This section includes Scoop's site notes, images, vids, web finds, and meandering prattle.

Alpha Dog (2005 or maybe 2006 - tentative release date is February 24)

Official summary:

"A drama based on the life of Jesse James Hollywood, a drug dealer who became one of the youngest men ever to be on the FBI's most wanted list. The film is the story of Johnny Truelove, a young man from southern California's San Gabriel Valley whose ambition is to follow in his father's footsteps. When one of Johnny's plans goes awry, his father is forced to step in and save his son from a life behind bars."

It stars Emile Hirsch, Sharon Stone, Justin Timberlake(!), Dominique Swain, and others. This film will be rated R for "pervasive drug use and language, strong violence, sexuality and nudity" - all the things that make life worth living and movies worth watching. You know a film is going to be fairly naughty when it seems to have nudity in the trailer! Some fellow took said trailer and compacted the best few seconds of it into a slo-mo which you should enjoy. ( Zipped .avi)  I'm not certain of this, but the bulletin boards claim that the two women are probably Amanda Seyfried and Olivia Wilde.

By the way, you can no longer find the full trailer on line. The Russian site which used to have it has posed a notice saying it has been removed at the request of their distributor, whatever that means. (Their internet provider, I suppose.)

Das Madchen Rosemarie (1996)

HBS Graphix made this film clip, and the quality is stupendous for its small size (1.4 meg). Nina Hoss flashes a full frontal.

NOTE: this zipped clip is in XVID format. It may shut off Internet Explorer if you click on it from there. Don't panic. That is a known XVID bug, and it is annoying, but there is no danger to your computer.

Taffin (1988) is to star Pierce Brosnan as The Quiet Man is to John Wayne. Not that the film is near the caliber of the Wayne classic, but this is a kinder, gentler Brosnan than we normally see. Brosnan, on the surface, is an Irish tough guy who makes a living as a strong arm debt collector. We soon learn that he has another side, as an ex seminarian, who is still a serious scholar, and looking for truth. He also frequently helps out the little guy. He is coerced into helping his home town prevent builders from taking out the sports field for a road access to a proposed chemical plant, then to help the townspeople chase off the evil developers and corrupt local officials who are perfectly willing to ruin the environment in the name of profit.

The developers have their own muscle (a seemingly endless supply), and it will take all of Taffin's ability to win this one. His love interest is played by Alison Doody. The nudity is breast exposure from two strippers, Tina Shaw and Colette Dolan. IMDb readers have this at 5.2 of 10. I thought this UK film gave Brosnan a character with more depth than usual to work with, had great pace, plenty of action, and many likable characters, making it an easy watch for me. This is a C.
Colette Dolan

Tina Shaw

"The L Word" Season 2, episodes 9-12

Episode 9, "Later, Later, Latent"
Alice wants Dana to use toys on her, and Dana is not real sure about that. Bette and Tina have a grief encounter. Jenny learns the truth about Carmen's feelings for Shane, and discovers what the male room mate has been doing in his spare time, with hidden cameras all over the house. Meanwhil, Shane is beginning to want a relationship, and Jenny is getting stranger and stranger, obviously troubled by her introspection, and ghosts from her past.

No Nudity

Episode 10, "Land Ahoy"
The girls go on a lesbian cruise. Alice starts becoming way too clingy. Bette and Kit struggle with a visit from their aging father. Jenny confronts the male roommate.

Mia Kirshner shows breasts confronting the male roommate.
Mia Kirshner

Episode 11, "Loud & Proud"
Gay pride day, and Alice's possessiveness is becoming a problem. Dana's brother comes out to her, and we learn a little more about Jenny's past. Kit and Bette discover that their father is dying.

No Nudity

Episode 12, "L'Chaim"
Bette moves her father to her house so he can die at home. Jenny does a strip act recreating a repressed memory.

Mia Kirshner shows full frontal in a strip act. An uncredited stripper shows breasts.
Mia Kirshner


Today from the Ghost...B-movie and daytime soap star Leslie Kay Sterling baring all 3 B's in scenes from the late night cable series, "Hot Line".

Leslie Kay Sterling

Today we return to the 70's Sci-Fi sex comedy "Wham Bam Thank You Spaceman".

First up is Anne Gaybis who gives up all 3 b's while having sex with a boyfriend and a spaceman. Very impressive chest.

Anne Gaybis

Next is Valda Hansen who plays a rich bitch, she's getting it on with the butler.Some skin but not as much as Anne.

Valda Hansen

Even Dyanne Thorne of "Ilsa" fame is here playing a prostitute getting it on with a customer and then one of the Spacemen.Robo-Hooters from Dyanne.

Dyanne Thorne

Is there more? There has to be! We need parts for the Time Machine and you can't get them back in 1975. But not to worry Michael J. Fox stopped by and he's off to the future to pick them up for me.

Tomorrow's show will have a "Babe in Bondage".

