Thanks to everyone who reminded me that Dirty Dancing features Jennifer Grey, not Jennifer Beals. Beals, of course, became famous in that other Jennifer-related dancing movie, Flashdance.



Here's a zipped .avi of Annabeth Gish in episode three of Brotherhood. That's three episodes, three nude scenes! Sample capture below.

Additional stills from the bathtub scene:


Here is a zip file with five avis of Maggie Gyllenhaal in Secretary. A pretty good movie with some very good nudity in the last act.  (Movie House Review)


The more obscure items on our docket include Patty Duke's one and only topless scene in 1982's By Design. (Zipped .avi from a VHS tape.) Sample collages below:

Also fished from the Well of Obscurity, Sondra Locke in 1974's The Second Coming of Suzanne, (Zipped .avi from a VHS tape.) Sample collages below:



ASK THE DUST (2006):

John Fante's 1939 novel "Ask the Dust" is revered by those who love gritty stories about the less glamorous aspects of California's place in 20th century history. Set in Depression-era Los Angeles, it chronicles the relationship between a scholarly young Italian-American from Colorado who moves to L.A. to write the Great American Novel and win himself a golden-haired starlet, and a beautiful and complicated Mexican immigrant who hopes to land herself a rich American husband. Since she's not the all-American girl of his dreams, and he's not the Daddy Warbucks of her own dreams, it takes a long time for them to come together, despite a certain obvious attraction. The consummation of their relationship is further delayed by the fact that he's totally inexperienced with women, and terrified to admit it.

Fante's gritty, sometimes poetic novella has long been considered too literary to make a good movie, but if anyone was capable of transforming his vision into cinema it should have been Robert Towne, who wrote Chinatown. Towne wrote and directed Ask the Dust, and he started off with some perfect hiring decisions. He enlisted Caleb Deschanel, one of the greatest cinematographers on the planet, to man his cameras, and he brought in Dennis Grassner to do the kind of production design he has always done for the Coen brothers. Those moves paid off in spades. The working class portions of L.A. look sleazy, brown, and hazy. The attention to period detail creates memorable scenes for Deschanel to film, and he does his usual brilliant job filming them.

Great screenwriter, great cinematographer, great production design ... so, it's a great movie, right?

Not if you ask the critics, the majority of whom panned it. Not if you ask IMDb voters, who score it a tepid 5.7. Not if you ask ticket buyers, who bought fewer than a million dollars worth. The film didn't connect with people.

So what went wrong?

Well, first of all, the part of Arturo Banzini, the author's surrogate and narrator of the story, the nerdy, book-smart dreamer was played by Colin Farrell.

... because when you think of virginal, bookish, inhibited Italian-Americans, you automatically think of Colin Farrell.

Then there is the pacing. Farrell and his co-star, the gorgeous Salma Hayek, dance around one another for the first 2/3 of the movie, seeming to be mean to one another just for the joy of meanness, even though we can see that they will eventually have to come together. It just rambles and rambles, and spends a lot of time with eccentric secondary characters. Then, when the film finally goes somewhere, it goes straight into dyin' woman melodrama. That's right, Salma character bickers with Farrell for two thirds of the film, then spend the last third dying of Ali McGraw Disease. Looked at from Farrell's point of view, he spends the first two thirds convinced he's not in love and pushing her away (although we can see that he's actually just in sexual terror of an aggressive and experienced woman), then he admits his love, and she immediately starts coughing. There's not a lot there for an audience to hang on to. Zero catharsis.

Furthermore, I wasn't convinced of the film's realism in the aggressive anti-courtship stage. Farrell and Hayek seemed to be movie characters mouthing movie dialogue rather than human beings acting with genuine motivations. The two of them kept asking each other why they were being so ornery to one another, but I never did hear a convincing explanation, and I found their fake contempt for one another to be both irritating and lacking in credibility. Salma's character was particularly incongrous. I kept wondering how she could afford a car during the Depression when she could not even afford a decent pair of shoes, and I kept wondering how she could work a hard job on her feet all day in the heat of summer, while also dying of consumption, and still look perfectly manicured in every way at the end of her double shift. Salma is one of the most beautiful women in the world, and she looks better now than she ever has, but maybe she was just too glamorous and well-spoken for this role. In the final scenes, when the lead characters finally seem to be acting believably, and Salma was starting to look genuinely sick, the film finally seems to draw the audience in, but by that time my apathy had already caused me to pause the film twice. I don't think that's the sign of a really involving movie.

