The Specialist (1994) is listed at IMDb as a Peruvian film. It is distributed by Warner Brothers, but evidently much of the funding was Peruvian. It was made for $45M, and grossed $170M worldwide. It won numerous Razzies and Razzie nominations, including worst screen couple, worst actor, worst actress, worst supporting actor and worst picture. Sylvester Stallone is an ex CIA explosive specialist, who turned his boss James Woods in for questionable conduct, and both left the agency. Woods went to work for a Miami Mafia head, and Stallone started work as a mercenary. Sharon Stone contacts Stallone to take out the people responsible for murdering her parents years before. He eventually takes the job, which brings him into direct conflict with Woods.
There are a few twists and double crosses before the happy ending, a few fist fights, and some great explosions. Stone shows full frontal in a steamy shower sex scene with Stallone, but you have to watch the full screen version to see everything. Both Widescreen and Fullscreen versions are on the otherwise featureless DVD. IMDb readers have this at 4.7 of 10. Ebert awards 2 stars, and hated it, and Berardinelli awards 1 1/2, and only on the merit of Stone breasts and Stallone's biceps. I hate to admit that I was entertained by this mindless bit of fluff and excitement. Then again, I didn't have high expectations, so the rather weak acting didn't really bother me, and the pace was good enough to hold my interest. This is a C-. If you are int he right mood, you might not find it an unpleasant way to spend a couple of hours.
|Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
Silver Dollar Sam's Nuggets - Murphy Reels in a Fish
Battle of the Network Anchors - Ted Koppel and Jon Stewart face
off on the convention floor.
The trailer for the Ruropean thriller-horror film, High Tension
: "The film centers on two teen girls who settle in for
a relaxing weekend at a country farmhouse, unaware that a violent
intruder is speeding toward them to transform their dreams into a
relentless, bloody nightmare."
Complete professional Natal Report for George W. Bush
"you may do things that others judge to be childish or
Crisco-Americans protest diet industry: "overweight
activists are mounting a feisty protest movement against what it
calls the medical establishment's campaign against obesity"
Boners: Best volleyball ever
Anna Nicole Smith has wardrobe malfunction, ala Janet Jackson
- Tom Cruise says:
"I'm the guy who loves relationships. I love women." I
love women even more than Mike Piazza. I mean I love women even
more than Mike Piazza loves women. You know what I mean. I'm all
Oscar-winner Halle Berry has reportedly backed out of two new
X-Men movie sequels
- Straight Dope:
What the hell was that final episode of "The Prisoner" all about?
Bobblehead Detente : "Arnold Schwarzenegger's
ill-conceived legal fight to curb the sale of a bobblehead doll
featuring a likeness of the California governor came to an end
today. The Republican politician has agreed to allow an Ohio
manufacturer to continue producing the dolls, though future Arnold
bobbleheads will not be carrying an assault rifle "
The success of 'Fahrenheit 9/11' has inspired movie theaters to
book more political documentaries in the hopes of luring
the cast for MGM and Dimension's remake of THE AMITYVILLE HORROR
Reeves, Hounsou & Lawrence on Constantine (movie
adaptation of Hellblazer comic)
Long-awaited Doom 3 leaked online
G.O.P. QUESTIONS KERRY'S HAMSTER HEROISMA mass email
from the Republican National Committee is questioning whether or
not Democratic nominee John Kerry actually saved his daughter
Alexandra's pet hamster, Licorice, from drowning during a family
boating trip as Ms. Kerry has claimed.
The Mousketeer's career reviewed by YAAFM
- Something useful for a change.
ConsumerAffairs.Com Rogues Gallery tells you which
companies suck at customer service. There are some big names on
there, like Best Buy, Circuit City, Hewlett Packard, Blockbuster,
Disney Cruises, Holiday Inn, and Home Depot
Mike Lupica's Shooting From the Lip: Yankees finally see light on
Pornographers Firing Back At Military's Free Boob Jobs.
They are paying women NOT to have breast enhancement surgery.
- Crappuccino? It turns out thatthe
world's best coffee comes from cat shit!
- You can't be too cautious. Use the UK's
blind-dating safety system. Or ... you could go out
with people you know, or with blind dates who are well known to
your friends or family .... naaahhhhhh!
