* Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).

* White asterisk: expanded format.

* Blue asterisk: not mine.

No asterisk: it probably sucks.


Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.








The Darwin Awards


Joseph Fiennes is a police profiler with the San Francisco PD, but has a major weakness as a cop. He faints at the site of blood. When this allows a serial killer to escape, the force decides to let him go. He eventually seeks employment as a profiler for an insurance company, and sells them on the idea that he can profile likely Darwin Award winners, thus saving the insurers a fortune. The Darwin Awards recognize individuals who improve the human gene pool by removing themselves from it with silly, preventable deaths.

Fiennes is teamed with their best investigator (Winona Ryder) and they go through a series of suspicious deaths trying to prove that they were in fact Darwin material, and looking for a common thread among the deceased.  Of course, the escaped serial killer is still central to Fiennes' thoughts.

This film played Sundance, but failed to ink a theatrical distribution deal and went straight to video. I was curious to see how the Darwin Awards would translate to film and found it a rather fast watch, although I probably won't watch it again anytime soon.

  • IMDb readers say 5.2, and the score dips to 3.7 from the top voters.
  • Critics weren't kind. 20% positive reviews, per RT.




The exposure is a nipple from Juliette Lewis in a long sex scene, the night before her husband attaches a JADO rocket to his Chevy, and ends up launching himself into the side of a mountain.

Scoop's note: video in yesterday's edition.







"Inside Out: Brush Strokes"

Today the Time Machine travels back to 1992 for an old softcore series "Inside Out." In the episode called "Brush Strokes," one of my personal favorites, Barbara Alyn Woods, shows off the breasts and then has her body painted, hence the title.







Notes and collages

That Obscure Object of Desire


Carole Bouquet

She was a Bond girl in "For Your Eyes Only"










Lonely Hearts


The movie tells the story of the Lonely Heart Killers, a couple that went in a killing rampage back in the 40s, as played by Jared Leto and Salma Hayek. The co-stars include Tony Soprano and Barbarino as the cops pursuing them.

  • It had a very limited theatrical release in April: 24 theaters, $188,000
  • 6.6 at IMDb, about the same from the top voters.
  • 47% positive reviews.



Shannon Murphy


Alice Krige


Salma Hayek











LC's film clip of Lydia Leonard in True True Lie. (The sample to the right has appeared in earlier editions.)
Three short film clips of Sandrine Bonnaire in Le Meilleur de la vie, a full frontal appearance rare enough that it does not even appear on Charlie's site!
Catching up on Russia with some short film clips:







This "seen it all before" musical drama from 2006 is disappointing because the plot is very well-worn, the script is not great, the acting is not convincing, and the story wanders all over the place, leaving us confused about what the central theme really is. On the up side, Roselyn Sanchez is very hot, although like many of her fellow actresses, she plays a stripper that barely strips. Barely is better than nothing, however, and she does do some nudity.

Amaryllis has been dancing since childhood, taught by her father who was a great performing ballet dancer in Puerto Rico. When he winds up in a wheelchair (for reasons they didn't bother to explain), he becomes very despondent and kills himself.

Grief-stricken over the loss of the father she was extremely close to, and angry with her mother who reacts by going on a bender and sleeping with Amaryllis' boyfriend, Amaryllis borrows money from a friend and goes to New York to pursue a dancing career. Naturally, she falls on very hard times and winds up as a stripper.

Yeah, we've seen it all before, more than once, and done much better. I did enjoy the dancing, however, which was very good, and as I said, Roselyn was very hot in this movie.


Roselyn Sanchez






The Comedy Wire

Comments in yellow

Authorities in Bournemouth, England, seized a shipment of fifty pairs of gasoline-powered inline skates from China. The skates have motors to drive the back wheels and a hand-powered throttle, and they can propel the user at up to 20 mph. Officials said they were not only likely to cause crashes, but the plastic gas tanks were likely to explode, along with the skater. And crashes are even more likely since they have no brakes.

* Two pairs were also found in California...Britney Spears ordered them for her kids.


Sioux Falls, South Dakota, police arrested Verle Peter Dills, 60, after a man reportedly chased Dills out of his yard twice. Dills was carrying a video camera and tripod. In his garage, police allegedly found a "large number" of videotapes of Dills engaging in masturbation and sex acts with nearby traffic signs.

* Doesn't he know that "STOP" means "STOP"?!