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Sweet Georgia (1972):
Sweet Georgia was a Harry Novak release. This time, Something Weird Video lives up to its name. As opening credits are rolling, we see Barbara Caron, AKA Barbara Mills, riding naked on a horse over miles of desert terrain. Watching her the entire time is a fully clothed Marsha Jordan, rubbing her crotch. Meanwhile, the specially composed theme song plays.
Love is strong in the wide open West
Wild wicked and free
Love is bigger in the wide open West
Free as love can be
Ride ride ride on the plains
Love's strong hand on the reigns
Cast your love in the air
Show the world that you care
Love makes out in the wild blue West
For you and me.
Cut to a bedroom where Jordan starts undressing in front of a man. He asks, "What the hell are you doing?" "Just shut up and lay me," she answers. So he does, and so it goes. Seems Jordan is married to a drunken old coot who bought a ranch with a closed gold mine with the life insurance from his first wife. Without the wife to abuse, he must abuse their daughter, Barbara Caron. Jordan and two hired hands are hanging around in the hopes that the old drunk will reopen the played out gold mine, and they will become rich.
Before the film is over, everyone does everyone, and then someone does all but one of them in. My personal favorite was the pitchfork through the chest. All of this gratuitous sex, violence and nudity is accompanied by an original score that has to be heard to be believed. Imagine a taxi dance. Now, move the location to a small Western town, where a three piece band plays the equivalent of country instrumental music.
Caron and Jordan both do full frontal and rear nudity throughout the film. IMDb lists it as a comedy lasting 60 minutes. The actual running time is 79 minutes, and any laughs are unintentional. The opening sequence and theme song alone earn it a C- as a bad move. There was enough sex, nudity and bad music throughout for that score to hold up.
Tuna
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Amor Bandido Unfortunately, the quality of the Brazilian
film Amor Bandido (1979) is shocking but there is some nice nudity, especially
by Cristina Aché. Ligia Diniz is a fellow stripper
but her goodies are covered.
Ache
     
Diniz
Both
  
Who's Your Daddy
There's a lot of tease in Who's Your Daddy (2003) but the topless nudity
comes from some unidentified women playing volleyball on the grounds of a house
that is supposed to be similar to the Playboy Mansion. The tease comes from
Ali Landry, Marnette Patterson, Christine Lakin, Patsy
Kensit and Shera Danese.
Landry
   
Patterson
    
Lakin
 
Kensit
 
Danese
Volleyball chicks
     
Psych-Out
We see the briefest of nipple being shown by Susan
Strasberg in Psych-Out (1968).
  
Speed 2 - Cruise Control
No nudity in Speed 2 - Cruise Control (1987) but some nice pokies by
Sandra Bullock.
  
Arthur's Dyke
Arthur's Dyke (2001) is a British movie and there's no nudity. We see
Rebecca Lacey doing the deed in her lingerie.
  
Ready When You Are, Mr McGill
Another British film is Ready When You Are, Mr McGill (2003). There's no
visible nudity by Joanna Page, just some side views
as she films a topless scene.
The Muse
Sharon Stone must have been feeling her age in
The Muse (1999) as her nude scene is done by a body double. We only see her from
the rear and side. There are also some pokies by Andie
MacDowell.
Stone
   
MacDowell
Diagnosis Murder
Some pokies by Morgan Naylor in an episode of
the TV series Diagnosis Murder called Bringing Up Barbie (1999).
Good Will Hunting
Some minor pokies by Minnie Driver in Good Will
Hunting (1997).
Mean Girls
Mean Girls (2004) is a typical 'teenage girls acting as bitches in school
cliques' film. Rachel McAdams and Tina Fey are
shown in their underwear.
Rachel McAdams
 
Tina Fey
Goin' South
So nice see-through pokies by Mary Steenburgen
as she cleans herself in a river in Goin' South (1978).
 
The Other Woman
Laura Leighton is the other woman in The Other
Woman (1995) and we see her going for a swim in her underwear.
  
Backdraft
There are about 3 frames of Jennifer Jason Leigh's
nipple in Backdraft (1991).
  
Doing Hard Time
No nudity in Doing Hard Time (2004) but a lot of tease and pokies by
Patrice Fisher, Adrianna Bell, Wanda Acuna, Chenoa Maxwell
and Reagan Gomez Preston.
Fisher
Bell
Acuna
Maxwell
Preston
Basketball Diaries
The brief nudity in Basketball Diaries (1995) comes from a topless booth
dancer called Akiko Ashley. Brittany Daniel shows a
bit of sex appeal.
Ashley
 
