Tuna wrote on Wednesday:
"They are still trying to adjust my medication. My heart rate is stable, and
the trick is to reduce medications to get rid of my dizziness and fatigue
without having the heart rate climb. I will be on disability for some or all of
August, and they are contemplating a cardio-covert, and angiogram, a sleep
study, and who knows what else. I asked him outright if this was as good as it
gets. He said it was possible, but he hoped not."
If you'd like to get in touch with him, his email address is email@example.com
|Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
Hustle and Flow (2005)
Opened yesterday. Urban drama about a small-time pimp and hustler who tries to make
it in hip-hop. Stars Terrence Dashon Howard. Critics generally liked it
(Metacritic 68, Rotten Tomatoes 81%), but said that it would not be much without
Howard. IMDb voters don't like it at all (5.2)
Taryn Manning Collage
A Very Long Engagement (2004)
There isn't much more that I can say about this film since after seeing it I
anointed Jean-Pierre Jeunet as the greatest living director. Where does one go
from there. Here's the
Not Another Teen Movie (2001)
Scoopy Junior and I agree that this is an underrated comedy. The critics hated
it, but then again the critics hate almost every lowbrow genre parody. It has
always been so. You should have seen the original reviews for Blazing Saddles,
or for that matter, for Duck Soup.
There is a kind of more-cultured-than-thou mind-set
among critics that begins with this premise: the very best lowbrow genre parody,
no matter how brilliant and funny, is not as good as the very worst serious
drama. Once you accept that truth, little grasshoppers, you will be able to
write good reviews for complete manure like Eyes Wide Shut, while insisting that
Airplane is beneath your dignity,
Nothing more to say about the movie. For reference, here is my
Notes on the Unrated Extended Director's Cut:
There are only two changes from the earlier DVD to this one:
1. They moved the deleted scenes back into the film proper.
2. They deleted the commentary tracks.
Therefore, the only reason to watch the re-issued "director's cut" DVD is if you
want to watch the entire movie straight through rather than seeing the deleted
scenes separately. This is basically a rip-off. If you own the earlier DVD, this
one has not one shred of additional material. In fact, it has less material (no
commentary tracks), so if you don't own either one and want one, get the earlier
Jennifer Leone (Jesse Capelli)
Amber Marie Goetz
Unknowns in the film
Unknowns in the Marilyn Manson rock video
'Caps and comments by Hankster:
Today we take a look at a 1999 flick called the "Killer Eye".
Good movie? no, bad movie?, yes. The star of this one is Jacqueline Lovell. Now for me I think this woman is very attractive and usually gets very naked in her movies. But this time all we get is some topless scenes which is kind of disappointing, what where they thinking, they have an actress who is comfortable with showing everything (remember lolita 2000 from a few days ago) and all I get is boobs.
Well at least we do get Nanette Bianchi in some scenes with the "Killer Eye" (really cheesy monster)and she shows off the whole package.This is only her second screen credit at IMDB.
|Here is "Pitch Black" and "Man of Fire" co-star Radha Mitchell spending a bit of screen time showing us some lovely bikini top cleavage in scenes from the Aussie Flick "Visitors" (2003).
|Here is adult film star Gina Ryder showing off her big'uns in scenes from "Alien Erotica 2"
|More of Gina Ryder...this time she is joined by another busty lady of night, Kim Dawson in scenes from an episode of the made-for-cable series "Bedtime Stories".
|Marvin takes a look at Kristin Scott Thomas' full frontal nude scene in "The English Patient".
In my way of looking at the world, at every point in life we can all identify ourselves as being like a character from Seinfeld. In this case, most people are a Peterman, but I am an Elaine. Sure, the movie took home 9 Oscars in 1997, including: Best Picture and Best Director...but good lord was is it dull!
|DeadRed 'caps featuring Sci-Fi Babe Claudia Black showing off some lovely cleavage on last week's season premiere of "Stargate SG-1".
Black's former "Farscape" co-star Ben Browder joined the "Stargate" cast full-time this year, and so far, Black is set to appear in 6 episodes of SG-1's 9th season.
|New in theaters! Here is up and coming starlet Taryn Manning showing a brief breast view in a scene from "Hustle & Flow".
You may recognizer her from "Crossroads", "8 Mile" and "Cold Mountain".
|The Skin-man serves up some nudity from a couple of little-knowns in this 3-way scene from "The Last Don II".
