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"Last Stand" (2000)

Last Stand (2000) is a grade Z Czech production distributed exclusively in the US by Blockbuster. This one is a post-apocalyptic actioner. Kate Rodger is serving a long sentence at hard labor for killing her superior officer who was:

1) An asshole
2) A coward
3) A threat to her entire squad
4) Son of a General
5) All of the above

The correct answer, of course, is 5. She is given a chance to redeem herself by going to Earth, toppling the most ruthless asshole left on the planet, and rescuing the son of a General. In return, they will excuse some of her sentence. So, does she:

1) Get captured and escape
2) Fall in love with the general's son
3) Show her breasts in a dark grainy sex scene
4) Kick asshole ass
5) Live happily ever after with the General's son

You guys are too good for me. It is all of the above, of course. Along the way, we are treated to unknown breast exposure, torture, action, cheesy special effects, dark and grainy photography and terrible acting. D-.

  • Thumbnails

  • Kate Rodger (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
  • Unknown

    "Sweet November" (2001) revisited.

    Due to reader request, I have added Lauren Graham (Gilmore Girls) to the images from Sweet November. She appeared in the beginning of the film getting out of bed with Keanu Reeves and complaining about his being a workaholic and not really being in a relationship with her. While she doesn't really show anything (first she is covered by sheets, then wears a substantial bra and panties), this is likely to be the best we see from her for a long while. The scene had one of those post-production blue filters, but the blue came right back out.

  • Thumbnails

  • Lauren Graham (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    Most of the criticism about American Pie 2 has centered on 

    • it isn't as good as .....

    • some of the characters are pushed aside and undeveloped.

    So let me deal with those points in order.

    1. Yes, true. How could it be as good? How many other youth sex comedies have been as good in the past two decades? Roughly none.

    2. Yes, but there is a good reason. It's a sequel. The screenwriter wanted to provide continuity with the original, so he included all the major characters. Some of them were not funny, however, so he placed them far in the background, and zoomed in on some funnier minor characters. That's the exact same thing you and I would have done. For example, if it wasn't a sequel, the unfunny character of Oz would have been written out entirely. But it was a sequel, so the writer included Oz, but reduced his role. 

    Looking at it out of context, treating this movie as a stand-alone story, it seems that Oz is an undeveloped character, but I don't see where there were better choices.

    Having said all that, let me add that I laughed a lot at AP2, although they spoiled some of the best material with the trailer. If it isn't as good as AP, it is better than any of the others in this genre which have come along recently.

    Sorry, I haven't found any bootlegs yet.

    Killer Instinct is the cliched "locked in a haunted house overnight" movie, hybrid with the cliched "Michael Myers escaped from the asylum and will get revenge for what happened in the past" movie. And the big star is Corbin Bernsen. Pretty scary, eh kids? Aroooooooooooooooooooooo!

    Despite good performers and solid production values, Sweet November was a chore to sit through. As you regulars may know, weepy ass dyin' woman movies are not my favorite genre, nor are "kooky woman gives new insights to uptight asshole" movies, nor "cute little doggie movies", nor "fatherless kid" movies, nor "offbeat neighbor with kinky lifestyles" movies. This one is all of the above. Oh, the horror. Oh, the humanity.

    Here's a tip for you youngsters. If you're going to spend forty million dollars on a movie, spend an extra $100,000 to hire a writer.

    But, to hell with the movie. The more important issue is that the bathtub love scene seems to be lost forever. There are no deleted scenes on the DVD. 

    If you don't know the story behind that, it's a strange one. In a rare case of role reversal, Keanu and Charlize were disappointed that the nude scene was cut, because they thought it was a beautiful moment, and they were both proud of what they had brought to their characters in the scene. Unfortunately, the bigger fish wanted a PG-13 movie. Sigh. The film actually has a bit of nudity here and there, hidden like buried treasure.

    • Charlize Theron (1, 2)

    Tuna nailed Cutter's Way in  his review. In many ways, the film is weak, but it is filled with scintillating, intelligent, cutting dialogue that serves to redeem the project. Think of it as a Tennessee Williams play - forget about the plot and get into the emotions of the characters, and the poetry of the dialogue that expresses it. The images are good as well.

    Graphic Response
  • Angelina Jolie, another look at Jolie's nude scene in "Original Sin".

    Be sure to pay Graphic Response a visit at his website.

