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"Don't Look Now"

Don't Look Now (1973) is a Mystery/Thriller/Horror film Staring Julie Christie and Donald Southerland, and based on a novel by Daphne Du Maurier. The two lost a young daughter to drowning, and are now living in Venice, where Southerland works restoring churches. Christie hasn't yet recovered from her daughter's death. Things change when she meets two sisters, one of whom is blind, but has "second sight," and tells her that her daughter is with her, and is happy. She also says that the daughter warns that Southern should leave Italy, because his life is in danger. There is a killer on the loose, as evidenced by bodies turning up in the canal.

Christie leaves to catch a plane and check on their son at school in England. Southerland thinks he sees her shortly after on a boat with the two sisters, and reports her disappearance to the police. For the rest of the film, he tries to find her, often missing her by only moments, as she is trying to find him since her return from England.

This film is rated 7.5 of 10 at IMDB, and rotten tomatoes has 100% positives. It won a BAFTA for best cinematography, and was nominated for 5 more. The shots of Venice were gorgeous, and the shot that started Julie Christie's exposure was very impressive, shot in a bathroom with opposing mirrors. I have no idea how they kept the camera out of frame. The sex scene between Southerland and Christie is considered one of the best filmed in a mainstream film. The sex scene is seen in a series of flashbacks as the two of them get dressed afterwards. The depiction was very realistic. Christie shows breasts and bush in the tub, breasts and buns in a mirror, then breasts, buns and possible bush during the sex scene. I apologize for the graininess on the sex scene, but it was very dark. The film was very slow starting, but did have a genuinely creepy atmosphere once it got going. This is a B-.

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  • Julie Christie (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30)

    "The Toolbox Murders"

    The Toolbox Murders (1978) is a slasher staring Cameron Mitchell as the bad guy. After his daughter dies in an accident after being hit by a drunk driver, he starts killing evil, immoral women, feeling that, once he kills all the evil, only good will be left. He also kidnaps a young girl, ties her to a bed, and pretends she is his daughter. All of the murder weapons come from his handyman toolbox, including an electric drill, a nail gun, and a claw hammer.

    Producer Tony Didio noticed that Texas Chainsaw Massacre was in it's second theatrical release, and called the distributer to see how that was possible. He was told that the genre was a sure money maker, so he got a skeleton crew, held a Chainsaw screening for them, and ask them to write a script to appeal to the same audience. They based the story very loosely on actual events.

    The first victim, Marciee Drake, showed breasts, first through a wet top, and then changing. The second victim showed everything including full frontal, in a long scene that included a bath, complete with masturbation, running from the murderer, trying to reason with him, getting shot with the nail gun, and then dead both in her apartment, and at the morgue. She was credited as Marianne Walter, which is actually her birth name. She had been in LA doing modeling and some double work, mostly in commercials, when she was offered the part. She was thrilled, as her face would finally be on camera, she got to do a death scene, and horror was her favorite genre. Although they saved the masturbation part of the role as a surprise on the day they shot the bathtub scene, she took it in stride. After this film, she went on to become Pet of the month, and then the major porn star we know as Kelly Nichols. He credits include several of my favorite adult films, most notable In Love. She is no longer performing in front of the camera, but is still in the business doing make-up in both mainstream and adult films.

    This is a typically bad slasher film, and the 3.5 score at IMDB reflects that. On the other hand, it is not much worse than is typical for the genre. They did reveal the identity of the killer early on, which ruined most of the suspense. The nudity is first rate, and the acting was better than the script deserved. C-.

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  • Kelly Nichols (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35)
  • Marciee Drake (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)


    We continue the tribute to the ultimate celebrity nudity movie, Sirens. Today's collages feature Tara Fitzgerald, who has done her fair share of nudity over the years.


    Other crap

    my favorite:

    They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist. . . .
    Killed in battle during US Civil War.
    ~~ General John Sedgwick, Union Commander, d. 1864

    • The Guardian warns of software which can be used by your boss or parents to monitor your internet activity. Note that the article is somewhat misleading in that it implies that you boss can install it on your computer merely by sending you an e-mail. In truth, in order to install the software on a remote computer, two things have to happen to that e-mail (1) the e-mail recipient has to accept the attachment (either willfully or through local settings) and download it as a separate file to their hard drive, and (2) they must later somehow chance upon it and click on it. "Oh, gee, an unfamiliar .exe file. Let's see what that does."  (The authors recommend naming it something like MyPhotos.exe to lure people into clicking on it). The chances of that happening in this day and age are slim to none, so this presently represents no threat except to the completely stupid.  However, it is only a matter of time before somebody figures out how to deliver the Trojan more elegantly without the clumsy steps, which will make this a pernicious invasion of privacy.