Tania Lamanna shows off her robo-big'uns while Lynley Swain bares breasts and bum.
Here are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the
review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that
there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written
by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too
ashamed to admit it.
"The special prosecutor may be going after Karl Rove
and Scooter Libby for making false statements to the
prosecutors. In other words: lying."
- Man, if they're going to go after politicians
for lying in public, they better start building a
lot more prisons in the D.C. area. My guess is that
a prosecution for lying ain't gonna happen. I base
this on the theory of legal precedents. Richard
Nixon went his entire life without ever telling the
truth once - not even by accident - and they never
tossed him in the slammer.
More dating tips from Weekly World News:
"HOW TO LAND BABES!"
Now THAT's a mug shot. Looks like Bill Murray on
The trailer for The Chumscrubber, an ensemble
cast dramedy about suburban life. It features some
pretty big names, like Ralph Fiennes and Glenn Close.
This could be one for the Guinness book - I actually
saw Fiennes smile once in the trailer!!!
The trailer for Yours, Mine and Ours
- "In this family comedy, single parents Frank
(Dennis Quaid) and Helen (Rene Russo) plan to tie
the knot... but with 18 children between them
trying to sabotage the marriage, they discover that
weddings and families can't be built in a day."
Netdisaster - Destroy the web!
The first look at the trailer for V For Vendetta
- "Set against the futuristic landscape of
totalitarian Britain, 'V For Vendetta' tells the
story of a mild-mannered young woman named Evey
(Natalie Portman) who is rescued from a
life-and-death situation by a masked vigilante
(Hugo Weaving) known only as 'V.' Incomparably
charismatic and ferociously skilled in the art of
combat and deception, V ignites a revolution when
he detonates two London landmarks and takes over
the government-controlled airwaves, urging his
fellow citizens to rise up against tyranny and
oppression. As Evey uncovers the truth about V's
mysterious background, she also discovers the truth
about herself -- and emerges as his unlikely ally
in the culmination of his plot to bring freedom and
justice back to a society fraught with cruelty and
corruption. Based on the acclaimed graphic novel 'V
For Vendetta' by Alan Moore ('The Watchmen,' 'From
Hell') and illustrator David Lloyd."
Tethys, Rings, and Shadows, as seen from Cassini
Actor Tom Sizemore was ordered Friday to remain in a
live-in drug rehabilitation program until he is
sentenced in September for violating his probation on
My E.U. Vacation: "What I learned reading the
European constitution on a French beach in the
The girls of Comic-Con
Here's the trailer for Waiting, a lowbrow comedy
about a Bennigan's-type restaurant, starring Ryan
Letterman's "Top Ten Signs Lance Armstrong Is Getting
- Goodbye Gatorade, hello Colt 45
- Yesterday rode twenty miles out of his way
looking for hookers
- During stage 18, took in the noon showing of
- Took detour to nail Jude Law's nanny
Conan previews his mismatched buddy cop film which
co-stars former Secretary of Labor Robert Reich
The Daily Show's Ed Helms points out that 'John
Roberts' is the standard fake ID name for white
The Daily Show:
"John Roberts. He's nicer than Scalia."
The Daily Show's Rob Corddry looks at the Supreme
Court confirmation hearings
The Daily Show's Samantha Bee investigates how Arnold
Schwarzenegger's cheers have turned to jeers.
Newsweek's Fareed Zakaria talks with Jon Stewart
about recent events in London.
The Daily Show looks at Saddam's trial and other
Iraqi news. "Saddam's a lawyer, and you've GOT to
feel bad for the first guy who tried to tell him a
Roman Polanski won his libel suit against Vanity Fair
magazine over an article that accused him of
propositioning a woman while on the way to the
funeral of his murdered wife, Sharon Tate.
A man who enjoyed a romance with Jennifer Aniston 21
years ago is auctioning a love letter she wrote to
Two trailers for A Sound of Thunder
- "Based on a short story by master of science
fiction Ray Bradbury, the sci-fi action adventure A
Sound of Thunder is set in the future, when time
travel is not only possible, it's a lucrative
monopoly. It's especially profitable for Charles
Hatton (Ben Kingsley), the owner of Time Safari
Inc., a travel agency that specializes in escorting
wealthy clients on exclusive hunting trips back to
the Prehistoric Age. Under the leadership of
seasoned scout Dr. Travis Ryer (Ed Burns),
participants are permitted to hunt and kill
dinosaurs provided they follow a set of strenuous
rules. These guidelines are intended to protect the
creatures' natural habitats and prevent time
travelers from impacting the course of evolution.
