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Tuna
"Mararia" (1998)

Mararia (1998) is an exquisitely filmed tragic love story shot in the Canary Islands and set in the 1940's. Antonio Josť Betancor directed, and adapted the novel by Rafael Arozarena. Mararia (Goya Toledo) is a young woman living with her adopted mother, but longing to escape her small volcanic island and see the world. When a new doctor arrives in town, she considers him, but realizes that he is not likely to leave the island. Then a young British geologist arrives to study the volcanic formations and activity on the island. He is attractive, and a way out, so Mararia starts a relationship with him, and ends up pregnant. This begins a chain of events that the characters think is born of love, but is really a matter of obsession and selfishness.

The color palette and the photography is wonderful, and creates an atmosphere you can almost smell. Goya Toledo lights up the screen, and has a lengthy nude scene near the end where she shows the three B's, which include smallish but perky breasts, and a nice round butt. Some of the minor characters were well-acted as well. As to the story, I would have to say that I enjoyed it less than the other aspects of the film, and prefer love stories where at least somebody happily-ever-afters, but it was not bad enough to ruin the film for me. The DVD is bare-bones, and the film is in Spanish with English subtitles, but they had the good taste to put the subtitles in the black portion of the letterbox. IMDB readers say 7.2/10. Rating is difficult. As a love story, it is a C-, but as an art film, and period piece, it is more like C+, and Goya Toledo is someone I will be watching.

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  • Goya Toledo (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

    "Flesh for Frankenstein" (1974)

    Flesh for Frankenstein (1974), AKA Andy Warhol's Flesh for Frankenstein purports to be a film in the Andy Warhol style. The director claims that he made sex scenes humorous because he doesn't think sex belongs on the screen. Dr. Frankenstein has decided to create a master race. He already has constructed the perfect woman, and needs a few more choice parts for the man. Since his goal is to mate them, he realizes that he needs the head of a womanizer, so visits the local brothel to decapitate a sure thing. Of course, he gets the head of an asexual friend who wants to be a monk. Meanwhile, The Baron's wife/sister hires the randy friend as a house-boy, whose duties are all performed horizontally.

    This film is actually an Italian gore-fest and titty flick. Warhol had nothing to do with it, other than possibly some small payment for the use of his name. The set decoration was amazing, especially the lab, the effects makeup was top-notch, the premise allowed for lots of nudity, but the decision to use broken English by people who don't speak it was not a good one. Still, it is worth a watch as an exploitation film. It has enough nudity and simulated sex that it actually got an X rating. The Criterion DVD I watched was acceptable quality, but not the best transfer I have seen from films that age.

    Monique van Vooren as the Baroness showed all three B's in sex scenes, Dalila Di Lazzaro as the female monster also showed the three B's, and three hookers I could not ID displayed their charms as well. IMDB readers award 5.1/10. That speaks to the quality of the film, but not its entertainment value. You really have to see the "sex scene" between Frankenstein and the female monster where he opens her stitches and massages her gall bladder to get off. Maltin says BOMB, something he seems to award to two kinds of films -- those that are unwatchable, and those that are bad enough to be good. The genre is Italian sleaze, and this is a solid genre picture. C.

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  • Monique Van Vooren (1, 2, 3, 4)
  • Delila Di Lazzaro (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)
  • Hookers (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    I was a busy bee again today! 

    No reviews today, just capsule summaries. Got a plane to catch. My reviews will appear at scoopy.com, possibly by the time you read this, possibly not. See ya in a couple weeks!

     

    Highlander: Endgame is - well, you probably already know whether you want to see this, or not. TV Highlander teams up with Movie Highlander to defeat some powerful lowlanders, and also face off against each other in center rink. TV quality.

     

    The Caveman's Valentine is a film that I completely loved, despite the fact that on the surface it is a detective story which is obvious and boring as a detective story. But what a beautiful performance by the man - I'm talkin' Samuel L Jackson here, who owns every minute he's ever on screen in anything, in this case playing an insane homeless guy trying to solve a crime. He knows he has moments of lucidity and moments of madness, but he feels like he has to solve the damed croime anyway. The movie is also beautifully photographed from both the technical and the artistic standpoint. Too bad they couldn't make the detectin' a little more interesting. Anyway, it was not especially well reviewed (50%), and did nothing at the box, but I liked it and admired the craftsmanship behind it. I think you'll see from my collages that there was some stunning photography, and beautiful use of color.

     

    Speaking Parts is a pretentious, garbled, muddled, generally fucked-up piece of cold, surreal, detached, postmodernist crap from Atom Egoyan. I'd have a better chance trying to figure out an early Luis Bunuel movie than this thing, even after having listened to the commentary. Atom directed my single favorite movie, "The Sweet Hereafter", but this movie only shows you how much he matured in the nine years between the two films. 

    • Gabrielle Rose (1, 2)

    Graphic Response
  • Karen Allen from the all time greatest college movie ever...."Animal House" (1978). Here is Karen's bare bum.

  • Sarah Holcomb, topless, also from "Animal House".

