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Thursday
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Worst Things
To Hear During Your Tourist Visit to a Nuclear
Power Plant
- All of our
employees passed a rigorous civil service
test to get these jobs.
- Fission,
shmission!
- Relax.
I'll increase the water level after my
coffee break.
- Was that
"Open valve A and close valve
B" or was it the other way round?
- This whole
plant will be running under Win95
tomorrow.
- Who forgot
to pay the water bill?
- We got 12
seconds to WHAT????
- No
problem. A little duct tape, and that
leak is history.
- It's
Russian technology.
- Sniff,
sniff.... you smell that?
- All the
way to the RIGHT, not the LEFT.
- How come
all the big shots are leaving?
- Is that a
"60 Minutes" film crew out
there?
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Catch of
the day
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Howdy, y'all.
Scoopy Jr is on the road, and I, your
elderly Uncle, will be your compere for a
few extra issues this week. Warning: this
will reduce your Buffy and Denise
Richards intake, so you may need vitamin
supplements. This first picture is
Katherine Ross in "The Stepford
Wives". If you could go back 30
years in time, you would predict her for
film superstardom. She did The Graduate
and Butch Cassidy within two years, and
was the hottest ticket in the country. It
just didn't work out the way it started.
Now she's (gasp!) 57, and her only role
in the last 7 years was as the chilly and
creepy aunt in the obscure "Home
Before Dark". Darned if I know what
went wrong. I suspect she's not too sure,
herself. Here she is in some see-through
lingerie in "The Stepford
Wives", wearing prosthetic breasts
(sorry). Vidcaps by Hugo, who is getting
better at it every day.
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If you have
given up on compacts, and like your women
full-sized. Scanman has a treat for you.
Here is Anna Nicole Smith in
"Skyscraper". Nice work, as
always, from ScanMan
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ANS in
"Skyscraper". Both Anna and the
movie were undeservedly snubbed by the
snooty Oscar nominating crowd. The promo
"Eighty-six floors of action-packed
terror!"
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ANS in
"Skyscraper". IMDb viewers gave
this movie an average score of 4.3 out of
10. "Plan 9 From Outer Space"
rates 4.4
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ANS in
"Skyscraper. Today's pointless rant.
As I was updating the seemingly endless
Volume B TODAY, I ran across rthe word
"mauve". It struck me that I
have been on this planet for all too many
years, and have never, not once, heard
this word pronounced correctly by any
English speaker. (The French get it
right, of course, even when speaking
English). The word rhymes with
"grove". Everyone pronounces it
"mawv". I guess my question
is... if everyone pronounces a word a
certain way, shouldn't the dictionary
change to reflect that?
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Kathleen
Turner. "A Breed Apart". New
collage by Graphics Response. That pretty
much says it all.
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Rarely-seen
views of Drew Barrymore in
"Doppelganger". Caps by CHID.
Hey, Chud.... you send me your work ...
do you have a website for me to mention?
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The latest
wrestling babe, Debra McMichael, from
RAW. caps by Crow (as if I had to tell
you) Plenty of the boobs-and-nipples
formula that wrestling works so
effectively.
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Germanathon
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Arthur Figgis
must have joined Graphics Response in
Insomniacs Anonymous this week, because
he churned out all this material since my
Monday page. He is doing his best to make
sure that we stay caught up on the
nuances of German TV. First up, a few
from "Die Entfernung zwischen dir
und mir und ihr" (More or less:
"The distance between you, me, and
her"). Our girl is Kirsten Block. If
you like muscular legs, here's your girl.
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Kirsten Block
#2.
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Kirsten Block
#3. She's a gorgeous woman.
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more from
Figgis. Isabel Gerschke in
"Crashkids".
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more from
Figgis. Hot off the presses. Karoline
Eichhorn in "Gegen Ende der
Nacht". ("Towards the end of
the Evening", more or less). This
role won her this year's RTL Golden Lion
for best actress in a TV film. This is
not exactly equivalent to a Nobel Prize
in significance, but she did finish
first, mind you.
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more from
Figgis. Natasha Richardson in "Past
Midnight". Hey, she isn't German.
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one more of
Natasha
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more Figgis:
Barbara Auer in "Der Boss aus dem
Westen". (self-explanatory
translation) This one is about 10 years
old.
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More Figgis:
Alexandra Kamp in "Ich Liebe eine
Hure". ("I Love a Whore")
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more of Kamp
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more of Kamp
.
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It's hooker
theme week on German TV. Here's Susanna
Simon from "Die Heilige Hure"
(Let's see, how can we get the flavor of
this into English .... "The Holy
Hooker", "The Saintly
Slut", "The Pure
Prostitute" ... something like
that), another 1998 TV Film .
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one more of
Susanna in that movie.
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Now Susanna
is a busy gal. Slartibartfast also capped
her in 1997's "Zur Zeit zu
Zweit". It's a tongue-twister, that
one. (Something like "In our time as
a couple"). In how many languages
can you string four consecutive Z words?
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Slartibartfast
again. Susanna Simon in "Zur
Zeit"
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Slartibartfast
again. Natalia Woerner, also in "Zur
Zeit .
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Slartibartfast
again. Nadja Uhl "Zerissene
Herzen". ("Shattered
Hearts" or "Broken
Hearts". take your pick). Very clear
caps
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Here's a few
from AP. Barbara Schulz in "Und
Tschuess". This is a TV series. I
didn't know Schulz was in it
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AP.
Christiane Paul in
"Workaholic". Body paint.
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AP.
Christiane Paul in
"Workaholic".
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AP.
Christiane Paul in "Workaholic"
.
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Bridget
Hall
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Posed topless
shot. This one has been around a while. I
guess Bridget is a supermodel. I'm not
sure exactly where one draws the line
between supermodels and models. This
problem didn't exist in my day. We had
models and we had Superman, and we never
got them confused, except for that one
time when Lex Luthor used Pink Kryptonite
on Superman, and I don't want to think
about that.
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Bonus
gallery from Cougar
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Cougar just
took up vidcapping, and sent us his first
efforts. They are pretty good, and they
represent some material rarely seen, but
unfortunately, NO FLESH! But there's room
for lots of different stuff here, and
this is cool. The unused alternate ending
to Austin Powers. Features Ms Hurley in a
bikini on a lifeboat. I've never seen it
before. Really good caps for a first-time
effort.
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Nice...
Hurley in a t-shirt and panties in
"Dangerous Ground".
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Minnie
Driver, "Circle of Friends".
Lots of cleavage. Strangely, in these
caps, Minnie looks like a curly-haired
version of Ingrid Bergman.
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more of the
above.
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more.
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more.
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the last
Minnie.
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