Wetherby (1985) sports a stellar cast including Vanessa Redgrave and Judy Dench. The plot is simple enough. A stranger invites himself to a small dinner party at the home of spinster teacher Redgrave. The next day, he visits her, and blows his brains all over her wall. The rest of the film examines the question, "Why did he do it?" An assortment of characters, including Regrave's lifelong friend, Dench, and her husband, a police investigator, and a rather strange female acquaintance of the deceased all wonder why he did it.
Not that the question struck me as particularly interesting to begin with, especially as I didn't know the character, but I didn't feel like I was any closer to an answer by the time the film ended. So, if the film didn't answer the question, "Why did he do it?", what question did the film answer? It wasn't until I started thinking about how on earth to review this that I found the real question, and point of the film. Either of two questions will get you there.
Why did these characters want to know why he did it?
Why were these characters included in the story?
The answer is the same in both cases. All of them are living unhappy lives, although they appear outwardly content with life. So the real question of the film isn't "Why did he do it?" but rather, "Why don't we do it?" Unfortunately, the film doesn't really answer that either. What is the value in this? Possibly, the film makers are asking us to look inside ourselves, and decide if we are or aren't happy, and figure out what keeps us going.
I feel a little better now that I see a reason for the film to exist, and it is now clear why I didn't relate to it at all. The basic assumption is that most of us are profoundly unhappy just under the surface. At least in my case, that is a totally false assumption.
Joely Richardson, as a young Redgrave, shows a breast, and Suzanna Hamilton, as the trouble young woman, is seen in a t-shirt and panties. IMDb readers have this at 6.7. Dench received a BAFTA nomination for supporting actress. Many critics were enthusiastic. The film is technically competent, but, at least for me, doesn't justify the expenditure of time. C-.
|Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
I was really disappointed by this movie.
I know what you're thinking. I should know better.
After all, I write about movies every day, and I should have
realistic expectations about a movie which stars Richard Gere as
Israel's greatest king.
You got it all wrong, ya mug.
I wasn't disappointed in the sense that it was much
worse than I expected. On the contrary, I was disappointed because
it was better than I expected.
You see, I love really bad movies. I have watched
Road House five times and loved it every time. Plan 9? A classic!
Manos, the Hands of Fate? Genius! Some of my favorite recent movies
include Hell Comes to Frogtown and Harley Davidson and the Marlboro
Man. What could be more fun than a truly inspired bad movie? When I
read about Richard Gere as King David, I was stoked. Before the film
arrived, I was already composing articles in my head. "I have to
write about the worst casting of all time. Gotta do the research."
Thinking for days about John Wayne as Genghis Khan. Mickey Rourke as Francis
of Assisi. Hugh Grant as Lord Byron. Kevin Costner as Robin Hood.
Pipe dreams. All pipe dreams.
This was going to be my Thanksgiving turkey for all of you, and it
let me down.
Gere doesn't give an outrageously bad performance. He
just gives his usual Richard Gere performance, creating a King David
who is breathtakingly handsome and as devoid of personality as the next door neighbors on Ozzie and
Harriet. Gere even managed some kind of heightened articulation so
that, while he didn't sound classical or Shakespearian, neither did
he sound like his usual Philly Guy self, which is what I was hoping
I really thought it was going to be a Tony Curtis kind of
thing. ("Yonda lies da cassel of my brudda!").
I was already dreaming up the punch lines.
It's the only production in which King David is
referred to as 'Dave'.
Dave finds out that the Philistines aren't really
from Philadelphia, and refuses to stay with them any longer because
he can't get a decent cheesesteak sandwich in all of Gath.
No luck. Not a good movie, but not laughably bad.
It's bad, just not bad enough to be consistently funny.
It's just your basic garden-variety boring biblical
thing. Although it lacks flair, it was directed with competence by
Bruce Beresford, who has churned out a whole career full of
similarly competent but uninspired movies like Driving Miss Daisy
and Bride of the Wind. Of course, King Dave is down there near the
bottom of Beresford's credits at IMDb, but with him at the helm the
film is obviously not the complete hack-job I was hoping for. Damn!
