Making Believe (2001?) is the third episode of Intimate Strangers on the Little Acts of Naughtiness DVD. This opens with Stella Porter having sex. This scene didn't seem to have anything to do with the plot. Tane McClure is seeing someone but not really clicking with him, especially in bed. She is complaining to Kim Yates about it, and a customer within earshot suggests she try a male gigolo, namely him, who has a business called Making Believe. She goes for it, and it is everything she hoped. The episode ends with Kim asking for his phone number.
Porter and McClure show everything, as is the norm for this series. There is no information available at IMDb. This, again, is a C+. Not only does it have naked women and simulated sex in decent light and an excuse for a story, but it is short enough that it doesn't become tedious.
"One Night Affair"
One Night Affair (2001?) is the final of four episodes of Intimate Strangers on the Little Acts of Naughtiness DVD. In this one, Dana Robbins is to be married in two days. She and her intended have agreed that they can each have a final fling the night before the wedding with no recriminations. She tells Tane McClure and Kim Yates about this, and they help her figure out a good fantasy to act out. First, Tane recounts a fantasy of a strange man staying after closing in the bar and seducing her, then Kim talks about watching her boyfriend with another woman (Fabiola). Finally, Dana decides her fantasy. She will wear a wig and visit the groom, pretending to be someone else, but have Kim watching from outside.
I didn't find the story especially interesting this time, but again, it delivered on nudity and simulated sex, with Robbins, McClure and Fabiola showing everything. This DVD is a real bargain, with no less than nine different women showing everything in couples type erotic stories, all in good light, and in four bites size independent stories. Again, C+. Skinemax couples erotica doesn't get much better than this.
|Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)
Dragon Storm (2004):
Two sentences tell you most of the story on this
1. It is about medieval dudes battling dragons from
2. It was directed by Flounder from Animal House.
Flounder is quite thin now and doesn't really look
like a geek any more. He looks pretty much like any other 50 year old guy.
But there is a key sign that he still is a geek. He hired Angel
Boris to be in this film, and couldn't get her to take her clothes
off. How lame is that? It probably reminded him of some of his dates
in high school.
The story begins in "Carpathia" in 1190, with the
meteors from space bearing the flying, fire-breathing creatures who
immediately open a can of whoop-ass on a local kingdom. This
"kingdom" actually consists of one run-down former church
forty people living inside it, so the five dragons didn't get much
of a match. The evil "king" and his entourage flee the attack
through a secret underground passage, after which they make their
way to the next "kingdom" - on foot.
This arduous journey takes them a few minutes.
They are welcomed by the neighboring "king", who is a much nicer guy
than the evil king, and who at least has a decent castle, and not
just a decrepit old church. I guess he blew all his treasury on the
castle, however, because his crown seems to consist of one of those
paper hats from Burger King, with "burger" crossed out in magic
Based on the size of the kingdoms in this film, it is
a safe guess that Europe had about 100,000 members of phoney-baloney
royalty in 1190.
Pretty much the same as today.
By the way, John
Rhys-Davies plays the evil king. He is a real actor who was Sallah in the Indiana Jones movies, and Gimli
in the Lord of the Rings flicks, and shouldn't be desperate enough
to be in this film.
The two kings organize a hunting party to go out and do battle with
the dragons. The dragonslaying team consists of an alchemist, a
huntsman, the evil king's #1 henchman, a
weapons inventor, and the tomboy daughter of the good king.
There is also a Chinese martial arts specialist who understands
gunpowder. There is some possibility that a Chinese man would
understand gunpowder in those days, because the Chinese have records
of its use dating back even a couple centuries before that time, but
I presume this Chinese man is a bit lost, wandering through the
Carpathian mountains in 1190 A.D., some sixty years before Marco
Polo was born.
While the dragonslayers hunt for their prey, the evil king is back
in the castle plotting to depose the good king with the help
of a corrupt bishop. The evil king's not-quite-as-evil henchman also plans to kill some other
members of the dragon-slaying team, although he's not the brightest
guy in the world, because he tries to kill off one of the party's
most valuable members before they ever kill
the friggin' dragons.
