Yellow has a plot and some quirky characterization, but let's be honest, they are just window dressing. The only reason it exists is to showcase the talent and beauty of its producer/star Roselyn Sanchez. In that respect, it succeeds. Sanchez is gorgeous. She has a beautiful Mediterranean-type face (She's actually Puerto Rican), and a spectacular body with tightly muscled legs, six pack abs, and killer naughty bits. She seems to have the talent as well, but I'm not really qualified to evaluate her dancing. Like most of you, I have several left feet, none of them coordinated, and I can't tell the difference between dancers who are pretty good and those who are brilliant. I can tell you that I enjoyed watching her move, and that she did so gracefully through several different styles of dance ranging from ballet to Broadway to strip clubs.

As for the movie, the less said about that, the better. The main character is named Amaryllis, but they call her Yellow because ... it's a bad Spanish pun (the Spanish word for "yellow" is "amarillo"), and there's just nothing that people enjoy more than corny puns in foreign languages. I don't know about you, but I just can't get enough lame English puns, so I seek them out in all the world's languages.

Yellow leaves her frustrating life in Puerto Rico to pursue her dream of being a professional dancer in The Big Apple. She gradually lowers her sights from dancing in Broadway theaters to waitressing in 10th Avenue hash joints until she finally does land a dancing gig - as a stripper. The film then wanders directly into Almodovar territory with the overriding concept being the dignity and goodness of man, even in the unlikeliest of places. Although Yellow is surrounded by sleazy strip club owners, horny patrons, strippers, transvestites, and crazies, they all turn out to be wise and compassionate. The strip club owner treats her like a daughter. The sleazy #1 patron of the strip club turns out to be a sensitive uptown doctor recovering from a bad break-up. The crazy guy reconciles with his long-lost son. The other strippers give Yellow a standing ovation when she shows off some classical moves. And there's more where all that came from, but I'm sure you must already have the idea.

Despite starting in New York with no money, no friends, and no place to live, she soon finds friendship and true love and also gets her big break on Broadway. The worst thing that happens to her is that she finally has to choose between her doctor and her career!

That poor kid.

3.4 at IMDb. Yes, it is that weak. My mind kept wandering throughout the film. In fact it may be overrated. The 3.4 is padded by a bunch of obviously insincere 10s. The most common score is 2/10, and it merits only a bottom-feeding 2.0 from the top 1000 voters.

On our scale, a D. (It's sexy, but there's not enough nudity to qualify the film as a C- for its erotica.)

Roselyn, however, is a total babe. Film clip here. See the captures down in Vejiita's section.


* Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).

* White asterisk: expanded format.

* Blue asterisk: not mine.

No asterisk: it probably sucks.


Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.








Blood on Satan's Claw


This film is often called one of the better Hammer horror offerings. I have a minor quibble with that -  it is not a Hammer film! It was produced by a Hammer wannabe called Tigon films, and was directed by Piers Haggard, the founder of the British Director's Guild and the grandson of the legendary H. Rider Haggard ("She"). Piers is still active as a director to this day.

Blood on Satan's Claw was released for a week in the UK as Devil's Touch, and then withdrawn and released under its current name. It was circulated on the drive-in circuit in the USA as Satan's Skin.  Set in the 17th century English countryside, it concerns a village which reverts to a belief in witchcraft when a demon possesses several local children, making them his slave.

It all starts when a young man is plowing, and unearths a partial and decomposing demon. He runs to tell a judge who is staying at his master's house, but by the time they return, it is gone. We soon see why. Luscious 18 year old Angel (Linda Hayden) has taken it and assumed the role of Satan's High Priestess. The plan is simple. The demon needs body parts, so Angel's group are drafted as hosts to grow what he needs.

This is a very good horror film in the Hammer tradition. The English countryside has never looked lovelier, the period details are spot on, and the plot is unique. It is especially chilling to have children as the villains.  Highlights include Linda Hayden stripping in an attempt to seduce the parson, the rape of Wendy Padbury before they kill her to harvest the "Satan's Skin" she was growing, some surgery to remove Satan's Skin from a fully awake girl, and a large-breasted Diane Andrews dancing topless in front of a fire with a knife.

This is a C+ as vintage horror. IMDb readers score it 6.0, and it has a generally good reputation with reviewers as well.

The version I viewed comes from It originates in Germany and is titled In den Krallen des Hexenjaegers, but is a friendly all-region DVD with audio in either German or English. It also includes an informative commentary by the cast and crew.

Since the only other version available is a Region 2 PAL disc priced no less than $45.99 at Amazon marketplace, the RLDVDs price is very attractive.

Blood on Satan's Claw (1970)



Linda Hayden


Diane Andrews



Wendy Padbury







100 Women

Chene Lawson, looking great in her bra and panties and then pokies.




Erinn Bartlett, with pokies and then some nice right breast exposure.



Jennifer Morison, showing nice legs and then having her body painted.



Dead Calm


Bonus Caps of  Nicole Kidman's tits in "Dead Calm."







Notes and collages

From Russia With Love


Daniela Bianchi












After a tragedy, Amaryllis Campos (Roselyn Sanchez) moves to New York to follow her dream of becoming a dancer, but ends up as a stripper. Of course in the end she achieves her dreams.

The movie is bad, it's what I call a flat movie, doesn't have anything interesting besides watching Roselyn Sanchez dance half naked.

See Scoop's section for the film clip.


Roselyn Sanchez








First a couple of familiar faces appearing in clips from two not-so-familiar films:

(1) Juliette Lewis in The Darwin Awards (sample right)

(2) Gabrielle Anwar in Nine Tenths (sample right)
These may be better copies of the recent candids which show Anna Friel sunbathing topless. If you have never seen them, they are absolutely worth a look.






The Comedy Wire

Comments in yellow

Todd Davis, CEO of Lifelock security, proves that his service prevents identity theft by advertising his own Social Security number on the company's website.  A man in Ft. Worth, Texas, took the info and used it to obtain a $500 Internet loan.  Davis found the man through a private investigator and sent a film crew to tape his confession against police advice.  Now, local D.A.'s have dropped the case, saying the confession was coerced and is useless.  Besides, the man who stole Davis' identity probably wouldn't get much punishment anyway because he's mentally disabled.

*  Not so mentally disabled that he'd put his Social Security number on the Internet, but still...

The first preview of the upcoming movie "Beowulf" is on the Internet, and it may herald a movie revolution called "Digital Enhanced Live Action."  The actors wore suits with computer sensors all over them; and in post-production, they were digitally altered to look better than life.  Angelina Jolie's breasts and lips were both pumped up even
bigger, and actor Ray Winstone was made to look half his age with rippling abs he doesn't really have. Analysts say this could make dieting, working out and plastic surgery obsolete as computers do all the work to make actors look perfect.  

*  Meanwhile, the rest of us will stop dieting, working out and getting plastic surgery because if even Angelina Jolie doesn't look good enough, why should we even try?!

Elton John has a suggestion for saving music: tear down the Internet. Elton says that in the 1970s, there were ten fantastic albums released every week, and now you're lucky to hear ten a year because the Internet lulls people into staying home and making their own recordings on computers instead of going out and mixing with other people, which sparks creativity.  He said he'd like to shut down the Internet for five years and see how much more interesting art and music would become.  

*  Wouldn't he miss the gay porn?