Millions (1991) is an Italian made film, AKA Milardi, that was evidently shot in both English and Italian versions. The English is not dubbed, but is stilted, as if it were translated from an Italian script. It is essentially a spaghetti soap opera.The impossibly rich head of a family is in an accident, and all the family members try to fuck each other, both literally and figuratively, while he is in a coma. IT might have bee possible to tell who was who, and who was doing whom, from start to finish, but I found myself not caring how each financial maneuver and how each sex act fit into the whole plot line. Maybe I just have a low tolerance for filthy rich people with no morals who speak bad English.

Alexandra Paul shows breasts in several scenes. Carol Alt's character shows buns and a rear gyno view in a long shot diving into a pool. She does turn and half show her face, but it was too long a shot to tell if it was her or not. Catherine Hickland's character shows buns in two scenes, but this is an obvious double, as her wig isn't even close to matching. 4 other women show breasts or buns sunbathing on a yacht. IMDb readers have this at 3.8 of 10. I found it in a bargain barrel for $3.50, and feel I was ripped off. The 4/3 transfer is very weak, the plot dreadful, and most of the acting rather poor. D.

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  • Alexandra Paul (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20)
  • Carol Alt (1, 2, 3)
  • Hickland Double (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
  • Unknown (1, 2, 3, 4)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
    The Principles of Lust (2003):

    You'll definitely get your daily requirement of raunch here, but good Lord is this one bad movie!

    A struggling writer finds himself in a dilemma which involves choosing between two new friends. At the same time the writer meets his new love, a sweet, sexy suburban woman with a good job and a young child, he also meets a new friend from the wrong side of the tracks.

    He's in love with the woman, and realizes that she's the greatest thing that's ever happened to him. She even offers to support him so he can work on his novel full time.

    But the friend represents a range of temptation which the writer has never know before: orgies, gambling, extreme thrills, hard drugs, cockfights in which little boys substitute for the roosters, sexual experimentation. As the movie progresses, the friend keeps stretching the limits of experience farther and farther, becoming increasingly daring and debauched. The writer is seduced by the bloody, lusty, drugged-out world, but is also seduced by the pleasant comfort or a normal, healthy life.

    He finally determines that the two lives can't co-exist, so he has to make a choice.

    I have to give the writer/director credit for one thing. All of the wild experiences are portrayed without censorship. The fighters appear bloody and battered. The women spread their legs and open their genitals for the camera. There are various non-simulated sexual acts portrayed on screen in some graphic detail.

    That frankness, that willingness to portray the friend's world through the writer's eyes without soft-pedaling it in any way, thus allowing the audience to share his shock and arousal, is the film's one saving grace.

    Apart from that it is a brutally ugly movie with a consistently dark and ugly tone, centered on hateful, unhappy characters in an unpleasant world. I felt like showering when it was over.

    I hated this raunchy trash, and I like raunchy trash in general, so you can only begin to imagine how much you'll hate it.

    • Lara Clifton (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

    • Sienna Guillory (1, 2, 3, 4)

    • orgy and stripper chicks and dudes (1, 2, 3)



    Other Crap:

    Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the ones above, since it's sorta in real time.

    Click here to submit a URL for Other Crap




    Here are the latest movie reviews available at


    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.


    Words from Scoop.

    .avi's from Shiloh.

    .wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.

    NOTE: because of a unique combination of circumstances with the Windows media player and some substantial bandwidth theft, we will have to do all of our movie files in zip format. Left click on the files as you normally would to view a picture. When you get a choice, click on "save", and put it on your hard drive in the directory of your choice. UnZIP and play from there.

    I know this is not especially convenient, but it allows the film clips to continue. I can protect .zip files from hot-linking in the same way I can protect still images. For some reason, if I protect .avis and .wmvs from hot-linking, they will not play in the Windows media player, and I can't get a satisfactory work-around. Perhaps I will find a better solution, but for now this new policy allows you to continue getting the movie clips you want to see, which is much preferable to my abandoning the clips altogether.


    An eclectic assortment

    Three more from Shiloh today.

    • Sylvia Miles and Beverly D'Angelo in The Sentinel. You can actually see more of D'Angelo here than on the DVD, because this is the full frame, and the DVD has the widescreen theatrical version which crops off the top and bottom. (.avi zipped) (.wmv zipped).

    • Cristina Raines in The Sentinel. She isn't nude but she's wearing a see-through bra. (.avi zipped) (.wmv zipped).

    • Laura Harris in The Faculty (.avi zipped) (.wmv zipped).

