"Live Nude Girls"
Live Nude Girls (1995) is a chick flick, but, thankfully, is also a treasure trove of female nudity. 6 women hold a slumber party as a sort of wedding shower for one of their number. The entire film is full of authentic girl talk, mostly about sex and relationships. While there was a certain voyeuristic pleasure in eavesdropping, an some of it was genuinely amusing, I ended up losing interest before the conclusion.
We had breasts or buns or both from Dana Delany, Kim Cattrall, Lora Zane, Laila Robbins, Olivia d'Abo and Cynthia Stevenson. IMDb readers have this at 5.6 of 10. Interestingly, the male and female scores are nearly the same. Berardinelli liked the performances, and awarded 3 stars. There is nothing wrong with the film. If the idea appeals to you, it is well made. C.
|Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
Club Dread: Unrated Cut:
I got conned into getting this. This is a rip-off.
It advertises: "15 added minutes of extended fun, plus over 20
minutes of uncensored bonus footage."
First of all, although that is literally true, it
is misleading. It does NOT include an extra 35 minutes, but an
extra 15, because the stuff added back into the film is also in
the bonus footage, so it's the same additions in both sections,
and the 20 minutes of deleted scenes includes transitional footage
that we've already seen, so there's only about 15 minutes worth of new material.
Second, and more important, this is not material
which was cut to get an R rating, or anything like that. It is
material which was cut because it (a) sucked, or (b) was
unnecessary or (c) both. Most of it consists of a sub-plot about a
couple of cops from the Costa Rican mainland who are summoned to
help with the murder investigation on the island. That sub-plot
was disposable, as the director well knew when he cut it.
The deception is magnified by the DVD box, which
shows Brittany Daniel topless from the rear, standing by a sign
that says "nude beach". That is just a publicity photo that has
nothing to do with the material on the DVD. There is no additional
nudity in the extended version. There is no additional nudity in
the deleted scenes.
FilmJerk.com looks at John Waters's nasty new film, "A
The trailer for White Noise, with Michael Keaton:
"The 'White Noise' of the title refers to a phenomenon
known as EVP (Electronic Voice Phenomena). Listen
carefully, believers will tell you, and in amidst the
white noise of a detuned radio you might hear
voices...and in amidst the white noise of a detuned
television, you might see faces. These, they'll tell
you, are the voices and faces of the dead."
The trailer for Ong Bak: Muay Thai Warrior.
The entire Brady bunch (minus the late Robert Reed) is
back together to celebrate the show's 35th anniversary
with a reunion special, Still Brady After All These
'Sex and the City' star Cynthia Nixon is outed as a
lesbian. That would have made a great plot
twist on the show.
Francoise Sagan, teenage rebel and best-selling
writer, dies at 69. She's the novelist who
wrote Bonjour Tristesse, an anthem to disillusioned
youth that was one of the best-known books of the 20th
'Terminator 4' is ready to start production in 2005.
(Speculation is that Ah-nuld will make a cameo.)
Soldiers' Letters from the Front Lines.
(Satire from WHITEHOUSE.ORG)
GALLUP Poll: Still Close in Florida, Bush by Three
Points (That's less than the margin of
Siskel and Ebert called it "the most disgusting film
ever made", and they've both seen Funny
Lady! A look back at I Spit on Your Grave.
How a new TV series creates realistic baseball action
with computer-generated graphics.
The trailer for ther documentary, Dust to Glory:
"Each year fans and glory-seekers flock to Mexico for
an infamous off-road race covering 1,000 miles of
unforgiving territory. 'Dust to Glory' is the story of
the Baja 1000-the madness and the mayhem."
The Daily Show looks at the new prime minister of
One-time pop sensation Sinead O'Connor was back in the
news Friday - by taking out a full-page ad pleading
for people to stop making fun of her.
Making fun of her? I didn't even know she was still
Gates remains atop list of richest for the 11th
straight year, but looking over his shoulder at those
Sandra Bullock will finally take the plunge into
marriage. She's 40, never been married.
NBC times a new 'Seinfeld' special to mesh with the
Lots of stills from Ladder 49, the Firefighter drama
with Phoenix and Travolta.
"almost non-stop rough, crude and profane language,
full frontal nudity, sexual imagery, obscene gestures,
scatological humor, casual portrayal and descriptions
of deviant sexual practices, a glorification of
freewheeling sex and some sacrilegious imagery."
That's John Waters's new movie, and JoBlo is asking
him about it.
Three clips from The Motorcycle Diaries
Do you know the England of the movies?
Five clips from The Forgotten
The FBI and Department of Homeland Security are
looking for Brimbaw, Texas, which seems to be missing.
Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the ones above,
since it's sorta in real time.
to submit a URL for Other Crap
are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the
review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that
there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written
by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too
ashamed to admit it.
Words from Scoop.
.avi's from Shiloh.
.wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.
NOTE: because of a unique combination of
circumstances with the Windows media player and some substantial
bandwidth theft, we will have to do all of our movie files in zip
format. Left click on the files as you normally would to view a
you get a choice, click on "save", and put it on your hard drive in
the directory of your choice. UnZIP and play from there.