- Average Joes and Janes will be able to digitally mingle among
celebs such as Tom Arnold and the former Mrs Rodman when
'Playboy: The Mansion' hits video game stores this winter.
Whoa! Mingle with Tom Arnold? Throw in Carrot Top and David
Schwimmer, and I'm there, dude.
Jennifer Garner loved shooting the lesbian love scenes in her new
movie Elektra. Garner says that her lesbian scenes were
"some of my best kissing work." The line for Elektra has started
to form at the local Cineplex.
Eating every other day may increase your life span, or
The famous urban felching legend, performed by sock puppets.
The six steps of courtship for male fruit flies. The
things that we can learn from bugs are just amazing.
Favorite Steven Wright Jokes and Clips. It doesn't
actually have clips, only links to clips, but hey, you can't have
everything. Where would you put it?
Sand Sculpture Photos on the Web. Like LEGOS, except
A video for National Orgasm Week in the UK.
Houston Police mistake landscaper's hibiscus for pot.
"He hadn't even gotten his hand on the doorknob when it flew open
and he was looking at the barrel of a pistol. Behind the gun were
about 10 members of the Harris County Organized Crime and
Narcotics Task Force, who burst into the home, guns drawn, and
began shouting at him to get down on the floor. It took a while to
figure out that what had caused the swarm of lawmen to descend
upon him was the hibiscus in his front yard."
VIDEO EXCLUSIVE: Neve's MPAA-Banned Trailer for "When Will I Be
Loved" You'll see brief flashes of nudity in this
trailer for James Toback's latest flick.
Sleazy Rider - Biker gal romped through Pennsylvania town in
birthday suit The usual good news and bad news. Bad
new: arrested. Good news: two words - movie rights. I vote for
Christina Ricci as the naked biker.
Al Franken Radio Show to Be on Cable TV
Sex offenders who target youth using the Internet do not generally
deceive their victims about their age or intentions, and few use
force or coercion
Britain's Library of Unwritten Books, including
"One-Eyed Olaf, The Man Who Was Addicted to Seeing, Poke the Pig
and my own personal favorite, Scrumping in Persia."
'Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?'
A German court has ruled that Germans are allowed to stick their
tongues out in their passport photos. I guess with all
that Nuremberg nastiness aside, their courts now have time for
some less weighty matters. In other news, Gene Simmons has applied
for German citizenship.
NBC Hopes Bill Clinton Will Host 'SNL'. Tina Fey better
stock up on Chap Stick ... jokes.
Victoria Gotti (daughter of John Gotti) and her sons are the
subject of a new reality show, 'Growing up Gotti'
American actor Brad Pitt will become the first topless exhibit at
the Amsterdam Madame Tussaud museum
Golfers face new hazard - bullets. Reminds me of a true
story. About ten years ago I'm working in Zimbabwe, doing a
project for Mobil, and I'm trying to figure out how to pass the
weekend. The travel agent in Harare asks me "golf, or Victoria
Falls?" I respond, "Can't I do both? I thought there was a course
near there." She says, "Yeah, nice course, very near, but closed
because of the drought." I fall for the bait, "So, they can't keep
the course watered? But isn't it on a river?". She responds, "No,
you don't understand. Irrigation is no problem. The problem is
that when we have a drought, the lions expand their feeding
territory - to include the golf course." Now THAT's a hazard.
Hey, Vito. When I told you to steal 41,000 clams, this isn't what
I meant. And when I told you I needed some dough ...
well, just stay away from that bakery, OK?
The Daily Show looks at John Edwards's speech.
Restaurant bans those under 25 " any establishment with
a liquor license can set any age restriction it wants, as long as
the exclusion is applied evenly and consistently."
Keira Knightley to star in biopic of Lawrence Harvey's daughter.
: "Domino Harvey ditched a career as a Ford model to
become a bounty hunter." Why, this is incredible! Lawrence Harvey
would have had to sleep with a woman to have a daughter in those
days, wouldn't he?
- That master of subtlety,
The Filthy Critic, reviews Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle.
The Gena Lee Nolin sex tape
Bill Maher would choose to be handcuffed for 24 hours to New
York's junior senator over Condoleezza Rice, Laura Bush or Greta
Van Susteren/ His basic reasoning: Hillary is "mellow"
(and therefore probably wouldn't mind Maher jerking off while
their hands were attached.)
