The Fifth Element
I have often written about directors who have great gaps between their best and worst work - like Franklin Schaffner, who directed both Patton and Yes, Giorgio. If you look at this issue with no other reference but the IMDb scores, director Larry Clark may have set the all-time record in this particular category. In one single calendar year, 2001, he released two movies. Bully is rated a very solid 7.0, but Teenage Caveman is rated 3.3, and is contending for a spot on the IMDb all-time worst list. Now that's a gap! And I think it is probably an accurate representation of the difference between the two films. Teenage Caveman is really that bad. Bully, on the other hand is a helluva powerful movie, and a surprisingly good one.
Although, now that I think about it, mom gave them good advice, and should have done so even if she had known they were going to kill. The American Dental Association probably does advise to brush and floss your teeth after every major crime.
There is a New World Somewhere
Bruckner film clips (collages below)
Two Lovers and a Bear
Maslany film clips (collages below)
Dushku in Banshee (s4e6) in 1080hd - adjusted for
better light and color
Lane in Vital Signs (1990) in 720p
Vital Signs is a soap opera about third year medical students. You know the drill. When off duty, the dedicated doctors have romances with one another. When on duty they scream, "Live, damn you!" as they pound furiously on their patients' chests.
There is one great mystery surrounding this film. Perhaps you think of yourself as a rational and skeptical person who believes that time travel is impossible. Well if that is so, this film will test your confidence in that belief. Somehow, a 1982 genre parody called Young Doctors in Love managed to parody Vital Signs almost scene-for-scene even though Vital Signs was released in 1990.
I can only offer two possible explanations:
1) Vital Signs represents the only case in history where a serious movie was created by stripping the humor from a parody, thus allowing itself to be pre-satirized for your protection. It would be the exact equivalent of taking the script from Blazing Saddles, removing every bit of humor and the silly modern day epilogue, thus creating an inspiring, cliché-ridden Western.
Or, and this seems to me the more likely explanation:
2) The writer and director of Young Doctors in Love journeyed into the future, watched Vital Signs, and wrote a parody of it.
I guess I could stop being a smart-ass and admit that there is undoubtedly a far more rational explanation available. I must be unaware of or have mercifully forgotten at least one and probably several pre-1982 films which are completely indistinguishable from Vital Signs. I will wager that this particular version of the story is distinguished from similar earlier films only by the graphic and sometimes bloody detail in the surgery scenes and other medical emergencies.
That paragraph alone should tell you whether you want to see it.
Anyway, that's all I'm going to write. If you want to see Young Doctors in Love minus the jokes, this is your movie.
If you just want to see Diane Lane's breasts, just watch the clip above.
An Ireland Baldwin wardrobe malfunction
More of Nicole Scherzinger's breast exposure on the