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Updates:
Charlie's French Cinema Nudity site is updated.
Third party videos:
Denise van Outen flashes some fun
stuff on British TV in an episode of Murder in Mind. (Zipped
.avi)
OTHER CRAP:
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The Daily Show's Jason
Jones ridicules the trench coat, stick-mic
journalism tactics of Cleveland reporter Carl
Monday. Part 1.
...
Part 2
The Rangers' Garry
Matthews Jr. makes one of the greatest catches
in the history of baseball
- Not only does he
twist his body an incredible display of
aerial acrobatics, but his feet seem to be
five feet off the ground at the time!
Screech Sex Tape: "Yes,
it exists. Yes, it's graphic. Yes, you'll be
able to download it soon"
- "Diamond claims
that he made the sex tape a while ago to
show a group of friends, whom he says make
similar videos in attempts to sexually
one-up each other. The group meets monthly
and scores each others' footage, awarding
points for different accomplishments caught
on tape."
DAVID GEST – LIZA MINELLI
SEX TAPE NOT PROVING POPULAR
Esquire crowns Scarlett
Johansson `Sexiest Woman Alive'
Dodger rookie knocks in
nine in 19-11 Coors slugfest
- James Loney's
nine-RBI total has never been bested by a NL
rookie. (Fred Lynn had a ten-RBI game in his
incredible rookie MVP year.)
- The total also tied
the Dodgers' team record held by Gil Hodges.
- Loney had more RBI
in that game (9) than in the rest of his
season. (8)!
- Kid may have some
potential. He 's only 22 and has exceptional
speed for a 6'2", 220 lb. first baseman.
RiffTrax - Mystery
Science head writer and actor Mike Nelson
offers MST3K-like commentary on mainstream
movies
Terrell Owens Suicidal
over Tara Reid Breast Reduction
Excerpts from The
Republican Playbook by Andy Borowitz
Who will play Jon and
Ponch in CHIPS: the movie!
The Daily Show looks at
the Virginia Senate race
The Daily Show looks at
the latest developments in Iraq
Letterman's
"Top Ten Chapter Titles In Jim McGreevey's
Book Presented By 'Former New Jersey Governor
Jim McGreevey' (He's the "gay governor.")
- 'From Schwarzenegger To Pataki:
Governors I'd Like To Oil Up'
- 'At First I Just Thought I Was
Bipartisan'
- 'The New Jersey Budget Crisis -- What
Would Judy Garland Do?'
- 'Politicians Who Left A Bad Taste In My
Mouth'
- 'Why I Don't Like Bush'
Jon Stewart interviews "outed"
governor Jim McGreevey, Part 1
...
Part 2
. McGreevey obviously has a good sense of
humor. He had an interesting chat with Jon
Stewart, in which he claimed that lying (about
his sexuality) for more than forty years was
the perfect training for being a politician!
Jon Stewart on Letterman
in 1994
Update on Screech porno
tape. It just
gets better and better.
"Robert Downey Jr. is set
to star in his first big-budget action movie -
the comic book adaptation 'Iron Man'."
The trailer for Norbit
, another one
of those Eddie Murphy comedies in which he
plays multiple roles.
ComingSoon.net has a new
7-minute featurette about The Guardian
ComingSoon.net has a new
7-minute featurette about The Guardian
The CIA personality test.
- You are going to
think that this is a spoof, but it is not.
Look at the address bar! It is the actual
CIA home page.
The Smoking Gun:
Memo Details
Hewlett-Packard Leak Hunt
Letterman's
"Top Ten Signs The Earth
Is Too Damn Hot"
This week's movies.
Friday update.General
consensus: it's a good week-end to clean your
garage and watch some football.
- The Guardian - 41%
positive reviews
- Open Season - 38%
- School for
Scoundrels - 23%
'Borat' now make benefit
Kazakhstan glorious visit
Karzai/Musharraf Dinner:
Official Presidential Notes
(WHITEHOUSE.ORG)
'Survivor' ends
segregation game
Paris Hilton's pedophilic
new music video, Nothing In This World
- It starts with a
12-year-old boy's head in a toilet and ends
with him making out with Paris Hilton. You
decide which of those things is less
sanitary.
