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All
comments by Johnny
Moronic:
Haven't gone to the
VHS vault for a while,
so here's two
Melbourne comedy
movies made by the
same people and both
released in 1984.
As usual with VHS
updates, the quality
isn't as the greatest,
but both movies have
come out quite well. I
was reading up on
Future Schlock and it
looks like the
original copies have
all been lost and
recorded over, so this
may be the best it
will ever be. As the
filmmakers also made
Channel Chaos, I
wouldn't be surprised
if it was the same for
that movie.
Future
Schlock
1984
Future
Schlock is a
1984 comedy set
after the 1990
middle class
uprising.
Melbourne has a
wall around the
inner city where
all the
layabouts live
in a ghetto
while the middle
class
suburbanite or
the 'subbies'
live in perfect
normality on the
other side. Two
people run amok
through the
suburbs in their
Corvette,
annoying all the
subbies and cops
while been
lauded in the
ghetto and they
are Sarah
(Mary-Anne
Fahey) and Bear
(Michael Bishop)
aka Pancho and
The Cisco Kid.
They have a
nightly show at
Alvin's (Tiriel
Mora) Hole where
they sing up a
storm and harass
any subbies that
dare to enter.
After going to
far, the subbies
set their best
two cops onto
them Captain
Fruitcake (Peter
Cox) and
Sergeant Tatts
(Keith Walker).
Meanwhile,
during a subbies
party where they
were wreaking
havoc, Sarah and
Bear meet Ronnie
(Tracey
Callander), who
is enjoying
their antics and
they decide to
let her hang
around, sharing
everything they
have and even
joining in on
their act. By
now, Fruitcake
and Tatts are
closing in on
Sarah and Bear,
but that is
exactly what
they want.
Bizarre
comedy, barely
70 minutes in
length, that is
very rough
around the edges
(mainly due to
its low budget)
and the comedy
is very dicey
and not as funny
as it thinks it
is. Some
characters are
overdubbed for
extra comedy
wackiness, but
it's terrible
and doesn't fit
the movie at
all. Full of old
Melbourne comedy
types from that
period which at
least gives it a
nostalgic view,
but most don't
have much to do.
I will say that
it's a bit of
shock to see
Mary-Anne Fahey
(The Comedy
Company) and
Tracey Callander
(Acropolis Now)
naked in this
movie (although
I was tipped off
to this a while
back). Wow, a
definite nice
surprise, too
bad the movie is
an unfunny
curio.
Mary
Anne Fahey and
Tracey Callander film
clip (collages below)
 
Channel
Chaos
1984
Channel
Chaos is a 1984
comedy set in a
television
channel run by
George (Clive
Hearne) which is
dying in the
ratings, so new
ideas are
needed. These
include a
salacious game
show called
Showgirls Quiz
featuring the
JIggler (yep!)
and Nudists with
Leukemia (double
yep...). This
catches the ire
of the censor
Sir Ninian
Richards (Peter
Thompson) (Sir
Ninian, the most
80s Australian
gag ever) who
has one hit, a
terrible cop
show starring
Mike (Jay
Hackett) and
Kookie (Tim
Scally),
produced by
Helen (Lyn
Semmler) and
written by Tim
aka Ratface
(Alan Pentland).
Tim has plans to
get a gig on 60
Minutes and has
a file with
damning evidence
of something
that is sure to
make that
happen. But he
is found stabbed
to death later
in the day. Mike
and Kookie have
a crazy idea
that might work
and that's find
out who murdered
Tim as their
characters and
they film it.
And they have
narrowed down
the suspects to
the
cross-dressing
security guard,
the stuttering
newsreader or it
could be someone
else completely.
Very
politically incorrect
comedy, but sadly not
in any good way
whatsoever because
quite simply, Channel
Chaos is desperately
appalling. Gags so
obvious you almost see
yourself in the writer
credits and when
they're not obvious,
they're simply groan
inducing as if 'This
is the best you can
do?' It even ends with
the entire cast and
everyone else running
after the killer in a
way that even Benny
Hill would've pinched
and made his own. So
many bad gags,
absolutely nothing to
recommend it, not even
a pointless Gavin Wood
cameo. So so so bad...
Diane
Fox
film clip (sample
below)
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