The medieval power struggle between the kings and bishops is
underwritten grade-z crap, but the battle between the hunting party
and the dragons is not bad as grade-b fodder goes. The characters on
the hunting party were fairly interesting, and I was shocked to see
that the actual dragons were not predictably laughable, but were in
fact quite scary and realistic.
It isn't a good movie at all, and I can't tell you that adults
will get a kick out of it, but it's better than it sounds, and it
might amuse your kids for a while if you need a break from them.
Angel Boris's lack of nudity means that it's PG-13, and essentially
safe for youngsters. I called it a generous C-, although you could
argue for a D and I wouldn't have much of a rebuttal case.
- Angel Boris getting almost naked. (1,
I guess you may be able to
see her nipple in the second one, if you want to get technical on
Six Figures (2004):
Six Figures is an "urban crime drama" about six figures who plan
to rob a strip club of six figures. If my division is right, that
means they would get one figure each.
"Urban drama" is now the official euphemism for "movie involving
people of dark-skinned African-American descent".
Thing go wrong for the urbanites. Much blood is spilled, and
most of them end up dead.
At least I think so. I lost interest halfway through, and just
snapped the nudity. There is quite a bit, but it consists of
professional Clothing Removal Engineers in the strip club.
The movie is virtually at "home movie" levels in many ways,
although it does lift itself above that level by affecting a bit of
Guy Richie cool with speeded-up motions, saturated stills with
written captions, etc. I didn't write a review, but I'd say D is
- Clothing removal professionals (1,
I don't have a clue which movie, or even
whether it is a movie:
- These pictures sure as hell look like a young Emmanuelle Beart.
Can anyone tell me where they come from, when they were taken, and
whether they are really Ms Beart. (1,
Liv Tyler to be a mom
A four minute trailer for the Star Wars original trilogy DVD.
Tarantino to do Kill Bill 3 in the year 2019. His fans
are probably already in line.
An hysterical BRITNEY SPEARS had to be calmed down by paramedics
after her car ran over a photographer. (Her mom was
Stripper dilemna: she's allergic to the pole!
Jeri Ryan's husband pressured her to have public sex in clubs,
while others watched. Unfortunately for us, Jeri was
wise to say "no". How long do you think pictures of those acts
would have stayed off the internet?
Urban Legends: Sorry, there is no skeleton of a giant man in Saudi
"Cheney needs to step aside for good of Bush, party".
Forget for a minute whether you approve of the President or not
and try to put yourself in the President's shoes. If you were the
Prez, would you eliminate Cheney BEFORE the election? Hell, no.
You run the risk of exposing some unknown to the rigorous scrutiny
of the election process. Every newspaper and every Democrat in the
country will be digging up everything the new guy has done since
he was toilet trained. The only way to avoid that would be to
choose McCain or Powell, choices which I presume the President
would avoid to assure spiritual continuity after his second term.
Cheney, on the other hand, is felt to be a known commodity and a
stable leader. Whatever dirt there is on him has already been dug
up. Furthermore, the President ran with hardliner Cheney when
Dubya himself was considered a moderate Republican like his dad.
Now that the President is considered an extreme Christian
conservative, he would (presumably) have to choose a respected
moderate, like McCain for example, to balance the ticket. That
means that the neo-con revolution would probably end with Dubya.
If I were Dubya, I would run with Cheney, with the understanding
that Cheney would resign "for health reasons" sometime after the
election. That would allow the President to by-pass the electoral
process, avoid the McCains of the world, and nominate his true
spiritual heir to the Vice-Presidency, subject only to a simple
majority approval in both houses of Congress.
- Note: I'm not saying I approve of that process, but it is
perfectly legal, good strategy, and is what I might do in the
- Exception: ignore the above if the President simply thinks
he will lose unless he chooses McCain or Powell. In that case,
he will simply have to do what he has to do to win. A
Bush/McCain ticket would be very strong, and would
conduct a fairly clean campaign, not just because McCain and
Kerry are friends, but because McCain is an ethical man and
would insist on it. In my opinion, choosing McCain as a running
mate would lift the President's stature both in reality and in
perception. But I don't think he would do it unless he thought
there was no other way to win.