Online anti-gambling bill
hits snags in Congress
Hillary and Condi sing at
the Grand Ho Opry
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Movie Reviews:
Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format.
Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.
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Little Boy Blue (1997)
The idea behind Little Boy Blue probably could have resulted in a good
David Lynch film. Unfortunately, this film was not made by David Lynch.
Jimmy (Ryan Phillippe) is just out of high school. He is set to move in
with his lovely girlfriend (Jenny Lewis) and attend college at her expense,
while pursuing a promising baseball career. That has to be better than living
in a trailer in the Texas panhandle with his crazy veteran father (John
Savage) and his docile mother (Nastassja Kinski), who puts up with all of her
husband's abuse. Yet he decides that he has to dump his girlfriend and remain
at home, because he is the surrogate father to two younger brothers, and he
can't abandon them with his lunatic parents.
In one of several disjointed plot developments which eventually make sense,
a private detective is murdered by the father at the bar where Kinski works.
Our next big revelation comes when Jimmy's father orders him to fuck his
mother. Finally, we learn that dad had his pecker shot off in Vietnam. Since
all three boys were born after 'Nam ended, and we know who has been banging
mom, we have most of what we need to solve the mystery twenty minutes into the
film. The rest is revealed when Phillipe's real mother (Shirley Knight) shows
up looking for her private detective, and a flashback shows where Phillippe
came from. (In the flashback, Kaitlin Hopkins plays the younger version of her
real-life mother, Shirley Knight.)
I tried to watch Little Boy Blue a couple of years ago, but the opening
scenes turned me off, and I threw the disc into the "watch later" box. This
time I realized that the film does get more involving after the first few
scenes because it effectively creates curiosity to see the explanation.
Unfortunately, that resolution is implausible and unsatisfying. The
screenwriter struggled with a way to incorporate Phillippe's outcome into the
outcome of the other characters, and the result was clumsy.
I have several other problems with this film:
- First, and perhaps most important, the script reveals the facts in a
very confusing and irritating manner.
- Second, there is never any explanation as to why Kinski stays with
Savage.
- Finally, the topless scene and incest theme earmarked the film for an R
rating, but both Kinski and Jenny Lewis have sex fully dressed. This
violates the prime directive: "Once you have the R, the tits are free."
This is a C-.
IMDb readers say 6.3.
One Shocking Moment (1965)
Directed, written and produced by Ted V. Mikels (The Corpse
Grinders and many others), One Shocking Moment is a vintage grindhouse
premise, a cautionary tale about rampant sexuality in LA, and how it nearly
ruins the marriage of a Midwest couple. The husband was relocated to L.A. with
a big promotion, and they are soon in a decent apartment with a new company
car. Their neighbors are two female roommates, a great-looking woman who
doesn't much worry about closing her front door when undressing, and a
bi-sexual nightclub owner. The husband gets along great in the new company,
and also begins an affair with the boss's secretary, while the wife sits home
alone worrying. It all comes to a head at a party in "one shocking moment."
I thoroughly enjoyed the clothes. This was just before mod,
and is what I think we called Ivy League. I still have a half inch wide
necktie somewhere. This is what the well-dressed High Schooler wore to dances.
In a few short years, fashion would make its way through embroidered denim
jackets and bellbottoms, Nehru jackets, and then to the leisure suit.
The IMDb score
is 8.7, but I am not nearly as enthusiastic about
this film as the eleven IMDb voters. My IMDb vote would be around 6.5, if they
allowed it, but I must admit that it has a broader appeal than the typical grindhouse effort, making this a real rarity because grindhouse is one of
those genres that seldom has any crossover appeal.
Scoop's notes:
Colorful Ted Mikels is often cited as a strong candidate for
the shiny, imaginary trophy awarded to the worst producer/director of all time, a claim
frequently supported by the nomination of The Worm Eaters, which he produced, as the worst film. The Worm Eaters is virtually a Kurosawa film compared to The
Girl in Gold Boots, which Mikels directed and which is probably one of the ten worst I've ever seen, and
certainly deserves to be in IMDb's all-time bottom 100. (It was once in the
bottom 30, but has since been edged out by the stiff competition. Astoundingly, Mikels
has created another film with an even lower score, The Astro-Zombies! I
haven't seen One Shocking Moment, but I suppose that it will eventually end up
with an IMDB score in the low 4's, consistent with the rest of Mikels's career
directorial output.
