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Saturday
Contact junior by writing junior@scoopy.com. Contact Scoopy by writing unclescoopy@msn.com. Contact Tuna by writing tuna@scoopy.com Send submissions to scoopy@scoopy.net
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Use this search device to seek additional information from amazon.com about any of the books or movies you read about here.
To see and use all the Funhouse features, you need Netscape 6.+ or MSIE 5.+.
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| Tuna
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"C.C. and Company"
C.C. and Company (1970) is a motorcycle exploitation film starring Joe Namath as C. C. Ryder, outlaw biker, but with a heart and a conscience, and Ann-Margret as a fashion model. When Ann's car breaks down, members of the gang decide to rape her, but Namath stops them. Namath is obviously the only competition for leadership of "The Heads," the group he rides with. They run back into Ann-Margaret at a motocross, and Namath decides he is going to compete to impress her. A showdown with the gang leader is inevitable.
Ann-Margret shows breasts and buns in a very dark sex scene with Namath, and Jennifer Billingsley, as the girlfriend of the gang leader, shows breasts bathing in a pond. IMDB readerss have this at 3.8 of 10. I would rate it that high as well, if the DVD was decent quality, but it is the most over-saturated transfer I have ever seen, and is very mushy, as if it was mastered from a third generation VHS tape. They obviously hoped having Ann-Margret and Joe Namath would insure box office. This isn't good exploitation, has a lame story, and the sex scenes are not even sexy. D.
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Ann Margret
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Jennifer Billingsley
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"Down by Law"
Down by Law (1986) is being released in a shiny new Criterion Colection edition, and is a flawless transfer of the best B & W photography I think I have seen to date. Made by Jim Jarmusch, it won numerous International awards, and was nominated for a Golden Palm at Cannes. It is set in New Orleans. DJ Zack (Tom Waits) is kicked out by his girlfriend, and a friend pays him a grand to drive a car across town. The police stop him, open the trunk, and find a body. Meanwhile pimp Jack (John Lurie) is also set up, and is arrested in a hotel room with an underage girl. The two end up cellmates. They do not bond quickly, but eventually find a way to get along, then they are joined by Italian Roberto (Roberto Benigni), who killed a man with an eight ball after being caught cheating at cards. He slowly also becomes their friend, and it is he who finds a way to escape.
That is where their troubles really begin, as they flee through the swamp. The pace of the film is very slow, and gives you a real feeling for what the endless hours locked in a cell would really be like, but is basically a buddy picture. Ellen Barkin appears in the beginning of the film, as the girlfriend who throws Zack out, but shows no skin. Billie Neal plays one of Jack's hookers, and shows breasts and bush in an extended scene at the beginning, where she berates him and lists all his faults, and he totally ignores her. At the time of her death in 1999 at the age of 44, she had 16 credits at IMDB, including Eve's Bayou, Internal Affairs and Born on the 4th of July. I believe this to be her only film exposure.
This fairly screams art film, but still is rated 7.5 of 10 at IMDB. Ebert awards 3 stars, and says that the more you know about movies, the more you will like it. Some will be screaming for something to happen, and will find the film way to long, but it kind of grows on you, and there is an undercurrent of humor throughout. The new Criterion release is a two DVD set, with loads of extras. John Lurie did original music for the film, and Tom Waits also provided vocals. This film is a B-, crossing over from Indie art film to a much wider audience.
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Billie Neal
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| Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
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Movies:
Heavenly Creatures is one of the films that demonstrated director Peter Jackson's
fitness to direct Lord of the Rings. That Jackson is one twisted Kiwi. This is
a film about murderers that strips away your moral authority, makes you root for them to do the killing,
puts you completely in their mindset, then
shames you for it. Imaginative, odd, quirky and ... well ... seriously twisted.
- Kate Winslet (her screen debut)
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Updates:
Other crap:
Screenit.com's report on the nudity in Formula 51 (not
really what we want to see, but at least Meat Loaf didn't get naked):
We then see them rolling around in a bathtub full of water (both are still
in their wet underwear). He then takes off her shirt (we see the tops of Emily
Mortimer's bare breasts), more kissing follows, and we then see their wet
underwear dropped to the bathroom floor. We then partially see him between her
legs with some movement and the rhythmic squeaking of a bath toy that pushed up
against the side.
We see Elmo's (Samuel L Jackson's) bare butt as he walks off a golf course
completely nude.
Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded
into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant
humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or
Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or Mick Locke, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.
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| Helvete
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| Ana Belén |
The Spanish actress and pop singer adjusting her breasts in scenes from "La Colmena" aka "The Beehive" (1982).
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Maribel Verdú
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Gorgeous breast exposure and thong views from another Spanish babe. This time in 'caps from "Y tu mamá también" (2001).
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| Paz Vega |
Yup, one more beautiful Spanish actress gettin' nekkid! Pax goes ful frontal in scene from "Lucía y el sexo" (2001).
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Victoria Abril
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The Euro-nudity legend in scenes from "101 Reykjavík" (2000).
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| Variety
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| Elvira |
Well Halloween is almost here, so ZonononZor put together this fantastic collage of everyone's favorite Mistress of the Night. As Cassandra Petersen, he included a very nice old school full frontal nude pose. As her alter ego, a whole mess of cleavage and some leg as well.
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| Gina Gershon |
Gina topless and feeling herself up in "Bound".
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Nastassja Kinski
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Full frontal nudity from "To the Devil a Daughter" (1976).
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| Jessica Biel |
The WB star posing with thong views and just a bit of areola exposure in Gear magazine.
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| Jessica Moore |
The Italian actress topless and baring her bum in scenes from "Top Model" (1988).
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| Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio |
Topless and a very subtle hint of pubes in scenes from "The Color of Money" (1986).
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James King
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Most folks know her from her role as the hot blonde from "Pearl Harbor", but before she became an actress, she did a bit of modeling. Thankfully for us, she did a bit of nude modeling. Here she is posing topless.
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Brigitte Bardot
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The sexy screen legend posing topless in an old issue (late 60's) of Lui magazine.
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Jolene Blalock
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Very sexy poses of Vulcan babe from "Enterprise" from Ramp magazine.
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Vanessa Kelly
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Excellent scans of the sexy brunette from the November 02 issue of FHM. Fully nude in #1 (no nudity unfortunately), partial nipple sightings in links 2 and 3.
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| Colleen Fitzpatrick |
The pop singer/actress also known as Vitamin C, topless in 'caps from "Dracula 2000", by Penman.
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| Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
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Pat's comments in yellow...
TERRORISM NEWS: THE ASSES OF EVIL
May It Give You Lead Poisoning - Thursday, Saddam Hussein choked with tears
as he put his hand on the Koran and swore himself in for another seven-year
term as president, after the 100 percent vote he got from the 100 percent
turnout in Tuesday's "election." He told Iraqis that the defeat of America
"was in the near future," and his #2 man presented him with a sword and a
giant pencil, explaining that each was his to use at its own time.
First, the pencil, to write the suicide note...Then the sword.
You use the giant pencil until it's dull, then you use the sword to
sharpen it.
Of course, there's no lead in his pencil until he takes Viagra.
100 percent of Iraqis who watched this were moved to throw up.
PUB INSURES BARMAID'S BOOBS
Double Indemnity - Nevyn King, owner of the Bricklayers Arms pub in
Altrincham, England, has taken out a 100,000-pound ($140,000 US) insurance
policy on his barmaid's breasts. He estimates that 24-year-old Jane
Booth's 34D breasts attract that much business in a year, and if he lost
"her assets," he'd lose "a lot of the regulars who are fascinated by them."
Jane told The Sun tabloid that she was shocked and embarrassed at first,
but now, she's being extra careful not to damage herself. She said, "I can
only collect two glasses at a time."
She balances them on her breasts.
If anything happened to her breasts, the customers would leave him flat.
If her assets began to sag, it would be positively deflationary.
$140,000 is ridiculous! They only cost $3,000 in the first place!
McDONALD'S YANKS PORN POP-UPS
Want Porn With That? - McDonald's has suspended a trial to provide "McNet
Access" at three restaurants in Scotland. Even though they installed
software to block porn sites, explicit pop-up ads kept coming on the
computer screens right next to where children were eating Happy Meals.
Some of the older boys were having REALLY Happy Meals.
Kids were learning that it IS possible to "supersize" breasts.
The teenage boys who work there could also see the ads, which resulted
in another type of "pop-up."
Parents would take their business elsewhere, but McDonald's is the only
place in Scotland where you can get a decent meal.
Scoopy Jr adds...Would the new ad campaign be "Food, Fucks and Fun"?
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