Dying God



Filmed in Buenos Aires for about half a million dollars, combining international actors with local performers and some people who seem not to have acted before at all, Dying God is essentially a creature movie about sort of an Amazon version of Sasquatch, called the Kurupi, who is loose and on a murder spree in Buenos Aires one summer. His prey consists of the city's hookers.

And no, it's not pronounced "Crappy." It's COOR-oo-pee.

I suggest you call him Mr. Kurupi.

The monster is the last of his race, and he is accompanied by an Indian shaman, who is the very last member of the tribe that once worshipped the Kurupis as gods. The shaman has no reason to be in the story other than to get captured and provide plot exposition before he dies. After all, how else could anyone know the back story of inarticulate monsters worshipped by a Stone Age tribe unless there is one chatty tribesman left? It seems that the monster is dying and knows it. Before he passes on he must mate with a human woman to insure the survival of his species. Unfortunately, that mating process is a rather unfortunate one for the humans involved, since Kurupi's giant penis and its vast quantity of ejaculate will kill any infertile woman, automatically exploding her womb from the inside. (The police seem surprised by this, but I thought every guy had this problem. I guess it's just me and Kurupi.) I'm not sure why the same process does not kill fertile women but, well, it just doesn't. It just hurts a real lot. On the other hand, it hurts a lot less than the eventual delivery process used by Mr. Kurupi on women who bring the baby to term. Since there are no more of his race, he's the designated obstetrician and has to employ some kind of a makeshift bare-handed Caesarian technique. Imagine Mola Ram delivering a baby, and you'll have the general idea.

The most prominent stars of the film are two Americans. James Horan plays the cynical corrupt cop who is trying to solve the murder cases, and wheelchair-bound Lance Henriksen plays the kingpin of the Buenos Aires prostitution scene. Other international performers include former American porn star Misty Mundae (now known as Erin Brown), and the French actress Agathe de la Boulaye, who plays Henriksen's mute stepdaughter and bodyguard.

I don't normally notice the quality of the acting in a film unless it is either brilliant or very bad. I noticed it in this case for the latter reason. The performances from the locals, who take all the minor roles, are so bad as to tear down the fourth wall entirely and constantly remind one that it's just a movie - a bad, low budget B movie. Here is a sample.

Of course, the acting is a pretty good match for the script, the concept, and the special effects. Check out this battle between Henriksen's bodyguard and Mr. Kurupi:

The scene looks comical as is, but is absolutely hilarious when you see it in context, because the Kurupi has survived a hail of bullets which would have felled The Incredible Hulk and has just ripped off a man's head with his bare hands, when Agathe de la Boulaye decides that she's not going to run, but is going to go mano-a-mano with the giant-schlonged monster. Needless to say, she ends up in his secret mating lair where she is to be groomed for future Kurupi stepmotherhood.

And so it goes until the final showdown in which every main character is killed ... but ... stumbling from the Kurupi's semi-secret lair is a pregnant human woman ...

The End???

The author Graham Greene once noted that he found baseless optimism more poignant and appalling than despair. Since the writer/director's ending for this film anticipates that people will be clamoring for a sequel, Greene must be wincing in the afterlife.

There is quite a bit of nudity, and not just from the Kurupi, although the monster provided the only lower-body action. The women provided breasts only.




  • * Yellow asterisk: funny (maybe).

  • * White asterisk: expanded format.

  • * Blue asterisk: not mine.

  • No asterisk: it probably sucks.


Catch the deluxe version of Other Crap in real time, with all the bells and whistles, here.








Before the Devil Knows You're Dead


Before the Devil Knows You're Dead is ostensibly the story of two brothers (Phillip Seymour Hoffman and Ethan Hawke) who attempt to rob their parents' jewelry story. Big brother, a real estate firm employment manager with a heroin habit, plans the robbery. Little brother, who is  porking his brother's wife (Marisa Tomei), is to commit the actual crime, but hires an outsider instead. The hired gun doesn't recognize the brothers' mother in the store and blows her away.

I probably should have called that a spoiler, but you learn all of that in the first ten minutes anyway. In case you are not bright enough to catch it the first time through, director Sydney Lumet gives you numerous chances at it. The actual story is told several times from different POVs, none of which contain any additional information. 

IMDb voters and critics loved it, and the film even generated a little Oscar buzz last year, but for me this has roughly the same appeal as a reality show about an ant farm. Sydney Lumet has made many hit films that I like very much, and some less popular films that I also found watchable. This one is, for me, not in either category.

Marisa Tomei takes her clothes off. Ok, so much for what is good about the film.










Today two famous ladies bare the boobs. Linda Kozlowski dishes out a little "Backstreet Justice" and some boobage in the process in 1994.


Then Kate Hudson with just a quick peek at the "Niblets" in 2000, in Almost Famous






Notes and collages



Melanie Griffith







Fairy Tales


This and upcoming columns: some clips from Fairy Tales

This adult version of the Brothers Grimm stories is a hoot. You got your Idy Tripoldi to start off things and your Linnea Quigley to finish 'em up. Between those two, Angela Aames and former Pet Mariwin Roberts and a bunch of others give up the goodies. There is even a reverse Hankster scene in which guys are chained to the wall and nekkid gals are offering to whip they sing Beat Me Daddy Eight to the Bar. One of the singing whipsters - the brunette - is Evelyn Guerrero.

Clip #7: Evelyn Guerrero (sample below)











Here are the film clips of Kristin Cavallari

Here are the film clips of Ashley Wyatt


The collages are below:











Innocents With Dirty Hands


Romy Schneider film clip.

Captures below from this Claude Chabrol film.







Stump the Band


B-movie doesn't mean bad movie, certainly not in the case of this 2006 horror flick. It's well done, lots of fun, the acting is decent, the villain and his "dog" are really cool, and it's all-around just a good horror film. Oh, and the band is pretty hot.

A female punk rock band on tour gets lost in the woods of Wisconsin, and their van breaks down. Yeah, ok, so that's pretty standard horror fare, but it gets better. Unfortunately for the band, there is a local fellow with a foot fetish. He collects 'em. Only problem is, he only wants the foot, and over the years, he's accumulated quite a nice collection because lots of people get lost in the woods.

Trust me, it's much better than it sounds, gory, but also filled with a lot of comedy, nice nudity, and some cool twists. Definitely a must-see for horror fans.

Becky Boxer






Film Clips

Two women from Murphy's Law, a 1986 Charles Bronson revenge flick: Angel Tompkins and Lisa Lorient

Two women from Vers le sud (2006): Charlotte Rampling and Karen Young

Lynn Whitfield is incredibly beautiful in The Josephine Baker Story. (1991)

Aoi Sola in Man Woman and the Wall (2007)

Mia Farrow in Hurricane (sample right)