Contact junior by writing Contact Scoopy by writing Contact Tuna by writing Send submissions to

Search by keywords:
In Association with
Use this search device to seek additional information from about any of the books or movies you read about here.

To see and use all the Funhouse features, you need Netscape 6.+ or MSIE 5.+.

"The Prowler"

The Prowler (1981) is a low budget ($1M) slasher with one of the classiest opening segments I have seen in a small film. It starts with stock footage of the Queen Mary, all 83,000 tons of fun, returning troops to New York. They hired an actual newsreel narrator, then in his 80's, to do the voice-over, and he talks about how some are resuming their life, some have psychological problems, and some, who got Dear John's, have to start a new life. Cut to color, and Cape Avalon (actually Cape May, New Jersey), still 1945, and the daughter of the wealthiest man in town writes a Dear John to her absent boyfriend. Preparations are under way for a college graduation dance, and we see perfect period views of the exterior and interior of a colonial hotel, complete with period cars and costumes. The dialogue was also appropriate to 1945. Someone murders the wealthy girl and her new boyfriend with a pitchfork. Roll opening credits, and cut to ...

Present day, and preparations are being made for the first graduation dance since 1945. Predictably, the killer, known as the prowler, dusts off his pitchfork, and goes to work. When we finally find out the identity of the jilted lover murderer, it comes totally out of left field. Nothing in the story would lead you to suspect. Lisa Dunsheath, former model and psychiatric nurse, who also worked as a Heffer in the SF mansion, did a nude shower and death scene. It was very hard to cap, as there is a shower door and lots of water and steam much of the time, but we get fairly clear view of her breasts.

After the great start (which ate a lot of the budget), the film was a huge disappointment, and ended up a barely acceptable entry into the teen slasher genre. IMDB readers say 4.1 of 10. The DVD is well done, and includes lots of special features, but the transfer is what you would expect from a low budget film shot in the early 80's. C-.

  • Thumbnails
  • Thumbnails

  • Lisa Dunsheath (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17)

    "The Hills Have Eyes Part II"

    The Hills Have Eyes Part II (1985) is Wes Craven's follow-up to The Hills Have Eyes, and most agree that he should have quit after one, as the original was made for $230k, and is rated 5.6 at IMDB. This sequel cost $1M to make, and is rated 3.2. Even factoring in 8 years of inflation, he produced far more for the money in the original, and he even recycled several minutes of footage in flashback scenes. The plot, of course, requires a way to get some kids back into the desert, off the main road, and into the bombing range, so they can encounter the cannibals. They are going to a motocross race, forget about the change from Daylight Savings to standard time, and cut across the dessert to make up the hour. All that's left is to puncture the gas tank at just the right spot, and you can have the bad guys and good guys stalk and kill each other any way you think looks cool.

    Two women show breasts in night scenes, Penny Johnson of General Hospital fame, and Colleen Riley. Videograve, in one of the few reviews, said, "A bunch of annoying dirtbikers going to a race get caught in the desert and are terrorized by the cannibal families last two surviving members. Miserable writing, awful acting and sloppy execution make this one bad sequel." Amen. D.

  • Thumbnails

  • Colleen Riley (1, 2, 3)
  • Penny Johnson (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    We conclude the tribute to the ultimate celebrity nudity movie, Sirens. Today's collages feature the two non-famous members of the cast, Kate Fischer and Pamela Rabe


    Other crap




    Here are the latest movie reviews available at

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or Mick Locke, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    'Caps and comments by Brainscan:

    Today we have some scans of Chieko Shiratori, selected from her three books of nekkid poses. They are Don't Panic, the eponymous Chieko Shiratori and the latest, Sirene. We got boobs, bum and in the last collage from Sirene, we got good ol' bush.

    • Chieko Shiratori (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

    I watched the VMA awards with my teenage nephew and we both agreed that Christina Aguilera had graduated from skank to slut, BUT neither of us dared look away while she was on the screen. Excellent career path. And we had this discussion of the difference between an asshole and a douche bag. Both are unpleasant but one is deliberate, usually intelligent and always under control whereas the other is accidental, mindless and painfully outside of any self-control. An asshole you can admire; a douche bag is pathetic. We also agreed that Emminen is no longer an asshole; he's a douche bag.

    Lorissa McComas
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)

    A few scans of the Skinemax regular by Scorpion.

    Here's the breakdown:
    Topless only...Links 1,4,5,6,8 and 10. Breasts and pubes...Links 2,7 and 11. Rear nudity...Link #9 See-thru pubes...Link #3

    Claudia Karvan
    (1, 2)

    The Aussie actress baring breasts and showing off some great legs in scenes from "Risk" (2000), by Swedeo.

    Sabrina Ferilli
    (1, 2, 3)

    The busty Italian actress shows off her all natural big'uns in scenes from "La Bella vita" (1994). Swedeo also added some thong and bra views.

    Joey House
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    Topless 'caps from the movie "Diary of a Sex Addict"

    Antoinette Valente The completely obscure and unknown actress bares all in scenes from the movie "Red Letters" (2000). A special thanks to Nicnac for enduring an extended tour of duty in the Vault of Obscurity in order to come up with this one.

    Peta Wilson
    (1, 2)

    Two sexy poses as scanned by Squiddy. #1 has Peta showing some wet-see-thru-pokies, and #2 features a hint of areola.

    Cynthia Gibb
    (1, 2)

    Huge collages by The Goose featuring skin from the Rob Lowe/Patrick Swayze hockey movie, "Youngblood" (1986). #1 highlights Gibb's bum, #2 is for the breast men.

    Asia Argento
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)

    A few non-nudes of the "xXx" star from Rolling Stone.