Unfairenheit 9/11. Professional iconoclast Christopher Hitchens
weighs in on Michael Moore: "Fahrenheit 9/11 is a
sinister exercise in moral frivolity, crudely disguised as an
exercise in seriousness. It is also a spectacle of abject
political cowardice masking itself as a demonstration of
'dissenting' bravery." Rhetoric aside, it's quite a good article.
Hitchens is not a member of the Bush spin team, by any means, but
a free thinker who often takes a hearty dump on conservatives as
well. His last major article was
The Stupidity of Ronald Reagan, in which he said, "The
fox, as has been pointed out by more than one philosopher, knows
many small things, whereas the hedgehog knows one big thing.
Ronald Reagan was neither a fox nor a hedgehog. He was as dumb as
A Straight Dope Classic: Why did mystery writer Agatha Christie
mysteriously disappear in 1926?
- This site has
thousands of free pictures of Aria Giovanni!
Hotmail blocks gmail, bounces Gmail invitations
The trailer for The Grudge: "An English-language remake
of the Japanese horror thriller 'Ju-On'. 'The Grudge' is about a
murderous supernatural curse born of a grudge held by someone who
dies angry. The curse passes like a virus to its victims."
TomWilsonUSA.com - Tom Wilson's "Big Pop Fun". An
unapologetic tribute to kitschy stuff you had almost forgotten,
but still secretly love.
SADDAM, OSAMA "JUST GOOD FRIENDS""No Relationship",
aays bin Laden's Publicist
Did Britney's Mom Pull A Lizzie Grubman?
Thai officials organized a soccer game between elephants and
prisoners Sunday in hopes of discouraging gambling on the European
Championships. It has not yet been determined whether
Burt Reynolds will play a convict or an elephant in the movie
- From the department of "I didn't make this up":
What do you call pork fat soaked in chocolate? A "Ukrainian
Luba, wife of the legendary Hegre. (Oh, yeah, did I
mention she's nekkid?)
- Celebrity Poker News:
Ben Affleck wins a California State Hold 'em Tournament.
Yes, this was a highly competitive event, and yes, it is THAT Ben
Affleck. The lad can play.
Ralph Nader chooses a running mate. I know what you're
thinking. "Talk about minor news. Even in Norway they must have
buried this item amid the gardening tips." Actually, this is
important because Nader chose a prominent member of the Green
Party. Nader's timing was deliberate - the Green Party convention
starts the day after tomorrow, and he wants to be that Party's
nominee because they are already on the ballot in 22 states and
Lauren Jackson, WNBA MVP, poses nude in an Aussie magazine.
(With topless picture from the "making of" special)
Owen Wilson has signed on to co-star with Natalie Portman in the
comedy THE SMOKER. Wilson will star as a teacher at a
prestigious all-girls school who finds himself the subject of a
student's affection and eventually her proposal to marry.
- Whoa - they had to stop the presses in Norway! It's their
biggest front page headline story ever -
SAS pilots get cockpit alarm clocks. "SAS long-distance
flights between Scandinavia and the US now are flown by two pilots
instead of three. SAS has, however, provided the two remaining
pilots with an alarm clock in case one of them takes a nap."
- Today's news from Norway:
The Norwegian government cracks down on a private school that
lists Jesus Christ as executive manager . Hiring Mr
Christ was a risky move for the school, given the rather long gap
in his employment history, thirty years of unexplained whereabouts
after his birth, and a mysterious Egyptian stamp on his passport.
The move has paid off beautifully for the bottom line, however,
since Mr Christ refuses a salary, based on something about the
birds of the air and the lilies of the field.
Man obtains bush2004.com, creates a satire site, turns down offers
as high as $135,000 to sell the domain to Bush loyalists.
- An expert evaluates
the worst concepts in Porn.
