDB voters, but certainly not theater goers. I can't give it better than C, despite a talented cast.

  • Thumbnails

  • Charlize Theron (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

    "Brooklyn Babylon"

    Brooklyn Babylon (2000) is yet another Romeo and Juliet star-crossed lovers story, this time set in Brooklyn in adjacent black and Jewish neighborhoods. Juliet, played to perfection by Karen Goberman, is a Jewish American Princess from an orthodox family, engaged to a militant and thug-like Jew. She would prefer to attend college. Romeo is a Rastafarian rap star (played by Tariq Trotter). The literally bump into each other when the cars each are riding in collide at an intersection. It is obvious that racial tension is high, and it is against this backdrop that the two become acquainted and fall in love.

    The film actively stresses cultural differences, but, by the way it is cut, also shows the similarities. For example, we cut back and forth between a club where Solomon (Trotter) is rapping and everyone is dancing, and a Jewish wedding with chanting, and dancing, showing the parallels. If you like hip-hop, the sound track is a keeper, and Trotter is performing through much of the film. Goberman is either a Brooklyn Jewish American Princess who was type cast, or is a very promising young actress, or both. She has a short love scene with Trotter that is nothing but double exposure, cross fades and the like, but I pulled a couple of breast shots out of the jumble.

    Critics are luke warm about it, with Apollo at 63%, but all end their reviews saying that it is watchable despite its flaws. There are only 25 votes at IMDB, currently at 7.4/10. I agree that it is watchable, with some good points, and production values are good. The DVD is bare bones. It is a solid drama, which will appeal to fans of the music as well, but probably won't win many converts from the comedy or action lovers, so this film is a C.

  • Thumbnails

  • Karen Goberman (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
  • Unknown

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    All Over the Guy sure tricked me. Features Lisa Kudrow and Christina Ricci. Rated r for "strong sexual content". So i watch it on spec.

    Turns out it's a GAY romantic comedy - When Harry met Solly - and those two women I mentioned have meaningless cameos. No nudity at all.


    Cold Heart marks the passing of an era, as an overweight 41 year old Nastassia Kinski stars in an erotic thriller, and uses a body double in every single nudity scene. Shannon Tweed did that earlier this year, so I'm feelin' a bit old now, lads.

    I did no caps because there is only body double nudity (The Evil Calisto was also in this, but she stayed fully dressed)


    I just had to add my two cents' worth when I saw that gorgeous trailer from Sam Raimi's Spiderman (info below)



    NUDITY REPORT (and movie info)

     I regret to report that the Penelope Cruz nudity in Vanilla Sky is nowhere near as nice as in the original (Open Your Eyes). She's on her back. Cameron Diaz supplies no nudity at all.

    I haven't seen the movie yet, but advance word is NOT good. It is based on a terrific Spanish movie, and Cameron Crowe has never really had a flop, so this was highly anticipated, but it isn't working out the way they planned.

    Cinemascores are poor.

    Vanilla Sky



    Overall Grade
    Genre Drama
    Release Date December 2001
    Box Office Not Available

    Under 21
    21 to 34
    35 and Up


    Reviews are below-average. Here is Rotten Tomatoes' summary. Only 32% good reviews

    Here's the IMDb summary. Score: 6.3

    I haven't seen it, but I'm going to skip it for now, wait for the DVD, and re-watch the original, Open Your Eyes



     Today's game: YOU BE WINONA'S LAWYER

    According to AP, Winona Ryder's lawyer, apparently a former Taliban spokesman, said that Winona was just carrying items between store departments, not trying to steal them, and she has receipts for the items she was accused of stealing. Of course,  those two statements make no sense separately, and even less sense together. For example, (1) if she could have produced receipts on her, they wouldn't have arrested her at all, would they? But if she didn't have the receipts on her, where could she possibly have them? (2) "carrying to another department" is an excuse for not having paid yet but intending to, while  "having receipts" implies that she had paid. So which is it?

