Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

Terminal Justice (1998)

I can review this film in three words " ... starring Lorenzo Lamas."

Three more words will sum up why I'm writing about it at all: Kari Wuhrer nekkid

These are not my caps. In fact, I haven't seen the movie. I made these zipped .wmvs  (1, 2) by converting somebody else's larger files. I will return with caps and comments when I've reviewed the DVD. (NOTE: IMDb incorrectly indicates that no DVD is available, but you can find it by searching for it directly at and elsewhere.)

Kari Wuhrer

As I mentioned somewhere last week I've made clips of French actress Emma de Caunes in "Ma Mère". The less said about this gruesome film the better.

I had some serious troubles with these clips and I had to use a different program than I usually use. I spent much more time than I would have liked on this one and in the process I lost the audio somewhere. Please don't ask me how. Emma shows all three B's in these 4 clips that last for some four minutes.

  • Emma de Caunes (1, 2, 3, 4)

To make up for this little mishap I am including a short but nice clip of Lt. Fellatio Caine's ballistic expert on CSI: Miami, the adorable Emily Procter. he displays her natural two talents in "Breast Men" (1997).

'Caps and comments by Hankster:

Today we look at "The Screaming Dead".

First up is a scantily clad A. J. Kahn as a "Babe in "Bondage".

A. J. Kahn

Actually all of our gals wind up as a "Babe in Bondage" in this horror flick and next is Misty Mundae and she's Naked and winds up pretty bloody, but it's the fakest looking blood you will probably ever see.

Misty Mundae

Then we have C. J. DiMarsico topless in a shower scene the arms over head suspended in her nightie.

C. J. DiMarsico

Our final two girls Heidi Kristoffer and Rachael Robbins keep some of their clothes on as they are strapped to pretty evil looking torture devices by the madman. But not to worry they all survive.

Heidi Kristoffer

Rachael Robbins

'Caps and comments by Spaz:

"The Love Crimes of Gillian Guess" (2004)
Canadian black comedy finally aired on cable television last week.

Joely Collins: upskirt, cleavage.

Carrianne Patraschuk: topless.

showgirls: topless with pasties

"Playgirl Killer" (1968)
Canadian bikini-ploitation starring a pudgy Neil Sedeka. Almost forgettable except for french-canadian actress Andrée Champagne who would later go into Canadian politics and has been recently appointed to the Canadian Senate.

Andree Champagne: future Senator wearing bra and panties under shear nightie.

Jean Christopher: bikini, bare butt. That's Neil Sedeka in the first frame.

various: cleavage.

"Erik the Viking" (1989)
Monty Python-esque saga starring Samantha "Miss Moneypenny" Bond as a serving wench.

Samantha Bond: cleavage getting ravaged.

"Sister Blue" (2003)
Canadian thriller only available on DVD in Asia.

Stacy Fair: dorsal nudity, partial boob.

Clare Lapinskie: partial boob.

"Various Positions" (2002)
Recently dug up Canadian drama containing an unheard of topless scene by Carly Pope.

Carly Pope: topless.

"Pleasure Palace" (1973)
The good news is this Canadian softcore porn movie starring future CBC hostess Vicki Gabereau has been tracked down. The bad news is she's the only actress in this movie to keep her clothes on.

Vicki Gabereau: tight sweater

CQ2 (Seek You Too) (2004)
A second closer look at this movie shows some upskirt while Carole Laure's daughter gets gangbanged but it appears she's wearing black panties.

Clara Furey: bare butt then upskirt.

"Firebird 2015 AD" (1981)
Low budget sci-fi which had the only good nude scene removed from the pg-rated video version.

Mary Beth Rubens: topless then upskirt getting ravaged.

"The Usual Suspects" (1995)
Kevin Spacey movie say no more.

Smadar Hanson: brassiere getting ravaged.

"Ed the Sock"
Late night Canadian talk show hosted by a very dirty sock.

Liana Kerzner: co-hostess taking off her toga revealing golden bustier and thong.

hottub lesbian babes: hot simulated lesbian sex.

"Little Britain"
Bodacious British comedy sketch series. The very plump Bubbles de Vere does a very fat full frontal. But she's actually actor Matt Lucas in a fat suit.

Bubbles de Vere: Fat Bastard eat your heart out!

"Degrassi: The Next Generation" episode Venus part two
The lesson of this two-parter is not to pose topless before a camera because the pictures may be uploaded to the internet the next day.

Cassie Steele: partial boob.

Canadian miniseries. Unfortunately these caps are from the syndicated series with the female nudity removed.