When an expedition is compromised and the rules are
broken, the hunters return to the future...and
discover the world is a markedly different place
than it was when they left. As 'time waves' ripple
from the Prehistoric past through the present to
the uncharted future, Ryer teams up with Sonia Rand
(Catherine McCormack), the inventor of the time
travel technology, to unravel the mystery behind
the catastrophic historical changes that are
threatening to erase humanity from existence."
Here is the promo piece for Rob Cohen's Stealth (from
Here's the trailer for Walk the Line, the Johnny Cash
biopic starring Joaquin Phoenix.
The trailer for Thumbsucker.
- Winner, Special Jury Prize for Acting (Lou
Pucci), Sundance Film Festival 2005. Winner, Silver
Bear for Best Actor (Lou Pucci), Berlin
International Film Festival 2005. It's not easy
growing up, no matter what age you are ... Justin
Cobb (Lou Pucci) still sucks his thumb at 17. He
wants to stop and knows that his thumbsucking is
disrupting his family, his love life and his
identity. The only thing that changes his behavior
is hypnosis therapy administered by his "guru"
orthodontist. But while Justin felt this would
solve all his problems and he would finally be
"normal," his troubles were really just beginning.
Thumbsucking was only a symptom of a deep-seated
fear: that he and his father aren't good enough for
his mother, and that she would leave them.
Thumbsucking was the only way to soothe this fear.
Once that is gone Justin spirals into manic
behavior, is diagnosed with ADHD and put on
Ritalin, which becomes a substitute for his thumb.
When the high of the prescription drugs and a
newfound success at school crash, Justin turns to
pot and sex to replace his thumb. His father Mike
(Vincent D'Onofrio) is himself shadowed by the sad
twists of youth: a broken college football career
apparently sidelined by a knee injury. In many ways
Mike feels like a teenager, yet he finds himself in
his early 40s with his eldest son still sucking his
thumb as he's heading to college and his wife
seeming to drift away. Mike hides his fears and
disappointments with tough behavior - but that
trick is running dry. He is growing out of the lies
and denials that got him from college to the
present. Did he ever really want to be a jock? Is
that a false self that he has hidden in for all
these years and doesn’t know how to evolve out of?
His wife Audrey (Tilda Swinton) wonders how she
could possibly be "grown up" with a son going to
college. She seems to be asking "How did I get
here?" and "Is this all there is?" In her early
40s, she is, like Justin, struggling to find out
who she is and to accept her shortcomings. As a
mother she knows that she doesn't have all the
answers to Justin's troubles, and that she is
sometimes too busy dealing with her own doubts to
help him. Audrey hides from these realities through
an obsession with a TV heartthrob, Matt Schraam
(Benjamin Bratt), whose TV character seems to have
all the neat answers, but his real drug addicted
self reveals messier truths to both her and Justin.
Little brother Joel (Chase Offerle) is mostly
oblivious to the family's dynamics, and thinks his
troubled older brother is embarrassing. Joel
provides comic relief with his lack of doubt in a
family full of questions, yet his strong-mindedness
may be misunderstood. Justin turns to others
outside his family to help. His New Age
orthodontist, Perry Lyman (Keanu Reeves), seems to
mirror Justin's ups and downs. They both try on
different personas that hide their doubts and
fears. Perry transforms into an EST/FORUM-style
high achiever before winding up a washed-up mess
who stops looking for disguises and easy answers,
finding a strange kind of happiness in the process.
At school, Mr. Geary (Vince Vaughn), Justin's
debate coach, initially tries to help. His
alternately dominating and cripplingly insecure
behavior is revealed as he attempts to live his
life through his students. Striving to act as a
peer to Justin, Mr. Geary eventually finds that he
can no longer control him when Justin reaps great
success, and their relationship crumbles. Justin's
heart belongs to another pretender, Rebecca (Kelli
Garner) who masks her insecurities about sex and
relationships behind a cool demeanor. She seems
adult beyond her years, but Justin learns the hard
way that she is not able to face her fears. "Thumbsucker"
is an honest and funny look at the struggles of
people who feel deeply flawed, both those in youth
and middle age. They yearn to be anything but their
real selves with their real fears and doubts.
Instead, they want to be "normal." They look for
magic answers to fix themselves – only to realize
that they can't be someone else, that "normal" does
not exist, and that their flaws are what make them
human and loveable.