    More important, however, the lawyer apparently made the statements before realizing that security officers saw her remove the security tags, then place the items in a bag,  then physically leave the store. (Or maybe he knew of this evidence and is claiming a conspiracy! Quick, call Johnny Corcoran.)

    Oops! Here's a tip for you dishonest youngsters. Find out all the evidence they have against you before constructing your lie!

    Now here's the challenge for you.  What story can Winona's lawyer tell next? You pretend you are the lawyer. You're stuck with the story you've already told before becoming aware of the facts. Given that you can't say you were "just lying", what new lies do you tell now to cover up, and simultaneously explain the old lies? Quite a challenge!

    My suggestions:

    1. She thought there were additional departments across the street.

    2. She thought the cash register was in the "other building".

    3. Another unbalanced star, possibly Robert Downey Jr, stole her receipts and planted the drugs

    4. She handed the receipts off to a confederate, but retained the merchandise.

    5. She showed the security officers her receipts, but they arrested her anyway, then destroyed the evidence. Fascist pigs.

    6. The cashiers forgot to remove those security tags, so she had to do it manually.

    7. Those security tags - you can remove them, can't you? It's not like they are mattress tags or anything important.

    8. She had placed the receipts in her vagina for safekeeping, and she was too embarrassed to take them out and show them to detectives.

    9. Winona is merely doing research for a part. (I hope it's one of those "Women in Prison" movies.)

    10. That wasn't Winona they arrested, but a lookalike. At the time, Winona was in her winter home on the moon.

    11. Mark Furhman planted the merchandise in her purse.

    Winona is really digging herself a Nixonesque hole here. All she has to say right now is "I have some problems. I really need some help", and people will not only forgive her, but praise her for her candor and humanity, and everyone will give her a group hug, including Saks and the legal system. That would actually help her career. People love to see others triumph over adversity. But these impossible and deranged alibis make her seem so unbalanced and so out of touch with reality that people won't want to hire her, ala the aforementioned Downey, Jr. If I were a producer or director, I'd think "I'm not getting mixed up in that".


    Encyclopedia updates: Diane Lane, Nicole Kidman,

    "Erotic Ghost Story"
    Starting with the best, Erotic Ghost Story or Liao Zhai Yan Tan, has plenty of the Bs. I'm relying on the IMDB for identification as my Chinese language ends at dim sims. This means that the identities could be wrong. The movie is the story of three randy sisters, played by Amy Yip, So Man and Chia Ling Ha, who are a thousand years old. But don't look a day over 25. They are enamored with a nearby gentlemen who turns out to be a bit of a devil, literally. There are a couple of other females that make it easier to watch, Chi Chun Ma and some unidentified female.
  • Amy Yip (1, 2, 3)
  • So Man (1, 2, 3, 4)
  • Chia Ling Ha (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
  • Chi Chun Ha
  • Other nudity (1, 2, 3)

    "One Night Stand"
    This Australian movie is based on the premise that the world is about to end as a result of a nuclear war. Cassandra Delaney and Saskia Post are waiting for the end in the Sydney Opera House with a couple of blokes, one a US navy deserter. Some brief nudity by Cassandra and some see-through by Saskia.

  • Cassandra Delaney
  • Saskia Post

    "In Your Dreams"
    Thandie Newton plays a rape victim In Your Dreams. The court case figures prominently. The caps show her version (with the clothes on) and his version (with her clothes off and a come-hither look). Just some topless nudity.

  • Thandie Newton

    "The Servant"
    A very young Sarah Miles is the female lead in The Servant. It was made in 1963 so no overt nudity, just some nice images.

  • Sarah Miles

    "Pascali's Island"
    Not a lot of nudity by Helen Mirren's standards in Pascali's Island, just a few topless views.

  • Helen Mirren

    "Welcome Home Roxy Carmichael"
    There's some nice cleavage shown by Laila Robins in Welcome Home Roxy Carmichael. There is also a nice butt shot of Ava Fabian, although you never see her face and it could be anybody.