    Be sure to pay Graphic Response a visit at his website. www.graphic-barry.com.

  • Oz
    First, a few non-nude glamour scans.

  • Jade Jagger demonstrates that there are no doubts as to who her father is, particularly in the first scan. (1, 2)
  • Kate Beckinsale shows some nice cleavage.
  • Kylie Minogue models some of her line of lingerie.
  • A bald Bai Ling shows some very nice pokies in Anna and the King. It's the scene just before she is decapitated.

    On to the nudes....

  • Marsha Thomason...No nudity as she plays a fire stripper in Brazen Hussies. Unfortunately there are some tassels in the way.

  • Lauren Hutton...There is just the briefest of side views when Lauren Hutton steps out of the shower in "Pieces of Dreams".

    From "Man on the Moon"
    Man on the Moon is a comic vehicle for Jim Carrey and I actually enjoyed it. Angela Jones and Krystina Carson are two hookers he picks up and with whom he has a good time. I don't know who is who. I'd guess Krystina is the blonde.

  • Angela Jones and Krystina Carson (1, 2, 3)

    from "Splitting Heirs"
    Another movie that I enjoyed is Splitting Heirs. The only nudity comes from Catherine Zeta-Jones and only in one frame. She's doing the breaststroke nude and the nip just becomes visible under the water (see the second collage). The other collages are just for show.

    Barbara Hershey plays Eric Idle's mother and shows some cleavage. A bit of a credibility problem here as she is 10 years younger than him, and looks it. Louise Downey is a stripper but, unfortunately, again some tassels get in the road.

  • Catherine Zeta-Jones (1, 2, 3)
  • Barbara Hershey
  • Louise Downey

  • Christine Belford plays the love interest in "The Groundstar Conspiracy", an interesting thriller. No nudity, just some nice cleavage.

  • Brooke Shields...Naturally no nudity by Brooke in "The Bachelor", she just struts her stuff in her underwear. Another enjoyable movie, even if you know what's going to happen.

  • Ekaterina Rednikova...There are some very nice topless shots of Ekaterina Rednikova in the Russian movie "The Thief".

  • Felecia Deel...I think these caps from "Species II" have appeared before. She plays a stripper.

  • Kathryn Erbe...There is some long distance topless shots of Kathryn Erbe in "Dream with the Fishes".

  • Janie Squire...Just before she gets eaten by, and in, "Piranha", she has to take her top off. Unfortunately, it was a little dark

    From "Phat Beach"
    A few strippers in these caps from Phat Beach. There's the silicone-filled Devon De Ray and the very delectable Tamara Nicole Bennett. Glenise Braithwaite also has a shot at it but the topless caps are almost certainly a body double. There is also the briefest of flashes by Nicole Amarat during a coitus interruptus.

  • Devon De Ray
  • Tamara Nicole Bennett
  • Glenise Braithwaite
  • Nicole Amarat

  • Whyscan's Revenge, part 7
  • Jo O'Meara of the pop band S Club 7 caught topless (and making some not so flattering faces) by the British tabloids. (1, 2, 3)

  • Kelly Brook's car wash paparazzi pics with plenty of leg and cleavage from The Sun. (1, 2)

  • Victoria Hervey, 5 great scans from Maxim, plus #6 is a paparazzi upskirt. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
  • Blackshine
    More fantastic scans from Andreas H. Bitesnich's book "Woman". Beautiful women with perfect bodies and wonderful nudity!

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  • Cheryl (1, 2)

  • Phillipa...Link #1 is highly recommended! (1, 2, 3)

  • Alessia Marcuzzi (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
  • The Funnies by Number 6
  • The Top 15 Lines You will Never Hear in a Western

    15. "Gentlemen, rather than get caught up in mindless reaction, let's draw upon our feminine selves for a more intuitive solution."

    14. "Can we postpone this duel till 12:05? I gotta use the little boys' room."

    13. "Injuns! Quick, pull the wagons into an irregular dodecagon!"

    12. "Y'know, Badlands Pete... a roaring campfire, good coffee, nice prairie breeze, just you 'n' me... what say we put on the rhinestone gowns and dance a jig or two?"

    11. "Guns? We don't need no stinking guns!"

    10. "I'm tellin' ya, I ain't shot no varmints since them PETA fellers set me straight."

    9. "Let's see... hardtack and pemmican... that's three grams of fat, seven grams of protein, and two starches."

    8. "Who let the dogies out?"

    7. "You 'n' Slim round up them strays, and I'll tell Cookie to get started on the gazpacho and the fondue."

    6. "That's him! That's the yella-bellied varmint who shot my therapist!"

    5. "He was a strong man, a good Marshall, and I reckon he had a keen eye for interior decoration."

    4. "Hey, Buck, do these chaps make my butt look big?"

    3. "Dammit, Jake, yer an enabler!"

    2. "It's like I keep tellin' ya, Earl: men is from Tombstone, women is from Dodge."

    and the number 1 Line You'll Never Hear in a Western...

    1. "HANG HIM HIGH, BOYS!! ...Okay, now a little to the left... Oooh! Stop right there. Perfect!"


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