I'm taking some "working vacation," which means I'm still at my
desk, but only 6-8 hours a day instead of 16. So I should be here with
Kindergartner shows up with 8 bags of heroin
Proposed Ohio law would ban smoking in cars.
ESPN Top 10 Knockouts
The Return of the King - Burger King is resurrecting a
dubious icon. Why?
Conan reviews the latest commemorative stamps
Nine clips from In the Mix, Usher's movie.
11 clips from Just Friends
Six clips from The Ice Harvest, a new thriller with
John Cusack and Billy Bob Thornton
Ten clips from the musical, Rent
Matthew McConaughey has been named the 'sexiest man alive'
by People magazine.
"MARTHA BEGS TO RETURN TO PRISON ... in Desperate Bid
to Boost Sagging Stock Price"
Jon Stewart interviews Martha Stewart
Colbert Report: Testosterone
- What are you gonna do with those 70 virgins, paint
their toenails? What a waste.
Colbert Report: The Orient.
- "Out-vomiting your dad might have made you a legend
at Skull and Bones, but, sir, it's bad diplomacy."
Colbert talks to Reverend Al
"It seems the terrorist strategy of winning over the
Islamic world by blowing it up is backfiring."
Jon Stewart talks to Rosario Dawson
The Daily Show's Lewis Black talks about last week's
Another 9/11 movie in the works ... starring Adam Sandler.
(Not a comedy. Obviously. I hope.)
Southern hockey teams drawing just as well as traditional
Actress Brooke Burns Hospitalized - broke a neck bone
diving into a pool.
U.S. to retain oversight of Web
"PLUS-SIZED ATHLETES COMPETE IN 'BIG' GAMES" (Weekly
Letterman's "Top Ten Least Amazing Inventions"
Hiding the Ball in Presidential Interviews: How the
Liberal Media Can Finally Ask the Questions They're Dying
If Dr. Seuss wrote for Star Trek: The Next Generation
Jennifer Aniston is demurely topless on one of the
alternate GQ covers (Just wait a sec, Vince Vaughn
will disappear, and Aniston's breast will be on your
Ah, if only Gaston Leroux were still alive!
Toilet-disposed mobile phones menace Helsinki's sewers.
In the Broadway adaptation, Andrew Lloyd Webber's songs
will be heard entirely on ringtones.
"Police probing goat's head found near middle school"
Jessica Alba on the set of "Awake" (x36) (Sorry, fully
Daniel Radcliffe has confirmed he will continue to play
Harry Potter in all seven films, including the final
as-yet-unwritten installment, Harry Potter and the
Ashes of 'Star Trek' actor grounded by dud rocket
Popular Science's "Best of What's New" in 2005
Colbert's "Un-American news"
Colbert defends his behavior on a bootlegged satellite
MICK JAGGER and WARREN BEATTY have been ruled out as the
inspiration for CARLY SIMON's hit single YOU'RE SO VAIN.
Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format.
Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.
"The Big Bounce"
The Big Bounce (1969) is the original film based on the Elmore Leonard novel, that was remade in 2004. This one stars Ryan O'Neal, with newcomer Leigh Taylor-Young as the temptress. While the two films have many of the same characters, they are entirely different films. In the remake, the caper is the story. In the original, the story is all about Ryan O'Neal's character. It takes place somewhere in California. The film opens with O'Neal working in a migrant picker's camp, and hitting his foreman in the face with a baseball bat during a soft ball game argument.
He is released by the judge, who hires him as handy man at his beach side motel. The Taylor-Young character is the mistress of the owner of the pickle farm he was working for. She is out for thrills, and, when she discovers he had a B & E record, decided he would be her new thrill provider. She tries to enlist his aid in stealing money from her boss/lover.
Much of this story is simply not logical. I saw no good reason for the judge to release O'Neal at all, and the ending was most unsatisfactory, and came out of left field. Clearly, this was a good film to remake, and most, if not all of the changes were for the better. The one exception was the nudity. Leigh Taylor-Young is naked in several scenes, including full frontal and rear, and some of it in broad daylight.
IMDb readers have this at 4.6 of 10, but with only 67 votes. The film was technically competent, and the acting was fine. It was the writing that failed. This is a C-, a competently made drama with a weak plot.
"For Your Height Only" and "Challenge of the Tiger"
For Your Height Only/Challenge of the Tiger (1979/1985) -- The entertainment bargain of the decade has been released on DVD. First is a remastered version of For Your Height Only -- He's Tough, He's Tender, He's Three Feet Tall. For those who don't remember Scoopy's review a couple of years ago when I discovered this gem, it is a Bond spoof starring Weng Weng as secret agent 00, a Philippine midget under three feet tall, and the shortest person to ever star in a film. There is no good source material for this cult classic, but Mondo Macabro improved both audio and video making this far better than the version long since out of print. Of course this film has no nudity, and the dubbing is typical of low budget Philippine film, but Weng Weng is sure to charm you, making this one of the best "so bad it's good" films of all time.
Challenge of the tiger is a Bruce Le film, attempting to become the next Bruce Lee after Lee's untimely death. Le costars with Richard Harrison as CIA agents, out to recover the formula that has the power to render all males sterile. A crime syndicate has the formula, which they intend to sell to the highest bidder, and the Vietcong , who can't afford to bid against other interested parties decide to steal it.
