Shredder (2003) is a straight to vid snowboarding teen slasher film. Having said that, the plot summary is probably unnecessary, as the usual cliches are all present. A group of college students goes to spend a few days at a closed ski resort that one of their father's is planning on buying and developing. They are warned away, and, when people start dying, the fun starts.
The high point is breast exposure from Holly Towne during the first of two sex scenes in the film. Of course, she is the first to die. The low point is the other sex scene, and the shower scene with Lindsey McKeon, where you can see the Band-Aid patches over her nipples. The special effects are incredibly cheap and cheesy, and the red herrings are way overdone. This is barely a C-.
|Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
Pretty Baby (1978)
two factors that make movies great are atmosphere and pacing. It is
not difficult to write an interesting story, or to hire competent
actors, or even to create interesting people, but it is very
difficult to place everything in the right context - sights, sounds,
texture, and the most difficult element of atmosphere, tone. It is
even more difficult to master pacing, to reach the point that great
directors reach, where audiences would not want their movies a
minute shorter or longer, and the audience members never find their
Atmosphere and pacing.
If atmosphere were 100% of the game, Louis Malle
would be Orson Welles, Kurosawa, Kubrick, and Bergman rolled into
one. But it isn't. And he's not.
If you look at still captures from Louis Malle's
films while listening to the soundtrack, you'd think he must be the greatest director of all. He
He is a master of tone and texture, but the man
has no sense of pacing at all. You sit and watch this movie liking
the characters, finding the premise intriguing, admiring the period
reproduction, dazzled by the beauty of the photography, and falling
asleep. Sometimes the feeling that overcomes you is worse than
drowsiness. It is embarrassment. You see those actors on the screen,
and they seem to be wondering why the scene hasn't ended yet, and
guessing what they should do next. They never seem to know how
quickly to respond to their cues, and they always seem to be looking
around, wondering why the camera is on them when they are merely
observing the real action, which is transpiring elsewhere. If they
were in a home movie, they'd be pointing Uncle Bill to the true
cynosure - "no, point the camera over there, not here".
I'm giving you the wrong impression. Louis Malle is
not a bad director. He's a very good one who should have been great
but just seemed to be missing the final ingredient. How can you make
a film about a 12 year old prostitute soporific, even though it is
beautiful to look at, and the soundtrack is sexy and appropriate?
I don't know, but he did it. It is still worth
watching, but you'll be haunted with the feeling that it should have
been so much more. The film has so many strengths that you should
watch it if you have any interest in artistic historical dramas, but
be fairly warned the whole is less than the sum of its parts.
- Susan Sarandon (1,
The trailer for Spiderman 2 - kick-ass trailer, do not miss it.
Actress Sues Snoop Dogg, MTV Over Show: "An actress has sued
rapper Snoop Dogg and MTV over an episode of the television show
'Doggy Fizzle Televizzle,' in which she claimed she was
unwittingly made to appear as if she were naked and engaging in
sexual relations with another actor. "
Put Another Nickel In Sing along. Remember the old-time
Disbelief and gloom seized many Palestinians on Sunday at news
of Saddam Hussein's capture. "Not many people know it, but
Saddam was a terrific dancer. And what a painter. He could
paint an entire apartment in one afternoon. Two coats."
Here's the latest photoshop contest on FreakingNews.com:
"Photoshop any of the following ideas: how they found Saddam,
Saddam in his hide-out, what will happen to him, or where he
is kept now."
TIME.com: 10 Questions For Dennis Miller -- Dec. 22, 2003:
Q: "A lot of California Republicans want you to run for
Senate. Will you?" A: "At some point that involves moving to
Washington, D.C., sitting in a room all day with a moron like
Barbara Boxer. I'm just not interested."
Miguel Tejada to join Orioles. Tejada is a good player,
but the Orioles still have a long way to go to be a factor in
the powerful AL East. The good news: they're only two players
away from contention. The bad news: those two players are
Sandy Koufax and Jesus.
