"Lightning Jack" (1994)
Paul Hogan is Lightning Jack, an Australian outlaw in the old West. Cuba Gooding Jr. plays a mute who becomes his sidekick, and Beverly D'Angelo is a hooker who is waiting for him to retire and take her away. Hogan wrote and produced, hoping to repeat his success with Crocodile Dundee. Hogan was
the whole show, and, even with the great accent and his considerable charisma, this is a movie well worth missing. Maltin awards 2 stars, IMDB readers have it at 4.6/10, which is low even for a western comedy, Ebert gives 2 stars, Berardinelli 1 1/2 stars, and I award 1. I adore Beverly D'Angelo, who is allowed to show cleavage, but not given much of a role, and am not completely immune to Hogan's charm, but this comedy was simply not funny. Also, no amount of acting talent can save a part with a one dimensional character (or less). Domestic gross was $16.8m.
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Beverly D'Angelo
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Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
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I reviewed the very lame Shaft. They took a suitable and demi-legendary cinema franchise, hired the perfect guy to play the part, then turned him into an uncool, self-righteous eunuch. No nudity. They should have listened to the words of the theme song before writing the script. This Shaft couldn't get laid in Vegas with a fistful of hundreds.
And then I laughed my ass off at the lowbrow but very funny Scary Movie. In an alternate world, this could win the Oscar for best picture. Picture this reality: a world where comedy and drama get equal respect from critics and the academy, and in this same world the best comedy is judged by (and this is a frightening concept) which one gets the most laughs. And, get this, you can measure that objectively, by measuring the noise level inside the theaters. It would eliminate the need for movie critics, who don't generally understand humor anyway.
Can't be our world. Too sensible.
Am I seriously suggesting this movie should win an Oscar. Well, no, but... this movie was very difficult to watch in the theaters because the audiences were laughing so hard that you'd miss half the lines. When I played it on my DVD player, Katya was laughing so hard I had to rewind, and then she asked me to give her the DVD for Christmas.
That should count for something.
There was some incidental nudity from extras, and some cheesecake from Mrs Rodman and Cheri Oteri. There was a rapid-motion look at the behind of the Anna Faris character, but I don't know if it was Faris or a double.
TomCat worked on "Midsummer Night's Dream" with Calista Flockhart, David Cronenberg's "Shivers" (not sure of the actress. TomCat thinks it is Susan Petrie), Bibi Andersen in Almodovar's "Kika" (you may want to put
away that erection. I think she's a he, or used to be. I think Bibi is a post-op transsexual, an artist formerly known as Manuel Fernandez. And he or she is Spanish, of course, despite the blond hair and Swedish name.)
In addition the ol' Pole Cat captured a bunch of nude and topless frames from Sex and the City (sorry, not the stars), from the episode in the public baths.
The smut....
Carmen Electra, "Scary Movie"
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Anna Faris, "Scary Movie"
Cheri Oteri, "Scary Movie"
More from "Scary Movie"
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Calista Flockhart, "Midsummer Night's Dream"
Susan Petrie, "Shivers"
Bibi Andersen, "Kika
"Sex and the City" nude variety
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A note from Jr.
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Slim pickins in the world of Celebrity nudity. I guess everyone is either out shopping, or dealing with inclement weather. So today, I've divided up my portion of the Fun House into brand new stuff, and a "Greatest Hits" section.
| New Stuff
| Manuela Arcuri
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We featured images from the Italian babe's calendar not too long ago. These are actually new and improved versions of a few of those images. What makes them so special is that they are all quite large and very high quality.
| Jessica Alba |
Tuesday on "Dark Angel", FOX's hottest new actress did a brief bra scene. In case you missed it, DAI put together a superb collage with some great partial exposure.
| Janie Draper |
From Dann, vidcaps of Janie playing a stripper in the Christopher Walken/Sean Penn movie "At Close Range".
| Ellen Ten Damme |
Very nice topless vidcaps of the Dutch actress from 1998's "An Amsterdam Tale"
| Anna Kournikova |
Only a head shot, but thanks to Anna, tennis has never looked better! Excellent scan by Sisyphus.
| Claire Stansfield |
Topless scenes from "Gladiator Cop" starring b-movie action dude...Lorenzo Lamas.