Sarah Strange: partial boob in her first nude sex scene.

"The L Word season II, episode Labyrinth"

Monique Ganderton: fully clothed sex on surveillance camera.

lesbian strippers: bra and panties being leered by grannies.

"Rescue Me season II, episode Sensitivity"

Callie Thorne: partial boob riding fireman pole.

"Playmakers pilot"
Someone pointed out the blonde hooker in the threesome is Daneen Boone who specializes in threesome roles.

Daneen Boone: partial nude.

Naked Josh season II
A very dry run. While the first episode had alot of nudity the following episode had none. And the remaining six episodes capped here has established actresses doing fully clothed sex scenes with the no-name actresses showing the actual nudity.

Christina Colburn: boob exposure in episode "The Artist and the Professor".

Kathy Channing: mega cleavage in "The Artist and the Professor".

Laura Jane Mitchell: topless in "The Loneliness Long Distance"

Natalie Brown: fully clothed sex in "The Thrill of the Chase"

Sadie LeBlanc: fully clothed sex in "Fake It Till You Make It".

Clarice Byrne: topless sex in "Making It Work".

Andrea Stefancikova: topless tantric sex in "Making It Work".

Krista Morin: bra and panties in season II finale "What's the Rush?"

Holly O'Brien: tight sweater in "What's the Rush?".

Other Stuff
Talia Russo who is former dancer for the Canadian music video tv series "The Electric Circus" should be posing for hefmag in the near future. Here is a sneak (non-hefmag) preview:

Talia Russo: topless as hangar victim in videonasty "Massacre Up North".

Talia Russo: topless as hooker in "The 11th Hour" episode Cowboy.

'Caps and comments by Oz

"Beauty Betrayed"
Starting with the customary soft-core, we have Beauty Betrayed (2002). Lots of women run around mostly naked including Samantha McConnell, Jane Leno, Tracy Ryan, Keri Windsor, Devinn Lane, Samm Croft, Viktoria Karina and Ava Lake.

Samantha McConnell

Jane Leno

Tracy Ryan

Keri Windsor

Devinn Lane

Samm Croft

Viktoria Karina

Ava Lake

"A Price Above Rubies"
The full frontal nudity in A Price Above Rubies (1998) comes from an actress named Karen Contreras. Renée Zellweger is also supposed to be naked but there are obviously pieces of tape hiding the more interesting bits.

Renée Zellweger

Karen Contreras

"The Men's Club"
The topless nudity in The Men's Club (1986) comes from Ann Dusenberry, Penny Baker, Marilyn Jones and Helen Shaver. From the other ladies, Claudia Cron, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Manette LaChance and Rebecca Bush, there's plenty of cleavage and sex appeal.

Ann Dusenberry

Penny Baker

Marilyn Jones

Helen Shaver

Claudia Cron

Jennifer Jason Leigh

Manette LaChance

Rebecca Bush

Gina Gallegos

"Father's Day"
Some minor pokies by Julia Louis-Dreyfus in Father's Day (1997).

Julia Louis-Dreyfus

"Mad About You"
An upskirt by Helen Hunt in an episode of Mad About You called Ovulation Day (1996). It's the episode where Helen finds another use for a washing machine.

Helen Hunt

"All the Real Girls"
Zooey Deschanel is down to her bra in All the Real Girls (2002).

Zooey Deschanel

Some very brief, blurry nudity by Stephanie León in the Danish movie Scratch (2003) aka Bagland.

Stephanie León

Sophia Myles is supposed to be topless in Underworld (2003) but we only have the rear view.

Sophia Myles

"Sex and a Girl"
Angela Gots gives a brief flash of her nipple in Sex and a Girl (2001) aka Alex in Wonder. Lots of half dressed views of Ellen Greene, Alison Lohman, Soleil Moon Frye and some unidentified nurses.

Angela Gots

Ellen Greene

Alison Lohman

Soleil Moon Frye


Some sex appeal shown by Loryn Locklin in Fortress (1993).

Loryn Locklin

"Ashes and Sand"
It's a similar situation with Lara Belmont in Ashes and Sand (2002).

Lara Belmont

"Bully" star Bijou Phillips topless and gettin' it on in scenes from "Havoc" (aka the movie with the Princess Diaries chick nekkid). Look for it on DVD November 29.

Here is Julianne Moore baring breasts and bum just before really hitting it big. Scenes from the 1993 Madonna movie "Body of Evidence".

Kehli O'Byrne going toples in a love scene from her first movie, "Knight Moves" (1992).

From are some hardcore 'caps of Euro (and part-time American film) porn star Erika Bella.