- (7.86) -
- (7.35) -
- (7.29) -
Driving Miss Daisy
- (7.05) -
Black Robe (1991)
- (7.05) -
- (6.61) -
Don's Party (1976)
- (6.57) -
Paradise Road (1997)
- (6.44) -
And Starring Pancho
Villa as Himself (2003) (TV)
- (6.37) -
Crimes of the Heart
- (6.32) -
- (6.25) -
Getting of Wisdom,
- (6.14) -
Fringe Dwellers, The
- (5.94) -
Club, The (1980)
- (5.90) -
- (5.85) -
Rich in Love (1993)
- (5.72) -
Last Dance (1996)
- (5.54) -
Silent Fall (1994)
- (5.46) -
Bride of the Wind
- (5.36) -
- (5.32) -
Adventures of Barry
McKenzie, The (1972)
- (5.23) -
Her Alibi (1989)
- (5.23) -
Puberty Blues (1981)
- (4.92) -
King David (1985)
- (4.84) -
Man in Africa, A (1994)
The seemingly interminable story follows King David from his youth
until his death at age seven or eight thousand. Well it seemed that
long. Dave starts out as a humble shepherd boy who writes
some songs and sings them to the sheep. Hey, even Sinatra started
small. Besides, sheep rarely heckle, so they're good for working out
new material. Dave gradually starts singing for smarter animals,
then starts playing a few big rooms, and is eventually singing his Psalms around all
the swankiest hangouts in ancient Israel. As shown here, he's kind
of a biblical crooner with some snappy Catskills patter.
"I accompany my songs with a lyre. I really enjoy a
lyre. That's why Saul is my favorite king. (rim-shot) But I kid.
You've been a lovely audience. I'll be here all week, and don't
forget to tip your waiter."
Yup. Turns out Dave was the Sinatra of his day. In fact the
parallel to Ol' Blue Eyes is shown quite clearly in Dave's
oft-neglected 214th Psalm:
My kind of God
Oh, Yahweh is ...
My kind of God
Oh, Yahweh is ...
My kind of de-i-ty
I know he
Has chosen me
... and each time I roam
that Yahweh is
calling me home
Eventually Dave the Poet becomes The Lord's Anointed, which really
ticks off ol' Saul the King, played by The Equalizer, who likes to
think of himself as the Big Cheese in Zion. The Equalizer does
manage at least some degree of tolerance for the young whelp since
Dave the shepherd-poet turns out to be a helluva warrior as well,
and the kid teams up with The Lord of Hosts to do some serious
smiting of Israel's enemies. They smite the living shit out of a
whole bunch of pagans with tribal names ending in "_ites", like the
Amalekites, Kenites, Jerahmeelites Jezreelites, Carmelites, and
Plebiscites. In fact, for about a decade there, Dave and The Lord
turned the entire Middle East into a massive smite-fest, filled with
constant war and turbulence. Come to think of it, things haven't
changed much since then.
In the interest of accuracy, I should note that Dave
didn't really need to smite the Plebiscites. He just hung out with
them and got them to hold a direct vote on whether to surrender to
OK, that's a stretch. I'm really digging deep into
the vault of obscurity to dream up something funny about this movie.
In truth, there are only two really silly things in
This film probably holds the record for the most
outlandish use of "swooshing" noises. It even tops those Hong Kong
karate films. During the classic Biblical one-on-one confrontation,
Goliath draws one seriously big-ass sword, so big that even the
gigantic guy playing Goliath can barely wield it. Yet when he swings
it slowly and laboriously through the air, obviously struggling with
its heft, the film's sound guy adds some swooshing noises that make
it sound like Goliath is getting more clubhead speed than John Daly
rearing back for a little extra on the 16th tee at Firestone..
Richard Gere disco dances into Jerusalem wearing
nothing but his Depends. Now that I look back on it, my mental
picture of Richard Gere doing the Tony Manero moves in his diapers
does make me smile, but I guess by that point in the film I was not
receptive to the foolishness, since my much anticipated cheesefest
had turned out to be just another long, boring biblical epic.
Based on this description, this is a D. It is
competent, but I just can't imagine any reason to watch this film
except the frontal nudity from Alice Krige. If you're really
interested in the Bible, this interpretation will offer no new
inspiration, and you'll be ticked off by the liberties taken
with the story. If you're not interested in the Bible, it's a
boring two hour voice-over recitation of unfamiliar names. "And
then did he smite Menoch, and Bizzbat, and the Sodomites, and the
Mennonites" ... and so forth.
