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"There's Nothing Out There" (1991)

There's Nothing Out There (1991) is a comedy/horror spoof actually made in 1989. It is out in a first rate anamorphic directors edition with feature length commentary, and lots of extras. Three couples, and another guy are going to a house in the woods owned by one of them for Spring Break. The lone guy is a horror film fanatic, and is constantly telling them how much everything that happens is like a horror film. The three girls are:

Wendy Bednarz -- Breasts in a shower (and maybe bush), breasts in the living room, and breast in a midnight swim.Bonnie Bowers -- breasts and buns making love. Claudia Flores -- breasts after she is attacked by the creature.

Claudia has some credits, mostly for Brazilian TV, Bonnie is now a bassist for the New York Philharmonic, and Wendy appeared in one other film.

Everything about this film was tongue in cheek, and it was shot on a very low budget, but the production values are decent. To give you an idea of just how wacky this is, in one scene, the entire boom mike comes into frame, one of the good guys uses it to swing out the Window and escape, and they play the Indiana Jones theme. The producer was worried that there wasn't enough nudity, so the director wrote in a scene where a crowd of stoners climb out of a Van, strip, and go skinny dipping. Three of the women showed their breasts. Turns out, they were in the wrong horror film, left, and never came back. IMDB folks say 5.0/10, and I have seen far worse spoofs. C+

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  • Bonnie Bowers (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
  • Claudia Flores (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
  • Unknown (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
  • Wendy Bednarz (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    Bandits is the new film about the "Sleepover Bandits", a laid back modernization of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. I saw the trailer, thought it looked good, went to the movie. I got fooled. It has about five good lines - all in the trailer!

    On the other hand, applying the "Saving Silverman" rule, any film that makes fun of the song "Wildfire" ("got a hoot owl hootin' by my window now") can't be all bad. (Cate Blanchett's character liked the song, but she admitted that she likes ALL pony songs.)

    No nudity.

    • Cate Blanchett (1, 2)

    Styx is a grade-b version of "Lock, Stock". I think it was made in South Africa, stars Bryan Brown, Peter Weller, Angus McFadyen. For those of you familiar with baseball, this is a Triple-A cast. Not down there with Grieco and Fahey and Pare, but not up there with Hanks and Pitt and Samuel L,  either.

    Welcome to your new movie-making partners, Angus. Say Sayonara to Mel Gibson and Ben Cheadle.


    Yesterday's question was - besides Cher and Bjork, are there any entertainers who are better at some other form of entertaining than at the thing that made them famous?

    Reader's suggestions

    • Robin Williams is a good example - debatable, but valid. He may be a better actor than a comic. Certainly his best acting is better than his worst comedy.

    • Jim Nabors sings, and sold a lot of albums. Same with Frank Fontaine (Crazy Guggenheim on the old Joe the Bartender sketches). Both are presentable singers. Neither was an especially good actor, to say the least..

    • Sofia Coppola is obviously better as a director than as an actress, so I guess she's sort of a right answer. (If you grant that she was famous as an actress, but maybe that's not valid because she was only famous for being incompetent)

    • Mandy Patinkin became famous as an actor (Princess Bride, network TV), but is a great singer, so he might be a good example.

    • How about the 2 rappers named Ice? Ice-T and Ice-Cube? Their movies are a whole lot more tolerable than their "music."

    • Dean Martin, maybe. He became famous as a singer, but I think he was better as a talented comic performer in movies, TV, and live appearances.

    • Patsy Kensit



    When you begin to discuss how people pronounce place names, you enter an entirely new arena.  In the USA, at least, a combination of frequent usage and regional accents results in unique local pronunciations of almost all place names.  BALL-more MUR-land, RACH-ter N'YORK, WILKES-burr PEN-sa-VANE-ya, and LOU-a-vul Kain-TUCKe come quickly to mind.  And, of course, N'yaw-lins LOO-se-AN-a (It seems to me that the locals tend to put a "y" sound between the N and the O, I suppose as a vestige of the "ew" in "New").  