And yet ...

When the film was over, many scenes haunted me and I wanted to see them again. And I'm not just talking about Salma's nude scenes (which are very nice indeed). I watched nearly the entire film a second time and, relieved of the responsibility to follow the story, paused to admire many details of the film's execution, as well as the ambitious way in which it addressed racism and the nature of being a true American. For a film with such a lukewarm reputation, and one that felt overlong and rambling when I watched its full 116 minutes, it left some lasting impressions, and in the final analysis I'm glad to have seen it.

Besides, how much can one complain about a movie which offers Salma Hayek naked?

Salma Hayek
Idina Menzel




Will Ferrell reunites Lance and Neil Armstrong

Nostalgia ... Schoolhouse Rock: I'm just a bill

Unemployment rate among hot young women holding at zero

"Police in Germany are hunting pranksters who have been sticking miniature flag portraits of George W. Bush into piles of dog poo in public parks."
  • "Legal experts say there is no law against using feces as a flag stand and the federal constitution is vague on the issue."
  • ... which is kind of surprising. You'd think the German constitution would have several highly specific provisions stipulating which types of animal shit can be used to support flags.

"Toast the one you love! Don't say it with flowers - say it with toast!"

Lots of comic-con material has been posted online at YouTube.

15 Book-to-film adaptations that live up to the source material

The Trailer for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles


Now that's a quality start! The Rockies' Jeff Francis pitched at two hitter against the Cardinals at Coors.
  • He was perfect through five, and finished the game allowing no walks, a bloop single, and a double to Pujols.

"Vegas makes it illegal to feed the homeless in parks" It is still OK to feed the squirrels.

"A banner advertisement posted on the MySpace Web site may have infected more than one million users with adware, according to security firm iDefense."

The trailer for Turistas (in the New Stuff section)
  • "After a terrifying bus accident maroons a diverse group of young adventure travelers in a remote Brazilian beach town, they slowly discover that the white sand beaches and lush jungles are concealing a darker, unsettling secret."

Six clips from Little Miss Sunshine
  • "Little Miss Sunshine tells the story of the Hoovers, one of the most endearingly fractured families ever seen on motion picture screens. Together, the motley six-member family treks from Albuquerque to the Little Miss Sunshine pageant in Redondo Beach, California, to fulfill the deepest wish of 7-year-old Olive, an ordinary little girl with big dreams. Along the way the family must deal with crushed dreams, heartbreak, and a broken-down VW bus, leading up to the surreal Little Miss Sunshine competition itself. On their travels through this bizarrely funny landscape, the Hoovers learn to trust and support each other along the path of life, no matter what the challenge."

Four clips from Scoop, Woody Allen's new movie.

An extended clip from Step Up
  • "Everyone deserves a chance to follow their dreams, but some people only get one shot. Tyler Gage (Channing Tatum) is a rebel from the wrong side of Baltimore's tracks – and the only thing that stands between him and an unfulfilled life are his dreams of one day making it out of there. Nora (Jenna Dewan) is a privileged ballet dancer attending Baltimore's ultra-elite Maryland School of the Arts -- and the only thing standing in the way of her obviously brilliant future is finding a great dance partner for her senior showcase. When trouble with the law lands Tyler with a community service gig at Maryland School of the Arts, he arrives as an angry outsider, until his skills as a gifted street dancer draw Nora's attention. Now, as sparks fly between them, both on and off stage, Tyler realizes he has just one performance to prove that he can step up to a life far larger than he ever imagined. Featuring the directorial debut of leading choreographer Anne Fletcher, the film also stars R&B superstar Mario, Drew Sidora as well as rap legend Heavy D, Damaine Radcliff, De'Shawn Washington and Academy Award® nominee and Golden Globe® winner Rachel Griffiths."

  • "Smith had not seen the fully-edited version of Clerks II until last week's screening in New York City. "I feel bad now about what I said about Siegel," said Smith. "Apparently, he was right on the money when he said this movie was foul and mean and repulsive."