"Michael Moore Hates America" - a Michael Moore-style film about
Additional captures from the Jenna Lewis sex video
- According to this article,
Connecticut Gov. John G. Rowland, the subject of investigations
into alleged corruption and facing possible impeachment, will
announce his resignation Monday night. This gives him
several more hours to remove anything not tied down.
My Life - The Memoirs of Bill Clinton - (The Movie Version).
Starring Ron Jeremy as Clinton. Ah, it's good to have Bubba to
kick around again. Those Dubya "I'm a 'tard" jokes were getting
old. Also on the page are links to three related stories:
- Lewinsky Ghost Writer Fellates Clinton Ghost Writer
- Each Copy of Clinton Book to Include Condom and Penicillin
- MoveOn.org Demands Free Republic Remove Thread Comparing
Clinton to Clinton
Bill Clinton My Life - Book Covers That Did Not Make The Cut
Steve Irwin uses Justin Timberlake to feed a giant croc.
And the Croc wanted Eminem for dessert! The article says that
Timberlake was completely at ease since he is used to dealing with
reptiles. And, of course, the reptile would not actually eat him,
based on professional courtesy.
Private Rocket Plane Successfully Punches Into Space
Trannies get toilet: "Snubbed by both men and women,
transvestite students at the Chiang Mai Technology School just
wanted a restroom to call their own -- and were granted their
Iranians sieze three British ships, arrest the eight crewmembers.
Eight men to man three "ships"? I think it is safe to assume they
were not aircraft carriers. Inspiration for next Bond film: In Her
Clinton gets 'visibly angry' in British TV interview.
The BBC took the position that his feud with Republicans was a
civil war among "far right-wingers". Kidding aside, it was a
Lewinsky thing, and Bubba vented some steam.
Playmate Gallery, Holly Joan Hart - April 1998, Courtesy of
Four free short videos from SPICE TV RAW!
Oh, we forgot to mention the good news: the Messiah is here. The
bad news: it's Reverend Moon. "Reverend Moon claims to
have had a pow-wow with ... religious figures in the heavens who
declared him the Messiah." Strangely, when I talked to those same
guys, they told me I was the Messiah. I wish the voices in
one's head would agree on a consistent message.
- GALLUP: Topically timed with the release of Clinton's memoirs,
a Gallup Poll review of the Clinton Presidency
Other Crap archives. May also include newer material than the ones above,
since it's sorta in real time.
to submit a URL for Other Crap
are the latest movie reviews available at scoopy.com.
- The yellow asterisks indicate that I wrote the
review, and am deluded into thinking it includes humor.
- If there is a white asterisk, it means that
there isn't any significant humor, but I inexplicably determined
there might be something else of interest.
- A blue asterisk indicates the review is written
by Tuna (or Junior or Brainscan, or somebody else besides me)
- If there is no asterisk, I wrote it, but am too
ashamed to admit it.
Words from Scoop.
.avi's from Shiloh.
.wmv files made by Scoop from Shiloh's .avi's.
NOTE: because of a unique combination of
circumstances with the Windows media player and some substantial
bandwidth theft, we will have to do all of our movie files in zip
format. Click on the files as you normally would to play them. When
you get a choice, click on "save", and put it on your hard drive in
the directory of your choice. UnZIP and play from there.
I know this is not especially convenient, but it
allows the film clips to continue. I can protect .zip files from
hot-linking in the same way I can protect still images. For some
reason, if I protect .avis and .wmvs from hot-linking, they will not
play in the Windows media player, and I can't get a satisfactory
work-around. Perhaps I will find a better solution, but for now this
new policy allows you to continue getting the movie clips you want
to see, which is much preferable to my abandoning the clips
Lesbotronic Film Clips, Part 1
What could be better than advanced lesbonics
between Emmanuelle Beart and Pascale Bussieres? The film is La
Repetition. Here they are in the tub. (.avi)
Emmanuelle Beart and Pascale Bussieres again. The
film is still La Repetition, but this time they are making out. (.avi)
Aimee and Jaguar is an artistic film about a
lesbian relationship in Nazi Germany. Here are four of the main
tootsies. We'll have much more from this film tomorrow. (.avi)
Perhaps these tips will help if you have trouble
with the codecs for these movies:
FYI when I hypercam vids to make the file size smaller I use
DivX MPEG-4 Fast-Motion for the video compressor, then I use
virtualdub to compress the audio. The properties for the
vids says the video codec: DivX Decoder Filter & audio
codec: Morgan Stream Switcher which I'm not familiar with.
