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"Dr. Jekyll and Sister Hyde" (1971)

Dr. Jekyll and Sister Hyde (1971) is a Hammer version of the classic tale, but with one small difference. The Hyde personna is female. Other than the scene where Dr. Jeckyl discovers to his complete delight that he does indeed have breasts, it was dark, slow, and predictible. Hyde was played by Martine Beswick, who shows breasts twice and buns once.

IMDB readers have it at 5.0/10, Maltin says 2 1/2 stars, and I will give C-. Interesting concept, but not much was done with it.

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  • Martine Beswick (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

    "Lust for a Vampire" (1971)

    Lust for a Vampire (1971) is another Hammer from the same year, but this time is a vampire story. It was to have been directed by Terence Fisher, who did the first in the Carmilla Karnstein trilogy. Most of the available information says that he was injured in a traffic accident, and was replaced by Jimmy Sangster. I suppose traffic accident is technically true, but not the "whole truth." Seems he was fond of getting royally pissed at the local pub, then playing chicken by dashing across the street through traffic. This time, the traffic won.

    The film stars Danish actress Yutte Stensgaard as the Vampire seductress who seduces professor Ralph Bates, along with several other men and fellow school girls. She shows her breasts in several scenes, as do several unknowns. Suzanna Leigh as Janet Playfair, the gym teacher has a very good see-through as well. The film is worth watching if for no other reason than Yutte, and most of it is shot in good light. As for plot, what can I say? It is a vampire film, so lots of necks get bitten, then the townsfolk rise up against the vampires.

    IMDB readers say 4.9/10, Maltin says 1 1/2 stars, I say C. The DVD transfer is good, and features a feature length commentary which is worth a listen.

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  • Suzanna Leigh (1, 2, 3)
  • Unknown (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
  • Yutte Stensgaard (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    NEW DVD RELEASE. Yet another Ted V Mikels movie with no nudity, called The Worm Eaters, a jaw-droppingly unfunny comedy, but probably the Citizen Kane of wormiverous entertainment

    Hard Ticket to Hawaii, is a Sidaris film with four naked Playmates. 'nuff said. You don't get explicit sex, or gyno shots. You do get four beautiful women showing off their ta-tas in good light, and a James Bond context which never takes itself too seriously. Plus lots more nudity in the special features. 

    NEW DVD RELEASE. Black Spring Break; the Movie. Not as bad as The Worm Eaters, but it had all the tools. 

    Except the all-important worm eating tool.

    • Rennay London-Simes (1, 2) 

    When was the last time you spent an evening watching black-people-at-the-beach movies? Probably never. It ain't easy to do, because there aren't that many to choose from, but I managed to take in two in one day. IMDB voters ripped Phat Beach a new behind, but Tuna and I agreed that, although there was nothing especially good about it, and it sorta sucked compared to what you expect from a theatrical release, it makes a pleasant-enough 90 minute video rental, if you like formula Annette and Frankie movies. This is just the usual clichéd beach movie, except it has black actors and breasts. That doesn't make it Battleship Potemkin, but there aren't any bare breasts or hip-hop numbers in Battleship Potemkin, so you might like this better if those are among your interests. Tuna covered this very extensively in the August 19th issue, so I just hit the highlights. If it really turns you on, the Big Fish did more than 30 collages that day, so head to the back issues.

    By the way, our current linguistic impasse on the socially acceptable terms for black people leads to some strange euphemisms. The video box calls Black Spring Break an "urban comedy", although it does not take place in a city, nor star city people. "Urbanites" must mean "black people", presumably because all white people live in the suburbs or on farms.

    Phat Beach is called a "street-flavored beach flick", even though it is about an upper middle class black kid who is at the beach with his dad's $100,000 Mercedes Convertible. I guess it could be street-flavored, if the street is Rodeo Drive. "Street-flavored" seems to mean "something having to do with black people". As you know, white people do not live on "streets", but on "terraces" and "lanes". Following the logic, "terrace-flavored" might imply that Barry Manilow did the score, while "boulevard-flavored" would imply Jacques Brel.