The Borg Queen (1,
Cherie Lungi (1,
The basic idea is simple. Sociopath gets out of prison. Steals a badge.
Poses as a cop. Steals
from crooks. Gets caught.
The bitch is in the tone. Miami Blues is an offbeat, quirky,
hipper-than-thou crime thriller with macabre elements. This film
sort of played the John the Baptist role for Pulp Fiction. It wasn't
the coming of Tarantino, but it showed what might be ahead if
everyday life were to be juxtaposed with situations that include
darkly comic and graphic violence.
At one point the sociopath is mangled and bleeding
after a major altercation in a convenience store, but before he
leaves he asks the clerk, "Where's the whipping cream?"
That c-store incident will serve to give you a good
idea of the world inhabited by this film, so I'll expand it a bit. A
loser holds up the store with a gun. The sociopath just happens to
be in the store as a customer, sees the robbery about to happen, and
threatens the gunman by menacingly brandishing a jar of spaghetti
sauce. (??!!) The clerk is armed as well. Bullets start flying
everywhere. Windows are shattering. Sauce is splattering. The
would-be robber flees, gets in his pick-up and the situation seems
to be resolved - until the robber comes back by driving his pick-up
through the store's front door, pinning the sociopath under the
shattered glass and metal.
The most interesting complications along the way are:
The sociopath falls in love, at least to the degree
that he is capable. He picks up a simple-minded underage hooker
(Jennifer Jason Leigh) and ends up setting up house with her. She is
so happy with the turn of events that she won't or can't see the
worst elements of his personality.
Fred Ward plays the cop who is tracking down the
sociopath. He is not at all stupid on the investigative side, but is
only marginally capable of the mental toughness necessary for
police work, and he is generally incompetent in every other element
of life. Sloppy and unathletic, he's like a low-rent bachelor version of Inspector Colombo. Since he
works with real criminals instead of genteel rich folks,
this version of Colombo gets beaten up pretty regularly.
Alec Baldwin plays the sociopath. This role is pretty
much his specialty now, but he was just testing it out back in 1990.
Jennifer Jason Leigh plays the vulnerable naïf, and that's her own
specialty. This is just her character from Ridgemont High, minus a
few more IQ points. Fred Ward checks in as the cynical, unsightly
slob of a cop who can solve crimes, but can't seem to bring his
Jennifer Jason Leigh (1,
The lastest version of The A List, a catty and amusing gossip
Trouble in Duketown: Jessica has no sense of humor when it comes
to Knoxville and Stifler
Dick Cheney breaks Saddam's record - Wyoming's election draws 106%
of registered voters
A sequel to The Usual Suspects seems in the offing.
Whatever the hell an offing is.
Here is a new clip from ELEKTRA
- I don't think I'm being too confident in picking this as the
headline of the day already, even though it's only lunch time.
Pickled cats thrown at police.
The trailer for Creep : London, midnight, on a cold
evening. Unable to find a taxi, Kate (Franka Potente) heads for
the Underground. She takes a seat away from the crowd of
late-night revelers and waits for the last train. Before long she
drifts off to sleep and wakes to find everyone gone. She
momentarily panics until another train pulls in. She boards,
unnerved that she's the only passenger, but relieved at last to be
on her way. Halfway through the tunnel the train jerks to a
violent halt. The lights shut off and the train is plunged into
darkness. Then Rod Serling appears on the tracks, puffing on a
Lucky Strike and pontificating mysteriously about one thing or
The U.K. dedicates a war memorial to glow worms.
Because they were not just any glow worms, but really feisty and
courageous little anti-German glow worms, dammit! Without them,
we'd have dropped the Big One to Kaiser Bill, old chap. Besides,
you have to give worms a memorial stone, because you'd kill 'em if
you pinned a medal on 'em. Of course, to be practical for a
second, you could attach the medal to some eight pound test line,
pin the medal on them, then use 'em for bait.
Secretary of State Colin Powell on Wednesday said the United
States does not accept the results of Ukraine's presidential
elections as legitimate, citing 'credible reports of fraud and
abuse.' Then he kissed them on both cheeks and welcomed
them to the team.
Worst reality TV idea ever?: "Jayne Torvill and
Christopher Dean are to front a new reality show - on ice."
The Playboy empire comes under fire in a thinly veiled
fictionalized memoir to be published later this month.