Here is "Will and Grace" star Debra Messing showing a very brief bit of breast exposure in a couple of scenes from "The Wedding Date".

Movie Reviews


Here are the latest movie reviews available at


  • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
  • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
  • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
  • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

Other Crap
Cruise kills 20 old people because they were glib, and didn't know the history of psychiatry.

WTF??? Haute couture reaches a new height - or haute as the case may be. A model presents a creation by Russian designer Alena Akmhadullina during the Spring/Summer 2006 shows in Paris, Oct. 2, 2005.

You think the Patriots never lose at Foxboroh? Think again. The Pats get their asses handed to 'em at home by the Chargers.

Astros win, get the wild card.

  • Despite a mediocre season, the Astros have a very good chance to go all the way because they have three ace starters who are all in top form. The Rocket is the Rocket. Oswalt is a 20 game winner and one of the best five in the league. Pettitte is 11-2 with a 1.69 ERA since the all-star break. Three guys can only start 2/3 of a team's regular season games, but can conceivably start 100% of the games in a post-season series, and that makes the 'Stros tougher in post season than in the season itself.

Indians lose. Red Sox get the Wild Card

"The common electric socket will serve as your home's connection to broadband with a new chip developed by Matsushita, doing away with all the Ethernet cables or the hassle of hooking up to a wireless network device."

ESPN explains the confusing baseball tie thingy: Ties are only broken on the field only if they determine whether teams make the playoffs -- but not if all affected teams already know they're in.

  • Therefore, a Yankee/Boston tie is not broken on the field because they both make the post-season. However, a Yankee/Boston/Cleveland tie would have had to be broken on the field because one of the three teams would be eliminated from post-season play.
  • As Johnny Carson would have said, "I did not know that."

Got $28 million? Buy the Pitt-Aniston mansion.

Major new films disappoint at the box office.

  • Despite a built-in cult audience and respectable reviews, Joss Whedon's Serenity failed to ignite a box office fire, pulling in an all-too-serene $10 million on its opening weekend, thus falling far short of expectations.
  • In the wake of some scathing reviews, Into the Blue sailed poorly as well, demonstrating that people will not attend movies for eye candy alone.
  • The pleasant surprise of the week was Cronenberg's A History of Violence, which received mostly outstanding reviews and exceeded expectations. It finished #1 by far in the important "revenues per screen" category.
  • Jodie Foster's personal charisma seemed to be enough to hold last week's Flightplan on a steady course for the #1 spot again.
  • Disney's golf movie performed approximately as expected, opening in the #9 slot.
  • The Oscar hopeful Capote kicked enough serious ass ($29,000 per screen) to reach the #20 spot despite being in only a dozen theaters!!
  • Polanski's $60 million Oliver Twist bombed completely, finishing 18th and taking in less than a million dollars.
  • I have warned against comparisons to 2004, which is filled with roller-coaster results, but for the record, this year was down about 25% because last year included a blockbuster opening for Shark Tale and a very strong debut for Ladder 49. Those two films alone did almost as much as all of this year's films added together! In the more sensible comparison to a 2003 baseline, this year was down about 5-6%, reflecting the minimal appeal of this year's two major new releases.


Christ Agrees to Delay Return Until After Final Harry Potter Book Released

India to re-educate snake charmers.

The trailer for National Lampoon's Pledge This!, starring Paris Hilton (Doug Kenney and Michael O'Donoghue must be spinning rapidly in their graves.)

  • "The Gamma Gamma Gamma sorority at the University of South Beach Miami has been deemed the hottest sorority in America by Maxim magazine. The prize: a cover spread and party. The President of the Gamma's is Victoria (Hilton), unquestionably the 'it' girl on campus - beautiful, stylish and rumored to be the richest young woman in the world. The Gamma's are built in Victoria's image - only the beautiful, the stylish and the elite have a chance of getting in. The campus is abuzz about the Gammas and their upcoming spread in Maxim and Victoria intends on taking full advantage of it... for herself."

BENNETT SAYS ABORTING TALK-SHOW HOSTS WOULD REDUCE IDIOTIC COMMENTS ... Former Education Secretary Finds Himself in Middle of Controversy Again

The Trojans win, despite being down 21-3 at halftime. On the strength of 370 rushing yards, they finally ended up with an impressive 631 total offensive yards - including nearly 500 in the second half! - but they really won the game with five interceptions (four in the second half).

You know it's a bad day when you come into the game rated #22 in the nation - and fall behind 28-0 at halftime, allowing the opposing quarterback 283 yards in the first half. That's what happened to Purdue.

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