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Tuna
"Crimson" (1973) from Tuna

Crimson (1973) is a Paul Naschy film. You may remember him from a couple of months ago as the Spanish weight lifter turned actor, director, writer. IMDB thinks it is a Spanish films called Las Ratas no duermen de noche, and, as near as I can tell from the DVD itself, it is a French film originally called L'Homme à la tête coupée. It is in French with English subtitles.

The plot is simple and derivative. Naschy is the leader of a band of robbers. He is shot in the head while trying to escape a botched jewel heist, and a friend of their shady doctor has been researching brain transplants. They need a donor. They kill his main gang rival for the donor, a man known as Sadist. The police, and Sadist's gang, are both after them.

Naschy recovers, but has the strange sexual urges of Sadist, and busies himself molesting as many women as possible, before the inevitable death of the man-made-monster scene. The film as released has no nudity, nor could I find an uncut release, but the DVD contains several deleted scenes with beautiful nudity and some pretty hot simulated sex.

  • An unknown woman shows breasts and buns.

  • Antonia Lotito shows all three Bs as a molested paper boy.

  • Evelyn  Scott shows all three Bs, as Sadist's girlfriend

  • Sylvia Solar shows breasts and bush, but with no head as the professors wife. It is not a double, as we see face in a continuous pan.

  • Gilda Anderson shows all three Bs as Naschy's girlfriend.


IMDB readers are generous at 3.4 of 10. The last two Naschy films I saw were watchable, but this one, especially without the nudity, is a total waste of time, and a bad transfer. F
 

  • Thumbnails (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

     

  • Lotito (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
  • Scott (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
  • Solar (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
  • Unknown (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
  • Anderson (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)
  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    Movies 

    A couple more borrowed from Tuna's infinite collection of Spanish DVD's

    Why Do They Call It Love When They Mean Sex? is a truly offbeat Spanish romantic comedy. Imagine these two components:

    1. A rich kid falls in love with a porn star in her late 30's, and becomes her partner in live sex shows. You think it would be easy to tell mom and dad? His dad is like the dean of a big university.

    2. Although that premise sounds sleazy, it is not at all. They are really in love, and the entire story is a sweet-as-pie girly movie, ala Legally Blonde.

    So, besides me and Tuna, who is in the target market for a porno version of Legally Blonde? In the big romantic ending, after a separation, they have a reunion on Christmas Eve - and make tender love in front of the usual perverts at the peep show. Odd stuff. I have to say that I really enjoyed this movie, I found it very funny and very tender, and really not sleazy at all, but I suspect not that many other people will feel the same way.

     

    Salsa Rosa. A Spanish comedy that really doesn't work very well at all. Basically an Iberian version of a 1950's Billy Wilder comedy, with no elements that are really memorable. It even skimps on the nudity, which is rare for a Spanish film made in the 90's.

    • Maribel Verdu. Spanish actors have to be versatile. There aren't that many of them in the major releases. Verdu played the virginal naïf in Amantes, the same year she played the hot tootsie in this film. She sure has the looks for the hot tootsie role, with her curvaceous body, gigantic mouth,  and sexy full head of hair. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

     

    Updates 

    The following new volumes have been added to the Encyclopedia:

    • Linda Fiorentino
    • Cindy Crawford
    • Athena Massey
    • Claudia Cepeda
    I

    Other crap 

    premiere screening Thursday night at the AMC 42 theater for the Condé Nast Traveler Film Festival - and it ranks right up there with such camp classics as "Showgirls" and "Glitter." The audience laughed, giggled and squirmed throughout the unintentionally hilarious film until one audience member yelled, "Jesus, no! Make it end!"

    Actually, that sounds like one of Madonna's better movies.
     

     

     

    Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or Mick Locke, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    Emmy babes
    A great collection of some of TV's hottest at Sunday night's Emmy's. All the usual formal gown cleavage and occasional leg sightings. Looks like most of the ladies were dress very conservatively.

    Brainscan
    'Caps and comments by Brainscan:

    Scoops,

    Just a few leftover robo-hooters from "Midnight Temptations". Monique Rivera tryin' on some clothes and Jackie Burns, takin' off some clothes and doin' the sport-humpin' tango.

    • Monique Rivera (1, 2)
    • Jackie Burns (1, 2, 3)

    Ocaso
    A great collection of nude Spanish babes!
    • Beatriz Segura, topless full frontal. (1, 2)

    • Cayetana Guillen Cuervo, nude pose with fruit covering the goodies. (1, 2, 3)

    • Cristina Brondo, full frontal. (1, 2, 3, 4)

    • Elsa Pataky, breasts and hints of bush. (1, 2, 3)

    • Marieta Orozco, full frontal. (1, 2, 3)

    • Olivia Molina, topless and full frontal poses. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    • Paz Gomez, rear and full frontal nudity. (1, 2, 3)

    • Silvia Abascal, breasts, bum, and a hint of bush. (1, 2, 3, 4)

    UC99
    Karin Schubert Swedish actress turned adult star showing breasts and bum in scenes from "L'Infermiera nella corsia dei militari" (1980).

    Carmen Russo The former Miss Teenage Italy (1972) shows all 3 B's in "L'Infermiera nella corsia dei militari".

    Nadia Cassini See-thru nipple and bush sightings in skimpy white undies. Also from "L'Infermiera nella corsia dei militari".

    Marianne Basler
    (1, 2)

    Breast exposure plus a hint of pubes in #2. Vidcaps from "Contrainte par corps" (1987).

    Variety
    Laura Prepon
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

    Amazing scans by nmd of the "That 70's Show" star posing for Maxim. Great legs and cleavage!

    Monica Bellucci
    (1, 2)

    The Italian mega-babe bares breasts and bush in scenes from "Malèna" (2000). Thanks to FinnCap.

    Patricia Heaton
    (1, 2)

    The co-star of the CBS hit series "Everybody Loves Raymond", showing plenty of leg and cleavage at Sunday night's Emmys Awards.

    Amy Jo Johnson The former Pink Ranger teasing us with some see-thru nipple visibility.

    Tara Reid The "American Pie" star posing in a see-thru top. Looks like the goodies have been airbrushed out darnit. Nice scan by Squiddy.

    Tera Patrick
    (1, 2)

    The B-movie and adult film star almost givin' up the goods on the cover of Front magazine (link #1), and showing a bit of nipple on the inside.

    Christina Ricci
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    Assorted cleavage scans. #1 is Ricci dressed up, links 2-5 are behind the scenes pics.