Cet obscur objet du désir (1977) is the last film by Luis Buñuel (some would say thank God), and is a 103 minute film about the world's greatest cock tease, and the old guy who puts up with everything she dishes out and comes back for more. I must caution you that it is politically correct to like this film, as Luis Buñuel is one of THE great directors. That being said, I was alternately bored and bewildered through most of it. There is a recurring theme of international terrorism, but I could never figure out why. Then there is the fact that Buñuel used two actresses to play the same role at the same age. Carole Bouquet played Conchita in France, and Ángela Molina played her in Spain.

The story opens with our hero, Fernando Ray, checking out of his room, boarding a train, then pouring a bucket of cold water on a woman on the platform. For the rest of the film, he relates their story to the other people in his compartment, which include a judge, a woman with her daughter, and a midget Psychologist. I am nearly certain that there is a lot of symbolism in this film, or at least that my High School English teachers could have found some, but I understood nothing but the tale of the old fool and the cock tease.

Bouquet shows breasts in several long and well lit scenes, and Molina showed pretty much everything including full frontal in a famous nude Flaminco dance scene. Maltin dutifully awards three stars, and IMDB readers have it in the high rent district at 7.6/10. The upcoming Criterion release is a good transfer, and lots of special features. If you have ever had lovers nuts, you might relate to this film. In French with subtitles. C+.

I'll get some longer review pages up for these tomorrow. I'm running a little behind. 

Aimee & Jaguar is based upon a true story about a lesbian love affair involving good Wehrmacht wife with several children who risked much to have an affair with a free-thinking Jewish woman and, inevitably, lost her because of the very power of the love that drew them together. The wife was still alive, 84 years old, when this movie was released.

Although Maria Shrader did most of the nudity, including two full frontal scenes, most of our European colleagues were more impressed by the more babe-alicious Heike Makatsch (a Jeri Ryan lookalike) and Johanna Wokalek. In our balloting for "best nude scene of 1999", both of those women made the top 30 for their work in this film, even though they only showed their breasts. Shrader, on the other hand, was shut out in the balloting! Actually, the best breasts in the film belong to Elisabeth Degen, but, well, her face isn't very appealing.

It is a pretty good movie, but you don't want this region 1 DVD. The whole damned thing is blurry.

• Shrader (1, 2, 3, 4)

• Makatsch

• Wokalek

• Degen

Deathstalker is one seriously dumb movie. It has the exact same plot as all other grade B fantasy sword & sorcery flicks. Complete and absolute power can be obtained by re-uniting the three pieces of the Holy Cow, thereby granting the possessor the Full Rizzuto. The musclebound Good Guy has to prevent the Bad Guy from obtaining all three pieces. You want to write your own Conan movie? There you go. The only redemption for this ultra cheapozoid film, in which all the scenes are too dark and go on too long, is that there is nudity from two big-busted principals, and many, many extras. Which is good, because of a flick like this had no nudity, what would be the point in making it?

• Lana Clarkson (1, 2)

• Barbi Benton. Barbi wasn't just any Playmate, but the absolute queen of the hutch. She was Hef's live-in girlfriend for seven years. Her film career was somewhat less impressive, and she never caused much career trepidation for Streep or Emma Thompson, but she took the time to whip out her jumbo jacks here for our entertainment. I think those distinctive and familiar breasts (large, dark aureolae) are the real thing. (But I'm no expert on that subject) (1, 2, 3, 4)

Charlie's French Cinema Nudity site is updated

Jayne Mansfield nude! The former hef-babe (1955) and sex symbol of the 50's and 60's making a topless appearance (plus one frame with a bare bum in link #6) in the movie "Promises! Promises!" (1963).

This puppy just opened up in very limited theatrical release in Canada yesterday!