A tipsy Tara Reid flashes New Yorkers from her Range Rover
(Sorry, no pictures!)
John Kerry has dated Morgan Fairchild and Catherine Oxenberg.
Yeah, Morgan Fairchild, that's the ticket.
- No surprise here:
98 percent of all emergency calls in Norway are a waste of police
Silver Dollar Sam's Nuggets, August 2, 2004 - Texas
Hold 'Em, as written by a poker pro.
The Sawdust Joint, Chapter 1. Silver Dollar Sam talks
about Vegas in the Good Ol' Days. Interesting yarn.
Holy Hannah! Give me back that tinfoil hat. The New Republic was
right! The news of Ahmed Khalfan Ghailani's capyure
came just hours before US presidential candidate John Kerry
delivered his acceptance speech at the Democratic National
Convention in Boston. They had captured him four days earlier. The
timing of the disclosure has rekindled controversy surrounding an
earlier New Republic article specifically alleging US pressure on
Pakistan to produce a "high value target" in July during the
convention. One source in that article said that a White House
aide suggested to Pakistanís intelligence chief that the first
three days of the Democratic convention would be the "best"
timing. Both US and Pakistani officials have denied the story -
and continue to do so!
The New Republic's original article about the "July Surprise"?
Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the ones above,
since it's sorta in real time.
to submit a URL for Other Crap
are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the
review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that
there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written
by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too
ashamed to admit it.
Words from Scoop.
.avi's from Shiloh.
.wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.
NOTE: because of a unique combination of
circumstances with the Windows media player and some substantial
bandwidth theft, we will have to do all of our movie files in zip
format. Left click on the files as you normally would to view a
you get a choice, click on "save", and put it on your hard drive in
the directory of your choice. UnZIP and play from there.
I know this is not especially convenient, but it
allows the film clips to continue. I can protect .zip files from
hot-linking in the same way I can protect still images. For some
reason, if I protect .avis and .wmvs from hot-linking, they will not
play in the Windows media player, and I can't get a satisfactory
work-around. Perhaps I will find a better solution, but for now this
new policy allows you to continue getting the movie clips you want
to see, which is much preferable to my abandoning the clips
Janet Leigh takes a
shower in "Psycho". Is
this the most widely imitated scene in movie history? If you count
all the elements that have been copied - the shower curtain, the
music - maybe so. ( .avi- zip) (.wmv - zip)
Janet Leigh in
"Psycho", Part 2 ( .avi- zip) (.wmv - zip)
Jennifer Tilly and Gena Gershon get it on in "Bound".
Not as good as Joan Chen and Anne Heche, but still pretty easy
watchin'. (.avi- zip) (.wmv - zip)
A few more .wmv conversions from
Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble
with the codecs for these movies:
FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use
DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use
virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the
vids says the video codec: DivX Decoder Filter & audio
codec: Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with.
When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG
Layer-3. A friend of mine told me about compressing the
audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been
capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this
info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp &
asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using
camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could
never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost
too much to buy in my opinion.
A reader says:
You mentioned that some users were
having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool
designed to determine what codec is needed for a video.
http://www.headbands.com/gspot/ Hope this is useful to you
or your users.
I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9.
The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in
the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly
larger, and slightly lower quality.
NOTE: We currently have to do all of our movie files in zip format. Instead of viewing them online, save the zip files to your hard drive in the directory of your choice, un-zip and play from there.
Today from the Ghost...Italian actress/writer/director/producer Asia Argento showing off her great bod in several scenes from "New Rose Hotel" (1998).
Links 1-3 feature Asia swimming toplesss.
In link #4 we see Asia and a couple of other people have some pseudo sex (a single exposed breast in this one)
Link #5...black undies.
Link #6...beautiful wonderbra cleavage.
Link #7...topless in an after sex scene.
Link #8...semi-nude side view with a little breast exposure toward the end.
In yesterday's Fun House I noticed that you wrote that Amy Yip's nipples where 'probably from a body double', but "Sex and Zen" is the only film to date in which Amy Yip exposes her nipples, something she reportedly did under triad coercion.
