The Rapture (1991) was covered recently by Scoopy. If you haven't read his review, this would be a real good time to do so. As a quick recap, the first act portrays a woman who is a bored information assistance operator by day, and an unhappy swinger at night. In act two, she accepts Jesus as her personal lord and savior, gets married and has a child. Act three is the kicker, where her husband is killed, and she becomes convinced that God has called her to the rapture at a remote desert location. She takes her daughter, and waits for God, who is a no show.
Up to this point, the story seems grounded in a specific reality, namely, a lost soul who becomes a born again Christian. IS that interesting? I have to believe that anyone interested in the subject has had ample opportunity to learn all about it before now, so I will have to say no. The swinging of act one is much to mild to have an erotic entertainment value. The main character is neither remarkable enough, or strange enough to help generate interest and make us care about her.
In act three, they do an amazing job of pissing off every possible viewer. They shoot the daughter so she can be with God, then the end of the world does occur, but too late for our main character, as she no longer loves God, seeing him as way too cruel. She declines an eternity in heaven rather than change her mind. So, we kill a kid on camera, which has to upset a lot of people. Then, we say that Christianity has it right, and everything they preach is true, which should anger all non-Christians. Finally, we say that God is such an asshole that even a former believer will pass up an eternity in heaven to kiss his ass, and hence piss off the Christians as well.
We have breasts from Mimi Rogers and Stephanie Menuez, and breasts and buns from Carol Davis.
Ebert, along with many other critics, was enthusiastic about it. Opening weekend box-office was strong, but the Thomas-Hill hearings, then the National League playoffs and the World Series killed the rest of the run. Is it enjoyable? I don't see how. It is bold, different, and act three is in no way predictable. For me, it was two acts of hohum, followed by one long "you have got to be kidding me." Yet, there is much to think about and talk about here. In the final analysis, I expect many of you should see it, but I doubt that many would willingly watch it twice. This is a C-. It is technically a decent effort, and they did brig their vision to the screen, Whether or not you will feel enriched for having watched it is completely up to you.
|Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
FHMUS.com - Leeann Tweeden ("The Best Damn Sports Show Period")
interview and slide show.
Film Threat's annual list of the 50 LEAST intriguing people in
Hollywood. "These are the least powerful,
least-inspiring, least-intriguing people in Hollywood."
- The top (bottom?) 10 were: 10. Ben Affleck 9. Paris Hilton
8. Jimmy Fallon 7. Reese Witherspoon 5-6. Ben Stiller and Owen
Wilson 4. M. Night Shyamalan 3. Michael Eisner 2. Halle Berry 1.
Computers as Authors? Literary Luddites Unite! You will
be surprised by the quality of what the computer has written.
Caller ID Spoofing - for everyone.
The best place to find porn in Akron? Public access TV.
- "Claiming that he has suffered 'substantial injuries'--both
mental and physical--as a result of a movie set accident,
Bruce Willis has filed a negligence lawsuit against a major
American Social Hygiene Posters 1910-70
- The ultimate Christmas gift,
the Donner Party Snow Globe.
Funniest Commercials of the Year
Superhero Hype! has the first official picture of Doctor Doom in
the FF movie.
ESPN.com makes its annual Thanksgiving picks - The Biggest Turkeys
of 2004. Artest kind of swept the competition away at
the last minute.
Oliver Stone could face legal action from Greek lawyers for
portraying the Greek hero Alexander the Great as gay.
According to them, "There is no mention of his alleged
homosexuality in any historical document or archive."
DEAL ESTABLISHES STAND-ALONE NATIONAL COLLEGE FOOTBALL
New Porn Star One of America's Most Wanted.
DreamWorks is moving forward to give Puss-in-Boots, the
sword-wielding cat voiced by Antonio Banderas in SHREK 2, his own
MovieJuice! reviews National Treasure: "The only thing
worse than dumb is dumb and boring. And National Treasure is worse
The parliamentary motion to impeach Tony Blair for 'gross
misconduct' over the war against Iraq will be published next
Follow up - what was up with that Target ad about Anal Massage?
