Wednesday

 

 

* Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).

* White asterisk: expanded format.

* Blue asterisk: not mine.

No asterisk: it probably sucks.

OTHER CRAP:

Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Black Magic Rites

(1973)

Black Magic Rites (1973) is an Italian horror offering originally called Riti, magie nere e segrete orge nel trecento ("Rites, Black Magic and Secret Orgies in the 13 century"). It was released in the US as The Reincarnation of Isabel.

In the thirteenth century, Isabella was burned as a witch by the inquisition and her heart ripped out. Her friends at the time swore revenge, and that they would resurrect her. Cut to the present, where Laureen has moved into the same castle with her family. She is to be married. She looks a whole lot like Isabella, which is not surprising as Rita Calderoni plays both roles. Things complicate quickly, as Isabella's followers have all been reincarnated as vampires, and need to sacrifice a steady stream of virgins (blood tainted by semen is no good) to prepare for the grand resurrection of Isabella.

Many say the film is impossible to follow and makes no sense. I didn't find that to be the case, but I would be the first to say that the plot is amazingly lame, and the transparency of the narrative is clouded by editing which is consistently annoying. The film is full of jump cuts, really jarring ones, and other typical early seventies attempts to seem psychedelic. Although the storyline is not totally incoherent, it is simplistic and poorly developed, and the pinnacle of the performing consists of screaming.

I was less than thrilled.

On the other hand, many feel this film deserves cult status, as a "wonderfully extreme and very crazy example of European horrotica/gorotica," so it is at least a C- based on its appeal to genre fanatics.

Rita Calderoni, Christa Barrymore and Stefania Fassio all show breasts. Numerous unknowns show breasts, buns, and in one case, a quick flash of bush.

IMDb readers say 4.4.

I screened a German version which RLDVDS.com believes to be the best release, with lots of subtitle options, and coded for all regions. Click on the image below for information.

Black Magic Rites (1973)

 

 

Rita Calderoni

 

Christa Barrymore

 

Stefania Fassio

 

Unknowns

 

 

 

 

 

 


Today we have some more classic screen nudity.

 

Re-Animator

 

The always willing to get naked Barbara Crampton in that deleted/extended footage from "Re-Animator."

 

 

Stage Beauty

 

Claire Danes with some tiny tots.

 

 

Stakeout

 

And Madeleine Stowe literally brings up the rear with some mighty fine ass.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Notes and collages

Demon Rage

(Part three of three)

Ms. Wood played "Plenty O'Toole" in the Bond film "Diamonds are Forever."

I will apologize in advance before you open the thumbnails; these collages are from the DVD, yet this movie is so incredibly awful no attempt was made to clean up the VHS for DVD sales.

Do NOT rent or buy this film.

 

Lana Wood

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Tripper

The movie starts with an incident during the time Reagan was President. A little boy listens to everything his President says and ends up killing someone because of his literal interpretation. Years later, in the same mountains, hippies gather around for some sex, drugs and music, but there is someone in the woods who doesn't like hippies very much, a righteous man with an ax - none other than the Gipper himself, President Reagan!

I liked the movie, it has some funny moments. For example, you get funny lines from the victims when they plead with the killer, like "but I vote Republican."

This movie was produced, written and directed by David Arquette, who also has a small part in the movie. Arquette created a fun, campy horror film that can generate some sequels. I like the title they use here in Europe, President Evil, much better that The Tripper.

 

Pazdela Huerta

 

 

Nicole Wilder

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


"The Business"

Season one DVD set

Comedy about a Jewish convert who used to make videos like "girls gone wild," but now is trying to make less exploitive movies.

Clarice Byrne: very, very nice topless.
Patricia Stasiak: hefmag cybergirl flashing her boobs.
 Karen Cliche: silhouette nude.
Kathleen Robertson: very sexy.
Claire Brosseau: lesbian kiss in bikini top.
porn reel: matronly mother topless vacuuming in front of son.

 


 

"Forest of the Dead"

(2007)

Grade-Z zombie movie with much gore but almost no skin.

 

Marie-Julie Loranger shows partial boob in shower and then gets her pussy eaten out by a lesbian zombie.

 


 

"Love You to Death"

Episode: The Strip Club Murder

 

In this John Waters anthology there is the obligatory episode about strippers.