While Le is a young martial arts wiz, Harrison is a ladies man. In the opening sequence, we see Harrison at home with three topless women. This is easily the best gratuitous nudity from unknown actresses I have ever seen. He is met at the gate by two topless women. Cut to a slow motion topless tennis match, and a topless ball girl. Please. someone make a clip of this scene. You wouldn't believe what a generous set of breasts do playing topless tennis. As if that weren't enough, another of the women runs and jumps into the pool stark naked, while the tennis player showers. Finally, the four are lounging when the phone call comes for Harrison.
The plot requires paying close attention, especially as there is an awful lot of nudity and martial arts to distract you from following it. Harrison has sex with both the syndicate moll Sharon Schirra and the Vietcong spy May Wong. WOng shows breasts and buns, and Schirra shows all three Bs.
I will leave the joy of following the plot to its inevitable showdowns to you. This double feature release is the perfect gift for all bad movie fans on your holiday list. I have already ordered a copy for a gift. For your Height Only is bad movie genre, but is so entertaining, I will give it a B-. Challenge of the Tiger is a C- as a martial arts film, but with amazing nudity. As a package, it is unbeatable.
Today we'll have a look at all the nude bits from the 1974 French cult film
"Les Valseuses" aka. Going Places, available on DVD, region 1 and others. As
you may know the story deals with a bunch of unemployed youngsters from poor
neighborhoods around Paris who don't know how to kill their time. As a result
they get mixed up in a number of unspeakable acts that would be unimaginable
in today's France, like forcing a not completely reluctant woman in an
empty train to show her breasts and suck on them, behaving disrespectfully to
members of society who work for a living, destroying cars etc ...
complete science-fiction by today's standards.
The film was directed by Bertrand Tavernier and propelled three actors to
stardom in France. First the subtle Patrick Dewaere who never got the better
of his inner demons and shot a bullet through his head in July 1982. Secondly
Gérard Depardieu, also a very fine actor, provided you leave his films in
English out of the equation. In Shakespeare's language Gérard is like a fish
out of the water and doesn't seem to realize what he's saying, which ruins his
performance. If you can see him acting in his native language in French films
you'll notice what an excellent actor he is.
The third performer is Miou-Miou (real name Sylvette Héry), our first point of
interest. She gives a 3B performance in various scenes in 9 clips.
Unfortunately in some of those scenes Depardieu and Dewaere are stark nekkid
as well. (1,
Brigitte Fossey shows breasts as the aforementioned woman on a
suburb train in two clips (1,
Isabelle Huppert had a small role as the young daughter of a bourgeois couple.
Patrick and Gérard sniff her muff and nod in approval in a far off shot in one
'Caps and comments by Melaninis:
Scoops, here are a few nude or semi-nude women from the Sonny Chiba film "Bodyguard".
Pat's comments in yellow...
JENNIFER ANISTON IS GQ "MAN OF THE YEAR"
Man, That's Stupid! - Because of her display of poise, grace and good humor
during her humiliating divorce from Brad Pitt, Jennifer Aniston has been
chosen as GQ magazine's "Man of the Year." But she poses provocatively
inside and appears topless on the cover, although she discreetly manages
not to expose anything.
* She hasn't got anything to expose: she's a MAN, remember?
* Now, that's what I call a "man's man!"
* We should petition People magazine to name her "Sexiest Man of the
ENTIRE NATION THREATENS COMEDIAN
And They're Really Litigious - The Kazakhstan government is threatening
legal action against British comic Sacha Baron Cohen ("Ali G"), who also
plays a Kazakh character named Borat whom they say portrays them as a
nation of insane drunks. Borat has claimed that in Kazakhstan, women are
kept in cages, people earn their living as gypsy catchers, the national
sport is shooting dogs and then having a party, and the favorite drink is
wine made from horse urine. The officials call it a defamatory and unfair
depiction of their people.
* They use only the finest sheep's urine, dammit!
* Their favorite drink is actually a wine that makes you WISH you were
drinking horse urine.
* He got it all wrong! First, there's a party, THEN the dog-shooting!
* One comedian hasn't been threatened by an entire nation since the
American debut of Rob Schneider's last movie.
IDIOT SPERM DONORS OF THE RICH AND FAMOUS
Britney Is Seriously Mad - Britain's Daily Star reports that Kevin
Federline broke his hand after falling from a podium at the trendy L.A.
hotspot, The Spider Club. A witness said he was showing off dancing,
"throwing some seriously mad moves," when he spun out of control, slipped
and landed on his butt. Federline's constant partying while wife Britney
Spears is home caring for their baby has sparked rumors that she's already
drawing up divorce papers.
* Then both his arm AND his ass would be in a sling.
* He probably broke his hand on purpose, so he can't sign them.
* This could be catastrophic for Kevin because if he can't impress drunk
chicks in L.A. bars, it's a career-ending injury.
* Let's pray he broke the hand that he writes rap lyrics with.
My Big Fat Greek Jackass - Paris Hilton's fun-loving boyfriend, Greek
shipping heir Stavros Niarchos, crashed his Bentley and paid a homeless man
to pour a soda on himself. Now, his latest frolic is that he reportedly
started a pillow fight at Kelly Osbourne's 21st birthday party, and it
escalated into a brawl that set off the fire alarm at Las Vegas' Hard Rock
Hotel. The sprinklers went off, the hotel was evacuated, and Stavros had
to pay over $110,000 (US) damages. Paris reportedly yelled at him, "I
don't want Hard Rock to think I bring in people who do this stuff!"
* Why would they think THAT?
* So she did the honorable thing: she blamed it on her monkey.
* She'd dump him, but she's running out of Greek shipping heirs.
* Fortunately, the Osbournes thought it was the best party ever.