    One more from Showgirls

    Somehow I missed this one when Shiloh sent it in, and a reader reminded me that this is the best, or at least the sexiest, scene in the film. Berkley gets stark naked and lap dances Kyle MacLachlan to a climax. This isn't Shiloh's version, but you'll get the idea.


    Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble with the codecs for these movies:

    Shiloh says:

    FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the vids says the video codec:  DivX Decoder Filter & audio codec:  Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with. When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG Layer-3.  A friend of mine told me about compressing the audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
    When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp & asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost too much to buy in my opinion.

    A reader says:

    You mentioned that some users were having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool designed to determine what codec is needed for a video. Hope this is useful to you or your users.

    Scoop says:

    I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9. The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly larger, and slightly lower quality.

    Crimson Ghost
    NOTE: We currently have to do all of our movie files in zip format. Instead of viewing them online, save the zip files to your hard drive in the directory of your choice, un-zip and play from there.

    Today from the Ghost...she may be a little crazy, but Anne Heche really does look pretty darn good nekkid. Especially in this shower scene from "Girls in Prison" (1994), directed by John McNaughton (who also did "Wild Things")

    • Anne Heche, topless (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

    • Anne Heche zipped .wmv. In this video clip you not only see Heche, but views of other assorted nekkid prisoners in the shower scene.

    'Caps and comments by Spaz:

    "Nothing to Lose" (1994)
    Baywatch's Alexandra Paul plays a social worker with great legs.

    "The Random Factor" (1995)
    Bad Canadian sci-fi and Sliders rip-off.

    "The Riverman" (TV) (1994)
    A&E movie that aired twelve times last week based on Ted Bundy and the Green Valley River killings.

    "Revenge of the Radioactive Reporter" (1991)
    Low-budget grade-D Canadian horror with no-name cast, half of them also doubling up on the crew.

    "Scandale" (1980)
    A couple of the sexually harassed secretaries have been identified in this raunchy French-Canadian comedy.

    "Ski School II" (1995)
    The lesbian bar scene was pretty funny. You may remember the bartender as a naughty nurse from the Beggars and Choosers pilot,

    "Shadow Builder" (1998)
    Couple of uncredited unknowns. The first is full frontal in the beginning in a scene shot after pricipal filming was over (probably to get to get an R-rating). The other was a topless party girl.

    • Unknowns: firston one full frontal, the second topless.

    "Jeremiah": The Long Road part 1 (series premiere)
    Not as much nudity as I expected from the first episode. Let's just hope us Canadians are not getting watered down syndicated episodes.

    "Liberty Street" (season two)
    Model Nahanni Johnstone joins season two... playing a model.

    "Night Man": episode Scent of a Woman
    Supermodel Monika Schnarre returns as space babe from the Planet of the Supermodels.

    "Shades of Love" video series.
    Cleaning up my hard drive on some of the lesser episodes containing only partial nudity of obscure Canadian actresses.

    Still cleaning up my hard drive:

    • Angele Coutu: mega cleavage in the prison stripper classic "Le Party".
    • Sarah Richardson: sexy as singer in the tv series "Madison".
    • Lina Felice: tied up in bra and panties in an episode of "Exhibit A".

    'Caps and comments by Dann:

    Stupid, dumb, lame, campy, clever, funny. All those descriptions apply to this 2004 Canadian Sci-Fi/horror/comedy. The one liners come fast and furious, and help save what is otherwise a pretty bad Sci-Fi.

    Two freshman college guys just wanting to lose their virginity like everyone else meet two sorority sisters, cousins, who seem attracted to them. It's all good until one discovers they may actually be aliens with a sinister agenda. When people start dropping dead (by being frozen from the inside out), he tries to warn everyone, but of course who's going to believe sexy aliens?

    Bad as it sounds (and bad as it IS), it does have many bright spots and a lot of laughs (intentional, I think). Attractive young women are another plus, although they could have been a little more generous with the nudity. Serious Sci-Fi fans may hate it, but for most it's not a totally bad choice for a night in front of the DVD.

    Lauren Pope
    (1, 2)

    Topless in scenes from the cheeky UK series "Mile High". 'Caps by Gman.

    Saffron Burrows
    (1, 2, 3)

    The 6 foot tall, British actress who we recently saw on the big screen in "Troy". Here she is all wet and stripping down to her undies in scenes from the 1999 Renny Harlin movie "Deep Blue Sea".

    Lana Wood
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16)

    Señor Skin 'caps of Natalie Wood's sister and former Bond Babe ("Diamonds Are Forever") baring her big'uns and even showing some pubes (links 7 and 8) in scenes from "Demon Rage" aka "Satan's Mistress" aka "Fury of the Succubus" (1981).