Tuesday

Film clips:

Holly Hunter in The Piano. This zip file encompasses two film clips.

Holly Hunter (zipped clip)

Joan Severance in See No Evil, Hear No Evil (Movie House Review)

Joan Severance (zipped clip)

Sharon Stone, way back in 1988, in Action Jackson (Movie House Review). This zip file encompasses two film clips.

Sharon Stone (zipped clip)

 

 

Other Crap:

 

Phone Scoop ... if you don't want to be ignorant about cell phones

When Soccer Ruled The USA

I'm not sure whether this film is rotoscoped or pure animation, but it's a pretty cool trailer.

Kevin Smith and Michael Bay, together at last

"Nine years after the launch of his last feature film, James Cameron is targeting a summer 2008 release for his next project"

Gamers: IGN Weekly looks at Madden 2007 (Also a look at A Scanner Darkly)

Somebody is getting laid tonight! Man Jumps On 10-Foot Alligator's Back To Save Girlfriend's Dog

Stacey Dash is gorgeous naked!

"Pamela Anderson lets it all hang out on a yacht somewhere in Europe."

Pirates of the Caribbean 2 - The Filthy Critic

  • This is one of the best movie reviews I have ever read. He hits upon every major point that needs to be made, and generally does so in a unique and amusing way.
  • "The movie so actively switches between special effects shit and the heavy exposition that it has no core or sense of urgency. Not only does it not build to an ending, it doesn't have an ending. Instead of emotional and conflict resolution, you get a teaser for Pirates 3."

MovieJuice! reviews: Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest

Stupendous Man Returns

Sarah Silverman on TV:

 

 

Movie Reviews:

Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe). White asterisk: expanded format. Blue asterisk: not mine. No asterisk: it probably sucks.

 

"East End Hustle"

East End Hustle (1976) is a Canadian exploitation roughie being released today by Troma. We owe Lloyd Kaufman a debt of gratitude for unearthing some of these buried films, but, in all honesty, some of them should have stayed buried, and his loving remastering process leaves a great deal to be desired. Such is the case here. This DVD clearly used a tape for source material, and is dark with soft focus, and the audio mix is simply awful. The characters have rather strong French Canadian accents, and the score is so loud it is nearly impossible to understand them.

Marianne (Anne-Marie Provencher) lives with an abusive father, but is the only defense for her brothers and sisters. Once she has them safely off to school, it is on to the sweat shop where she is a seamstress. At the end of the day, her boss calls her in for his ritual sex, and then informs her that she will be doing more work that night. The "work" is being sold to a local pimp. That is where we meet Cindy (Andrée Pelletier) who used to work for the pimp, but left when he beat up one of the girls as an example to the others. Her infraction was complaining when a John beat her.

Cindy steals Marianne, which doesn't exactly endear her to the pimp, or his underworld friends. She concocts a plan to get all of his women from him, and help them leave town. He brings in New York muscle, but makes one last attempt to win her back to his side. I must admit, it was a great plan, and I am at a loss as to why she didn't respond well to it, but he brutally raped her, fully expecting that she would fall back in line. Several women show body parts, at least one more gets rape, several people die, and, in the end, probably nothing has really changed.

Anne-Marie Provencher and Andrée Pelletier do full frontal, as does at least one other woman in a skinny dipping scene with three girls. My guess is the Provencher and Pelltier are two of the three. Julia Plummer and Michèle Mercure both show breasts, as do several unknowns.

IMDb readers say 2.1. I expect it will find its fan base with the new DVD release, and end up in the 5s somewhere. For my part, the quality was terrible, the story weak, and there wasn't really anyone to care much about. This is a low C-.


Andrée Pelletier



Anne-Marie Provencher



Julia Plummer



Michèle Mercure



Unknowns




 



Today the Time Machine is back in 1991 for "Dance With Death".

A reporter goes undercover at a strip bar to look for a killer. The reporter is played by one of my favorites, Barbara Alyn Woods and while she is undercover let's just say she gets uncovered. Enjoy Barbara working the pole.


Barbara Alyn Woods




'Caps and comments by Dann:

"The Sisterhood"
Corny and sometimes lame, 2004's The Sisterhood nevertheless is worth a look, if only because it's loaded with eye candy.

The BAT sorority has a strange influence over its members. Aside from a lot of bi-sexual fooling around, the president seems to hold unusual power over the other girls, and there seems to be an underworld influence as well.

Asked by a teacher (Barbara Crampton) to help figure out what's going on with the BAT's, Christine, a student with exceptional psychic powers, seems to fall under the spell as well.