I know this is not especially convenient, but it
allows the film clips to continue. I can protect .zip files from
hot-linking in the same way I can protect still images. For some
reason, if I protect .avis and .wmvs from hot-linking, they will not
play in the Windows media player, and I can't get a satisfactory
work-around. Perhaps I will find a better solution, but for now this
new policy allows you to continue getting the movie clips you want
to see, which is much preferable to my abandoning the clips
Some foreign flavor
Kristien van Pellicom in Innocence . Hey, we
need ICMS to write the commentary on this one. Isn't she Flemish? I
liked this quiet, slow movie, although Tuna was far less
enthusiastic. It's about senior citizens who rekindle a love lost
for fifty years, so it isn't exactly a popcorn movie. Van Pellicom
plays the woman in flashbacks to their youth. (.avi zipped) (.wmv zipped)
Maria Rojo in Esmeralda Comes by Night. If
IMDb is correct, she was 54 when she did this nude scene. (.avi zipped) (.wmv zipped)
GaŽla Le Devehat
in Les Infortunes de la beautť. I don't know jack about her, but I assume
from her IMDB credits that she's now quite a popular TV star in
France. This film was made five years ago, and is her first IMDb
credit. (.avi zipped) (.wmv zipped)
One more, not from Shiloh
Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble
with the codecs for these movies:
FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use
DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use
virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the
vids says the video codec: DivX Decoder Filter & audio
codec: Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with.
When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG
Layer-3. A friend of mine told me about compressing the
audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been
capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this
info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp &
asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using
camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could
never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost
too much to buy in my opinion.
A reader says:
You mentioned that some users were
having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool
designed to determine what codec is needed for a video.
http://www.headbands.com/gspot/ Hope this is useful to you
or your users.
I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9.
The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in
the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly
larger, and slightly lower quality.
'Caps and comments by Brainscan:
Time to check in on the health and well-being of
Hefmates and Pets of the silver screen. Things have
gotten a bit better lately, with movies such as Dorm
Daze, Seeing Other People and Boa vs Python featuring
Hefmates as they were meant to be seen. Yet two of
those movies, Dorm Daze and that Boa thing, have a
couple of gals who've been doing the recent heavy
lifting when it comes to nekkid movie Heffers. They
are Katie Lohmann and Angel Boris.
Got Katie again in Auto Focus. Fully frontally
nekkid, she is. WTF, you ask? Seen Auto Focus, have
you? When did I start talking like Yoda, you wonder?
The answer to a couple of these riddles lies in the
fact that Katie was featured for about a second, as a
gal from Dallas, captured on camera by Bob Crane and
shown in B & W on a teensy-weensy television screen.
So, sure, she's got nothing on, but you'd be
hard-pressed to figure out it was her if ya didn't
Dipping back, way back and even further back in time
we got five other Heffers, cast as women with one
purpose: to show us the goodies.
Slightly back is Pia Reyes in Forbidden Zone: Alien
Abduction, made in 1996. Recall I thought this movie
was so bad that nine babes in the altogether couldn't
salvage it. One more reason to hate it: twas Pia's
last role in cinema.
Farther back is Kym Malin, as the woman whose dress
gets sucked off right before she flies out the chimney
in Weird Science (1985).
Much farther back is Ellen Michaels in Deathmask
(1981). The people who made this movie were so inept
they couldn't come up with a way to move the camera
closer to Ellen when she took off her top. BTW, Ellen
was Hefmate for March 1972 and had, in my opinion, the
most attractive body ever photograhed. Not that you
can tell from these vidcaps. Sigh. Boys and girls,
this was Ellen's only appearance on screen... ever.
And then really, really back there were Mary and
Madeleine Collinson in The Love Machine (1971).
Captured these from the kick-ass clip that Siloh
posted to the Funhouse a couple of weeks ago.
- Mary and Madeleine Collinson
So things are not so rosey when it comes to naked
Heffers on screen; they are even worse for Pets.
We're stuck, then, with Julie Strain and Michelle
Bauer in sequels made a while back. Julie in Psycho
Cop 2, made in 1993, and Michelle in Assault of the
Party Nerds 2, made in 1995.
- Julie Strain
- Michelle Bauer
Where have all the babes gone? Well, the digital
media of the internet and direct-to-market DVDs have
siphoned off a lot of Hefmates, and all the Pets who
haven't gone to or come from the porn world. Every
gal has her own website and a fair number do things
that require them to either strip and wiggle or strip
and pose. No acting talent required. The flip side
of it all is that producers of Skinemax features don't
hire these women if they want to spice up their
products: they hire cross-over pornstars like Diana
Espen (aka April Summers) or Stacey Leigh Mobley
(Holly Hollywood) or a dozen other professionals of
the filmed copulatory arts. These are not happy
trends. If I wanna see "adult film stars" I'll catch
them in their own, revealing medium. Hefmates,
however, were made to be Hollywood's eye candy.
Anyway, here are some strip-n-wiggle or -n-pose
performances by Pets and Playmates.