This is NOT the correct way to pull a car from the water.
Fort Lauderdale man catches 582-pound hammerhead shark on a rod
and reel. He caught it within a few hundred yards of a
swimming beach on South Beach. With video.
Pictures from Ocean's 12
'I wonder if my breasts could work like sponges?' - and art was
born - sorta.
"Man, they got everything in D.C. Good theater. Unprotected
Presidents. The works." John Wilkes Booth letter from
1865 sold for $68,000.
'All the King's Men" casting notes. The cast of this
movie now includes Anthony Hopkins, Patricia Clarkson, James
Gandolfini, Sean Penn, Jude Law, Kate Winslet and Mark Ruffalo.
Jim Carrey has opened up about his long-running battle with
depression, describing it as a 'low level of despair'."
FRANCE PROCLAIMS BODY ODOR A NATIONAL TREASURE.
Playmate Gallery - Karen McDougal - December 1997 Courtesy of
Four free short videos from Playboy's Twins & Sisters!
Life Imitates Satire: Sometimes Reality Has the Last Laugh.
False headlines that came true or came close.
The trailer from The Aryan Couple: "The wealthy, Jewish
Krauzenbergs, desperate to save their Hungarian family, make a
deal and the Reichsfuhrer Heinrich Himmler has decided to visit
them in person to guarantee them safe passage to Palestine and to
ensure the smooth transfer of all they own to his possession. They
will be joined at a dinner by 'the devil himself', none other than
Adolph Eichmann, The "Aryan couple" are the family servants, who
have a few secrets of their own.
Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the
since it's sorta in real time.
to submit a URL for Other Crap
are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the
review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that
there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written
by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too
ashamed to admit it.
Words from Scoop.
.avi's from Shiloh.
.wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.
NOTE: because of a unique combination of
circumstances with the Windows media player and some substantial
bandwidth theft, we will have to do all of our movie files in zip
format. Left click on the files as you normally would to view a
you get a choice, click on "save", and put it on your hard drive in
the directory of your choice. UnZIP and play from there.
I know this is not especially convenient, but it
allows the film clips to continue. I can protect .zip files from
hot-linking in the same way I can protect still images. For some
reason, if I protect .avis and .wmvs from hot-linking, they will not
play in the Windows media player, and I can't get a satisfactory
work-around. Perhaps I will find a better solution, but for now this
new policy allows you to continue getting the movie clips you want
to see, which is much preferable to my abandoning the clips
Single White Female (2004)
Tuna and I
have discussed this before.
Lots o' nudity from JJL and Bridget Fonda. Here's
the second installment. See the other JJL clips in yesterday's
Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble
with the codecs for these movies:
FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use
DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use
virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the
vids says the video codec: DivX Decoder Filter & audio
codec: Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with.
When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG
Layer-3. A friend of mine told me about compressing the
audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been
capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this
info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp &
asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using
camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could
never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost
too much to buy in my opinion.
A reader says:
You mentioned that some users were
having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool
designed to determine what codec is needed for a video.
http://www.headbands.com/gspot/ Hope this is useful to you
or your users.
I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9.
The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in
the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly
larger, and slightly lower quality.
Words, pictures, and vids from
Gazon maudit - (1995) - part 1
Hi Scoopy !
This time we'll take a look at all the nudity from the French
comedy "Gazon maudit" (1995), starring Victoria Abril. As usual
Victoria isn't very shy about her body (check the huge volume in
the Encyclopedia), so there are ten clips in all. Today I'm
sending along the first five, the other five will follow tomorrow.
I thought some scenes didn't deserve to be cut short, so some
clips contain little nudity by Abril while others also feature
mild nudity from co-stars Josiane Balasko and full male nudity by
That's it for today.
Some brand new Euro-Goodies from LC!
Next up, scemes from the French comdey "Les Textiles". It was released in France and Italy over the summer, and is also not available on home video.
- Angélique Thomas looking fantastic topless and full frontal at the beach.
