Live Once, Die Twice

Plot-heavy made-for-TV effort.

A woman (Kellie Martin) loses her husband in a boating accident. Some evil dudes appear on her doorstep and tell her that hubby owed them five million dollars and she had better find it, or else! She thought hubby sold real estate, but he obviously must have had a secret life "smuggling platinum." Meanwhile, the FBI tells her that her husband is probably still alive.

She has no luck finding any clues to hubby's secrets except for a letter to a guy in Detroit she never heard of. She shakes the FBI tail and drives to the address in Detroit where she meets another woman with the same story: husband who was always on the road and died the same time as Kellie's hubby. Were they partners? Nope. Same guy. Maintains two separate identities with two different wives. Fakes a different death for each wife.

You think I'm spoiling the movie for you? This all happens in Act I. Then it gets REALLY complicated.

The two wives hire some retired shamus to track down their mutual hubby. The FBI is trying to track all of them down. The husband is actually a fed himself, deep under cover. Well, that's what he tells Kellie - and she believes him, although the crusty old detective tells her that there are not many federal agents allowed to boff two wives and kill off at least two random men (the guys who provided the corpses in his two fake deaths) as part of an undercover assignment.

In fact, I never even figured out why the guy maintained two wives, even after all the veils were removed and the secrets revealed. It seems to me that only made his deceptions more difficult, and gave him far more lies to keep straight. But I was only half paying attention, and I may have missed some critical explanation.

Or not.

Who cares? The only reason I'm covering this film at all is that Kellie Martin had a sex scene. Oh, she appeared to be naked, but you can't see any fun stuff. Kellie also took a shower on camera and changed her clothes on camera, each time keeping the goodies just out of sight.

"You're thinking, "Dude, what did you expect? It's a TV movie." I know that. I had the same thought ... until I saw a scene in a strip club which demonstrated that nudity was obviously NOT off-limits. It was filled with fleeting moments like this:

So it was just Kellie who had no intention of getting naked. I guess that's never going to happen. The last time she appeared in the Fun House was more than seven years ago, and then only in a cheesy, fully-dressed Maxim spread, not a film scene. To my knowledge she has never done any nudity of any kind.

You know who she is, even if you don't immediately recognize the name. She was on ER for a few years as Lucy Knight, then quit the series to finish off her Yale BA in Art History. Since then she's been the star of those Mystery Woman movies on the Hallmark Network, and has even directed a couple of them. (If, like me, you've never actually seen one of them, one IMDb wag suggests that they're like Murder She Wrote without the senility.)

Anyway, here's the sex scene, for what it is worth.



Cable Round-Up

It seems that we always end up talking about TV shows in the Tuesday edition. So be it. None of this work is mine, but was culled from various places around the 'net.

Dexter, S2 E5

Jaime Murray film clip, samples below



Dexter, S2 E6

Jaime Murray film clip, samples below


Brotherhood, S2 E6

Janel Moloney film clip, sample below


Tell Me You Love Me, S1 E10

Ally Walker film clip, sample below (Yes it's there. It's a narrow vertical strip.)


* Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).

* White asterisk: expanded format.

* Blue asterisk: not mine.

No asterisk: it probably sucks.


Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.








The Sopranos Season 4, part 2


The Sopranos Season 5 Episodes 1 through 6.

Some of the old family are released from prison and want to return to work. The exception is Tony's cousin, who wants to become a massage therapist. Tony and Carmela are still split, and Anthony Junior is having more trouble than ever in school. Carmela has an affair with his guidance counselor. One of the returned gangsters causes trouble and has to be dealt with. Tony and Adriana, who have gotten close, have an accident, and everyone figures the two of them are having sex. It is untrue, but Christopher is not amused. Uncle Jun is starting to show symptoms of Alzheimer's. Tony tries to put the make on Dr. Melfi. When that doesn't work, he returns to therapy.

The first half of season 5 has good pace, and the show seems well on track. We now have indications that Christopher is not all that stable, the feud with the New York families is escalating, Tony has a cancer removed from his head, thus showing his mortality

I am looking forward to the rest of the season.

It was a good season for nudity. Lorraine Bracco shows breasts. Edie Falco's character shows buns, but it is likely a double. Patti D'Arbanville shows breasts and buns, and several strippers also show breasts and buns.


Lorraine Bracco


Edie Falco (??)


Patti D'Arbanville











Prime Cut

(Time Machine set for 1972)

Angel Tompkins, just some brief breast exposure, but she is a very sexy lady.


Janet Baldwin some boobage in a dark scene.

More breasts from Sissy Spacek.

Sissy Spacek and Janet Baldwin with full frontal as the "Prime Cuts".

Wrap it up with two more unknown "Prime Cuts".






Notes and collages

The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas

part 8 of 8

Dolly Parton

  ...as per my usual, I decided to do this series project without an overview of what I was about to do. Nearly 2000 screen captures later I am moving on to a few simpler projects...

 In coming days: Linda Hamilton pokies from "The Terminator" and a retrospective of Stella Stevens over the years...  






Susie Porter in Remote Area Nurse

Kira Reed hanging out by the pool

Gillian Anderson in Straightheads, from the Region 1 DVD

Caroline Ducey in Ballo a tre passi

A film clip of Irene Jacob's famous booty in Mille milliemes. Samples below.

A film clip of Maggie Q in Manhattan Midnight







Return to the House on Haunted Hill

2007's Return to House on Haunted Hill is a well-done and fun flick to watch, whether or not you liked the original.

Hill House had been a sanitarium in the 1920's, and horrible experiments by the doctor in charge left the house full of evil spirits seeking revenge and peace.

Eight years earlier, an evening of fun by a group trying to win one million dollars by staying in the house overnight turned into a night of terror.

Now, after escaping that horror, a woman mysteriously kills herself, and her sister, in quest of answers, returns to the house. Also coming to the house are treasure hunters looking for the statue of Baphomet, worth a fortune and possibly the source of the house's evil ways.

Horror fans will love this I think, at least I did, and some nice random acts of nudity make it even more interesting. Incidentally, if you saw the movie and wonder where the hell the beach scene came from, you didn't watch the credits, because this scene, which actually could lead to a sequel, came AFTER all the credits.

Amanda Righetti Cerina Vincent others











Maria Valverde