The trailer for Junebug
- "When Madeleine (Embeth Davidtz), a
British-born dealer in regional, 'outsider' art,
travels from Chicago to North Carolina to pursue a
local painter for her gallery, she and her
brand-new, younger husband George (Alessandro
Nivola) extend the trip to include an introduction
to his family: his prickly mother Peg (Celia
Weston); his taciturn father Eugene (Scott Wilson);
his angry younger brother Johnny (Benjamin
McKenzie), who has always suffered in the shadow of
his over-achieving brother; and Johnny's very
pregnant and innocently garrulous wife Ashley (Amy
Adams). Madeleine confronts the difficulty of these
two cultures colliding, and discovers the
tumultuous outcome as these separate ways of life
Although Ashley immediately takes to the
sophisticated Madeleine and embraces her as a
sister, the other members of George's family,
especially his mother, are less than receptive.
With George falling into his old routine of
spending time alone, Madeleine relies almost
entirely on Ashley to help her navigate the family
dinners, Church meetings, and Ashley's baby shower,
all while desperately trying to close the deal on
the artist. Tensions mount when Ashley goes into
labor and each family member's priorities,
Madeleine's included, are confronted."
The trailer for Get Rich or Die Tryin', the urban
drama starring 50 Cent
URL says it all:
The top 10 web fads of all time
A bit of sadness in 80s nostalgia - Lord Alfred Hayes
Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the links above, since it's sorta in real time.
here to submit a URL for Other Crap
|Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
Pat's comments in yellow...
FREE BROTHEL COUPON IN MAGAZINE
Tip Your Server - The German leisure lifestyle magazine Freizeit ran an ad
for a legal brothel in Austria which included a coupon for "half an hour of
free sex with a lady of your choice." The ad sparked outrage from women
readers, who called it appalling, indecent and sexist. But the issue sold
out in one day. The magazine's advertising director said the ad was not
salacious and said the women who complained are "nitpicking."
So are the people who went to that brothel.
Know who else is complaining? The prostitutes.
If you're into three-ways, next month they're running a two-for-one
For some guys, a hooker coupon is the only way they can get sex without
having to pay for it.
OCEAN IS BEST STRESS-REDUCER
Do I Have To Cut The Grass? - The European beer company Hoegaarden surveyed
2,000 adults to ask what's the quickest way to reduce stress. 84 percent
said the best way was to look at the ocean. Watching the sea came in far
ahead of runner-up stressbusters, such as walking in the park, smelling
newly-cut grass or listening to the birds singing.
Or, unfortunately, having a beer.
When I watch the ocean, I keep thinking that I spotted a shark.
I think the best stress reducer is the sound of a supermodel's post-sex
snoring as she lies in bed beside me while I count my lottery jackpot
winnings...This is theoretical, by the way.
WARNING: NYMPHOS ARE EVERYWHERE
Threat Or Promise? - Isla Fisher has a breakthrough role in "Wedding
Crashers" as Gloria, a sex-crazed woman who throws herself at Vince Vaughn,
but it's causing some off-screen problems. Fisher, the fiancee of British
comic Ali G, said she's alarmed by the number of nymphomaniacs who are
coming up to her to describe in graphic detail how they relate to Gloria
until she "feels the need to walk away." She said, "Clearly, there are a
lot of Glorias out there, so men, beware."
So I can be on my guard, could she send me their names and phone
Apparently, they aren't big enough nymphomaniacs to come up to Ali G
Ladies, a little tip: If you want to talk about your nymphomania, tell
a man...He won't walk away.
TACKIEST CELEBRITY AUCTION EVER
Least Likely To Succeed - A man who had a teenage summer romance with a
15-year-old Jennifer Aniston in 1984 is selling his "Precious High School
Romance Memorabilia" on eBay. The treasures include the paper she first
wrote her name and number on in lipstick, a love letter, and a birthday
greeting she wrote on toilet paper after realizing she forgot to buy him a
card. He calls it "an intimate and endearing look into a young Jennifer's
heart," and set a reserve price of $100,000.
For $100,000, that phone number had better still be good.
The toilet paper was more than he deserved.
For an extra $20,000, he'll throw in the first restraining order she
ever sent him.
He plans to spend the money on Angelina Jolie memorabilia.
|A quick site note
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If you have your own site or blog, sign up today and earn some extra cash in 2005 by promoting the Fun House!