  • Oz
    "In a Savage Land"
    In a Savage Land is an Australian movie mainly set towards the beginning of WW2 in New Guinea. Maya Stange plays an anthropologist who is studying the natives. She goes 'native' for a while and that explains the body 'painting'. As you might imagine, there is a lot of topless nudity by the natives. Rose Vaia is one of the few that is named.
  • Maya Stange (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
  • Rose Vaia

    The topless collages of Julie Andrews and Rosanna Arquette have appeared numerous times in the Fun House. Not quite so common is Marisa Berenson and some unknown party girls.

  • Julie Andrews
  • Rosanna Arquette
  • Marisa Berenson
  • Assorted party girls

    "Sex 'n' Death"
    Sex 'n' Death is an enjoyable British film that is a parody of some the current genre of extreme game shows. Sex is predominant and there are some unknowns stripping off to win a prize. Most of the named actresses keep their clothes on, or at least their underwear. Paula Bacon and Natasha Bell are two prostitutes involved in a double-barreled sting. Jane Peachey shows us some nice cleavage and Caroline Goodall shows that she needs a body double, and has one.

  • Paula Bacon (1, 2)
  • Natasha Bell
  • Jane Peachey
  • Caroline Goodall
  • Unknowns (1, 2)

    "Chapter Zero"
    Chapter Zero doesn't have any nudity but has some nice cleavage shots of Laurel Holloman, not that there is much there. Penelope Ann Miller also does a nice seduction scene in some skimpy lingerie.

  • Laurel Holloman
  • Penelope Ann Miller (1, 2)

    "Loser Love"
    Continuing with Laurel Holloman, in Loser Love she plays a pathetic, abused lover. Again, no nudity just Laurel in the underwear.

  • Laurel Holloman

    "Playing the Field"
    Some other caps of Debra Stephenson in the TV series Playing the Field have appeared before. The show is about a women's soccer club in England. These topless caps are from one of the later episodes.

  • Debra Stephenson

    "Armed and Dangerous"
    Very little nudity in these caps from Armed and Dangerous. Meg Ryan looks nice in her underwear and Christine Dupree plays a pay-booth stripper. There is nudity if you look carefully in the reflection in the glass. Judy Landers plays a blonde bimbo (I'm not sure if there was any acting on her part) and there's the slightest hint of nipple exposure when she demonstrated that there was no tan line.

  • Meg Ryan
  • Christine Dupree
  • Judy Landers

    "An Unmarried Woman"
    I probably got a little carried away with the number of collages from An Unmarried Woman. It's just that she was in her underwear and topless in such a lot of the film.

  • Jill Clayburgh (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

    "Mortal Thoughts"
    No nudity by Demi Moore in Mortal Thoughts, just a blood-soaked top in her pre-silicone days.

  • Demi Moore

    Breakout is the story of an outbreak of a deadly virus and we see a topless Lisa Kelly in hospital on a life-support system.

  • Lisa Kelly

    Sheryl Lee shows some see-through nudity in Homage. The films opens with her death by a infatuated stalker and the rest of the film shows the events leading to the shooting.

  • Sheryl Lee

    "Ricky Nelson: Original Teen Idol"
    There's just the briefest of nipple exposure by Tara Rosling in the Ricky Nelson biopic.

  • Tara Rosling

    "Great Balls of Fire"
    Winona Ryder doesn't show much in Great Balls of Fire, she's just shown in her bra.

  • Winona Ryder

    "Living in Peril"
    Again, no nudity by Alex Meneses, just some nice cleavage and an upskirt.

  • Alex Meneses

  • PAL
    Welcome back PAL!

    Mirto Alikaki
    (1, 2)

    Topless 'caps of the Greek actress in scenes from "Black Out".

    Senta Berger Topless in "Ritratto di borghesia in nero".

    Jacqueline Bisset Very odd, but nice breast exposure in scenes from "The Mephisto Waltz" (1971).

    Christine Boisson Wearing an unusual bra with clear nipple exposure in "En face".

    Bobbi Burns Topless sunbathing from 1982's "Q". aka "Q The Winged Serpent".

    Christobel d'Ortez Topless in "Wild Zone".

    Ines Estevez The busty actress from Argentina going topless and showing a hint of pubes in scenes from "Matar al abuelito" (1993).

    Judy Geeson The British actress in a topless scene from 1968's "Here We Go Round the Mulberry Bush"

    Helen Mirren Breast and bush sightings in "Cal" (1984).

    and ...
    Halle Berry
    (1, 2)

    The other scene from "Swordfish"...Excellent 'caps of Halle in her undies, by Penman.

    Jennifer Aniston Great 'caps of Jennifer nude, by The Night. These are from an episode of "Friends", so of course there are no goodies, but still worth a look if you're a fan.

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