Julie Strain, again, and Rebekka Armstrong (Hefmate
for Sept. '86) in Hellcats in High Heels 3 (2002).
- Julie Strain
- Rebekka Armstrong
And then from H2OOOH, we have former Hefmates
Anna-Marie Goddard, Jessica Lee, Kalin Olson and
Tailor James; and former Pets Aria Giovanni and Sunny
Leone... Pet of the Year for 2003, I think, and a real
fave around the shop. That H2OOOH disk is a winner,
and I've still got another half-dozen gals to cap from
- Anna-Marie Goddard
- Jessica Lee
- Kalin Olson
- Tailor James
- Aria Giovanni
- Sunny Leone
Thar ya go, me hardies, that's it for now. Avast, ye
maties and shivver me timbers, but this decline in
Hollywood Heffers is really starting to trim my sails
and run me through with a cutlass. A 1972 Oldsmobile
Cutlass, in fact.
NOTE: We currently have to do all of our movie files in zip format. Instead of viewing them online, save the zip files to your hard drive in the directory of your choice, un-zip and play from there.
Another batch of 'caps from the Ghost featuring late night cable regular, Regina Russell. Today we have a few video clips (zipped .wmvs) of scenes from the movie "Sex Files: Pleasureville" (1999).
- Regina Russell...breasts only in clips 1 and 3. Some rear views are added in #3 and there is some bad acting added to #4.
|"Club Dread" didn't exactly work as either a straight comedy or straight slasher flick. What they came up with landed somewhere in the middle, and that's not really a great place to be. However, all is not lost. There are some pretty decent laughs (especially from Bill Paxton as a Jimmy Buffet-type singer), there is some nice gratuitous nudity, and even though Daniel did not get nekkid, she still looks pretty darn good.
||Dragonscan 'caps of Blair topless in scenes from the indie flick "Storytelling" (2001), written and directed by Todd Solondz ("Happiness" (1998) and "Welcome to the Dollhouse" (1995)). Beginning this weekend, you can see Blair playing a stripper with super huge boobs (prosthetics) in the new John Waters movie "A Dirty Shame".
|Nicole Marie Lenz
|Señor Skin 'caps of the former Heffer (March 2000) topless in scenes from "Seeing Other People".
|Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
Pat's comments in yellow...
STUDENTS PUNISHED FOR DORM STRIPPER POLE
Girls Gone Wild II - Three male students at Jacksonville University in
Florida have been punished for installing a stripper's pole in a dorm.
They put up "Pole Dancers Wanted" signs and held a party where a $100
Victoria's Secret gift certificate was offered to the best dancer. Men
paid $5, women got in free, and about a dozen female students competed as
the men took photos. None of the women disrobed, but the three boys may be
charged with violating the ban on indecent behavior. One said, "Honestly,
we just wanted to say we had a stripper pole. We never actually expected
girls to dance on it."
* If he can say that with a straight face, we've found our replacement for
* There were a couple of guys at the dorm who wanted to dance on it, and
that was a surprise, too.
* They'll either be expelled, or they'll switch to business majors.
* Man...When I lived in a dorm, they wouldn't even let us have a hot
RING TONE MAKES BREASTS GROW
Ring-A-Ding-Ding! - Japanese counselor Hideto Tomachechi has created a cell
phone ring tone that he claims makes breasts grow. He says it's based on
two decades of research into subliminal effects of sounds on certain parts
of the brain, and its sound waves send a "positive brainwashing" signal
that makes the brain increase breast tissue. One young model said she
thought it was a scam until her bust grew two centimeters in a week. Even
with no advertising, it was downloaded 10,000 times in one week.
Tomachechi is planning more ring tones that will help improve memory, boost
sexual attraction, grow hair and quit smoking.
And create wealth beyond his wildest dreams.
But his main focus will remain on women's breasts.
If your breasts grow, you start getting more calls, and they grow even
If a girl's phone ringing made her breasts grow, a guy would actually
call her every time he says he will.
FORBES LISTERS GETTING RICHER
But You Probably Pay More Taxes - Forbes magazine issued its annual list of
the 400 richest Americans, and they're richer than ever, with the number of
billionaires jumping from 262 to 313. A spokesman said the list will soon
be all billionaires.
And every one of them will have his own reality show.
John Kerry says he can empathize with people in lower income brackets
because his wife barely made this list.
WEBSURFERS SUFFER WITHDRAWAL FROM INTERNET
ROTFLMAO - The Yahoo-sponsored Internet Deprivation Study asked websurfers
to turn off their PCs for two weeks and report the results. Yahoo said it
was incredibly difficult to find volunteers. Nearly half couldn't go the
whole two weeks, and the median time they lasted was five days. They had
feelings of withdrawal, loss, frustration and disconnectedness; felt out of
the loop, uninformed and cut off from friends; and thought their co-workers
saw them as lazy when they used traditional methods of communication such
as talking on the phone or reading a newspaper.
Besides, they couldn't remember how to dial a phone.
Even more horrible: they had to talk to their spouses!
But the worst part: porn withdrawal.