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Notes from Sleuth
Yesterday's FH {11/29} has six photos from the Mapplethorpe exhibit shown in the flick Dirty Pictures. All the models are readily identifiable: The first three and #5 are bodybuilding legend and Mapplethorpe muse Lisa Lyon {who later was the mistress of then-76 year old Dr. John Lilly--the inventor of the sensory deprivation tank immortalized in Altered States} ; the fourth link is a young, bra-clad Geena Davis {she was doing the Victoria's Secret catalog at the time}; and the last link is Robbie Chong, sister of Rae Dawn, daughter of Tommy.

In the video clips on 11/29, the topless guitar player in the Vanessa Paradis video is actually Swedish supermodel Emma Sjoberg {aka Emma S.} is by Vanessa, called Tandem, but she isn't topless in it. Tying back to Lisa Lyon, guess you could say Ms. Paradis currently suffers from sensory Depp-rivation.

All the best,

"The Psychiatrist" (1995)

The Psychiatrist, on the same DVD with Four on the Floor, is about a therapy patient who likes having anonymous sex. The doctor claims to disapprove, but is actually envious. She eventually works up the nerve to try it. Sorry for the short plot description, but that is all the plot there is. As I mentioned last night, the DVD is VHS quality or worse, and the usual constant dissolves, flashbacks, weird lighting, and cutting to Duchovny and his dog kill any passion that might have been there.

The third episode, Emily's Dance, is about a dancer who is nearly ready to give up go home to mommy. She auditions for a music video, and falls for the rapper who made the record. He goads her into letting go, and she finally performs up to her potential. She wore more clothes than the pope throughout. There were some stunt boobs from other dancers in a scene that is a total non-sequitur, but they were plasticized, blurry and unknown, so I passed completely on this one. I suggest you do the same on the entire DVD.

  • Thumbnails

  • Demetra Hampton (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12)
  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
    Uncle Scoopy's Top 10 Suggestions for a way to pick a president amid the current turmoil.

    10) Replace Electoral College with Hamburger University.

    9) Guy with the least lawyers wins.

    8) Skip costly time-consuming elections and court battles. Let the Governor of Florida pick the President.

    7) Two words: strip twister

    6) Scrap both unlovable candidates, pick Raymond - everybody loves him.

    5) Scrap both candidates, pick coverboy of People's "World's Sexiest Man" issue

    4) Do what we always do at the Fun House when we can't make a decision - run Jennifer Connelly.

    3) Both guys agree to fight to the death in a nationally-televised: "The Presidency beyond Thunderdome". Two dorks enter, one dork leaves.

    2) In a blind taste test, have Monica Lewinsky pick the guy who tastes the most presidential.

    1) Give the Supreme Court a morning radio show. Presidency goes to the 9th caller.

    Today's NEW RELEASES are:

  • Intimate Nights, a below-average erotic thriller with J. Cynthia Boooks (her real first name is John!!), Kim Lawey (I think this is the artist normally known as Kim Yates), and Lori Dawn, who also works as Lori Dawn Messuri.

  • The In Crowd, a bad movie in the grand tradition of bad movies, as only Hollywood can make them. Not as ludicrous as Habitat or as downright dumb as The Skulls, but still offering plenty to make fun of!

    Here's the smut:

  • Cynthia Boooks, "Intimate Nights" (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
  • Lori Dawn, "Intimate Nights"
  • Kim Lawey, "Intimate Nights" (1, 2, 3)
  • Lori Heuring, "The In Crowd" (1, 2)
  • Susan Ward, "The In Crowd" (1, 2)
  • Brainscan
    Comments and images by Brainscan
    A bunch o' Brit babes for youse today (or, as a group of peacocks is named, perhaps we should say this is an ostentation of Brit babes).

    Kelle Marie Farmar
    (1, 2)
    Kelle Marie Farmar is one of the latest page 3 pretties to pose for the bunnymag, under the name Kelle Marie. She has been known to pose a bit more exuberantly for other publications, as these two scans will demonstrate.

    Ruth Gordon
    (1, 2, 3)
    One Ruth Gordon played the 80-yr-old Maude in Harold & Maude; a different Ruth Gordon was a page 3er and a sometime companion to Andre Agassi. One of the scans is from the Page site and the other two from a more revealing but still tasteful source.