  • Laila Robins
  • Ava Fabian

    "Through the Eyes of a Killer"
    There are some very brief topless caps of Marg Helgenberger in Through the Eyes of a Killer. It is puzzling though. She spends most of the movie covering up, even in the shower (look at the bottom right of the second collage). Then, whilst still in the shower, we suddenly get a good look at her boobs. As I said, puzzling.

  • Marg Helgenberger (1, 2)

    Hoodwinked is a Jake Spanner, private eye mystery starring Robert Mitchum. I like this genre of films and enjoyed it. He wanders into an apartment complex of nudists and there's some nice naked ladies. Not a lot to see however. There's also some lovely cleavage by Stella Stevens.

  • Nudists (1, 2)

    "Corsican Brothers"
    The Corsican Brothers is the usual Cheech and Chong drivel. They find a room of ladies in their underwear and start to enjoy themselves. A breast pops out in the fun. The ladies are named in the credits but I'm not sure who is who. The only one I recognize is Sophie Favier.

  • Assorted Ladies

    "The Settlement"
    Not a lot showing by Lorna Lesley in the Australian movie The Settlement.

  • Lorna Lesley

    "Leather Jackets"
    Bridget Fonda is topless in Leather Jackets, although the quality is not very good. There's a couple of topless strippers at a bucks party as well.

  • Bridget Fonda
  • Strippers

    "Smokey and the Bandit 3"
    Smokey and the Bandit 3 has Jackie Gleason chasing all over the countryside. In his travels he encounters some very brief nudity in a motel. Janis Cummins (I think that is who the woman is) is at a nudist party with a few friends. There are a couple of other interesting scenes, The tall, scantily-clad blonde in the second collage might be Ava Cadell.

  • Janis Cummins
  • Various (1, 2)

    "No Deposit, No Return"
    No Deposit, No Return or Vuoti a perdere is an Italian movie in which Silvia De Santis gets naked. An interesting movie. Silvia and her boyfriend are picked up for stealing a car. The detectives are bored and decide to interrogate them to fill in the time. It turns out they had a very full day, something that we see in flash back.

  • Silvia De Santis (1, 2, 3)

  • Iced T
    Cheryl Pollak
    (1, 2, 3)

    Comments also by Iced T:

    Yes, her face isn't visible in any of these shots. I don't think it's a double. Both these scenes pan to where her face is also visible. I don't know if I'd call her "beautiful", but she has a very unique look and a pretty nice body.

    Jennifer Connelly
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    Comments by the "T":

    Unfortunately, the DVD of "Inventing the Abbotts" is pretty lousy quality. I ended up throwing out all of the caps of the scene where she's wearing the blue dress and wasn't happy with the library scene either. Which is a shame, because she looks incredible in that blue dress. I'm totally jealous of this Crudup guy. He has done not one, but two movies where he gets to do love scenes with Connelly. Lucky bastard.

    Sandahl Bergman
    (1, 2)

    Shannon Tweed

    Both ladies showing some skin in "Possessed by the Night" (1994).

    Katja Woywood
    (1, 2)

    The German actress in topless scenes from "Tatort - Tanz auf dem Hochseil" (1998)

    Our first oddity from Nicnac....

    "The Revenge of Al Capone" aka "Capone" (1989). The best bit of trivia for this one....The director Michael Pressman also sat in the big chair for the immortal cinema classic "Doctor Detroit"! In all fairness, he's actually become a very good TV Director, working on series like "Picket Fences", "Chicago Hope", "The Practice" and "Boston Public".

  • Debrah Farentino, shows just a hint of breast exposure.
  • A topless fan dancer.

    "The Last Word" (1994)...big name cast, but you've probably never heard of it.

  • Michelle Burke, topless and partial thong views.
  • Various Strippers

  • Click Here!