His career median is 4.2, with nothing higher than 5.4
- (5.40) - The Black
Klansman (1966)
- (4.90) - The Corpse
Grinders 2 (2000) (V)
- (4.48) - Mark of the
Astro-Zombies (2002) (V)
- (4.42) - The Doll Squad
(1974)
- (4.33) - Cauldron:
Baptism of Blood (2004) (V)
- (4.16) - 10 Violent Women
(1982)
- (3.42) - The Corpse
Grinders (1972)
- (3.28) - Blood Orgy of
the She Devils (1972)
- (3.05) - Girl in Gold
Boots (1969)
- (2.55) - The Astro-Zombies
(1968)
You may notice a twenty-year gap in his filmography. After a slow time in
the 1980s and 1990s, Mikels is making a comeback in straight-to-DVD films in
the new millennium, including sequels to Astro-Zombies and Corpse Grinders! He
was 75 years old when he directed Cauldron: Baptism of Blood, and he's
currently working on another new film. He also has his own website:
TedVMikels.com.
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September Spanish Movie Recap, Part 1
NEW FILMS:
Caps from Tirante el Blanco (2006) ... (4.1 at
IMDb)
* Esther Nubiola
* Leonor Watling
* Ingrid Rubio
* Jane Asher
* Victoria Abril
Caps from Para entrar a vivir (2006) ... (6.1 at
IMDb)
* Macarena Gomez
SPANISH ... um ... CLASSICS:
Flauti wrote:
The following films are "classics" from Spain.
I'm sure that just about everyone in Spain has seen the
farcical comedies starring Andres Pajares, Fernando Esteso, and Antonio
Ozores. These movies were made shortly after the end of the long
dictatorship, in the late 70's and early 80's, when Spain started to
change and to break free from both government and church censorship.
Many films tested the new sexual and satirical boundaries, reflecting
the spirit of rebellious freedom which is found wherever people try out
wings which have long been clipped. The quality of these movies is very
bad (see the IMDb user ratings), but they can be very, very funny. They
are filled with nude girls, men in their underwear, and wicked lines of
dialogue.
Caps from Los Bingueros (1979) ... (4.1 at
IMDb)
* Africa Pratt
* Norma Duval
* Isabel Luques
Caps from Los Energéticos (1979) ... (a whopping 2.3 at
IMDb)
* Sara Mora
* Ajita Wilson
Caps from Yo hice a Roque III (1980) ... (4.5 at
IMDb)
* Belinda Corel
* Mirta Miller
* Loli Tovar
Part 2 of Flauti's Spanish film report appears in tomorrow's edition.
(Two more new films, and three more post-Franco classics.)
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Jo Beth Williams in Kramer
vs Kramer |
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Georgia Anderson in Voodoo
Moon |
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Pat's comments in yellow...
The Transportation Security Administration will allow small amounts of
liquids on planes, but the rule change included another little-noticed
addendum. People may be required to submit to further inspections if they
possess "Items used to augment the body," including gel-filled bras or breast
implants.
* And they suspect EVERY woman of having breast implants.
* Just don't get in line behind Pamela Anderson: you'll be there all day.
Vidar Kleppe, the head of Norway's Democrats Party, is outraged that an
elementary school in the town of Kristiansand ordered boys to sit down to pee.
Principal Anne Gjul said little boys aren't good at aiming and they're trying to
keep the bathrooms clean. But Kleppe wants to make a political issue of it. He
said, "When boys are not allowed to pee in the natural way, the way boys have
done for generations, it is meddling with God's work.
It is a human right not to have to sit down like a girl."
* One of these days, I've really gotta read the Norwegian
bill of rights.
Four female friends at McCulloch Middle School in Marion, Indiana, decided to
wear matching outfits to their eighth grade class for fun. They were suspended
for five days after the principal mistakenly branded them as gang members
* Ironically, the requirement for joining a REAL gang
is to get suspended for five days.
* There's no point in making jokes about a joke, but this
is too good to ignore. Borat
visits the White House to promote Kazakhstan's horse
urine beverages and pubis export industry.
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