    Michelle Thorne
    (1, 2)
    Michelle on the other hand, appears to have never posed tastefully. She is one of the UK's more active porn stars, hardcore images of whom can be found here and there on the web.
    Calendar Girls
    Victoria Silvstedt
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7,
    8, 9, 10, 11, 12)

    From her 2001 Italian calendar. Nice to see her in some non-bunny nude pics!

    Manuela Arcuri
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7,
    8, 9, 10, 11, 12)
    Another Italian calendar, but this time with an Italian babe (plus even more nudity).
    and ...
    Madonna and Naomi
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    Just Madonna
    (1, 2, 3)

    From Pushe...Images of Madonna and Naomi Campbell doing a very nude photoshoot from a few years back ('90 or '91 is my guess). Plus the "just Madonna" images include two full frontals (#1, and #2).

    Myriem Roussel
    (1, 2)
    From Jimmy the Saint...Today his Holiness has two collages from the 1985 French movie, "Je vous salue, Marie". As always, no need to speak French to enjoy the nudity.

    Diane Lane
    (1, 2, 3, 4)
    A mini-gallery of one of my favorite actresses.

    The Breakdown:

  • #1 Topless scenes from 1987's "Lady Beware", by Helcrom.
  • #2 Fast forward 12 years and she still looks great nude in scenes from "A Walk on the Moon", also by Helcrom
  • #3 Back in time with Helcrom to these scenes from 1989's "Vital Signs".
  • #4 Mongoose's turn...breast exposure from "Chaplin".

  • Inna Zobova
    (1, 2)

    Nip slips in #1, turning the other cheek in #2.

    Marion Michael From RJL...Marion ('Liane the Jungle Goddess') from a 1959 issue of Caper magazine.

    "Soccer Moms" He-he...From the mail bag. Unfortunately I'm not sure of the source.

    Elke Winkens From Slarti...vidcaps with some topless fun from "Untersuchung an Mädeln" (aka "Girls Under Investigation").

    Diana Pang More Asian goodies from Sex and Guts. A companion set of vidcaps appeared in the Fun House a few days is Diana showing off the goods in "The Imp".

    Sheryl Lee New to me topless scenes from "The Blood Oranges". 'Caps by A5.

    Amanda Ryan One more by A5...vidcaps of Amanda going topless in scenes from "Elizabeth". I haven't seen the movie even though I know I should. But to me, period films are about as boring as lint. Regardless of my opinions about tales of dead euro royalty...why is there a dude with a lightsaber in this collage?
    The Funnies by Number 6

    As you are probably aware, if voting results in Florida stand as they are now, George W. Bush will be our next President. This will have catastrophic results in our vital-no, indispensable entertainment industry.

    Barbra Streisand, Martin Sheen, Susan Sarandon, Whoopie Goldberg, Alec Baldwin (possibly Robert Redford) -- among many others have sworn to leave the country if George W. Bush is elected President. And this is where YOU can help.

    We need volunteers to help pack and to load moving vans. We also need airfare for these irreplaceable national treasures so they can relocate before they change their minds.

    For the cost of a small SUV, you can sponsor one of these celebrities and their unfortunate relocation.

    You will know that your efforts are helping when you receive postcards, letters and pictures from your chosen "refugee" as they learn to become a useful citizen in the Third World country of their choosing.

    You will help, won't you? It costs so little but it means so much.

    Call 1-800-deport-a-lib.

    Operators are standing by. Major credit cards are accepted.

    New Florida Slogans

    FLORIDA: If you think we can't vote, wait till you see us drive.
    FLORIDA: Home of electile dysfunction.
    FLORIDA: We count more than you do.
    FLORIDA: If you don't like the way we count then take I-95 and visit one of the other 56 states.
    FLORIDA: We've been Gored by the bull of politics and we're Bushed.
    FLORIDA: Relax, Retire, ReVote.
    FLORIDA: Viagra voters do it again!
    FLORIDA: Where your vote counts and counts and counts.
    FLORIDA: This is what you get for taking Elian away from us.
    FLORIDA: We don't just cheat in football.
    FLORIDA: We're number one! Wait! Recount!
    PALM BEACH COUNTY: So nice, we let you vote twice.
    PALM BEACH COUNTY: We put the "duh" in Florida.
    SIGN ON I-95 : Florida this way -> , no wait, the other way...5 miles,'s 10 miles.

    Click Here!