Python (2000), surprise, surprise, surprise, it about a really big mutant Southeast Asian snake that gets loose while being transported back to the states, and discovers an appetite for horny teenagers. In a slight twist of form, the first two victims who have sex in a tent are both women. We have the standard government expert who wants to save the snake for research, and the baddass federal agent who wants to blow up everybody and everything. And, of course, it is the kids who manage to defeat the monster.

LoriDawn Messuri shows breasts in the opening lesbo scene, and Sarah Mornell shows a breast in a totally gratuitous shower scene near the end. The 90 minutes between the two nude scenes are filled with stupid plot, bad acting, and cheesy special effects. IMDb readers have this at 3.6 of 10. I suppose a monster horror fanatic will find this watchable, but the rest of us can easily take a pass on it. Very low C-, only for movie monster fanatics.

  • Thumbnails
  • Thumbnails

  • Lori Dawn Messuri (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
  • Sara Mornell (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
    Angels in America (2004):

    Six hour mini-series from HBO. Directed by Mike Nichols. Stars Streep, Pacino, Emma Thompson and others in an adaptation of a prize-winning play. Most people thought it was good, but I didn't watch it, except for the Emma Thompson scene pictured here, which featured such blatant overacting that it would have embarrassed Richard Harris.

    • Mary-Louise Parker (1, 2)

    • Emma Thompson's body double. (It's done with a very complex CGI process which they described on their official site, and which we have linked somewhere in the back issues.)


    Other Crap:

    Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the ones above, since it's sorta in real time.

    Click here to submit a URL for Other Crap




    Here are the latest movie reviews available at


    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.


    Words from Scoop.

    .avi's from Shiloh.

    .wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.

    NOTE: because of a unique combination of circumstances with the Windows media player and some substantial bandwidth theft, we will have to do all of our movie files in zip format. Left click on the files as you normally would to view a picture. When you get a choice, click on "save", and put it on your hard drive in the directory of your choice. UnZIP and play from there.

    I know this is not especially convenient, but it allows the film clips to continue. I can protect .zip files from hot-linking in the same way I can protect still images. For some reason, if I protect .avis and .wmvs from hot-linking, they will not play in the Windows media player, and I can't get a satisfactory work-around. Perhaps I will find a better solution, but for now this new policy allows you to continue getting the movie clips you want to see, which is much preferable to my abandoning the clips altogether.



    Here's a light-hearted couple of clips from that wacky comedy, Bridget. (I'm kidding. It's one of those extreme suffering films. The film was never shown in the USA, although I'm not exactly sure why. Anna is kind of a female Hasselhoff, in that she's an American who is far more popular in Europe than she is here.

    The Last Detail

    Early Nicholson film, one of the ones that helped cement his reputation. Rare nudity from the offbeat actress, Carol Kane (Latka's wife from Taxi). The man with her is a very young and almost unrecognizable Randy Quaid.


    Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble with the codecs for these movies:

    Shiloh says:

    FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the vids says the video codec:  DivX Decoder Filter & audio codec:  Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with. When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG Layer-3.  A friend of mine told me about compressing the audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
    When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp & asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost too much to buy in my opinion.

    A reader says:

    You mentioned that some users were having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool designed to determine what codec is needed for a video. Hope this is useful to you or your users.

    Scoop says:

    I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9. The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly larger, and slightly lower quality.

    Crimson Ghost
    NOTE: We currently have to do all of our movie files in zip format. Instead of viewing them online, save the zip files to your hard drive in the directory of your choice, un-zip and play from there.

    First up from the Ghost today....'caps and vids from the grade Z movie, "The Spring" (1989). I first caught this one way back in the day when I ran a video store. The movie was horrible. Slow paced, lame story (finding the fountain of youth), poor transfer to tape (or maybe just really cheap original film stock), etc. The only real plus was that Shari Shattuck looked pretty good, especially in her nekkid scenes.

    • Shari Shattuck, taking a nude swim (#1) and in a love scene (2-3) (1, 2, 3)
    • Shari Shattuck zipped .wmvs. #1 and #2 feature her nude swim. links 3 and 4 are a lame 'love scene'. Link #5 has Shari in a super wet t-shirt with pokies/see-thru views. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    • Virginia Watson, also had a topless scene.
    • Virginia Watson zipped .wmv

    Next up, a few vids (zipped .wmvs) of Skinemax babe Regina Russell.

    • Regina Russell in scenes from "The Big Hustle" (1999). In #1 she shows her breasts in a "sexy cop" scene. In #2 we see breasts and bum in a "naughty nurse" scene. (1, 2)

    • Regina Russell in scenes from an episode of the late night series "Passion Cove". The sport humping is not too bad in these clips. It would be even better if the camera would stop moving all over the place and they took the fast cut count down a notch. 200 fewer cuts would have been nice. (1, 2, 3)

    Mr. Nude Celeb
    Heidi Marnhout
    (1, 2)

    Scenes from the movie "Bubba Ho-tep" (2002) starring B-movie hero Bruce Campbell. Here we see Heidi bending over a couple of times. Once from behind (#1) and then from the front (#2). Upskirt views and cleavage are the result.