News Babes. They aren't naked, but he has a nice collection
Love Withstands Furious Rally by Woods Get this - Tiger
was down by ten strokes on the 9th tee - seven holes later, he
had closed to within one, buoyed by a stretch of five
consecutive birdies. Love stayed cool, however, and pulled it
American Film Institute Honors Year's Top 10 Films. Hey,
at least they didn't nominate "From Justin to Kelly". As
always, the list is dominated by ultra-serious fare, weepers,
and epics, except for one kids' movie. There is the usual bias
against entertainment films and comedies. Great entertainment
films, like X2 and Pirates of the Caribbean, and a great
comedy A Mighty Wind, take a back seat while mediocre serious
movies like The Human Stain make the list.
AgeGuess.com - Guess people's Ages -
Lucifire, mistress of suspension. (And fire-eating, and
other stuff people shouldn't fuck with.)
Newspaper Ads from past decades. Very nostalgic.
Dean supporters try to spin Saddam's capture! Actual
examples (1) "I think it is shameful that the ACLU has not
commented on the obvious mistreatment Hussein has suffered at
the hands of the American military." (2) "I can't believe this
(Saddam's capture). I'm crying here. I feel that we now don't
have a chance in this election."
Official Site of Bettie Page :: nude photos
New DVD recorders will speed copying
The Broadcast Film Critics Assn. will jumpstart the 2004
Critics' Choice Awards with its newly conceived 10 Best Fest,
a week of film screenings devoted to the critics' best picture
The ten cultural regions of the USA, and how they affect
The ten cultural regions of North America before the Europeans
arrived. Things haven't changed as much as you may have
thought. (see link above)
The BBC says Cold Mountain bites the big one. Much hyped
as an awards contender, Cold Mountain has received mixed
reactions from the early reviewers. BBC (two stars out of
five) called it "full of hot air", "suffocated by the stringy
score", and filled with "vomit-inducing soft-focus longing".
- Here's the trailer for
Cold Mountain. The "large" trailer is just about DVD
Penis Man knows how to party. Don't think about it, just
- Violent video game
banned in New Zealand.
- Nearly a month after his
Michael Jackson could be charged this week in a child
Members of the peanut gallery at fark.com offer their
suggestions on the topic "what did the Iraqi info guy say
about Saddam's capture"?
Photo slideshow of the Saddam capture. Highly detailed. I
could have done without some parts of his medical exam.
Especially the procto.
Florida Greenpeace Case Hinges on 1872 Bordello Law
ship-boarding activists are being prosecuted under the 130
year old law which was designed to prevent bordello owners
from sneaking on arriving ships in order to be the first to
sell booze and hookers to incoming swabbies. The Greenpeace
arrest is the first arrest under the law in 113 years.
Something's Gotta Give tops the box office. The Farrelly's
Stuck on You opened in third place. All of these numbers will
be altered radically on Wednesday when the big dog joins the
Computerized beer tap will pour a pint in two seconds. At
last, the real reason why computers were created.
The complete script for every single episode of Seinfeld.
PAKISTAN'S president escaped an assassination attempt today
when a bomb exploded minutes after his motorcade passed a road
near the capital. Calll me nutty, but if I ran Pakistan, I
would not announce the route of my motorcades.
Pigeons are faster than the internet, create less shit.
Group to broadcast new ad criticizing Dean. Reminiscent of
the Willie Horton ads, it shows Osama and implies that Dean
doesn't have the experience or the strength of will to deal
with him. And it's being funded by Democrats!
Pirates of the Caribbean sold 11 million copies on home media
in its first week. This is the record for a non-animated
Kevin Brown is officially a Yankee. The Dodgers traded him
for a bag of magic beans.
US singer Lauryn Hill blasts Catholic Church - in a concert at
the Vatican!. "Hey, what is the big deal on girls wearing
patent leather shoes, anyway? And those priests, when they
sing at Mass, always off key ..." . The article says that
Hill's outburst will probably be cut from the broadcast
version. Gee ... d'ya think?
