Friday

Some truly useless information

Mailing addresses for porn stars

Matt Drudge reported yesterday that the Clintons are about to divorce, and that the details will appear in the next issue of National Enquirer. When she moves to NY next month, she's never returning. Hillary recently snapped, "you'll go down in the history books as the first president to get divorced the day he steps out of the oval office".

Y'know, I never much envied Bill before, but look what he's about to get: still in his early 50's, a secure pension, plenty of time for golf, and no Hillary. I never would have traded places with him before, but now .....

I guess my friend, The Duck, and I can ask Bill if he wants to join our golf matches with O.J. We need a fourth, and it will be nice to have those secret service agents around because you never know when the Juice is going to snap. Going in the woods to look for a lost ball with OJ is like being thrown into the Blair Witch Project

.. except there is a possibility that something might actually happen.

Speaking of Witch ... and they say the rest of world is so smart. OK, I understand why so many Americans got tricked into seeing the grade z-minus Blair Witch Project because of the cleverly orchestrated publicity. But now that everyone has had a chance to realize that it makes a Lars van Trier movie look like the opening scene of Saving Private Ryan, why are they still going to it? Hollywood Reporter is listing good box office in several foreign countries.





NEW FEATURE:

LAWDOG and THE GIST

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Scoop's take on the "impress your friends" question, which basically showed us that everyone wants to be seen with a white euro-ethnic American:

First: In general, I'm at a loss to explain the poor showing of the Latina and non-white women, except that my favorites in this sub-group weren't on the list. (Cynda Williams and Salma Hayek, for example). I do understand why nobody voted for Naomi, despite her recent Playboy publicity. Two good reasons.

  1. Rhymes with "pitch"
  2. Research shows that no old bald rich Italian guys read the Fun House

However, this logic cannot explain why Jennifer Lopez, despite being everywhere in the past three months, finished lower than the superannuated Mimi Rogers.

Second: It doesn't really matter because it's just for fun, but it might have been better to take nominees for this poll, in order to get a more international flavor to it. The women not born American (Kidman, Hurley, Milla) are all English speaking and virtually Americans by virtue of their incorporation into the New York and Hollywood establishments. On the other hand, I don't think anyone from off the list could have made the top ten except Salma and Jennifer Connelly.
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The Gist and Lawdog







One Fish, Two Fish
Nude for Satan, part 3. Ensemble Nudity.

(#1, #2, #3, #4)
Scoopy, Only 3 of Chandra today. Also included 3 of Amber Valletta and 2 unknowns. I wasn't sure if you saw my plea for help on the message board so I wanted to tell you just in case. I haven't been able to connect to The Fashion Model Index. I think the site had done this once before, but I don't really remember for sure. There were a couple of responses from people who were trying to help (including one email to me), but the site is still not working and I'm not sure why. I've started going deeper into my achieves to find pics, but it is a lot more work because it isn't very organized. I think I will have enough to last a while yet, but it is hard to say for sure. I may also miss updates because I may not have the time to get the images ready. I just wanted to say this as kind of a warning that I may run out of images if I can't get back to the index. I really hope it doesn't come to that. I really enjoy seeing my pics on your site. If you want to ask people to look into the site, it might help. Here is the address in case you don't have it. http://fmi.csoft.net/ I am going to check the message board and maybe post another cry for help in a couple days. Meanwhile I am going to check the fmi everyday. If it comes back up I will let you and the board know.

Chandra North(#1, #2, #3) Amber Valetta (#1, #2, #3) Unknown (#1, #2)










Members' bonuses. Mother's Boys.
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Jamie Lee Curtis - evil? Actually, she did a pretty good job as the ex-wife from hell, but I don't think the box office really wanted an evil Jamie Lee. She's supposed to be threatened by evil, not represent it. What's next, Regis as Judas? Katie Couric as Satan? John Travolta as Bill Clinton?

Totally predictable movie. Not enough drama. No surprises. Not nearly enough nudity. Only one little nipple peek from Jamie Lee's still-magnificent breasts, and not even any cleavage or leg action from Joanne Whalley-Kilmer. Jamie Lee is a runaway wife who abandoned her husband and three small boys, and now wants them back. She manipulates the family by terrorizing the new girlfriend, by charming the oldest son (with whom she still has a psychic bond), by exploiting her legitimate legal rights, and by boiling the rabbit. Wait a minute, that rabbit thing was "Fatal Attraction". No rabbit, but she does make the family dog play "fetch" in front of the family car. The movie is a blatant rip-off of Fatal Attraction except the wife is bad and the girlfriend good. Yawn. Two thumbs down (the nudity thumb and the quality thumb).

