"Crazy Love"

Crazy Love (1987) is a Flemish language film based in part on a short story by Charles Bukowski, The Copulating Mermaid of Venice Beach. Young Belgian film maker Dominique Deruddere wanted very much to make a short based on this story, but was advised that the Flemish film board was too conservative for the story, which involves necrophilia. They decided on a bod plan. They submitted a script based on another Bukowski story, shot the film they wanted, and hoped it would be approved after the fact. Luckily for them, it was.

Then, they had the bright idea that it was good enough to be part of a feature length film, but they couldn't get there by simply expanding the existing story, and decided to film two more crucial nights in the heroes life, one at the cusp of adolescence, and the second at High School graduation. As the film opens, 12 year old Harry Voss is watching a romantic tale in the cinema, and is madly in love with the female lead, Florence Béliard, so much so that he steals the publicity still on his way out of the theater. Once home, he asks his mother about the romantic beginnings of her marriage to his father, and forms a lifetime obsession with romantic love. The next day, his best friend begins educating him to the realities of physical love, including an attempt to score his first kiss and feel on a carnival ride, the attempted seduction of the drunken mother of a school mate (Carmela Locantore) and finally masturbation.

In act two, Voss is about to graduate from High School, and has serious acne. It is so bad that he is the laughing stock of school, and seldom leaves his apartment. He tries to get lucky at the graduation dance, but is rejected, and ends up jailed for breaking into a boxcar and stealing a bunch of scotch.

Act three is the part of the film actually based on Bukowski, and, although the first two acts seem like they could have been written by him, they were more based on Deruddere's youth. They did change the ending, a change which Bukowski liked very much.Voss is older, and a drunken bum. He runs into his old friend in a bar, and, after stealing a bottle of scotch, they head to his friend's place. Along the way, they see a body bag being loaded into a hearse, and steal the body. When they open the bag at home, they discover the still warm corpse of Florence Béliard, and Voss, much to his friends disgust, has sex with the body. The film ends when Voss decides to join this perfect woman for eternity, walking into the ocean with her in his arms.

By now, you must be asking yourself how I could be so interested in a film about necrophilia. While the film does contain this event, you have to see it in context to understand that this is a very moving film about romance vs. sex, the act itself is important to the story, and it is presented in a rather poetic fashion. We see breasts through fishnet lingerie from a female wrestler, who was either Pierrette Laffineusse or Brigitte Simon. Locantore also shows nipples in lingerie, and Béliard shows breasts as the corpse.

IMDb readers have this at 5.7 of 10. It won a host of awards, including best Flemish film 1965-1990. While the critics at the time were not especially kind, it did receive international distribution, then faded into obscurity. After Dominique Deruddere received an Oscar nomination for Everybody's Famous, a little historical revisionism took place, and the critics call Crazy Love "his beautiful first film." You know by now if you want to see this or not. It is a wonderful release from Mondo Macabra, and includes an amazing number of special features for a film this old, including interviews, with the director, Bukowski, and several others in the cast and crew. This is a very high C+. If you liked Bar Fly, also based on Bukowski, you will love this, as Dominique Deruddere has managed to take Bukowski to another level, adding more humanity and dignity to the story.

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  • Carmela Locanntore (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
  • Florence Beliard (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
  • Unknown (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    Pie in the Sky (1996):

    This DVD requires me to be the bearer of very bad news.

    • This was originally a fairly cute, quirky 95 minute romantic comedy with a very nice nude scene which featured the intriguing Anne Heche.

    • It is now a fairly cute, quirky 94 minute romantic comedy which could easily get a PG-13 rating.

    In my mind this is a major rip-off. The scene is still in there, but it has been re-edited so that nothing at all is visible. In other words, it is now a network TV version of the same movie.

    Don't get this DVD. What else can I say?


    The Rapture (1991):

    This DVD is not a rip-off like the one for Pie in the Sky, but it is a disappointment because it includes only the widescreen theatrical version and not the full frame version. As a result, we've lost the very best Mimi Rogers nudity in the movie! (Although there is still quite a bit of nudity, albeit not much from Mimi.)

    • Carole Davis (1, 2)

    • Stephanie Menuez (1, 2)

    • Mimi Rogers. These are the scenes actually on the DVD. (1, 2, 3, 4)

    • Here's the Mimi Rogers nudity we did NOT see on the DVD, from Probert's VHS captures. As you can see, it just reaches down farther than the widescreen DVD version - just far enough to include Mimi's breasts in their massive entirety.

    (Reviews for these two movies tomorrow)

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    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.


    Words from Scoop.

    .avi's from Shiloh.

    .wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.

    NOTE: because of a unique combination of circumstances with the Windows media player and some substantial bandwidth theft, we will have to do all of our movie files in zip format. Left click on the files as you normally would to view a picture. When you get a choice, click on "save", and put it on your hard drive in the directory of your choice. UnZIP and play from there.

    I know this is not especially convenient, but it allows the film clips to continue. I can protect .zip files from hot-linking in the same way I can protect still images. For some reason, if I protect .avis and .wmvs from hot-linking, they will not play in the Windows media player, and I can't get a satisfactory work-around. Perhaps I will find a better solution, but for now this new policy allows you to continue getting the movie clips you want to see, which is much preferable to my abandoning the clips altogether.


