Best Nude Scenes of 2006:

Balloting has begun: vote and/or check the results, as well as last year's results, here.




* Nastassja Kinski in Polanski's Tess. (Zipped .avi)




The Other Crap site has simply become too big and detailed to fit into my Fun House column. It contains far too much info, too many graphics, too many news feeds, and too many embedded videos to include here. Plus the scoopy.net version was always a day out of synch. You fans please catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.




Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format. Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.




Killer Nun (1978)

"Killer Nun" was a headline about a real nun who worked in a rest home, and was murdering elderly patients to steal their jewelry. The phrase appealed to producer Enzo Gallo, and he acquired the motion picture rights to use the story and the headline. Then he hired a young Giulio Berruti to write a script and make the film. Since Berruti had experience as an assistant director, and had developed rapport with many actors, Gallo hoped he would be able to sign some names for the film. That he did, talking Anita Ekberg, a legendary beauty, to star in the film against Joe Dallesandro.

A kleptomaniac killer nun was apparently not enough of an idea to fill out a feature film, so they embellished the story to make her a little more interesting. She has recently recovered from brain surgery, and has a bitch of a morphine addiction. Further, her roommate, Paola Morra, is a lesbian, abused by her father, and in love with our sister of no mercy.

Unfortunately, that is pretty much all there is to it. Ekberg was definitely a name star, and she and Joe did their best, they were not given much of a script to work with. Sister Mary Ekberg starts selling the stolen jewelry to buy more morphine, and some of the patients catch on to who is killing them. Yawn.

D. (Not recommended even for those who might normally appreciate these stars or this kind of film.)

  • Nudity: Paola Morra does full frontal and rear nudity trying to seduce Ekberg. The nudity from Morra is plentiful, and she sports a major 1970s bush.  There was no nudity from the once-beautiful Ekberg, who was 18 years and many good meals past her La Dolce Vita prime.
  • IMDb: 5.1, but with few votes.
  • DVD: There is both an Italian and a dubbed English sound track, and the transfer is excellent -- better than the film deserves.



Paola Morra











Today we wrap up our little visit to "Malibu Express."

Sybil Danning was the best known actress to appear in this Andy Sidaris classic. Really just some very brief breast exposure, but some of the cleavage is just awesome from this oh-so-sexy woman. We have the caps below and a zipped file with 5 .wmv clips.










Notes and collages

The Celebrity Showers continue


Connie Stevens in Scorchy

... the mom of actress Joely Fisher, Ms. Stevens turned quite a few heads in her day ...




Joan Collins in The Bitch


...in this scene Ms. Collins gets joined by a shower buddy...




Carrie-Anne Moss in Red Planet


...Val Kilmer gets quite an eyeful when Ms. Moss asks him for a towel...









"Shadowboxer" (2005)


Vanessa Ferlito



Maria Soccor













Another Hilton heard from. This one is Kathy Hilton, mother of the notorious heiresses.



Paparazzi - Gisele Bundchen. It's way too small to be interesting but,. hey, it's Gisele.



Paparazzi - SNL's Amy Poehler.



Paparazzi - Kate Moss



The ever-naked Maggie Gyllenhaal in Happy Endings.



Keira Knightley in The Hole



Pink gets pierced



Irene Papas in The Trojan Women



Sharon Stone in The Muse. She has been in and out of condition in the years since Basic Instinct. This film did not represent a period of top tone.






Dann reports on Pelts (Masters of Horror series):

I've capped quite a few episodes of Showtime's Masters of Horror series, and I'm a big fan. This episode, Pelts, first aired December 1, 2006, and it's a very solid entry for the series, directed by Dario Argento, and taken from a short story by F. Paul Wilson. Being an Argento piece, it has plenty of what he seems to love: a good story, nudity, and gore.

A trapper calls a fur coat maker with an offer: he has some of the most beautiful raccoon pelts he's ever seen. When the coat maker arrives at the trapper's cabin, he finds trapper and assistant dead of grisly but unknown causes, so he takes the pelts anyway. As he works with the pelts, it turns out that anyone who comes in contact with them seems to meet a violent and bloody end. Not deterred, the coat maker lines up his favorite stripper to model the coat at an upcoming fashion event.

This one is very bloody, as you'd expect from Argento, but it's also a very worthwhile and appropriate episode for this great series.

Ellen Ewusie