Shalako Stars Brigitte Bardot and Sean Connery. For those 6 people in the US who still appreciate the uniquely American art form known as the "cowboy movie" or "western," this is a great find. Not only is it a perfect example of the genre with cowboys, Indians, gun fights, clear distinction between good and evil, good guys in white hats, bad guys in black hats, people shooting other people off of horses, smoke signals, burning arrows, and the typical morality play plot, but Brigitte has a brief topless scene. She is washing at a watering hole when Shalako (Sean Connery) goes looking for her. We see the side of her right breast, her bare back, and portions of her breasts in. This is the 6th Bardot film I have done, and only the third to show any breast at all. Despite her status as a sex symbol, there is just not much exposure from her.

Bardot is part of a European hunting party that includes a former US Senator, and some American guides of dubious loyalty and character (they wear black hats). They are hunting on an Apache reservation, and the Indians are not thrilled. Shalako is a former army colonial who is sent to escort them safely off of the reservation. The Baron who is heading the hunting party refuses to leave, and the Indians go on the war path.

While I don't often watch cowboy movies, even the newest ones which have much more complex plots and fuzzier distinctions between the good guys and bad guys, I do appreciate these simple morality plays for what they are, and must admit that this one held my interest from beginning to end.

You are going to be very surprised by several of the things I say about this movie.

First of all, it's damned good. Forget the low rating at IMDb - this isn't a movie with real broad-based appeal. It's a black and white horror picture which is a perfect homage to the old style Universal horror pictures of the 1930's. It features the same mad doctors with deformed assistants, old castles, horse-drawn carriages, long shadows, quirky minor characters ala Elijah Cook and Peter Lorre, romantic subplot, gothic camera angles, etc

In fact, it is actually an improvement on those pictures. The photography is clearer and more imaginative. For example, people walk into a hallway next to the stairs, and the entire scene is shot from the top of the stairs at a 45 degree angle to the subjects.

Although the plot is derivative, just a hodge-podge of elements borrowed from films shot from 10 to 25 years earlier, this film is the equal to the best from Universal or Hammer. In fact, the only way you can tell it's not from Universal is that the mad doctor actually pulls back the sheet from the female victim on the operating table and we see - breasts! Not for long, but they are there.

Well, maybe one more thing to distinguish it from the classics. The eerie sound track includes a decided overuse of - slide whistles! I have to admit it was very effective for a while, but then he just kept repeating the slide whistle noises, and it got irritating.

Second surprise - it was directed by Jess Franco. Now you all know how much time I've spent bad-mouthing Franco in the past for his constant zooming and his technical flubs and his often boring obsessions. But this film is technically excellent. Look at the sharpness of the images in the collages. And the plot moves along quickly and logically. Ol' Jess could make a real film when he wanted to. (Well, I guess we knew that, because Orson Welles once hired him. By the way, Franco is much indebted to Welles for many stylistic elements.)

This was Jess' first horror film, and he actually did an excellent job. As he later got more and more freedom to control his work, his films became more and more personal statements, and reflected the oddness of the man himself. But this one was slick and professional. It's even dubbed well.

Now bear one thing in mind. This is a beautiful job at making a 1938 picture. But it wasn't made in 1938; it was made in 1962, and everything in the film had already been done, and then people had stopped doing it 10 years earlier. But that doesn't mean it isn't good.

The characters established in this movie became the official Franco staples: the tortured Doctor Orlof, the deformed Morpho, police inspector Tanner. They would make many reappearances in decidedly inferior Franco films.

The main thing of interest in the collages is that the DVD has been mastered from an old French print, so you now get to see the nudity that was cut from the American release.

IMDB summary: 5.3 out of 10. Don't let this scare you off. If you like the Universal and Hammer films, or if you like the old Warner films, this will probably please you. However, if you are a fan of the typical quirky Franco offering, you may not like this at all, since it is more or less a straightforward and traditional picture.

DVD info from Amazon

Here is a very good summary of the movie in general, and the DVD in particular.

Fernanda Tavares

Frederique van der Waal

Kristy Hume

Kylie Bax

Crimony, man, isn't that akin to carping about Jamoca Almond Fudge ice cream because it tastes like coffee, nuts and chocolate? Hope this isn't too much of a shock, but brother: fashion models make Biafran refugees look morbidly obese. Well most do. A few who don't are Estella Warren, Fernanda Tavares, Frederique Van Der Waal (ever wondered if she is related to the physicist who discovered Van Der Waals force? Guess not.) Kirsty Hume and Kylie Bax. So I am posting them today. A child psychologist friend would say I am doing the wrong thing by rewarding your behavior, that I ought to send you an endless stream of Kate Moss pics, instead. But Junior I like you far too much to do that.

Hehe...all in good fun Brainscan!