Daniel
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I wasn't aware of this NIP scene in the snow by Emmanuelle Béart in À Boire
(2004) and thought I had discovered something new. That is until I checked the
Encyclopedia and found a collage from this flick by Charlie in it. I'm still
wondering how this could slip through my mind. At any rate I still invite you
to
check out
Emmanuelle's breasts and buns, which are briefly visible.
The movie itself is more an ordeal to sit through than anything else. À boire
is French for to drink and that is all there is to it. We see various
characters, all alcoholics, babbling in drunkeness to each other a few days
before New Year's Eve. Needless to say that this doesn't make much sense and
isn't very exciting to watch. Apart from Emma's way too short nude scene,
there were 2 other scenes of interest, somewhat funny ones more than 60
minutes into this comedy. I wonder how many people were still watching at that
point.
Director Marion Vernoux made a complete mess out of this one. There simply is
no plot line at all and her actors look way too fresh and healthy to be people
with a severe years-long alcohol addiction, as you can see proven in the film
clip. Lots of credit must go to the actors, for each put in a helluva
performance. They clearly mustn't have realized what a stinker they were
in. Two lukewarm laughs in 90 minutes, that must be the funniest comedy I've
ever seen.
Or maybe it's not meant as a comedy. Perhaps it just wants to show how silly
and stupid people can act when under the influence of alcohol. As if there is
still any need to demonstrate what everybody already knows. À oublier - to
forget - would have been a much more adequate title for this movie that has
nothing to offer except good performances by even better actors. What a waste
of talent and money.
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Dann reports on Dirty Love: Jenny McCarthy
and Kam Heskin play Dumb and Dumber blondes Rebecca and Carrie in
this 2005 comedy attempt.
Rebecca is a photographer dating a supermodel, and Carrie is an
aspiring actress that has never attempted to learn acting. Wonder why
she's aspiring?
Rebecca and Carrie's love lives are train wrecks. Rebecca catches her
latest flame, the model, boffing some chick. As she looks for true love,
she bounces from one loser to another, while totally ignoring her lifelong
friend John, a nerd who is madly in love with her but is afraid to let her
know.
Predictable plot and plenty of dead time is offset only slightly by a
few very funny scenes. The pretty girls help ease the pain, but the movie
is simply not very good. Watch it with the fast-forward button real close
by.
Jenny McCarthy
Dann reports on Sexual Life:
There have been a few movies that told several stories that were
seemingly disconnected except for a single thread that connected them
together. This 2005 comedy/drama from Showtime uses that technique, but
the tales are all about people's sexual lives.
Stories follow a hooker and her photographer client, the photographer
and his businesswoman girlfriend, the businesswoman girlfriend and her
boss, the boss and his wife, the wife and a hotel desk clerk, the desk
clerk and his ex-girlfriend, and the ex-girlfriend and her finance.
The stories are interesting and well done for the most part, but do get
a little draggy in spots. The movie is entertaining without being
remarkable, so while I don't highly recommend it, I didn't hate it either.
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Azura Skye |
Kerry
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Pat's comments in yellow...
DRUNKEN PLAYMATES GONE WILD
CBS4 in Denver reports that Playboy Playmates Danielle Gamba and Carrie
Minter were on a Frontier Airways flight to San Antonio for a lingerie show when
they allegedly became drunk and unruly. Witnesses said they were fighting
with each other and with passengers, and one insisted she was a celebrity and
that a woman who complained "better not mess" with her. A San Antonio
airport spokesman said one of the women tried to avoid arrest by making sexual
advances to the two officers. They were deemed to be a danger to
themselves and others, arrested for public intoxication and jailed for five
hours
* That holding cell had the best party EVER!
* They injured several passengers with their
rock-hard breasts.
MORE IRAQI PRISON TORTURE REPORTED
The Saddam Hussein trial for crimes against humanity is in recess for two
weeks, and Saddam didn't show up on Wednesday, but his former intelligence
chief, the much-feared Barzan Ibrahim al-Tikriti, kept his spirit alive.
After days of witness testimony recounting years of torture and mass murder,
Barzan launched into a diatribe about his own inhumane treatment. He
complained that he'd lost weight in jail because the food wasn't good enough,
he'd had to wait four months for cigarettes, and when he did get them, "they
were the worst quality in the world!"
* He used to give prisoners a high-quality
cigarette, just before he shot them!
CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS A SAFETY HAZARD
UK government job centers in Bolton and Farnworth, England, warned staffers
not to put up Christmas decorations because they're a safety hazard. They
said decorations hung from the ceiling could fall on someone and must be removed
immediately; no lights can be used that haven't been properly tested and come
with a 12-month warranty; and they can't "under any circumstances" put streamers
on the wall with Scotch Tape. They are allowed to have a Christmas tree,
so long as it is "small." A spokesman said they're not banning all holiday
decorations, but workers must be made aware of the risks.
* Like those pointy pine needles that are just a
lawsuit waiting to happen!...If you do get a tree, it has to be something soft,
like a fichus.
* And no mistletoe! Just imagine the
diseases you could catch!
* They don't need Christmas decorations; they're
already completely wrapped up in red tape. |
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