Wednesday

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Tuna
"The Tavern" (1999)

The Tavern (1999) is described as "A touching slice of life drama with a basis in reality" in an IMDB comment. Two men borrow money to buy a tavern, even though they no nothing about running a business. The man they buy it from opens a new joint in the same neighborhood, and takes all the business with them. So they should go broke and loose all their money, right? They do. Kym Austin plays romantic opposite to Cameron Dye, one of the owners, and shows one breast in bed with him.

Ten IMDB readers have it at 7.2/10, but that can't possibly last. There is nothing especially wrong with the film, but there is nothing really right about it either. It is about as exciting as watching paint dry. C-.

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  • Kym Austin (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    "Termination Man" (1997)

    Termination Man (1997) is a direct to vid low budget Roger Corman production shot in Russia with a combined US/Russian cast/crew. It is a spy thriller in the Bond tradition. The Bosnians have released a very fatal nerve gas against NATO troops, and are demanding that NATO withdraw and give them a new sovereign state, or they will gas the rest. For some reason, the decision is up to the UN. Steve Railsback is a scientifically enhanced secret agent, who can dissolve bullets in his system, and heal in a few minutes, and run 10 miles in 30 minutes, leap tall buildings with a single bound, and seduce fellow agent Athena Massey. James Farentino plays the bad guy double agent. Massey shows breasts twice undressing in great light, and breasts and buns in an extended outdoor love scene.

    The visuals are wonderful, mostly because of the DP, Yevgeni Guslinsky. 10 IMDB readers say 2.2/10. Something in the mid 6 range would be closer to fair. They follow the Bond formula to a great extent, including chases, shoot-outs, and clever gadgets. They give a reason for Railsback's ability to survive, have breathtaking scenery, make him a ladies man, and a man of culture. In one scene, he identifies the vintage and estate of a glass of wine from one sip, but fails to identify the fact that it is full of knockout drops, I thoroughly enjoyed this film, but you should not take it seriously. There is a plot to keep you guessing, lots of action, and Massey's boobs each time you are tempted to lose interest. C.

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  • Athena Massey
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
    Four new DVD's. Films without nudity

    Under Fire (Political thriller/romance. Good cast (Nolte, Hackman, Ed Harris ....), good locations, material not as good, simplistic black and white politics, but many people liked it.)

    Bodywork (Brit comedy - in the offbeat vein of Richie's films, absent the wit and style)

    Phantom of the Paradise (Offbeat Brian De Palma comedy from his emergence period, just before Carrie)

    The Fury (This is to De Palma as The Gauntlet is to Eastwood, namely a grade Z script brought to life by a competent cast and director)

     

    The highlight of my day was, without any question, "Armistead Maupin's So Many More Frigging Tales of the City That You'll Get Sick of them Sumbitches", or whatever the latest version is called. I think the correct title is "Further Tales of the City", and it's just four fifty minute episodes of the Showtime mini-series cobbled together into a really long movie. As far as I know, it is not available for purchase. I rented it at Blockbuster.

    I don't know if it was any good or not. It looked awful, but I watched the entire thing in fast forward without sound, so don't take my word for it. There were plenty of willies wafting in the breeze, if you're into that. Let's just say that Bunny guy from the Ed Wood movies would really enjoy it, if you catch my drift.

    Far, far, more important, Laura Linney got naked a lot, starting in the opening credits. I don't know about you guys, but my personal rating system allows for plenty of leeway when a major babe with a great body is waving around some Oscar-nominated breasts and even an Oscar-nominated crotch. Given plenty of naked Laura, I would probably be willing to sit though Jeff Fahey's Naked Hamlet.

  • Laura Linney (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

  • Brainscan
    A moment of indecision. Page 3 babes or Pets? Which should I scan, which should I post? And then in a rare moment of clarity I saw the light: how about page 3 girls who posed as Pets? So here we go with major babes pulled off page 3 and put in Penthouse. They are, if you ask me, among the most attractive women to have posed for that magazine.

  • My fave goes first: Joanne Latham with pics as revealing as any she posed for. A seriously impressive bod. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

  • Second...on the list and in my heart... we have Analiese Nesbitt. (1, 2)

  • Third up is web favorite, Chloe Jones. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

  • Batting clean-up is the less well-known but equally attractive Janine Andrews. Blonde. With legs that reach all the way to the ground. And hooters that every B movie bim would pay good money for. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

  • And the last of the page 3 Pets for the day is the omnipresent Nicole Simmons, who seems to have posed for every magazine except Guns and Ammo at some time in her career. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

  • And for a bonus today we have the most recent Pet, one Stephanie Woods. Lovely Steph made her name posing not for page 3 publications but for Hefmag newsstand specials, including at least one Book of Lingerie. This scan is all the evidence you need to see that Stephanie had a lot more to show than she ever revealed whilst wearing lingerie. There's a lot more of these sort of pics in the Guccione mag.

    Oh, and by the look of many of these pics you can see we should welcome back PETScan. The boy spent the summer in Washington... state, not D.C. A lot better lumberjack than an intern.

  • Schmutzfink
    Annett Renneberg Brief nipple sighting (look in the mirror) from "Engel sucht Flügel".

    Anke Sevenich Breast exposure from "Klinikum Berlin Mitte"

    Sabine Vitua Mega-cleavage, and topless in a sex scene from "Besuch aus Bangkok".

    Variety
    Britney Spears I'm telling ya, she will have her clothes off for the camera sooner or later...and my money is on sooner. Here is an almost nip slip from her MTV Diary thingie.

    J-Lo
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8,
    9, 10, 11, 12, 13)

    Ms. Lopez from a spectacular spread in FHM, by Proteus. Lot's of skin and even some see-thru exposure in this "fun in the surf" theme photoshoot.

    The best links for see-thru nipple sightings are #9, #11 and #12. Links #2, #5 and #8 have decent visibility also.

    #13 has a side view of her famous caboose, and #3 has an inviting, open legs view.

    Victoria Addams Looks like Posh Spice has been taking some fitness and fashion tips from Pam Anderson! Super thin body, really big boobs, skin tight clothes, and don't forget the pokies!

    Amanda Cleveland Topless (almost frontal) shower scene from the Brian De Palma movie, "Blow Out" (1981)

    Click here to read Scoop's review of the rare occasion in which the phrase "good Travolta movie" can be used.

    Julianne Moore A very low cut dress with some partial breast exposure from "Hannibal". Vidcaps by Watty.

    Viewer Requests
    Scoops....

    I saw a magazine the other day called "The Edge"--one of these pseudo-Maxim/FHM things. Looked like it had something a spread of Kimmi from Survivor, she was on the cover. Anyone out there have any scans, or know where we can get them?


    Click Here!