Colin Farrell drinks 45 beers on one night and gets naked in
public (in an Islamic country).
Saddam Captured While Playing Santa In Billings, Montana Mall
CBS Late Show - Top Ten Reasons Paris Hilton should appear on
CBS Late Show Top Ten Signs you're at a bad office Christmas
archives. May also include newer material than the ones above,
since it's sorta in real time.
to submit a URL for inclusion in Other Crap
are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the
review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that
there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written
by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too
ashamed to admit it.
|Hot pic of the day!
WOW! Mary-Louise Parker bares all 3 B's in scenes from last night's episode of the HBO mini-series "Angels in America"!
'Caps and comments by Spaz:
Trailer Park Boys season 1 & 2 DVD set
One of the hottest Canadian cult properties available only from Canada! This franchise started from a zero budget short and then developed as a low budget television pilot. On a cold sell the producers managed to have this green lighted for a television series on Showcase Canada where it quickly gained a cult following. One of the TPB's biggest fans outside Canada is Kid Rock (who dated upscale Canadian trailer park hoe Pamela Anderson).
The two season DVD set is pack full of features and extras. Despite the adult content there is almost no nudity except for a stripper in the background of a real life strip club. But with the explicit language, gunplay and drugs this is has to be aired in the USA.
Other Canadian stuff although some have US leads.
"Payoff" (1991) (TV)
Canadian drama with US leads Keith Carradine and Kim Griest. Unfortunately Keith Carradine shows more nudity then his co-star
- Kim Greist: silhouette striptease and partial breast exposure.
- Suki Kaiser: sexy underwear in one her first roles.
"Escape Clause" (1996) (TV)
Mystery involving bondage, s&m and murder. US lead Kate McNeil shows a lot of skin considering this is a standard cable movie.
Bad bad sci-fi horror. Starr Andreef shows some near breast and then wraps herself in a shear bedsheet.
"The Michelle Apartments" (1995)
Dark comedy with alot of sexual tension. Mary Beth Ruben's last movie.
Something to do with a modeling agency. No nudity.
"Giant Mine" (1996) (TV)
Real life Canadian drama with Tammy Isbell showing full dorsal nudity in a love scene near the end.
"Melanie Darrow" (1997) (TV)
Dreadful Delta Burke vehicle saved by Krista Bridges star spangled hooters.
"Falling Through" (2000)
International thriller. Russian actress Yekaterina Rednikova (aka Ekaterina Rednikova) has a rather tacked-in softcore sex scene.
Toronto Film Festival (sept, 2003)
Paparazzi pic of movie extra Nadja Anema almost falling out of her dress.
'Caps and comments by PAL:
Nothing new and/or interesting aired on TV here during the last week, so I recapped some already known scenes for Fun House viewing pleasure.
- Christine Boisson, and exposed breast in scenes from "En Face".
- Isabelle Huppert, topless and frontal nudity in "Violette Nozière"
- Lucy Liu playing a topless dancer in scenes from "City Of Industry".
- Karina Lombard see-thru breast and bum views in "Exposé".
- German actress Sissi Perlinger topless in "Der letzte Kurier".
'Caps and comments by Crimson Ghost:
First up today...the Skinemax flick "Sex Files: Ancient Desires" (2000).
- Collages of Amber Newman topless and gettin' it on.
- Amber again, large single frames this time.
- Collages of Regina Russell having a bunch of pseudo-sex. Breasts, plus brief bum and pube glimpses.
- More Regina in single frame 'caps.
- Collages of Jenna Bodnar showing breasts of course, plus brief bum and pube views.
- Jenna Bodnar, larger single frames.
- Caroline Key Johnson
- Daria Derly
- Griffin Drew, all 3 B's.
- Zoe Paul...one more triple B performance from "Sex Files: Ancient Desires".
Next up...some material not from "Ancient Desires". Instead, here are some 'caps from the 1981 classic, "Cannonball Run".