This week happens to be a fluke. It's in the height of the summer season, and the only two releases are turkeys. During the equivalent weekend last year, the new new movies were Wonka and Wedding Crashers, so the comparative numbers are expected to have a case of the super-suck. Last week was 48% above the same weekend last year. This week is expected to be DOWN 10%!!! That's following seven consecutive UP weeks.
This week's movies (2400 screens): Little Man - NO good reviews. It has been hidden from the big reviewers, which is always a certain concession that the reviews will be hideous. The tally so far:
... part of the Republican leadership's election-year "values" agenda — designed to choke off the flow of U.S. money to poker and other gambling sites, most of which are based overseas, because Internet gambling is illegal in the United States.
"Chev Chelios is about to begin his morning with an unexpected wake-up call. Groggy, practically unable to move and with a heart that's barely beating, he hears the voice of thug Ricky Verona, who reveals Chev has been poisoned in his sleep and only has an hour to live. As it turns out, Chev is a hit man who freelances for a major West Coast syndicate. A run of the mill job the night before instead went awry: he let his target slip away in an effort to quit professional killing and start a new life with his girlfriend Eve. Now, Chev must keep moving to stay alive: the only way to prolong the poison from stopping his heart is to keep his adrenaline flowing. As the clock ticks, Chelios cuts a swath through the streets of Los Angeles, wreaking havoc on those who dare stand in his way. He must rescue Eve from danger, stay two steps ahead of his nemeses and search for an antidote to save his own life."
Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format.
Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.
10 (1979) was reviewed to death when I first capped it several years ago. A discount DVD with 10 on one side and Tarzan the Ape Man on the other was just released, and features decent Widescreen versions of both films, but little in the way of extras. In looking at my old images, I felt I could do much better. As a reminder, Bo Derek, in her first film, becomes the object of desire for male menopausal Dudley Moore who spots her on the way to her wedding. He is bickering with his girlfriend, Julie Andrews, and tired of his neighbor, whom he watches through a telescope, and who is enjoying a steady stream of beautiful naked women (played by porn actresses). He follows Derek to her Mexican honeymoon.
Derek shows breasts and buns, Julie Andrews has a pokie, and the naked porn actresses include Dorothy LeMay, Serena, Constance Money, Annette Haven and more. I am including the original images slightly reworked, and new ones of the major stars.
IMDb currently has this one at 5.6, with very little variation by sex or age. I find that it has not aged well for me. I was acutely aware of Bo's inability to act this time through, and find that I am finally tired of Moore's lovable drunk character. I was also more irritated than before by the dark lighting in the Bo Derek sex scene. Dudley Moore was supposedly an Oscar Winning composer, and Mancini did the music for this, but didn't manage even one notable tune this time, although he did receive an Oscar nomination. Something the caliber of Days of Wine and Roses or Moon River would have helped. It is, however, a must see for Bo Derek fans, and has become a part of our culture, and introduced new generations to Ravel's Bolero. I am downgrading my B- to a low C+.
Annette Haven (widescreen)
Bo Derek (widescreen)
Constance Money (widescreen)
Dee Walace Stone
Annette Haven, Serena and Candida Royale
Julie Andrews (widescreen)
Dorothy LeMay and Serena (widescreen)
Back to Horrorland with "The Halfway House". This one has to be right up my alley as it has topless "Babes in Bondage".
Ashley Rhea abducted off the street and tied down ready to be eaten by the one eyed green purple people eater.
Monica Shere likewise ready for the monsters next meal.
Coming to DVD July 25th! Salma Hayek nekkid in "Ask the Dust! The scenes are dark but (and one is in the ocean), but we do have very clear breast views, plus partial rear and frontal nudity!
Here is Aussie babe Abbie Cornish topless in scenes from "Candy" (2006). Currently this movie is making the rounds in assorted film festivals. The IMDb has a limited release date for the US in November.
Annabeth Gish shows undies and some partial breast exposure in the debut episode of the heavily advertised new Showtime series "Brotherhood".
Cynthia Ettinger shows of "quite a bit of breast" for the second week in a row on "Deadwood".
B-movie babe Eva Derrek is looking pretty darn good in a couple of topless scenes from "The Graveyard" (2006).
María Botto is topless (and apparently using her breasts for tooth brush storage) in a scene from the Spanish comedy "Seres queridos" (aka "Only Human") (2004).
Also from "Seres queridos", Ramata Koite has a topless scene (sorry, no tooth brush this time)
Former WWE babe and co-star of one of my favorite shows, "Son of the Beach". Here is Amy Weber showing of breasts, bum and an over all very nice bod in scenes from "Forbidden Games" (1995).
Also from "Forbidden Games", here is former Page 3 babe turned actress and publisher, Gail Harris. Gail is kind enough to show off all 3 B's in these 'caps.
Pat's comments in yellow...
MOST POPULAR PICK-UP LINES
Followed By The Most Popular Shoot-Down Lines - The British publisher
Chambers Harrap has compiled the top 10 most popular pick-up lines from
around the world and put them into a book in six different languages for
traveling pick-up artists. They include, "Didn't it hurt when you fell
from Heaven?"..."You must be tired because you've been running through my
mind all day"..."The only thing your eyes haven't told me is your
name"...and the #1 line worldwide: "Was your father a thief? Because he
stole the stars from the skies and put them in your eyes."
* How can you see the stars in a woman's eyes when she's rolling them?
* It's a good thing throwing up is healthy for women.
* They said "most popular," not "most effective."
* Women usually reply, "YOU must've been running all day, because you are
SO LAME now."
* There's also a book for women that teaches them how to say, "Do you have
a barf bag?" in six languages.
MOVIES TO SHOW BARFING AND POOPING
Great, More Crap On Movie Screens - Martin Creed, former winner of the
Turner Prize for modern art, is finishing up "Sick Film," his film that
shows 19 different people vomiting on camera. His next cinematic art
project, "S**t (Excrement) Film," will show people defecating on camera.
He said it was harder to find people willing to do that on camera than to
throw up. But when they started advertising in Los Angeles, they quickly
got 15 people, perhaps because "L.A. represents the extreme edge of the
* No, it represents the land of actors who'll do ANYTHING to get into a
* More likely, it's because L.A. is full of actors for whom bulimia and
laxatives are no big deal.
* And you thought the sidewalks of Paris were filthy!
* The vomit movie was easier: he just showed rushes of the excrement movie
to film critics, then filmed them throwing up.
WORST WRITING CONTEST WINNER
Didn't Snoopy Write That? - Retiree Jim Guigli of Carmichael, California,
won this year's Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest for the worst opening
sentence of an imaginary novel. The contest is named after the author
whose 1830 novel "Paul Clifford" began, "It was a dark and stormy night."
Guigli's winning entry: "Detective Bart Lasiter was in his office studying
the light from his one small window falling on his super burrito when the
door swung open to reveal a woman whose body said you've had your last
burrito for a while, whose face said angels did exist, and whose eyes said
she could make you dig your own grave and lick the shovel clean." Guigli
said he once wanted to write crime novels, but "never got a good start on
* Until now!
* He never became a crime writer, but his writing is a crime.
* Jackie Collins would've won, but she was disqualified for being a
professional bad writer.