- Barbara Schulz she's the one with the serious pokies and soaking wet t-shirt.
- Magali Muxart very tan and showing all 3 B's
'Caps and comments by Oz:
"Boyz N The Hood"
Boyz N The Hood is a story about black gang warfare in America. There are topless views of Nia Long and Leonette Scott's characters, but both are most likely body doubles.
"Return to Horror High"
Return to Horror High is a confusing teenage horror movie, confusing because it jumps around time-wise and you never know what's real and what's not. Plenty of topless ladies including Alison Noble, Joy Heston, Darcy DeMoss and some unknowns. Kristi Somers and Lori Lethin add some eye candy.
There's a brief flash of breast from an unidentified woman, which is the only nudity. Marilu Henner shows a lot of her breasts, but still only a partial views. Koko Tani and Kristine DeBell are also very easy on the eyes.
No nudity in the dull Alien Hunter but some nice outfits worn by Janine Eser and Leslie Stefanson.
"The Joy of Sex"
Some unknowns give a brief show of breast in The Joy of Sex. Michelle Meyrink and Lisa Langlois look sexy.
"Red Rock West"
Lara Flynn Boyle is down to her underwear in Red Rock West.
|Two of the "Desparate Housewives" looking showing a little skin. The ulta-gorgeous Longoria is in her undies again, this time in a very oddly lit scene featuring her lying in bed, and then getting up. Hatcher wears a form fitting top and does a little dance before trying to ride a mechanical bull.
||Thanks to Squiddy for this great image of the supermodel and actress wearing a see-thru top on the runway!
Joey Lauren Adams
|Señor Skin takes a look at Kevin Smith's second Askewniverse film, "Mallrats" (1995). For Smith fans there seems to be a love it or hate it reaction to this flick. It has some very funny bits, but they are kinda lost in between fart jokes and fanboy comic book love. Overall, it's a decent second film.
|Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
Pat's comments in yellow...
HOOTERS LAWSUIT BEGINS
Hard Knocks - In Orlando, Florida, a trial has begun in which Hooters is
claiming it owns the copyright on using scantily-clad women to sell food
and beer. They say Ker's WingHouse stole their concept, including
waitresses, menu design, calendars and traffic signs reading "Double
Curves" and "Caution: Blonde Thinking." Ker's owner claims it's based on a
restaurant he used to own called "Knockers," and that Hooters is just
afraid of competition. But Hooters' lawyer said they're defending their
"intellectual property rights," and "the Hooter Girl is our Ronald
Except she wears more makeup.
But you'll never see a grimace at Hooter's.
That's the first time the words "intellectual" and "Hooter Girl" have
been used in the same sentence.
It took some major intellectual brainwork to think of using
scantily-clad women to sell beer.
Next, they'll sue Cinnabuns for stealing their idea of marketing hot,
HEIRESS PAID ROOMIE TO DO HER COLLEGE WORK
Princesses Are Falling - ABC's "20/20" reports that Wal-Mart heiress Paige
Laurie, granddaughter of one of the founders, is clueless about how the
average Americans who made her rich live. Her ex-roommate at the
University of Southern California, Elena Martinez, had to drop out because
she couldn't afford tuition. So she says Laurie paid her $20,000 to do all
her homework and papers so she could go to parties every night like Paris
Hilton. Laurie sometimes berated her for making typos. Laurie's parents
were so proud of her graduation, they gave $2 billion to the University of
Missouri for a stadium and demanded it be named in her honor.
And it was: "Cheating Bitch Stadium."
At least now that she has that diploma, she should go far!
STUDENTS SUSPENDED FOR BREATHING HELIUM
Burst Their Balloon - Two high school students who were putting up balloons
for a dance in Gilbert, Arizona, inhaled a little helium so they could talk
in squeaky voices and get a laugh. The principal suspended them for five
days for violating the zero-tolerance policy on the non-medical use of
inhalants. She did later reduce it to one day.
After their lawyer argued that laughter is the best medicine.
But she reminded them that there is also a zero tolerance policy on
This school is so strict, not even your voice is allowed to get high.