 

Lori Alter: mega cleavage.
Sarain Boylan: partial boob in lesbian scene.
Kristina Pesic: underwear as lapdancer.
 
 

Cashback

This 2006 typically understated comedy from the United Kingdom is funny, but much more. It is a very sweet-natured romantic drama with even a hint of Sci-Fi; it's extremely well done and a real pleasure to watch. Oh yeah, and if that doesn't hook you, it's also loaded with full-frontal nudity.

Ben is an art student who falls out with his girlfriend, but then can't forget her. Because of pining over her, he develops insomnia, so to pass away the night hours, he takes a job working the late night shift at a local supermarket

To deal with the boredom of the night shift, and because he is still mostly interested in art, he develops the skill of freezing time, so he can examine the beauty of his surroundings, and the people in it. Ben also becomes aware of Sharon, an equally bored checkout girl who has her own beauty, and may also hold the answer to Ben's insomnia.

Wildly inventive and captivating, and interesting from start to finish, this one is a must-see.

Bianca Drakes Emilia Fox Keeley Hazell
Hayley-Marie Coppin Irene Bagach Janine-May Tinsley
 

Hey, Scoop

I got the sixth season of Tales from the Crypt and noticed you didn't have these people on the site. Here's a bit more to complete your database. :) Hope you like them!

You don't have any pics of Sherri Rose, so here's an addition.

You have a couple of pictures of Ria Coyne, but not from the show.

The other three, you may or may not have, I'm not sure. One of the three ladies, I think, is Kylie Ireland, but I'm not sure which. The other two, I have no idea. Just regular CRE (clothing removal experts), I guess.

#1

 

#2

#3

 

 

A film clip of Andrea Ferreol, Mascha Gonska, and Romy Schneider in Trio Infernal, sample to the right
A film clip of Monica Bellucci in Mauvais Genre. The samples to the right are old pictures from the archives.
A film clip of Saralise Volm and Annike Schwabe in Finale, sample to the right
A film clip of Heike Makatsch in Die Affare Semmeling, Part 4, sample to the right
A film clip of Jasmin Tabatabai in Die Putzfraueninsel, sample to the right
A film clip of Jessica Schwarz in Die Freunde der Freunde, sample to the right.
Madonna, tasteful in public as always. Y'know, with all the money she has made, you'd think she could afford a dentist. Maybe she shouldn't have moved to England.

 

 

 

 

 


The Comedy Wire

Comments in yellow

Monday, after months of backstage drama, Australian media mogul Rupert Murdoch sealed a $5 billion deal to buy Dow Jones & Co. and control of America's leading business newspaper, the Wall Street Journal.  But some members of the Bancroft family, who have controlled Dow Jones since 1902, are worried that Murdoch will try to boost the troubled Journal with the kind of sensationalism that is the hallmark of his other properties, such as the New York Post, his British tabloids and the Fox Network.

*  For instance, US Treasurer Anna Escobedo Cabral will be appearing topless on Page Three.



Kids have been known to sniff glue and spray paint to get high, but now, there's a dangerous new fad.  Doctors at Memorial Hospital of Carbondale, Illinois, say that some young people are breaking into air conditioners to huff the freon gas.  They warn that this can cause longterm damage or even kill you the first time you do it.  They said that signs of huffing freon include changes in behavior such as lying or running away, slurred speech and whiteness or frostbite around the nose.

*  Kids, you may think that sniffing freon makes you cool, but it DOESN'T make you cool! Well, okay, maybe it does.



Former "View" cast member Star Jones finally admitted to Glamour magazine that she didn't lose 160 pounds through diet and exercise, as she'd claimed, but through gastric bypass surgery.  She previously would only admit to having undergone a "medical intervention."  She claimed she took so long to admit it because, "first, I didn't know if the surgery would work," plus she'd spent her life telling people she was fine with the way she looked and "I was scared of what people might think of me."

*  I thought when she said she'd lost weight through "medical intervention," she meant she'd given birth to a baby hippo. 



Britney Spears and Kevin Federline's divorce became final Monday, but the details are not being made public.  TMZ.com quoted an attorney as saying that it mostly follows the pre-nup with child custody split 50/50.  Also, K-Fed is getting $15,000 a month in child support, plus $20,000 a month in spousal support, but that runs out
in November.

*  That gives him just three months to impregnate and marry Lindsay Lohan. .