    Another Americanism in place names came about because our less than fully literate ancestors often named their new settlements after places in the old world, and slaughtered the pronunciation in the process.  Thus, we have such names as Mantua and Cadiz, in Ohio (or, a-HY'a, as we like to say), pronounced "MAN-ta-way" and "KAD-iz," and KAY-ro Illinois (Cairo).  Sometimes, too, the American pronunciation comes closer to the spelling than does the old world version.  For example, Thames Street, in Newport Rhode Island, is pronounced as the word is spelled, not "Temz."  I think most people agree that, properly, these are the correct pronunciations for these places.

    Finally, there are the many Native American words that got strange renditions via amateur attempts at phonetic English, especially when those words were first filtered through French.  Should it be Chippewa, Ojibway, or perhaps something entirely different?

    Good stuff. My college roommate's mom came from Louisville, and she pronounced it with yet another variant, "Laura-ville"

    Graphic Response
  • Emily Mortimer a very nice collage combining several topless scenes from the movie "Coming Home" (1998).

  • Priscilla Barnes very nice breast exposure and bit of bare bum too in a lesbo scene from "Erotique" (1994). Priscilla was about 40 when this was made, and looking pretty darn good nekkid!

    Be sure to pay Graphic Response a visit at his website.

  • Penman
    Halle Berry
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

    Can you ever have too much Halle nudity from "Swordfish"? I think that's about the same as asking if you can ever see enough of Connelly in "The Hot Spot". In my book, the answer is a big, fat no.
  • Links 2-5 are excellent full screen, single frames of "the scene".
  • Link #6 has great leg views
  • Links 7 and 8 show the black undies.

  • Rachel Weisz
    (1, 2, 3)

    Rachel as a blonde (and it doesn't really work). No nudity in these 'caps from "Beautiful Creatures" (2000), but Weisz fans will appreciate adding something new to their collection.

    Francesca Vanthielen
    (1, 2)

    From "When the Light Comes" (1998). Link #1 has just a tad of nipple and bum exposure. Link #2 compensates with some very lovely toplessness in good light.

    Marni Thompson It seems that the once promising source of Canadian cable goodies has fallen short of Snowblind and Spaz's expectations. Even though this thong view is fantastic, this is the only skin from "Paradise Falls" lately.

    Cookie Mueller

    Mary Vivian Pearce

    Mink Stole

    All three ladies go topless in the 1972 John Waters movie "Pink Flamingos".

    Excellent collages by Zon featuring some classic B movie bimbos...

    First up, vidcaps from the wonderful grade Z movie, "Slave Girls from Beyond Infinity" (1987)!

  • Cindy Beal
  • Brinke Stevens
  • Elizabeth Kaitan (1, 2)

    Next up, 'caps from the movie "Dr. Alien".

  • Ginger Lynn Allen
  • Edy Williams
  • Judy Landers...the only actress not topless from Zon today.

  • Variety...
    Jeri Ryan
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    Jeri's life after "Voyager" she is 'caps from "Boston Public". It's good to see that the wardrobe people at FOX were paying attention during her Trek days and kept her clothes as tight as ever! As a bonus, she also did a shower scene! Thanks to DAI and downdude.

    Sheila Kelly

    Sandra Oh

    Jennifer Tilly

    A very special thanks to CT for these edits of 'caps from "Dancing at the Blue Iguana". With a few color adjustments, much more skin is visible!

    Tara Fitzgerald Beautiful, full frontal and rear nudity in scenes form "The Camomile Lawn" (1992). Thanks to Feckit.

    Anniek Pfeifer
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    Gorgeous breast exposure in scenes from the Dutch movie "Ik ook van jou". Great 'caps by The Night.

    Natasha Vojnovic
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

    Another batch of high quality fashion scans by Blackshine.

  • Link #6 has very clear breast exposure
  • Links #2 and #4 also show some nipple, but it's very subtle.

  • Celeb News
    Once again, thanks to Pat Reeder at The Comedy Wire for this story....