The director is the same guy who directed "Free Money", that odd film with Marlon Brando and Charlie Sheen.

Y'know there is one positive surprise in this movie. It is a very nice transfer to DVD, and it was photographed very well to begin with, with beautiful interior and exterior shots. Give it a B+ for a professional look. But I can't think of much else positive to say.

By the way, the last two are body doubles

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Members' bonuses







Tuesday's girl:

Leilani.(#1 , #2 , #3 , #4)

The Sun also ran a "Page Three Gold" a babe of yesteryear. This is Gillian Duxbury, from October, 1977

Finally, some older galleries

Leilani (#1, #2, #3) Jade (#1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6) Tara (#1, #2, #3, #4, #5) Alex (#1, #2) Rachel (#1, #2) Sam Marina

PLUS Fred, or as he is known in the accient Elventongue "Frodo", specializes in "outing" the harder action from the wholesome girls of Page Three and Playboy Newsstand Specials. Here are today's comments:

(1)"HELP!!! This is a model who uses the name Rene most frequently. She usually works as a redhead, but you can see that's not her natural color. It wasn't until I noticed her in this black wig that I notice a resemblance to Charisma Carpenter before her boob job. I checked her out on a Suze Randall video where she was working as a Redhead, and she also sounds like Charisma Carpenter. Before I scan the rest of this magazine, please tell me that I'm hallucinating, and this is the same old model named Rene that I've been seeing for years."

(2) "Emma Ceasari, Playboy Model, Host of Night Calls on Playboy TV UK, and former Page 3 girl. The blond may be familiar, too. Is in my imagination or is Emma doing all the work here??" (#1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7)







FR Two terrific collages, but no naughty bits
  • Rachel Blanchard in "Clueless"
  • Barbara Eligmann at that "Bambi 99" thing







    • Members' bonuses. Stone Cold.
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    This is just my usual she-it, all the sugar from the Celeb mags: Skin, Sleuth, and Femme Fatales. I don't know who a lot of these women are. I actually had to pay for these magazines, because my dentist don't keep them on his waiting room table. He only got Vanity Fair, National Geographic, Highlights for Children, and Black Enterprise. I think this the standard dentist package. Magazine boys come by, sayin "I need to work my way through college and if I sell only four magazines I can go to Harvard." Mofo can't even spell Harvard, but he got some high hopes. So, the dentists just say "OK, well, just give me that dentist assortment. It'll be a swell tax write-off". All dentists talk like that, just like the cast of Fargo, even the brothas.

    There's a cupla looks at Laura Dern and Madeleine Stowe in public that I never saw before. I think that Madeleine might need to get her tires rotated or maybe a complete chassis rebuild like my friend IceMan got on his '58 caddy convertible. Laura Dern still got one fine long body with some good guns, but she now kinda one big ol' Steffi Graf lookin' sugar, and maybe a quick overhaul on the face, like rebuildin a carborator, cuz soon she be turnin into her pappa, and that one funny lookin' cracka.

    This Sheri Eckert as Sheena of the Jungle. I don't really stay in touch with any of the family back in Africa, but I don't recall any of the cuzzins talkin about no naked white women with no monster cannons up front. Must be hard to avoid gettin vine burns on them bouncers when she go swingin through the trees, makin them animal call noises like movie white people always make in the mofo'n jungle. If real white people made so much mofo'n noise in the jungle, we'da heard 'em comin and we'd still all be there.

    These are two girls in movies. I never seen em on the web before. I don't know how to do video captures. I scanned them from Celebrity Skin. Elizabeth Perkins in "I'm Losing You" and Hayley DuMond in "The Hunter's Moon". So Haley is the girl of the hunter's moon. Doesn't DuMond mean "of the moon" in some kinda language? Think she changed her name just for the movie, or maybe they sent out word they wanted a woman named after the moon.

    I don't know who these sugars are. Jessica Sobel. Lauren Hays.

    Even got a sista. Beverly Johnson. She kinda the 70's version of Naomi, I guess.

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