    Unknown Some unknowns showing toplessness in more scenes from "Bubba Ho-tep". Click here for the review

    Inés Sastre The beautiful Spanish actress in a topless scene from "Vidocq" (2001). This was directed by Pitof...the same dude that did "Catwoman".

    Rachel Leigh Cook
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    Showing pokies (1-2) a down-shirt view (#3) and side/rear breast exposure (#4) in scenes from the very off beat indie film, "The Big Empty". Click here for the review

    Diana Kjaer
    (1, 2)

    The Swedish actress bares breasts and bum in scenes from the 1971 movie "Dagmars Heta Trosor" aka "Dagmar's Hot Pants".

    Annelie Alexandersson Also topless in "Dagmars Heta Trosor".

    Julia Jäger The German actress showing brief views of all 3 B's in scenes from "...und das ist erst der Anfang" (2000).

    Loulou Robo-hooters and thong views during an appearance on "Chatstation".

    Maria Simon Full frontal nudity in scenes from "Erste Ehe" aka "Portrait of a Married Couple' (2003). Art house movie fans may have seen her recently in "Good Bye Lenin!".

    Saskia Schwarz Full frontal nudity from an episode of German TV's "Ein Starkes Team - Kinderträume".

    Heather Locklear
    (1, 2)

    DeadLamb 'caps of Locklear on Leno. It's really hard to imagine that she's 43 years old! She still looks amazing.

    Carol Connors A ZonononZor collage of Thora Birch's mom topless, giving up gyno-views and giving a BJ or two in scenes from the 1979 hardcore flick, "Candy Goes to Hollywood".

    Linda Molnar
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15)

    Keri Windsor
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12)

    Another batch o' caps from The Skin-man from the direct-to-vid movie "Bare Witness" starring Angie Everhart and Daniel Baldwin. These two ladies both have bit parts as "porn actresses" and we see them strip down to reveal all 3 B's while they make out, lesbo style. The Skinster made these 'caps from a Swedish version of the DVD. I have only seen the US version, but if memory serves there is slightly more nudity here than we've seen from these two before.

    Pat Reeder
    Pat's comments in yellow...

    Hum Dinger - If a Hummer isn't big enough for you, Navistar is introducing a new monster pickup, the CXT (commercial extreme truck), that's 21-1/2 feet long, nearly five feet longer than the new Hummer H2 pickup. The cab is nine feet high, two feet taller than the H2 or the Ford F-350 and just one foot lower than a basketball rim. But Navistar expects to sell only about 50 this year. It costs $115,000 loaded with things like a DVD player and leather upholstery, and gets only 6 to 10 miles per gallon.

  • ...On the highway...Zero mpg in the city.
  • You'll run out of gas looking for a big enough parking space.
  • Mileage doesn't matter: just park it and live in it.
  • You'll have to tear down your house to build a garage big enough for it.
  • If you have a second car, haul it around in this.
  • If you actually buy one of these trucks, then there is a very good chance you just might be...a lotto winning redneck.

  • Here's a link to check out the latest toy for rich dudes with really small penises...or rap stars who need something "a little roomier" than an Escalade or Hummer.

    How To Fart Around And Still Get Ahead - The Wireless Flash reports that the authors of the new book "Going Corporate: Moving Up Without Screwing Up" suggest that if you want to become a big executive, eat lunch out and fart in the copier room. Eating out makes you look like someone important. And since the copy room is well-ventilated to cool the equipment, it's the least detectable place to pass gas, which enhances your "promotional potential."

  • Unless you're passing gas while copying bogus memos for Dan Rather.
  • And if your boss also has a gas problem, you'll get to spend a lot of time with him.
  • This is especially important to remember if you eat lunch out at Taco Bell.

    It's What Kevin Wanted Most - The Daily Star tabloid reports that Britney Spears is going all-out to insure she and finance Kevin Federline have hen and stag parties to remember. Britney is converting her Malibu mansion into a "chick den" for her eight closest friends and will spend $90,000 on a 72-hour party complete with movies, pampering, possibly a stripper, and enough booze so they never have to leave the house. Meanwhile, she's sending Kevin to Las Vegas with seven friends and a suitcase full of cash.

  • They will never be seen again.
  • He'll use the cash to pay child support to all the children he'll father in Las Vegas.
  • The way she's spending money, she's really going to have to cut back on her future weddings.
  • Britney can write off the cost of the stripper as research for her act.

    Oprah's Garage Sale - Monday, Oprah Winfrey kicked off what she called the "Wildest Dream Season" of her talk show by giving away a new Pontiac G6 car to every member of her studio audience -- 276 cars in all. The audience members all needed new cars, according to friends and family members who'd written in, but they had no idea they'd be getting one and they went crazy with joy. The cars sell for $28,000 each, and Pontiac donated them all.

  • If they hadn't, Oprah would've just given away 276 of her own cars.
  • There were several IRS agents in the studio who also went crazy with joy.
  • In a related story, Jerry Springer gave everyone in his audience a can of "New Car Smell."