When I compress the audio with virtualdub I use MPEG
Layer-3. A friend of mine told me about compressing the
audio about (6) mos. ago. Like I said previously, only been
capping for a year & a half & I'm no expert. Hopefully this
info will help members with the proper codecs for my vids.
When I cap big brother's I use hypercam mostly & sdp &
asfrecorder if the set up allows me. I stopped using
camtasia cause the file sizes were always too big, could
never figure out the process, over my head lol, plus it cost
too much to buy in my opinion.
A reader says:
You mentioned that some users were
having trouble with the videos on your site. There is a tool
designed to determine what codec is needed for a video.
http://www.headbands.com/gspot/ Hope this is useful to you
or your users.
I made the .wmv versions of each video. The codecs for these: Windows Video V8, Windows Audio 9.
The upside of these is that you know the codecs, and they'll play in
the Windows Media Player. The downside is that they are slightly
larger, and slightly lower quality.
'Caps and comments by Brainscan:
Mason Marconi was Pet of the Month for Oct. '97. Girl had one of the most
entertaining natural bodies in this quadrant of the galaxy, then she went and
got all pumped up in the hooter dept. Kept the killer rumpus, however. Been
in lots of things. Showgirls, a few Skinemax movies (sic) and maybe two dozen
strip-n-wiggle videos... even a couple of adult films (double sic), although
she has not done the nasty on-camera.
It is the devil keeping track of just how many times Ms. Marconi has stripped
for the moving camera, but it seems a good bet the disk I just capped,
entitled Private Dances Mason Marconi, is:
a) One of the first. Mason has her naturally dark hair and her all-natural
b) One of the most explicit. We be talkin' gynocam in the extreme here,
c) One of the worst photographed and transferred. Clearly a transfer from a
commercial videotape, which was shot by some asshole who you hear giving Mason
directions but who knows less about cameras and lighting than my border
collie, this DVD is a tragic waste. Not on a par, say, with the First World
War, but tragic and wasteful nonetheless.
So I grabbed a bunch of frames and put them together into something resembling
themes. Full frontal in 1 & 2, outrageously attractive bum (including
bend-over action to open the eyes of a dead man) in 3, 4 and 6, serious
spread-the-legs views in 5 and 7. Not half bad.
- Mason Marconi
WOW! The Ghost went all out covering the Skinemax flick "Fast Lane to Vegas" (2000)! 45 new video clips and 121 new collages of softcore babes and even a few famous porn stars!
Here is the fist installment.
As Scoop noted above, we currently have to do all of our movie files in zip format. Instead of viewing them online, save the zip files to your hard drive in the directory of your choice, un-zip and play from there.
Angela Penny...mostly just toplessness in the 'caps of her pseudo-sex scene. But we do see pubes in links #2 and #4. The .wmvs show breasts and a whole lot more pubes.
- Angela Penny 'caps
- Angela Penny individual zipped .wmvs
- All 3 Angela Penny .wmvs in one zip file
Flower Edwards aka "Flower". The former hardcore (if you count girl/girl action as hardcore) actress turned Skinemax regular. Mostly breast views in the 'caps, but link #1 features a view from the gyno-cam! The .wmvs have more skin, including all 3 B's and gyno-views in links #1 and #2.
- Flower Edwards
- Flower Edwards individual zipped .wmvs
- All 4 Flower Edwards .wms in one zip file
Sarah Kalla bares breasts, bum and plenty of up close and personal gyno-views in her one and only film credit.
'Caps links 2,3,4 and 11 are full of gyno views.
