Sunday

MAILBOX:

Scoop: (re: Doriana Grey)

"Actually, Jesus Franco churned out a lot of pornos in the 80s. I've seen 'El ojete de Lulú' (Lulu's Asshole), in which Lina Romay puts an Oscar in her ass (I think there's some symbolism there), 'El mirón y la exhibicionista' (The Voyeur and the Exhibitionist), 'Lilian, la virgen pervertida' (Lilian, the Perverted Virgin), and some others. Most of them are legitimate, no-holds-barred hardcore porn films."

 

 

* Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).

* White asterisk: expanded format.

* Blue asterisk: not mine.

No asterisk: it probably sucks.

OTHER CRAP:

Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Confessions of  Driving Instructor

 (1976)

Driving Instructor is the third in the "Confessions of" series, and doesn't deviate from the formula. This time, the film chooses the upper class to poke fun at.

Anthony Booth has decided to open a driving school, and his partner will be Robin Askwith. They are next door to an aristocratic driving academy, so their work is cut out for them, especially since their competitor is a snooty rich Scotsman who has it in for them. Fortunately, the snob's daughter (Lynda Bellingham) fancies Askwith. Not that it makes much difference. The business, as usual, ends in disaster. En route, Askwith nails the rich girl, his secretary (Maxine Casson), and various customers (Suzy Mandel, Sally Faulkner and Chrissy Iddon). Robin's dotty dad has less to do than in the two previous films, but manages to join in the snob-bashing by making a mess of a pretentious restaurant.

Compared to the earlier entries in the series, this one had a higher ratio of physical-to-verbal in the humor category, and the dialogue was not so clever. At this point in the series, Askwith and Booth had both become caricatures of themselves and the entire joke was wearing thin. That is not to say it is an utterly bad film. There are plenty of beautiful naked birds doffing their kits and a comical rugby match which must be seen to be believed. But Driving Instructor is definitely a step down from the first two Confessions. 


 

Lynda Bellingham shows her left breast. Maxine Casson, Suzy Mandel, Sally Faulkner and Chrissy Iddon do full frontal.

Lynda Bellingham

Suzy Mandell

 

Maxine Casson

Sally Faulkner

 

Chrissy Iddon

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Warm Summer Rain

(1989)

This drama starred Kelly Lynch as a woman who attempts suicide, is revived in the hospital, escapes the hospital, gets drunk and winds up in a strangers bed the next morning ... married to him.

Cheerful movie.

The good part is she is naked for several scenes in the flick including some full frontal as they escape a fire.

 

Kelly Lynch

 

 

 

 

 

Notes and collages

"Charmed"

Shannen Doherty  and Stacy Haiduk, Season 1, Episode 11

Shannen Doherty

Stacy Haiduk

 

 

 

 

 

 

Some nice out-and-about materials from Squiddy

Eva Mendes poking Sadie Frost sunning Adele Silva showing
Film clips:

Jennifer Ehle in The Camomile Lawn. It always surprised me that she never became known in America. In her prime she was gorgeous, and the camera loved her. Plus she was stacked, unintimidated by nudity, and a competent actress.

Tara Fitzgerald in The Camomile Lawn. Has anyone ever seen Tara dressed?

Lena Headey in 1994's Fair Game. The quality of the clip is not very good, but it's a bit of a rarity - a Brit TV movie which has never made it to DVD, and which is neither in our Encyclopedia nor Mr. Skin's database - and the nudity from a young Lena is VERY sweet. I will own a copy if this ever does make it to disc, not just for Lena's nudity, but also because it sounds like my kind of 70s nostalgia film. Since there are no captures from this in the Encyclopedia, perhaps one of you wants to give it a try. The poor quality made it beyond my imaging skills.

Clemence Poesy in Bienvenue chez les Rozes

Claire Keim in The Girl

Rowdy Roddy's favorite cousin, Billie Piper, in Secret Diary Of A Call Girl

Sheila White in a TV series often listed among the best in history, "I, Claudius" It's also one of my 25  favorite books. Well, to be precise, it's two of my favorite books - "I, Claudius" and "Claudius the God." In fact, I think I liked Claud the God even more than the first one. (Sample cap of Sheila below)

 

The latest from the "crack pack." No crack this time, but some all-but-toplessness from Paris Hilton while slumming.

 

James King in the green screen version of Sin City

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Blood and Chocolate

 

 

Maria Dinulescu

 

 

 

Agnes Bruckner

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Species IV

Like Species III, Species IV: The Awakening is a direct-to-video release that premiered on the Sci-Fi Channel, and like III, IV is a poor imitation of the very good original, but also like III, IV had some nice nudity that I assume was cut from the TV presentation. I've seen/capped all four, so I feel qualified to state that this latest in the series is also the worst, story-wise.

Miranda (Helena Mattsson) is a beautiful and brilliant young college teacher who lives with her scientist uncle. When Miranda suddenly becomes ill, the truth comes out: Miranda was "made" (they never used the term cloned) by the uncle and a colleague, and they used alien DNA in the brew, causing Miranda to try to violently mate with any male that moves. At a loss to cure Miranda, who is now being hunted by police for offing a bunch of guys while trying to have alien sex, they head to Mexico to find the rogue scientist partner.

They find the guy in Mexico, happily churning out half-aliens who are running amok killing the locals, but hey, it's Mexico, so nobody cares (according to the evil scientist). Now, they're in a race to save Miranda's life.

Yeah, it's really bad, and it's a real stretch to even connect it to the original, but hell, at least the nudity's good. Species V, anyone?

Helena Mattson Marlene Favela