I am doing something I never thought I would do. Dark Angels is a recent hard core release. However, it is a two hour hard core release with more plot than sex, which I never thought would happen again. Not to make light of the action, as it is graphic, frequent, and hot, but, to the directors credit, he limited each sex scene to ten minutes or less, and kept monster shots to a minimum. Most of the action is filmed as a medium shot, and has the participants face in frame. The plethora of images below are very explicit, and include male organs doing what they were designed for. If this is not your idea of celebrity nudity, pass on these images.

The best way to describe this is Jess Franco on steroids. It is a vampire hard core, replete with atmosphere, gore, naked women, hot sex, digital effects, make-up effects and a plot that you may even care about. The film opens with Ginger Paige picking up a guy in a disco, screwing him to exhaustion in a restroom stall, then calmly bitting his throat for dessert. As she leaves, she is chastised by head vampire Sydnee Steele for going out on her own. Sydnee then enjoys a passing motorist. Jewel de Nyle sees the toothy finale to the car sex, and reports what she saw to a police officer, then goes home. Sydnee joins her in her sleep, and initiates her into the group, but she is not thrilled to be dead, and is not enamored of the lifestyle. None of this stops her from hot sex with Sydnee, the cop, and a morgue attendant. There is also a sex scene with two virgins, April and McKayla, but I was unable to discover which was which.

I am not excited as much because this is a vampire movie with a lot of exposure as I am that someone has discovered how to make a profit from a high production value hard core with serious plot content. (Cut the sex, and the film is still over 60 minutes). This means that we could possibly see hard core:

Teen Slasher
Biker
Coming of Age
Teensploitation
Blacksploitation
Women in Prison

and a host of other genres. Wouldn't you love to see the Anette Funicello character shrieking in orgasm in the Malibu surf? I applaud director Nic Andrews and Digital Sin DVD for reviving the quality adult film. Oh, and get this. The DVD release is a special edition, complete with two commentary tracks (one of which has an insert of those commenting on the angle track), and the entire script -- yes, this had enough plot to require a real script. Commentary one is director/cast, and track 2 is director.crew. There is also a second DVD of special features including image galleries, out-takes, bloopers and making of features. the highest grade for a hard core is C+, but I would really like to award more.

Jessica Lange was a latecomer to acting, having made her first appearance in a movie at age 27. Since she'd probably like to forget that one ("King Kong"), she never really did anything substantial before her 30th birthday. Once she got goin', though, there was no stoppin' her. I think of Jessica as the anti-Brando, in one sense.

 Brando probably had more talent than any actor who ever lived. Pauline Kael used to tell the story of the epileptic fit he used to feign in his early stage career, that stopped the show many times because the audience thought it was an actor having an epileptic fit, and not part of the play, so people in the audience would try to help.

Unfortunately, Brando got lost after about five great performances, and has had nowhere near the career his talent merited. How many great performances has he given since the fifties? I suppose only one (Last Tango). How many good performances? Maybe a half-dozen, many of those debatable - Countess from Hong Kong, The Godfather, Don Juan de Marco, Bedtime Story, maybe One-Eyed Jacks, maybe Apocalypse Now, maybe The Score. That's it for 40 years!  Somewhere in there, his overwhelming talent was swamped in a tidal wave of self-indulgent portrayals where the director should have simply kicked his silly ass off the set and hired a serious actor. Missouri Breaks and Mutiny on the Bounty and the Dr Moreau remake come immediately to mind.

Jessica Lange has probably had a better career than Brando, despite the fact that she didn't have one lick of natural talent, and never did anything creditable before she was 32. Her performance in King Kong is a sample of legendary atrociousness. She made Kathy Ireland look like Meryl Streep. And yet, through a combination of hard work, serious study, and intelligence, she became one of the best actresses of her generation.

I'm going to update her section tomorrow, so I decided to take a fresh look at some of her nude scenes. These are all new captures, not repeats.

• The Postman Always Rings Twice was her first substantial role. She was 32 years old, acting opposite Jack Nicholson in the remake of a B&W classic. Contrary to what you may think, there was some brief nudity in this film. It only lasted four frames, but here it is. (Lots of other sexy frames will appear the update tomorrow, but no nudity). I'll post a review page tomorrow. (1, 2)

• The Frances Framer biopic, Frances, was the first of her six Oscar nominations. Actually, I guess that's not exactly correct, since she was nominated twice that year, for both Frances (lead - lost) and Tootsie (support - won). At age 33, she exposed everything in this film. The role was custom made for her. If Frances Farmer had been born in 1949, she would have been Jessica Lange. I'll post a review page tomorrow. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

• Blue Sky is the movie for which she won her best actress statuette. She was 45 years old, and she still did a topless scene, but it was far from the camera. Really far! Her topless scene was shot from a chopper, pilot POV, while she was wading in the surf..

• Titus is her final nude scene, I suppose. She was 50 years old (actually 49 when the filming was done), and did a clear, well-lit topless scene. (1, 2, 3)

You may also find many. many additional captures from the first three films in Tuna's archive, which can be found through the main members' links page. There are also some see-throughs in Blue Sky, and some sexy non-nude stuff in Postman.

There is a new Jennifer Jason Leigh volume in the Encyclopedia. Find it under L or J in the Encyclopedia of Naked Celebrities on the main members' links page.

LETTERS

Hey, Scoop, only one question. How did Tuna manage to get naked pictures of Topo Gigio?

Obscure, but funny. Tuna's pictures were some dame named Gogo Rojo, which seems to mean "the red go-go dancer". Topo Gigio was a sweet little puppet character - seems like he was on Ed Sullivan every week. "This week on ur shew - the little Italian mouse, Topo Gigio"

Topo has his own web page - http://www.topogigio.it/  - cute little bugger

I never cared much for Topo, and I can't for the life of me remember why they kept stressing that he was Italian. I don't remember him singing opera or driving a Lamborghini or giving any other little mice the kiss of death, or anything like that.

My own favorite on Ed Sullivan was Señor Wences - the guy who did "s'alright? s'alright!", and painted his fist to look like a talking vagina, and other equally deep and meaningful material. I forget, did he also do sock puppets? Man, I love those! Now THAT guy was some super-charged entertainment. Thanks for your letter. It reminded me of those quaint times.

By the way, the good Señor lived to be 103 years old. He just died about a year or so ago! Just for fun, here's his obit.

I was going through some of my image archives (dating back to 1995) when I came across a few great shots that I had forgotten about. I cleaned them up a little and voila, here they are:

Thanks to Aesthete for these great 'caps. In this batch, all links except #1 show Gretchen nude. In link #1 she's in a bikini.

Pat Reeder
The Comedy Wire

From www.ananova.com

Topless rock band promise to tone down act

A topless all-girl heavy rock band have promised to tone down their act when they perform in Liverpool.

Rockbitch, whose members live in a French sex commune, will play at L2 in the city on November 6 after being granted a license by the council

But the band who describe their act as an "in your face sex-ritual show" have already been banned from playing elsewhere.

Liverpool city council's licensing department is reportedly satisfied there is nothing which breaks the Public Entertainment Act.

The Liverpool Echo says the promoters promise the Colchester and Essex-born girls will not be getting up to their "more controversial exploits".

There is a warning on the tickets for the event that anyone easily offended should stay away. They will be sold only to over 18s.

A council spokesman said: "We are satisfied with the band's assurances to promoters at L2 about the content of their show."