Straw Dogs

1972

Today the Time Machine goes back 36 years to a time when dinosaurs walked the earth and Cher had not yet begun her first farewell tour.  It's always fun to watch this Peckinpah classic again. The stars are a young Dustin Hoffman and the gorgeous Susan George, who shows off her Grade A boobs.

enter the DRAGONSCAN

Brutal Massacre: a Comedy

2007

If you're expecting a comedic horror film, you're in for a disappointment, because it is in fact just what the title suggests, a comedy about the making of a horror film called "Brutal Massacre". And it's pretty funny, filled with insider jokes and every cliché you've ever seen in a horror film.

Famous schlock horror director Harry Penderecki hasn't had a hit in years, so he jumps at his last chance to redeem himself with a film called Brutal Massacre. Unfortunately, that title could have easily described the making of the film, as the crew and cast battle one disaster after another while they struggle to make a typical B-movie horror film filled with all the necessary elements: boobs, blood, and mayhem.

This thing is very funny, especially to celeb fans who tend to watch this kind of film regularly. Although a lot of the jokes are insider-type references, I think most of us will "get it", and enjoy the film. I found it a lot of fun to watch.
 

Scoop's note: me, too!

Emily Brownell	Laura Bozzone
Penelope Lea	Michelle DiBenedetti

Postal

(2007)

"Die Postal: Die Movie"

There are a number of various cuts of Uwe Boll's Postal, they are

(i) the watered down R-rated version running at 100 minutes (which is what we got stuck with as can be seen in the next case)

(ii) the so-called 'unrated' DVD version which is just the R-rated version with 2 extra minutes of deleted scenes inserted into the ending credits.

(iii) the special edition German DVD running at 102 minutes

(iv) a 'director's cut' DVD with 14 extra minutes of extra footage to be released at the end of September, but only in Germany. Schadenfreude.

(v) a watered down UK version still not classified or released and expected to be stripped of all the special features along with the gratuitous gore.

(vi) the real director's cut running at 130 minutes which was shown only on the festival circuit.

 

• Cases (i) to (iii) are detailed at http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0486640/alternateversions

• Case (iv) and maybe (v) is a pending project.

• Case (vi) will have to wait for a Postal Redux release.

SCENE (1): The orgy scene is the same on both the current US and German DVDs.

(i) Julia Sandberg: bare-assed sucking on Uncle Dave's dong.

(ii) Lucie Guest: on your far right sporting some serious camel-toe.

(iii) Michaela Mann: in blue top getting her boobs felt up.

(iv) Holly Eglington: not only is she is topless but she's also bottomless flashing a bit of coochie. What appears to be a thong are actually tanlines evident from her other bare-assed appearances in Naked News and the movie Numb.
 

SCENE (2): The Little Germany scene has a plot hole concerning how Uncle Dave's girls seduced the security guards by giving them blowjobs.

In the US cut (first frame) after the heist Lucie Guest is shown wearing a pearl necklace.

In the German cut (next three frames) there is also semen on an upset Julia Sandberg's face.

In the behind-the-scenes documentary (last two frames), the girls are shown with semen on their faces and how it's applied by a makeup artist. (I thought Uwe Boll would have used a reverse-fluffer).