    Curvy stars top 'heavenly bodies' poll

    A poll to find the best 100 celebrity bodies suggests a fuller figure is more likely to set men's pulses racing. Jennifer Lopez, famed for her ample bottom, comes top, with Kate Winslet and Kelly Brook also making the top 10. Victoria Beckham barely scrapes into the top 50, and model Kate Moss manages only 43rd. Geri Halliwell makes the list at number five, and Catherine Zeta Jones reaches number two. David Beckham was voted best male celebrity body, only narrowly beating Prince William.

    The British featured well in the lists with six out of the top 10 men coming from this side of the Atlantic while five of the top women were UK born. More than 5,000 people voted in the poll conducted for Celebrity Bodies magazine. Its editor Alison Hall says it proves thinness as a look is no longer desirable. "Jennifer Lopez has a sensational body, admired by men and women alike, and she proves curves are more coveted than thinness. The fact that voluptuous Catherine Zeta Jones is second and the super curvaceous Kate Winslet and Kelly Brook are also in the top 10 Best Female Celebrity Bodies reinforced the message that curves are in and thinness is firmly on its way out," she said.

    "And Beckham at the top of the male body league clearly shows that the fit, muscled, sporty look wins women over, especially with the youthful broad-shouldered Prince William in second place and gorgeous hunk George Clooney in third. Women like their men to be all man," she added.

    Here are the lists in full:

    Female List:

    1 Jennifer Lopez
    2 Catherine Zeta Jones
    3 Elle Macpherson
    4 Angelina Jolie
    5 Geri Halliwell
    6 Naomi Campbell
    7 Kate Winslet
    8 Kelly Brook
    9 Jennifer Aniston
    10 Cameron Diaz
    11 Britney Spears
    12 Denise Richards
    13 Louise Redknapp
    14 Salma Hayek
    15 Liz Hurley
    16 Kylie Minogue
    17 Beyonce Knowles
    18 Gisele Bundchen
    19 Tamsin Outhwaite
    20 Estelle Warren
    21 Penelope Cruz
    22 Reese Witherspoon
    23 Cindy Crawford
    24 Halle Berry
    25 Nicole Kidman
    26 Uma Thurman
    27 Mariah Carey
    28 Yasmin Bleeth
    29 Sarah Michelle Gellar
    30 Heidi Klum
    31 Liv Tyler
    32 Janet Jackson
    33 Caprice
    34 Rachel Stevens
    35 Lisa Snowden
    36 Mel B
    37 Helena Christensen
    38 Cat Deeley
    39 Jenny McCarthy
    40 Emma Bunton
    41 Denise Van Outen
    42 Charlize Theron
    43 Kate Moss
    44 Dannii Minogue
    45 Julia Roberts
    46 Martine McCutcheon
    47 Nell McAndrew
    48 Gwyneth Paltrow
    49 Rachel Hunter

    Male list

    1 David Beckham
    2 Prince William
    3 George Clooney
    4 Mark Wahlberg
    5 Dougray Scott
    6 Jude Law
    7 Brad Pitt
    8 Jamie Oliver
    9 Robbie Williams
    10 Ewan McGregor
    11 Jamie Redknapp
    12 Russell Crowe
    13 Antonio Banderas
    14 Matt Le Blanc
    15 J from Five
    16 Johnny Depp
    17 Freddie Prinze Jr
    18 Joseph Fiennes
    19 Matt Dillon
    20 Pierce Brosnan
    21 Dermot O'Leary
    22 Ricky Martin
    23 Craig David
    24 David Ginola
    25 P Diddy
    26 Heath Ledger
    27 Ryan Philippe
    28 Marcus Schenkenberg
    29 Tom Cruise
    30 Jay Kay
    31 Billy Zane
    32 Vernon Kay
    33 James Gooding
    34 Noah Wyle
    35 Max Beesley
    36 Richard Blackwood
    37 Leonardo Di Caprio
    38 Jared Leto
    39 Keanu Reeves
    40 Martin Kemp
    41 Andre Agassi
    42 Ralph Fiennes
    43 John Cusack
    44 Cris Judd
    45 Mel Gibson
    46 Will Smith
    47 Bruce Willis
    48 Jamie Theakston
    49 Jade from Damage
    50 Johnny Vaughan

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