    Ecstasy (1932): Day 2

    Ecstasy was perhaps the single most explicit film commonly screened in the United States before the Hays Office and the Catholic Legion of Decency managed to obtain control of the film industry in the mid 1930s. (Ecstasy is not actually an American film. It was filmed in Czechoslovakia.)

    You can find my still caps from this film in the back issues and the Encyclopedia. More important, you can find Shiloh's film clip right here.


    Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble with the codecs for these movies:

    Shiloh says:

    FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the vids says the video codec:  DivX Decoder Filter & audio codec:  Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with. When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG Layer-3.  A friend of mine told me about compressing the audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
    When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp & asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost too much to buy in my opinion.

    A reader says:

    You mentioned that some users were having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool designed to determine what codec is needed for a video. Hope this is useful to you or your users.

    Scoop says:

    I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9. The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly larger, and slightly lower quality.

    'Caps and comments by Spaz:

    Paradise Falls season 2, week 8
    Michelle Latimer goes down on Danielle Hampton in hot lesbian sex scene.

    Degrassi High: episode Little White Lies
    Obligatory episode where the boys sneak into a stripclub. No nudity but a great find. Rare gueststar appearances by toronto stripper Sugar Bouche and Lynda Speciale of Screwballs fame.

    Rescue Me: episode Revenge
    Cable series about a post 9/11 New York fire department starring Denis Leary as a foul mouthed chainsmoking chauvinistic irish fireman. Couple of Seinfeld tributes in this episode such as Dennis forgetting his girlfriend's name (not Regina) and Andrea Roth describing her tits as "real and spectacular".

    "Twisted Nightmare" (1987)
    Slasher with the usual all around gore and nudity.

    'Caps and comments by Dann:

    "Revenge of the Cheerleaders"
    What do you expect from a movie that has David Hasselhoff playing a character named Boner? Yup, it's that bad.

    The 1977 comedy is the second of The Cheerleaders Collection, but it's also the worst of the three. Lame plot has the cheerleaders struggling to save their school from being merged with a rival school, but unfortunately, unlike the original The Cheerleaders, this one isn't especially funny. Maybe that's why they made the third of the series, Cheerleader Camp, a comedy/horror. If the jokes fell flat, they'd gross you out or scare you to death.

    Of course, the main reason for watching these movies is naked cheerleaders. While there is plenty of nudity, there's also a lot of time wasted with dumb comedy bits that weren't funny. One interesting piece of casting is that Cheryl Rainbeaux Smith played a pregnant cheerleader, realistic casting because she WAS pregnant, apparently. They kept her pretty well hidden in the nude stuff, but in one shower scene you get a brief glimpse of her obviously pregnant belly, and that's shown in the Patrice Rohmer collage (third row, far right), although it's not very clear.

    The quality of the DVD was horrible, so bad, in fact, that they placed an explanation before the start that all the original prints were in bad shape, and they had to take bits and pieces from several different masters to produce the DVD. Still worth seeing, though, for a great example of 70's sexploitation.

    'Caps and comments by Oz:

    "Girl for girl"
    Girl for Girl is just the same. We see all 3 B's from Tracy Angeles, Toni Taylor, Kelli McCarty, Flower Edwards and Antoinette Abbott. Susan E Hale and some unknowns are topless.

    • Tracy Angeles (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
    • Toni Taylor (1, 2, 3, 4)
    • Kelli McCarty (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
    • Flower Edwards (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
    • Antoinette Abbott (1, 2, 3, 4)
    • Susan E Hale (1, 2, 3)
    • Unknowns (1, 2)

    "Romeo and Juliet"
    No nudity in this 1996 version of a modern Romeo and Juliet. However, Diana Venora and Claire Danes are down to their underwear.

    • Diana Venora (1, 2)
    • Claire Danes (1, 2, 3, 4)

    "Clean Slate"
    Again, no nudity in Clean Slate. Some pokies by Olivia D'Abo and Valeria Golino is in her underwear.

    "Beverly Hills Cop 2"
    Teal Roberts is a stripper in Beverly Hills Cop 2 and she shows her boobs.

    • Teal Roberts (1, 2)

    "Happy Times Hotel"
    Happy Times Hotel is a Korean movie and Jie Dong is a blind girl, which explains why she is running around in her underwear when a man is present.

    • Jie Dong (1, 2)

    "Born on the Fourth of July"
    Full frontal nudity by prostitute Cordelia González in Born on the Fourth of July.

    • Cordelia González (1, 2, 3, 4)

    Eva Longoria Another look at the "Desperate Housewives" babe looking gorgeous on Leno.

    Sarah Polley
    Kim Poirier
    Scenes from the recent remake of "Dawn of the Dead" (2004). In these 'caps we see Polley's face, and Poirier's nekkidness.

    Edwige Fenech
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

    Señor Skin 'caps of the Euro-celeb topless in a soapy shower scene from the 1978 Italian movie "L'Insegnante va in collegio".