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Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

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Here are the latest movie reviews available at

  • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
  • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
  • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or Mick Locke, or somebody else besides me)
  • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

"High Season"

High Season (1987) is a quirky comedy full of offbeat characters, and has a rather silly plot. The story takes place on a Greek island. The cast of characters includes Jacqueline Bisset, her teenage daughter, her estranges husband, a close friend who is an art authority, a young man who has turned his father's feta shop into a tourist store, the man's mother who claims her husband should be immortalized as a famous resistance fighter, a British secret agent and his wife, and a whole bunch of tourists. Bisset is a photographer, and her new book, Lights of Greece, is not doing well. She is in serious financial trouble, and has decided to sell an urn given her by the art critic. She has a possible buyer at $300,000.00. Of course, it is not legal to export Greek antiquities, so her agent asks her friend the critic to declare it a fake.

The friend doesn't mind, because it is actually a 19th century fake -- not worthless, but not worth nearly $300K. HE is more concerned that he will soon be arrested, because he collaborated with the Russians during WW II, before the Brits joined the war, and his friends have been found out. In fact, that is what the British agent and his wife are doing on the island. Bisset's husband is an irreverent sculptor, who specializes in cigarettes and ashtrays, but has been commissioned to make a monument to the "unknown tourist" by the young man who opened the tourist shop. Not everyone in town agrees with this project, especially his mother (Irene Papas). 

Bisset goes skinny dipping at night, and we get several dark views of her breasts. Shelly Laurenti shows a breasts when discovered in bed with Bisset's husband. A group of tourists is seen wearing one breast bikini's, and several unknowns are shown topless on the beach. IMDB scores this 5.3 of 10. Ebert awards 3 stars, calling it one of those rare intelligent silly comedies. The score was delightful traditional Greek music, and the photography was a treat for the eyes. I am with Ebert. I enjoyed this one very much, but it will not be to everyone's taste. C.

  • Thumbnails
  • Unknown (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
  • Shelley Laurenti (1, 2, 3 )
  • Jacqueline Bisset (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)




    "Tales of Ordinary Madness"

    Tales of Ordinary Madness (1981) is based on Charles Bukowski's book titled "Erections, Ejaculation, Exhibitions, and General Tales of Ordinary Madness." It could be best described as a slice of life film about Bukowski. This is the same Bukowski that wrote the autobiographical screenplay for Barfly. He was one of the most important of the "Beat" generation poets, who chose to live as a drunk in skid row Hollywood, and claimed that the odd assortment of crooks, whores, pimps, drunks, homeless, and other lowlifes were the only "real" people, and the only ones he felt at home with.

    This story deals with his encounters with several women, including a teenaged runaway, a blonde bombshell (Susan Tyrell), that he met at Venice Beach and followed home , a hooker he picked up in a bar and fell in love with (Ornella Muti), his ex wife and landlady (Tanya Lopert) and a young woman he meets on the beach at the end of the film (Katya Berger). Tyrell induces him to whip and rape her, has him arrested, then drops charges. The ex-wife is constantly locking him out of his apartment, and harassing him. Muti is self-destructive, and is prone to self-mutilation. He falls in love with her, but she finally succeeds in one of her suicide attempts.

    Muti shows buns in two different scenes. Lopert shows breasts and buns, when she is entertaining a man and Bukowski barges in. Tyrell shows all three Bs during the pseudo-rape scene. Berger, as the "girl on the beach," asks him where poetry comes from. He tells her to show him her titties, and he will compose a poem for her. She strips, and shows lovely full frontal. This recitation of the poem is not the first in the film, but is the only one that is somewhat effective. Ben Gazzara does a good job at portraying Bukowski. The film succeeds in that it gives a real feel for this world. It was so effective, in fact, that I needed a shower after watching it. Although it tells who these people are, it gives no clues as to why they are that way, and hence is a very depressing film about a side of life that most people find depressing.

    Since this is the second film about Bukowski in less than a month, I thought I would include one of his poems so those who are not familiar with him could get a feel for his work.


    the history of melancholia
    includes all of us.

    me, I writhe in dirty sheets
    while staring at blue walls
    and nothing.

    I have gotten so used to melancholia
    I greet it like an old

    I will now do 15 minutes of grieving
    for the lost redhead,
    I tell the gods.

    I do it and feel quite bad
    quite sad,
    then I rise
    even though nothing
    is solved.

    that's what I get for kicking
    religion in the ass.

    I should have kicked the redhead
    in the ass
    where her brains and her bread and
    butter are
    at ...

    but, no, I've felt sad
    about everything:
    the lost redhead was just another
    smash in a lifelong
    loss ...

    I listen to drums on the radio now
    and grin.
    there is something wrong with me


    IMDB readers have this at 5.7 of 10. Surprising to me, women score it 7.9, possibly relating to the women in crises who inhabit the film. I was not overly impressed. While it is not without merit, it puts me somewhere I just don't like being, and then has no lessons to teach. Bukowski would probably say that was perfect. C-.


  • Graphic Response

    Be sure to pay Graphic Response a visit at his website.


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