Yeah, it's dumb, but it's fun to watch. Unfortunately, there's no real nudity, only a slight nip slip by Jennifer Holland, but the girls spend a ton of time in bras and panties. The film is rated R, but I suspect, based on the lack of nudity, that they were actually trying for PG-13, and missed because of all the lesbian fooling around.


Jennifer Holland and the Women of "The Sisterhood"



'Caps and comments by Oz:

"Urban Cowboy"
We celebrate Jerry Hall's 50 birthday and we see her with sister Cyndy topless but with the goodies hidden in Urban Cowboy (1980).

Jerry and Cyndy Hall (zipped avi)


"Cheech and Chong Still Smokin'"
Tuna recently capped Linnea Quigley in Still Smokin' (1982). This is the whole sequence where we see Linnea and some other unidentified topless women.

Linnea Quigley (zipped avi)


"Wild at Heart"
'Caps of the topless women in Wild at Heart (1990) have appeared a few times in the FH. The women are Laura Dern, Charlie Spradling, Leigh Valli, Mia Ruiz, Lisa Ann Cabasa and some who should have kept their clothes on. I've done my own set of 'caps and have included the relevant movies. (Sorry about the sound quality for the Leigh Valli - Mia Ruiz movie but you don't really care about what they're saying.)

Laura Dern
Laura Dern (zipped avi)


Charlie Spradling Leigh Valli and Mia Ruiz Lisa Ann Cabasa Unknowns
CharlieSpradling (zipped avi) Leigh Valli, Mia Ruiz (zipped avi) Lisa Ann Cabasa (zipped avi) Unknowns (zipped avi)





From the Skin-man, here is former 80's singer/model/B-babe Vanity baring all in scenes from one of her earliest movies, "Tanya's Island" (1980).


Pat's comments in yellow...

ANTI-WAR CELEBRITIES ON "ROLLING HUNGER STRIKE"
Michael Moore, 30 Minutes - About 2,700 anti-war activists, including such celebrities as Sean Penn, Susan Sarandon, Danny Glover, Willie Nelson and Michael Moore, are joining in a "rolling fast" to demand the immediate return of troops from Iraq. Each participant will go without food for one day before passing the "rolling fast" on to the next person.

* Don't most Hollywood actresses usually only eat about once every three days?...If Keira Knightley goes on this hunger strike, she'll GAIN weight!
* Rumsfeld is already on the phone to the Pentagon, barking, "Call the troops home right now! Sean Penn skipped lunch!"
* Willie Nelson will last about 20 minutes before the munchies overcome him.
* Some say it's pointless, but if Michael Moore fasts for just one day, it will save enough food to feed Ethiopia for a year.


PARENTS LIE ABOUT THEIR YOUTH TO SEEM COOL
Only 3 Percent Slept With Mick Jagger - A survey of British parents by UKTV History found that many lie to their kids about what they did in the 1960s in an attempt to appear cool. While most had typically boring youths, 9 percent told their kids they'd seen the Beatles live, 11 percent said they knew some '60s icon like Twiggy or Mick Jagger, and many claimed they'd indulged in hippie love-ins, while only 6 percent were actually hippies. 25 percent boasted that they'd been "too stoned to remember the '60s," while in fact, only 8 percent had tried pot and fewer than 1 percent ever took LSD. Oddly enough, parents who came of age in the '70s and '80s lied in the opposite direction: they were too embarrassed about their music, fads and fashions to admit to their kids that they'd participated in them.

* You mean kids aren't impressed that I not only saw A Flock of Seagulls, but I actually had the haircut?!
* Tell them you only wore those '70s fashions because you were still high from the drugs you took in the '60s.
* The important lesson Baby Boomers want to convey to their kids is that taking drugs is cool, but only if you're doing it while having group sex at a Beatles concert.
* So be honest with your kids about the facts of life and admit that dad really wasn't the bass player for the Fugs.


BIRD POOP IS INDESTRUCTIBLE
That's How I Protect My Car - Three weeks ago, space shuttle Discovery astronaut Tony Ceccacci noticed some white spots on the shuttle that NASA said were bird droppings. After sitting through Florida storms, the shuttle was blasted with 300,000 gallons of water as it was launched and went into orbit at 17,500 mph. And cameras show most of the bird droppings are still stuck to it in space. Scientists assume they'll burn off when it reenters the atmosphere and heats to 3,000 degrees F.

* Unless, of course, it's pigeon poop...
* If they want to keep the astronauts safe, maybe they should coat the entire shuttle in bird poop.