Yep, I've heard that what we see are in fact Yip's nips. However, I'm far from an expert on Hong Kong sortcore, and I've never seen any official source that documents whether or not it's her. I've visited several fan sites online, and some say the nipples are her, others say body double. I suppose the Yip's Nips question is just one of those mysteries in life without an answer. Much like "did Oswald act alone" or "how many licks does it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll pop". The world may never know.
Now moving on to today's goodies....
Rose McGowan and Amy Locane both topless in scenes from "Going All The Way" (1997).
- Rose McGowan...the girl really needs some sun, but still, what an amazing chest.
- Amy Locane
||Here's an awesome production still of Jolie (with lips in full pout-mode) from the upcoming Oliver Stone movie "Alexander".
||The UK model and actress looking fantastic in a bikini and showing a nipple in 'scenes from the small budget film "Three" (2004) starring Billy Zane.
|Unfortunately there is no nudity here, but this girl really knows how to wear a tank top! Excellent 'caps by Watty featuring scenes from the recent remake of "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre".
|Señor Skin takes a look at the long time B-movie favorite's first post-implant-removal toplessness. Breasts, bum and even brief pube views (link #11) in scenes from "King of the Ants".
Subject: Jessica Alba/Entourage
I haven't seen this scene capped so far, but on one episode of the new HBO series Entourage (a pretty good show IMHO), the boys go to a party hosted by Jessica Alba. When she greets them, she is showing very clear pokies. Does anyone have any 'caps of that scene?
|Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
Pat's comments in yellow...
CAT POOP COFFEE DOES TASTE BETTER
I Prefer Pony Piss Beer - Many people scoffed when they learned the world's
most expensive coffee, Kopi Luwak of Ethiopia, which fetches $35 a cup from
coffee fanatics, is made from beans swallowed and excreted by wild civet
cats. But Prof. Massimo Marcone of Canada's University of Guelph says he's
proved it tastes better. He did field research and tests with taste
machines and humans and found that the cats' digestion breaks down proteins
that make coffee taste bitter. So he says a "crappuccino" does taste
better than a cappuccino.
Still, the crappuccino isn't selling as well at Starbucks.
A crappuccino is the perfect post-show drink after you've watched
You can make it yourself at home by putting Folger's coffee beans in
your cat's Meow Mix.
Even the Ethiopians were surprised...This really just started as a
practical joke on rich American snobs.
MONA LISA IDENTIFIED
He Found The Receipt! - After centuries of debate, new research may have
finally identified the enigmatic model for the Mona Lisa. Italian teacher
Giuseppi Pallanti has found evidence to support the claim that she was Lisa
Gherardini, the wife of a wealthy silk merchant who had five children.
But this only deepens the mystery of why she was smiling.
Five children and TERRIBLE teeth.
Before she had the five kids, she used to pose for Vogue.
PRIEST AND NUN ARRESTED FOR SEX
Collared! - A 43-year-old Catholic priest and a 26-year-old nun were
arrested for public indecency at Lilongwe airport in Malawi after they were
caught having sex in a car. The windows were tinted, but passersby were
startled by the car's rocking. In a courtroom full of giggling spectators,
the priest said that as a man of God, he accepted that Satan had tempted
him. The judge gave them six months in prison at hard labor -- then
suspended it because they both expressed remorse. But he said they'd go to
jail if they did it again within 18 months.
But they've never gone that long without sex before!
They asked, if they did go to jail, could they have conjugal visits?
The Vatican isn't punishing him...They're just relieved it wasn't an
CHINESE PIRATES REWRITE CLINTON'S BOOK
Yo-Ho-Hos! - Chinese book pirates have already rushed out fake versions of
Bill Clinton's "My Life," and Clinton wouldn't even recognize it. In one
version, large portions appear to be written by Hillary. In another,
Clinton quotes Mao. He also says when he met Hillary in college, "She was
as beautiful as a princess. I told her my name is 'Big Watermelon.'"
About Monica Lewinsky, the Chinese version declares, "She was very fat. I
can never trust my own judgment."
She was fat, but her nickname was "Big Watermelons," so...
Sounds like the pirates got hold of the first draft.
They took the Mao quotes out of Hillary's book.
His nickname was Big Watermelon because he left his seed all over the