George Michael Tapped This???!!!

Paris does a raunchy photo shoot to promote her new album

URK says it all: SaveTheTatas.com.

"Asked about a deer's final thoughts, Ted Nugent dissed the French."

"Did Jodie Foster date Kim Basinger?" Very doubtful.

Google Earth images of all 30 MLB ballparks.
  • Assuming North to be 0 degrees, East 90, and South 180, Minute Maid Ballpark in Houston is the only ballpark where the batter faces anywhere between 181 and 359 degrees, and that barely within the range at about 345 - close to due North. The Houston park has a retractable roof, so the slight Western exposure does not affect batters in the early evening. The management doesn't draw the roof back until after dark.
  • Several parks are very close to due north, but no others vary on the westerly side. Chase Field (DBacks) seems to face due North. Comerica (Tigers) is the closest to due South - maybe 150 degrees. San Francisco's AT&T park seems to face almost due East.

Cannibal the Musical - Hang the Bastard


The opening number from Cannibal: The Musical (from Parker/Stone)

"A star on the brink of exploding as a spectacular 1a supernova has been glimpsed by international astronomers."


Movie Reviews:

Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format. Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.


Sunday (1997)

Sunday is a character piece about a fading actress named Marilyn (Lisa Harrow) and a homeless man named Oliver (David Sachet) who lost his job with IBM, then his family, and is now living in a shelter. Both live in Queens, and meet on the street. Marilyn decides that he is a famous movie director, and picks him up. She ends up taking him home, and screwing him on the stairs after a game where he tells his real story pretending that it is only a fiction, then she tells a comparable story about picking up a homeless man and pretending he is a director. Honestly, by the time the film is over, you can't tell who really thinks what.

After the initial sex, her estranged husband shows up with their adopted daughter, and Oliver leaves. However, he forgot his coat, so returns. She takes him out on the town, and returns to her flat. After a shower together, they end up in a real bed.

Nudity from a 54 year old woman might not entice you, but it is an interesting slice of life, and the film is much better than its $450K budget would predict. It won numerous awards, including the Grand Jury at Sundance. Portions were shot in a real homeless shelter, and one of the cast, who sings opera in subways for a living, played himself. The director volunteered in a shelter for a year before making the film. In a feature length commentary, he shares that it is intended as a comedy ... but don't expect belly laughs. It is, however, an entertaining character piece.

This is a C, as an interesting art house effort.

IMDb readers say 7.0. ,




Lisa Harrow does a lengthy full frontal.









These are most decidedly not mine, but they show an exuberantly endowed gal named Laine Carlin in a 1962 (!!!) movie entitled House On Bare Mountain. The collage is fine but you just gotta see the zipped .avi clip to catch all the bouncy action. Ay, caramba!


Laine Carlin





Daniella Remmers in something called Punk Lawyer

Kelly Dawn Malloy in The Curse of El Charro

Tabitha Stevens in The Curse of El Charro

Victoria Vanegas in The Curse of El Charro




Pat's comments in yellow...

Utah's tourism industry has launched an $11 million ad campaign to try to convince people that Utah isn't dull and unhip.  A survey showed that while tourists love Utah's skiing and scenery, they associate it with a lack of adult fun, restrictive liquor laws and the Mormon Church.  For instance, Salt Lake City has no walkable entertainment district because bars have to be at least 300 feet apart.  There's also a tax on full-strength beer, and you have to fill out a lot of paperwork to become a "club member" before you can order a drink.  The ads will tell tourists there is nightlife in Utah and educate them about where it is and how to access it.

*  Just remember, if you want a drink, be sure to bring a notary public with you ... And note that you have to fill out all the paperwork again for each beer.  

Last Thursday night, during a taping of "The Tonight Show," a woman came out of the audience and confronted guest Colin Farrell.  She unsuccessfully tried to sue him last year for allegedly stalking her, and she self-published a book about her alleged sexual dalliances with him called "Colin Farrell: A Dark, Twisted Puppy."  She left a copy on Jay Leno's desk.  Farrell escorted her to the door where security led her away.  She shouted, "I'll see you in court," and Farrell replied, "You're insane."  He got a restraining order requiring her to stay 150 feet away from him.

*  She is so nuts, Colin is seriously considering not having sex with her again.