Divini Rae Sorenson, Playmate of November 2003, writes of
mandatory orgies, drugging, molestation and other sordid details
of life at a place which really sounds a lot like the Mansion.
Mountain Dew Pitch Black turns your poop green.
Apparently the only known antidote is plenty of original Mountain
Dew Green, which will turn your poop black again. The
black-to-green-to-black-to-green human shit paradigm, commonly
called The Porcelain Riddle, is one of life's long unsolved
mysteries, comparable to the Mudd's Robots Paradox. Frankly, I'm
not sure whether this is true, but I'm damn sure that I'm not
going to test it personally. You guys drink all that Pitch Black
crap and tell me how it comes out. So to speak.
Holy shit, the Matrix was a true story!
- How many Hungarian blondes do you need to screw in a light
Hungary to outlaw blonde jokes? "People are banned from
discriminating against Jews, or blacks, so why not grant blondes
the same protection?" So if they pass that law, and all the
Gypsies dye their hair, discrimination should disappear from
Hungary forever. As for me, I didn't even know Hungarians had a
sense of humor, but I guess they must. Except for the blonde ones.
Paris Pics To Appear In Hustler? Enticing headline,
boring story behind it.
Movie Juice calls Alexander - Chariots of Fire Island.
"What's with Colin Farrell's bad dye job? Before Alexander
conquered half the world he evidently conquered half the world's
supply of L'Oréal, various Southern California beaches, and a
number of David Lee Roth videos."
The net is buzzing with rumours that Google is working on a web
MSIE's browser market share drops below 90 for the first time in
Conservatives struggle to gerrymander the renegade 9th Circuit
Court out of existence
First look at Fat Actress, the Kirstie Alley reality series on
X-Men producer discusses X-3, Wolverine, and even Wolverine 2
An exclusive sneak peek at the new MTV series Who Wants To Be A
Comic Book Hero?
Colts to wear their '56 uniforms on Thanksgiving Day
Does taking the time out and making the kicker think about his
field goal attempt for an extra two minutes alter his probability
of success? Statisticians analyze this in the current
issue of Chance.
Norwegian jailed for sexual harassment scam. A
20-year-old man posed as four different women in Internet chat
rooms in order to dupe unsuspecting men into embarrassing the real
White House Thanksgiving Turkey Detained Without Counsel.
Vintage Playmate Gallery from 1970 - Carol Imhof - Courtesy of
Four free short vids from SPICE TV RAW!
BLUES SINGER SUES SHRINK FOR MAKING HIM FEEL HAPPIER.
Funny idea. Given America's litigiousness, it probably could
Watch the trailer for Kevin Spacey's Bobby Darin movie, Beyond the
Sea. That is Spacey singing, not Darin. Helluva great
piece of mimicry.
The trailer for High Tension, an upcoming horror film.
Walt Disney Pictures has set Robert Downey Jr. to join Tim Allen
in 'The Shaggy Dog', the Brian Robbins-directed comic
remake about a man who occasionally changes into a sheepdog.
Dave Barry's Blog discusses "getting rats drink for science".
Dave points out, "THE WORST PART IS WHEN THEY START SINGING IRISH
FOLK SONGS", or maybe that "Jeremiah was a Bullfrog" song.
Watch the trailer premiere for 'The Interpreter,'
starring Nicole Kidman as a UN interpreter who overhears an
assassination plot and Sean Penn as an FBI agent assigned to
The trailer and several clips from The Assassination of Richard
Nixon: "Set during the 1970s, 'Nixon' centers on the
true story of Philadelphia furniture salesman Sam Byck (Penn), who
hatches a plot to kill Richard Nixon after Byck's attempts to live
out the American dream are dashed. Byck had planned to hijack a
commuter flight in Atlanta and crash the airliner into the White
The Borowitz Report: "NBA BANS FANS"
Paris Hilton inspires South Park: When a Paris Hilton
video playset becomes a hot item among the fourth-grade girls at
the elementary school, Paris visits the school to compete in a
Spyware Warrior: Rogue/Suspect Anti-Spyware Products & Web Sites
- Britain mourns as
Victoria Beckham gives up her singing career.