'Caps and Comments by Brainscan:

Think of the movie sequels that have been superior to the originals. Godfather II and The Empire Strikes Back are arguably better than the brilliant movies that came before them but of the movies I know and love only The Road Warrior is out and out better than what came before it.

When you consider the kinds of movies I watch so I can capture some new stuff and send it in to the Funhouse there are different criteria. Tits and ass, for example...the PTA quotient. In how much on-screen time and by how many gals and by how many good looking gals do naughty bits show up. The more famous the gals the better, but in the end it is all about the quotient.

And that makes the previously capped and submiited Vamps 2 soooo much better than the original Vamps. Vamps 2 has the exuberant Glori-Anne Gilbert and about a dozen other gals who look just fine, thank you. Vamps traces the early years of Glori-Anne's character but get this: 1) she is not played by Glori-Anne (the actress's name is Jenny Huss); 2) she is more than sort of a chunk; 3) she does not give up the goodies. Who casts a woman in the lead of a stripper movie and allows her to dictate the clothing removal terma of her contract?

Jennifer Huss

Other stripper characters are played by Stacy Sparks and Tamika Hoffman and even though both do stripping routines each has exactly two frames of hooter exposure. WTF?!

Stacy Sparks

Tamika Hoffman

That leaves the heavy lifting to Amber Newman (who gets killed off in this original, only to show up in the sequel. I think that is explained in the sequel but I was not about to pay attention because when it comes to Amber it's a been-there, done-that kind of moment). And so the movie leaves it to Jenny Wallace to show off her extremely attractive frame. Jenny does have a kick-ass bod but she also has a Striesand-esque nose, so that when she lies down she looks like a two-car garage.

One of Jenny's stripping scenes really resonates around here. For it is late, you see, and the book shop owner locks up only to find Jenny in his shop and she sits him down, strips off her garments and gives the lad a lap-dance. Yes, that kind of thing happens to us all the time. At least that is what I tell the guys who work for me...lock up and there is some chance a nekkid babe will give you a lap dance. Uh huh. In the movie Jenny eats the poor lad, but I figured he deserved it since the shop looks like one of those stripmall chain stores that are driving privately-owned shops out of business. Would that only Jenny were part of a trend.

Amber Newman

Jenny Wallace

'Caps and comments by D Slack:

I went to Best Buy today looking for "House of Wax”" with Vincent Price. When I couldn't find it, I started browsing all the horror selections to see if it was included on a 2-in-1 DVD. That’s when I saw two "Swamp Thing" DVDs! I absent-mindedly picked it up and saw Adrienne Barbeau on the cover. Holy Shit! It's finally on DVD again! Apparently it was released in August 2005, but it took my Best Buy two months to get it. Here's the Amazon link

Granted, it is the PG version, but Adrienne still bounces her way through the movie. Wowza, so that's how natural boobs move! Based on all the current lollipop chicas with plastic boobs (or no boobs, ala Paris), I forgot how much real ones moved! MGM still managed to sneak in some nudity; and although it's a long shot, you can definitely see her left nipple. However, the extended frontal nudity is gone.

The DVD transfer is good. I have an .mpg of the original uncut nude scene, and the DVD is a lot cleaner and more vibrant. There are practically no extras on the disc, just the Theatrical Trailer and Subtitles.

I've included my own caps, 77 in all. Mostly cleavage. I think Hankster will appreciate some of these as Adrienne spends part of the movie tied up at a formal dinner and then chained up in a dungeon. There is one shot looking almost straight down as Adrienne runs by in a very low-cut dress. I tried my best with the caps, but they just don't do the bouncing boobs justice.

Adrienne Barbeau

"Sleepover Nightmare" (2005)
Recent canadian direct-to-video slasher with lots of gore and bikinis but very little nudity.

Kristine Cofsky: partial boob.

Hayley Sales: bikini.

Jolene White: fully clothed sex scene.

"Some Things That Stay" (2004)
Canadian coming-of-age movie where Gail Harvey directs her daughter Katie Boland in a nude skinnidipping sequence.

Katie Boland: partial boob and butt skinnidipping.

Megan Park: partial boob.

Alberta Watson: nude in painting.

"Rescue Me" season II episode Believe
Callie Thorne starts a lesbian fling with blonde Brette Taylor

Callie Thorne: kissy kissy and hand over blouse.

"Dead Man's Gun": episode Death Warrant
While the syndicated version removed most of the nudity it still shows Suki Kaiser bare assed in bed.

Suki Kaiser: partial boob and butt.

"Over There": episode Mission Accomplished
Mrs. B goes stateside and gets out of uniform.

Nicki Aycox: partial boob and butt with some nice underwear shots.

"Degrassi: The Next Generation": episode Weddings, Parties, Anything
More cleavage by Cassie Steele and chromedome Joey Jeremiah gets lucky.

Cassie Steele: mega cleavage.

Nicola Correia Damude: nipple pokies.

"Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle" (2004)
The two topless chicks in the car have been identified. The blonde with robohooters is Jennifer Hill from Ice Queen and the redhead is canadian hefmag prospect Talia Russo.

Jennifer Hill & Talia Russo: boobies.

"High" (1967)
Caps from the second half of the Canadian drugsloitation.

Astri Thorvik: more boob and butt.

"Virgin Paradise" (1987)
Small Canadian television indie movie about three rich girls who come across some stolen gems in the Caribbean.

Zuzana Marlow: nice bikini and pokies.

Charlene Richards: bikini.

Gloria Gifford: showing off pirate's dream (sunken chest, buried treasure, geddit?)

Christine Leigh: cleavage as secretary

"Siblings" (2004)
Canadian black comedy about lust and murder.

Sarah Polley: masturbating in her skivvies

Sarah Gadon: check out her gams

Evo Morales promises that if elected president of Bolivia, he will decriminalize all coca farming.

White Sox win again, up 2-0.  Lidge couldn't get the job done. He gave up a home run to a guy who didn't hit a single homer all year. End of story.

You vill vatch it, und you vill like it!

  • UNESCO has passed a cultural diversity resolution which essentially says (as usual) that a country's leaders, and not its people, should decide what forms of entertainment they like! In almost every country of the world, American movies are more popular than the ones produced locally, so the French culture minister said nations had a right to set "artistic quotas" because 85% of the world's spending on cinema tickets went to Hollywood.
  • Apparently the alternate tactic - making movies which their people will like better than American movies (which shouldn't be so goddamned hard considering how American movies have sucked lately) - seemed to be unreasonable to them.

Now THAT'S a Christmas gift! Breast implants with built-in MP3 player.

Rapper Cam'ron Shot In Failed Attempt to Carjack his Lamborghini

Nigerian president's wife dies, needs your help to unfreeze her assets.

"Fellowship 9/11" - reimagining the Lord of the Rings as told by Michael Moore.

  • Submitter wrote: "My favorite scene: the innocent citizens of Mordor being portrayed as happy kite-flying Orcs before a coalition of evil neocon Hobbits began their illegal war."

Saints likely done in New Orleans, San Antonio is their likely home for 2006. Who knows after that?

  • The city of New Orleans wants to retain the rights to the current logo, colors, etc., in the hopes of attracting a new team - the so-called "Cleveland deal."
  • That seems cool. The San Antonio Saints sounds silly, anyway. (Although not as silly as the NBA's Utah Jazz, another displaced New Orleans team. I suppose if the Saints also move to Utah, they could be The Utah Latter-Day Saints.)
  • The USFL team was called the San Antonio Gunslingers. The WLAF team was the San Antonio RoughRiders. Other Texas-themed names from the world of sports: Broncos, Drovers, Colt 45's, Chapparals, Longhorns, Mavericks, Rattlers, RoadRunners, Scorpions, Outlaws.

Roethlisberger returns, beats the Bengals.

Rough year for the Pack (1-5): they blow a 17-0 halftime lead against the Vikings

Some crazy comedy from Will Ferrell and Vince Vaughn as the hot-shot salesmen of Delco Cat Toys

Gabrielle Union's Birthday marred by racial bigotry? Or is it a slanderous rumor?

Astro Pic o' the Day - The Black Hole At the Center of the Milky Way

Steve Martin Receving Mark Twain Humor Award

Weekend Box Office Results, October 21-23, 2005

  • It was another anemic weekend, anchored by more weak new releases. The Top 12 films posted grosses 27% lower than the comparable group from last year.
  • The top film of the week was based on a video game, and received only 21% positive reviews. And that was the week's winner. That kind of says it all.
  • Moviegoers rejected the preachy Hollywood puffery of North Country. The Oscar-hopeful's debut weekend was a paltry six million dollars, although it appeared on more than 2500 screens.
  • Dreamer, the family-oriented Seabiscuit clone from Dream Works, received generally good reviews, did better than expected, and finished in second place.
  • The fourth new release, Stay, was expected to bomb, and did so even more convincingly than anticipated, finishing out of the Top 12. It grossed less on 1600 screens than Good Night and Good Luck grossed on 225
  • George Clooney's Murrow film showed that a highly targeted film can make a profit - if it is made for a modest cost. Although it has not yet reached 300 screens, Good Night has already crept up to $5 million at the box office, and it only cost $7 million to make. Similar lessons were learned previously from The Gospel and Waiting ..., which will turn substantial profits without monumental grosses. I see that as a good lesson for Hollywood to learn. I'd rather see them invest $140 million in ten to twenty small pictures than in one Stealth. The updraft of that is more choices for the audience, and I'm happy to see the industry economics start to point in that direction.


Four clips from Stay, the struggling psychological thriller which opened Friday

TIME Magazine - The top 100 novels (English language, since 1923)


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  • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
  • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
  • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
  • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.