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My eyesight is back! If I had known how long it would take, I would have called
Junior to fill in today, but I thought I'd be OK. Oh, well. The page was late
today, but everything is now back to normal.
French Cinema nudity is updated
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* Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).
* White asterisk:
expanded format.
*
Blue asterisk: not mine.
No asterisk: it probably
sucks.
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OTHER CRAP:
Catch the deluxe
version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles,
here.
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Mi Conejo Es El Mejor
(1982)
Mi Conejo Es El Mejor, which translates My Cunny is the
Best, or My Pussy is the Best, is a Spanish softcore sex film starring Lina Romay.
Surprisingly, Jess Franco, Lina's long-time lover and collaborator, as
well as a prolific Spanish director of similar films, had nothing to
do with this one!
Scoop's sidebar:
Conejo literally
means "rabbit" in a direct modern translation, but "rabbit" and "cunny"
are precisely the same thing, both in a literal linguistic sense, and
in terms of the implicit sexual metaphor.
Other European languages use "mouse" and
"rabbit" as sexual euphemisms and in sexual double entendres,
precisely equivalent to the way English speakers use the word "pussy."
But the English use of "pussy" in that sense is modern, dating back
only to the 1870s. Not only that, but when it was first used it may
indeed have been referring to a rabbit, not a cat! The first written
use of pussy as a slang version of "cat" was in 1726, but it had been
used as a term for "rabbit" even earlier. Throughout the 18th and
early 19th centuries, the term "pussy" was used to refer to both
animals!
In fact, the use of "pussy" to refer to
rabbits continued much longer in Australia. The 1941 edition of
Baker's "Dictionary of Australian Slang" explicitly defines "pussy" as
"a rabbit." The use may continue in some parts of Oz to this day,
although I do not know that for a fact. I never heard the term used in
this way, not when I worked in Sydney, nor when I worked in Perth.
In the 16th through 18th
centuries, the word "rabbit" was used in English to
refer to the young of that species, as we use "puppy" today to mean a
young dog. The common and ordinary term for the adult burrowing rodent
in those days was "coney," which rhymed with "money" or "honey," and
was often spelled "cunny" in those days before orthography was
standardized. So "cunny" is both a direct translation for and and a
cognate form of the Spanish word "conejo." Both words ultimately
derive from the Latin word for a rabbit, which was "cuniculus,"
which in turn seems to come from the Greek "kouneli."
One
linguistic theory holds that the Greek word came from an even more
ancient Celtic word.
In summary, both "pussy" and "cunny"
are slang terms for the female genitalia, and both terms used to refer
to rabbits!
Lina is in a
reform school as the story opens, and is caught lapping another
student, María Eugenia Muñoz. When the guard catches them, she beats
Lina with a ruler, but then cuddles the other girl, whom she is sweet
on. Lina has had enough and escapes, but finds herself broke and alone
in Madrid. A handsome stranger, Emilio Linder, comes to the rescue,
offering her a hot bath, dinner and a warm bed. Everything seems on
the up and up, and his maid, Elena Alverez, is put in charge of
getting her bathed and settled into a room. Her first clue that
something may be wrong is when she wakes up in the middle of the
night, and finds Emilio beating then screwing the maid. After a few days
in the house, Lina wants to play, too, even if it entails bondage and
discipline.
When he offers her to a business associate, Lina leaves, but
returns, and the three settle into a relationship. Then they are
taken to an orgy. This doesn't seem to bother Lina, but Emilio
recruits a third woman to join their happy family. Those who guessed
María Eugenia Muñoz, the student from the first scene, are way ahead of me.
I greatly enjoyed this little softcore. Lina Romay was at her young
prime, and demonstrated that she could act. Much of the full frontal exposure is very well lit. For
the kinkier among you, there is lots of bondage and whipping, and
plenty of the old favorite, the lesbian kiss. The Spanish clearly know
how to make erotica. Yes, it is in Spanish with no subtitles,
but I had no trouble at all following the story.
IMDb is still awaiting 5 votes. That's not surprising, since this rarity
has never before been available in the US. RLDVDs.com has filled the
gap with an all-region DVD. Spanish-speakers who like softcore erotica
need this one for their collections, and Lina Romay fans also need it.
Lina Romay, María Eugenia Muñoz, Elena Alverez and an unknown
show everything.
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Notes and collages
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Rise
Rise: Blood Hunter is not just a vampire movie. Yes, the 2007 film IS a
vampire movie, but it is also a well-done horror story with many nice
twists, and it's very different in many ways. It's done in non-linear
sequence, which makes it a little hard to follow at first, but after a few
minutes, you'll easily figure out what's going on.
Lucy Liu plays Sadie Blake, a reporter for a tabloid, who just finished
a story on what appears to be a cult of Goth-types.
A young woman who was part of the piece shows up dead in a dumpster two
days later, and Sadie begins to wonder if there was more to this group
than she'd realized. After an involuntary meeting with the group's leader,
things get really crazy, and Sadie wakes up dead.
Telling you more will give away too much of the plot, so suffice it to
say this is a top-notch vampire flick that's a lot more, and is well worth
watching.
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| Lucy Liu |
Cameron Richardson |
Carla Gugino |
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Buried Alive
Your typical horror movie where a bunch of guys and girls go to a cabin to have some fun, one of them has to take his pills but
doesn't, and then people start dying. I probably just typed out the plot of a million horror movies, but you always get different actresses doing the
nudity, so is not a problem to watch the same plot again and again.
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The Comedy Wire
Comments in yellow...
Thursday, Republicans had a field day slamming Senators Hillary Clinton and
Charles Schumer for attaching $1 million to build a Woodstock Museum to a health
and education bill. It was backed by a billionaire Democratic donor. Clinton
and Schumer said it would boost upstate New York's art, culture and tourism, but
John McCain called it a "shining example" of pork barrel spending, and
conservatives mocked it as "an LSD flashback" and a "hippie museum." After a
rancorous debate, Republicans got it removed by a 52-42 vote.
* Turns out there's already a government-financed museum
for
old Woodstock relics. It's called "PBS."
In San Francisco, free needles for drug addicts turned out to have a downside: a
lot of overdose deaths. To counter that, officials are moving to create
America's first public, supervised injection room. It's patterned after a place
in Vancouver where addicts can get injected with heroin, cocaine or meth in
private booths, then chill out with a cup of coffee. There have been 800
overdoses there but no deaths, thanks to the medical staff. A spokeswoman said
it's sort of like a beauty salon, and is so crowded that if it were a
restaurant, they'd be making a profit.
* Well, it IS like the beauty parlor that Kate Moss
goes to.
Las Vegas news sources report that 12 FBI agents staged a raid on a warehouse
owned by magician David Copperfield. They reportedly took a computer, the
memory chip from the security cameras and $2 million in cash from a safe. Agents
also visited the MGM Grand where Copperfield plays. They would not discuss the
object of the investigation.
* President Bush suspects David Copperfield of being a terrorist because he
made the Statue of Liberty disappear. He ordered the raid on that warehouse to
find her!
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