Here's a stupid, "I almost had a celebrity story" story....Back in March, Lorenzo headed up to Vancouver, British Columbia to film a new TV show. One of my best friends in LA worked with Lorenzo during the shooting of his other tv show, "Air America". One day, my friend came to me and asked if I would be willing to take care of Lorenzo's dog while he and the family were in Canada. I said sure, no problem. But alas, at the last minute Lorenzo backed out and took the mutt with him to Canada.
Hey, did say it was stupid.
| Greatest Hits...
| Lil' Kim |
A few days ago I mentioned an email that posed the question..."which celeb would do porn first, Britney Spears or Lil Kim". Topless pics will naturally happen long before porn, and perhaps more sooner than later. We first posted this scan of Lil' Kim that back in October, and it may answer our "who will be first" question. If I'm not mistaken, I think I see a hint of nipple behind those cupped hands. Can full topless exposure be far off?
| Britney Spears |
For the sake of equal time for each of the candidates...here's Britney in a bikini on the beach. Scan by StopMotion from around the same time as her Britney in Hawaii concert thing.
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Alessia Marcuzzi
Zoe
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Brainscan has submitted a ton of great work in the past few months, and that made it difficult to only pick a couple for this section. However, once I narrowed my search to exclude unknown Brazilian babes with killer arses and former Page 3 girls from the 80's it was so much easier. I think you'll enjoy.
-All in good fun Brainscan :-)
| Toni Braxton |
I'm not a big fan of her music, but I never say no to see-thru nipple sightings. Excellent scan by Black Sheep.
| Elizabeth Hurley |
Liz is a mega-babe, that's a given. But I find this scan particularly sexy. In fact it's one of my favorite Liz scans. Great job by Bad Ax.
| Penélope Cruz |
She's a beautiful Spanish celeb, and these 'caps from 1992's "Jamón, jamón" feature many frames of her very lovely breasts (also Spanish by the way).
| Kristin Davis |
One of the bigger stories in the world of celebrity nudity in the past few months was Kristin apparently breaking her own non-nudity clause on an episode of the "Sex and the City". It was a very brief scene, but it showed both nipples in great lighting. I guess if you're going to do it, do it right! Graphic Response came through with this great collage covering the event.
3 ladies down, one more to go!
| Rosie Perez |
Mongoose put together this collage from the Spike Lee movie, "Do the Right Thing". Definitely one of the best examples of Rosie topless.
| Julie Michaels
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Of course it couldn't be a greatest hits collection with out vidcaps from Scoop's favorite..."Roadhouse"! Vidcaps of Julie stripping by Oz.
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Heidi Klum
Nicola Formby
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A couple of highlights from the Chumba collection. Heidi is barely wearing black lingerie in a GQ appearance, and the lovely Nicola isn't wearing a thing (but alas, the goodies are all hidden).
| Jeri Ryan |
Well, I am an admitted Trekkie, so you should have seen this coming. Actually I chose this because it's a rare set of vidcaps from a crappy Tori Spelling movie, 1996's "Co-ed Call Girl". But honestly, who cares about Tori...the 'caps feature Seven of Nine in a bikini, and in a bubble bath! Excellent work by Blackshine.
| Kelly Brook
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An excellent series of images with the British beauty going from sexy bikini, all the way to nude. Sadly these scans from the UK GQ never reveal any of the really good parts, but they still are some of her best pics if you ask me.
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Delphine Pacific
Janine Lindemulder
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Kim Yates
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Kira Reed
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Elizabeth Berkley
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Some of the best B-movie stuff to be posted lately came from Uco.
Beginning with excellent topless frames of Delphine Pacific from "The Price of Desire".
Janine...adult film star, Vince Neil's former girlfriend, and the nurse with the cleavage on the cover of the Blink 182 album. Topless and full frontal vidcaps also from "The Price of Desire".
Kim Yates in scenes from "The Price of Desire".
Kira Reed, a Skinemax legend showing off her big ol' natural boobs in scenes from "Losing Control".
Berkley topless in "Any Given Sunday". Granted, it wasn't a B-movie, but Elizabeth certainly qualifies as a B or lower actress.
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