"Farrell's Alexander looks like a Babylonian hooker after a busy
- The Onion:
Swift Boat Veterans Still Hounding Kerry: "At the
center of the group's efforts is a $1.8 million television ad
campaign that includes spots questioning Kerry's ability to make
quick decisions in a fast-food line, leave adequate distance
between his car and the next in heavy traffic, and take proper
care of his lawn." One ad claims Kerry wore street shoes on the
lanes at a local bowling alley!!
A collection of video Bushisms.
Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the
since it's sorta in real time.
to submit a URL for Other Crap
are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the
review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that
there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written
by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too
ashamed to admit it.
Words from Scoop.
.avi's from Shiloh.
.wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.
NOTE: because of a unique combination of
circumstances with the Windows media player and some substantial
bandwidth theft, we will have to do all of our movie files in zip
format. Left click on the files as you normally would to view a
you get a choice, click on "save", and put it on your hard drive in
the directory of your choice. UnZIP and play from there.
I know this is not especially convenient, but it
allows the film clips to continue. I can protect .zip files from
hot-linking in the same way I can protect still images. For some
reason, if I protect .avis and .wmvs from hot-linking, they will not
play in the Windows media player, and I can't get a satisfactory
work-around. Perhaps I will find a better solution, but for now this
new policy allows you to continue getting the movie clips you want
to see, which is much preferable to my abandoning the clips
Single White Female (2004) - part
Tuna and I
have discussed this before.
Lots o' nudity from JJL and Bridget Fonda. Here's
the third installment. See the JJL clips in Monday's and Tuesday's
Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble
with the codecs for these movies:
FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use
DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use
virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the
vids says the video codec: DivX Decoder Filter & audio
codec: Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with.
When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG
Layer-3. A friend of mine told me about compressing the
audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been
capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this
info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp &
asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using
camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could
never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost
too much to buy in my opinion.
A reader says:
You mentioned that some users were
having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool
designed to determine what codec is needed for a video.
http://www.headbands.com/gspot/ Hope this is useful to you
or your users.
I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9.
The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in
the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly
larger, and slightly lower quality.
Words, pictures, and vids from
1984 - (1984 - when else?) - part
Hello Scoopy !
Bush lovers will most likely find these clips a treat.
talking politics here but am referring to the film "1984" starring
John Hurt and Suzanna Hamilton. The film is of course
an adaptation of George Orwell's grim but surprisingly accurate
vision of the future written back in 1948, and I must say that the
film is even more depressing than the book. Suzanna Hamilton plays
the female lead role and back in 1984 audiences raised their
eyebrows when she showed her pubes and, by doing so, managed to
get her name noticed. See, it was a gigantic bush even by the
standards of those days, so how must this look to some of
today's people who adhere to the no pubes rule aka. the little
Anyway, here are five out of ten clips. The next five will
NOTE: We currently have to do all of our movie files in zip format. Instead of viewing them online, save the zip files to your hard drive in the directory of your choice, un-zip and play from there.
First up from the Ghost today...
A few 'clips from the late night flick "Virtual Girl" (1998).
Charlie Curtis is the 'Virtual girl' and is topless in a couple of very slow moving love scenes. There are a few quick glimpses of partial rear views, but mostly the camera keeps everything below the waist just out of sight. Some trivia...according to the IMDb, Curtis was the stunt babe and stand-in for Liv Tyler in "Armageddon" (1998).
- Charlie Curtis zipped .wmvs.
Being a "Virtual Girl" allows her to change bodies during the same love scene. So what does that mean for us? 3 more girls all riding the same dude.
- Assorted other virtual girls (zipped .wmvs)
Miche Straube is a real world girl, and we see her topless in a shower scene. Oddly enough, in her only other IMDb credit, "Meatballs 4", she is listed as "Shower Girl".
Next up from the Ghost....
Maurine Logan briefly bares breasts and pubes in scenes from the 1989 movie "Blood Red", starring Eric Roberts, Dennis Hopper and Michael Madsen.
'Caps and comments by Dann:
The second half of my effort to add Jennifer Lopez's nude films to my collection (and she's done only two, to my knowledge), is Oliver Stone's 1997 weirdo crime thriller U Turn, arguably better than her 1995 effort in Money Train because she showed more, but more importantly the role was much better, and personally I think her performance was too.
A guy gets stuck in a desert town (frequently called a shithole in the movie for obvious reasons) when his radiator hose breaks. He's on the run from some bad guys to whom he owes a lot of money.