    I realize that you can't say "black comedy", because that means something else, but I think the language is calling out for a nice short term for "A Comedy Featuring People Descended from Dark-Skinned Africans" that we can all agree on and use without offending one another. Lacking such a word, I would have called these both "hip-hop beach comedies".

    By the way, Coolio may give Vince McMahon some competition for next years People's Choice Award for the least subtle facial expressions.

    First up...some familiar names...

    From the movie "Attraction" (2000)

  • Gretchen Mol looks great in pantie and pokies, plus there is a side breast view with nipple.
  • Samantha Mathis goes topless in two scenes. (1, 2)

    From "Save Me" (1993)...

  • Ashley Rhey goes topless and frontal
  • Lysette Anthony looks great with her top off in several scenes. (1, 2)

    A few more souvenirs from the Vault of Obscurity gift shop....

    A variety of toplessness from "New York Nights" (1984). The only noteworthy bit of info on this flick is that it was one of Willem Dafoe's first movies. He played "Punk Boyfriend"

  • Bobbi Burns
  • Corinne Alphen
  • Cynthia Lee
  • Missy O'Shea, she also shows some pubes.

    And finally...from the 1969 classic "School for Unclaimed Girls".

  • Michele Cook, topless in a shower scene
  • Topless Unknowns (1, 2)
  • Valerie Wallace, full frontal nudity

  • Variety
    Barbara Crampton and Brinke Stevens

    Deborah Shelton

    Melaine Griffith
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    The women of "Body Double" by BFD.

    Barbara goes topless and shows a slight hint of pubes in a sex scene.
    Brinke is topless.
    Deborah remains clothed, but still looks pretty good.
    Melaine shows her breasts and bum, and wears several skimpy outfits.

    Daryl Hannah Looking fantastic topless and in her undies in scenes from "Reckless" (1984). Great collage by DAI.

    Salma Hayek Salma working the brass pole in her undies from "Dogma". Thanks to Iced T.

    In Salma news...the follow up/sequel to "Desperado" is set to be released in March. In "Once Upon a Time in Mexico", Writer/Producer/Director Robert Rodriquez teams Salma up with Antonio Banderas reprising his character as El Mariachi. Last time they all got together, Hayek did a great nude scene. Hopefully they'll do another one.

    Tai Collins The very tan, and very robo-hootered Tai in scenes from "Enemy Gold" by DeVo. I just caught this the other night on Skinemax....good lord is it bad. "Enemy Gold" was written and directed by Christian Drew Sidaris (Andy's son), and doesn't quite live up to the quality normally associated with the family name.

    Where did things go wrong?

  • First...they actually tried really hard to follow a plot.
  • Second, instead of a great location like Hawaii, they filmed it in Dallas. (and used plenty of stock footage)
  • Third, all nude scenes and sex scenes were horribly short. So short that you coulnd't enjoy them. So short that they had no point even being in the movie. Let me tell ya, when the nude scenes are so short and boring that they have no point even being in a tittie movie... well, you can only imagine how bad the rest of the flick is!

  • Victoria Pratt Topless and thong views of the buff B-actress in scenes from "Whatever it takes" by The Goose. Now here is a movie with an interesting screen duo, Andrew "Dice" Clay and Don "The Dragon" Wilson. When you compare the two in the acting department, Dice comes out looking like Laurence "Frickin' " Olivier.

    Shari Shattuck
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    Topless in scenes from "Point of Seduction: Body Chemistry III" (1994).

    Melissa Anne Moore
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

    Scoop, another "Babe in Bondage" is Melissa Anne Moore tied up and getting a breast exam in scenes from "Angel Fist".


    From the mailbag
  • A vidcap challenge from a reader. As far as we know, there is no tape or DVD available so this might be a tough one.

    There's a movie I saw a while ago called "The Girl In The Watermelon". In it, Meredith Scott Lynn does a nude scene that I've never seen 'capped.

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