    Here are the latest movie reviews available at

    • The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
    • If there is a white asterisk, it means that there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined there might be something else of interest.
    • A blue asterisk indicates the review is written by Tuna (or Lawdog or Junior or C2000 or Realist or ICMS or Mick Locke, or somebody else besides me)
    • If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too ashamed to admit it.

    'Caps and comments by Brainscan:

    We took a look at Chieko Shiratori on Friday, so today we have two other babes in "Metropolitan Police Bureau 82".

    Tomomi Kuribayashi plays Chieko's partner, a fact that Chieko's character finds a tad difficult to deal with. This is, at heart, a buddy cop movie with chicks and guns, a sort of Lethal Weapon meets Charlie's Angels, as directed by Andy Sidaris. Tomomi shows boobs and bum in very clear light, with super-close-up stuff going on. First collage is a combination of the DVD cover plus a promotional still of the first scene, showing Tomomi and Chieko topless. The rest are mostly single frames and also a few doubles and triples. Boobs throughout, bum in the second and third. Last one of Tomomi's collages shows her sport-humpin a guy, but his action involves a serious attempt to jam Tomomi's breast through her lung and out her dorsal surface. Yikes, pardner, take it easy there.

    The third babe of the movie is Hitomi Shimizu, who plays the big bad crime boss, female variety. Her whole operation is staffed by women, which leads to some first-rate cat-fighting at the end of the movie, when inevitably, Chieko rescues Tomomi from the evil wenches. All you need to know about the movie is distilled into a two-minute fight scene. Chieko barely wins out over one of the wenches and as she, the baddie, stands around helpless, Chieko methodically re-loads her 14-shot .45 caliber hand-gun and blows the baddies brains onto the adjacent wall. It was soooo predictable it made me laugh. Kinda like Marvin getting shot in Pulp Fiction. Anyway, Hitomi is a scrawny little thing but right pretty (or is that "purdy"?). Three collages: the first two dominated by frames of Hitomi's hooters as she receives oral pleasure from her one male underlining (that's how you know SHE is the boss: receiving rather giving); the third shows the two of them post-coital. He is wearing patterned nylons because he dressed like a woman to escape the police. But he kept them on through all the het action and that says more about the writer, director and actor than I cared to know.

    • Hitomi Shimizu (1, 2, 3)
    Susanne Uhlen
    (1, 2)

    Pokies while only wearing undies in scenes from "Zu Dir Oder Zu Mir"

    Franziska Walser Topless and full frontal views in "Im Chaos der Gefühle" (2002).

    Lydia Pirelli UC99 adds:

    Lydia hosts a weekly call-in/quiz/game/sex/nonsense show on the German "9 Live" channel. Worst trash show on earth. Simply fantastic!

    Gwyneth Paltrow In her undies and a little lesbo kissing in scenes from "The Royal Tenenbaums" (2001).

    Melissa George More mild lesbo action as the beautiful blonde Aussie locks lips with Laura Harring in scenes from the David Lynch movie "Mulholland Dr.".

    Naomi Watts
    (1, 2, 3)

    Keeping the lesbian theme alive with Naomi making out, and getting in bed with Laura Harring in "Mulholland Dr.". Both Watts and Harring show some very nice breast views.

    Halle Berry
    (1, 2)

    The Oscar winner and soon-to-be Bond Babe looking great in these non-nude (but sorta revealing) images from the September issue of Cinema magazine.

    Jennifer Lopez J-Lo grabbin' her boobs and making some nice cleavage.

    Diane Lane
    (1, 2)

    Longtime Fun House and personal Jr favorite, briefly baring a breast in "Descending Angel" (1990). Currently this is only on VHS, so "props" to the Skinmiester.

    Susan Ward
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    Excellent toplessness in deleted scenes from the movie "The In Crowd". Thanks to Señor Skin.