Things get crazy when he gets involved with a beautiful young woman who wants to get away from her older husband, who was also her stepfather before mommy died. Things get nuttier still when the husband decides the stranger might be a good prospect to kill his cheating young wife for the insurance money. Throw in a wacky and crooked mechanic who keeps raising the repair price daily, a local lawman looking for trouble, and other assorted weirdos, and you've got a really cool, never boring, twists-at-every-turn flick.
Not one of Stone's best, the critics claim, but a damned good movie nevertheless. I really enjoyed it.
||The German actress showing off a rather large breast in a scene featuring a side/rear view from a recent episode of "Alarm für Cobra 11".
||We see breasts and a hint of pubes as well behind a mostly see-thru shower curtain. Scenes from the German movie "Nikolaikirche" (1995).
||The French-Canadian actress bares a breast in a scene from 1984's "Heartbreakers".
||Full frontal nudity in an early 80's German TV production of "A Midsummer Night's Dream".
||Full frontal nudity in "Moabiter Venus: Ingrid Steeger" (1971).
||Here's a sneak peek at the "Lost in Translation" star showing partial breast exposure in a scene from the upcoming Travolta movie, "A Love Song for Bobby Long".
The exposure...A side view with Scarlett partially wrapped in a sheet while covering a breast with her hand.
The movie...all I know is it's played a few film festivals, and it will be in NY and LA late in December. I guess they think they have a chance for some Oscar nominations. There is a website for the film, but it doesn't offer any more info.
|Rue bares her extra-larer big'uns in a scene from "Gypsy 83" (2001). You may recognize Rue from her current show on ABC, "Less Than Perfect". By the way, "Less Than Perfect" has one of, if no the most unusual cast on television. It stars Andy Dick, Will Sasso (from "Mad TV"), Patrick Warburton (Puddy from "Seinfeld") and Fun House hero Eric Roberts!
Jennifer Jason Leigh
|Mr. Nude Celeb takes a look at the 80's classic "Fast Times at Ridgemont High" (1982). Cates' nude scene is still one of the most famous in nude cinema history. But let's not forget that Leigh was also young and nekkid.
|Señor Skin 'caps of the "Soul Food" co-star topless and making out with Jessica Collins in scenes from the made for Showtime movie "The Ranch".
|Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
Pat's comments in yellow...
BRUCE WILLIS SUES OVER FILM INJURY
Tears Of The Crybaby - Bruce Willis is suing the makers of his movie "Tears
of the Sun," claiming a simulated spray of bullets caused a projectile to
scratch his forehead. He's seeking unspecified damages, claiming he was
exposed to "ultrahazardous activity" and experienced "extreme mental,
physical and emotional pain and suffering." So did the producers: the
movie cost $110 million and grossed only $86 million worldwide.
Maybe they should call it even.
When they saw the receipts, a bullet in the forehead sounded pretty good
How did a tiny forehead scratch cause such extensive brain damage?
Perhaps the next "Die Hard" movie should be called "Cry Hard."
POSH SPICE GIVES UP ON SINGING
Something New To Give Thanks For - After several flop tries at a solo
career, Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham announced that she'll concentrate on
fashion design and give up singing. She said, "The industry is not what it
used to be," and "I know I could never become the best singer in the
Really?! Oh, come now!
Or, for that matter, any kind of singer.
Or become 10 years younger.
At least she had a record contract, and the best singer in the world
probably couldn't get one of those.
"CHRIST" MAKES OSCAR VOTERS CROSS
The Word "Christ" Was Heard Repeatedly - Mel Gibson will offer free
screenings and DVDs of "The Passion of the Christ" for Oscar voters, but he
won't launch an expensive ad campaign. He said that's not what the film is
about; it should be judged on artistic merits; and he'll rely on faith. He
may need it: a spy at GoldDerby.com reports that at one screening for
Hollywood insiders, the film prompted "the angriest audience response I've
ever seen," and "the most filthy cussing and swearing that's ever been
heard at an Academy Awards screening."
But that's only because they knew Bush voters loved it.
They figure that's what Jesus would do, if He were them.
That's all right...Mel forgives them.
They hadn't sat through so much cinematic torture since "Gigli."
But without an ad in Variety, how will people in Hollywood ever learn
who "Jesus" is?