- Sarah Kalla
- Sarah Kalla individual zipped .wmvs
- All 7 Sarah Kalla .wms in one zip file
|The star of the 80's favorite "Weird Science" showing all 3 B's in scenes from the 1984 comedy, "The Woman in Red".
|The romantic comedy sweetheart switches gears and goes topless, bares her bum and even shows frontal nudity (in a very dark scene) in the 2003 movie "In the Cut".
|Rear nudity and see-thru nipple views in scenes from the made for TV movie "Helen of Troy" (2003).
||An excellent collage of 'caps by ZonononZor featuring toplessness in a scene from the low-budget John Cusack movie, "Money for Nothing" (1993).
|Cleavage and some open robe breast views in scenes from the made for Showtime movie "Noriega: God's Favorite" (2000).
||Comments and scan by Arthur Figgis:
Elettra Wiedemann is the daughter of Isabella Rosselini. She is kicking off a career as a model and if you ask me, I think she has the looks for it.
|Señor Skin 'caps of the B-movie and sometimes bit-part-in-A-movie actress topless in scenes from "Stealing Candy" (2002).
|Pat Reeder www.comedy-wire.com
Pat's comments in yellow...
BANK SUGGESTS CLIENTS FORGET MONEY, HAVE MORE SEX
Or Pay Someone To Have Sex With You - The major German-owned investment
bank Dresdner Kleinwort Wasserstein sent a note to customers reminding them
that there are more important things than money. Written by investment
strategist James Montier, the note advises clients to have sex, ideally
with someone they love; reflect on the good things in life; get enough
sleep; exercise regularly; and stop equating happiness with money.
In other words, do NOT live the life of an investment banker.
Translation: "We've lost all your money in the commodities market."
They should let a hooker run that bank...She'd tell you, "Sex is
overrated; get as much money as you can."
SEX NOT A MEDICAL TREATMENT
He Enjoyed Being Stripped - Dr. Randall J. Smith of the Adventist Health
Medical Group clinic in Gresham, Oregon, was sentenced to 60 days in jail
and stripped of his license for having sex with a patient. She said he
told her that massaging her "trigger points" would relieve her pelvic pain.
He then charged the Oregon state Health Plan $5,000 for the 45-minute
"treatment sessions." Smith was also ordered to perform 200 hours of
Providing "medical treatment" to wayward teenage girls.
$5000 sounds high, but he is an expert on the female pelvic region.
They were typical 45-minute doctor visits: 40 minutes of sitting naked
on a cold table, then five minutes of probing by the doctor.
He found a way to screw his patients and the taxpayers at
the same time.
MADONNA MERCHANDISE PRICED HIGH
Madonna's new tour trumpets her spirituality and disinterest in
materialism, but the New York Post reports that it doesn't apply at the
souvenir stands. The cheapest T-shirt is $40, with a navy blue tank shirt
for $65, a black "Re-Invention Tour" tank top $85, and a rhinestoned
T-shirt for $119.95. Questioned about the outrageous prices, Madonna's
spokeswoman insisted her shirts were higher quality, "more creative and
interesting" than other artists' shirts, that some are double-layered,
they're printed with a "special-technique," and some can even be worn
To show off their price tags.
...For when Madonna is OVER!
But girls who like Madonna wear their underwear over their T-shirts.
When you wear a T-shirt protesting materialism, you want it to be made
of only the finest materials.
The real reason for those high prices? Botox is also very expensive.
KRAVITZ PRAISES COURTNEY LOVE
She's His Heroine - Finally, some nice words for Courtney Love: Lenny
Kravitz said she's a "sweetheart" with "a very intelligent, beautiful
person inside" of her. Also, she runs through the lobby of their apartment
building naked, which he said "adds a little excitement to the building."
Or at least it did the first 400 times.
He just wishes she'd slow down enough for him to read all the tattoos.
There's an intelligent, beautiful person inside of her, but
unfortunately, the outside is a really skanky naked chick.
OSBOURNE TOPS "ROCK POWER" LIST
Ozzy Now Worships Sharon - Sharon Osbourne, who masterminded the TV show
that made the Osbournes $160 million, was named #1 on "Kerrang!" magazine's
list of the most important people in rock. She beat out #3 Brian Becker,
the boss of Clear Channel, and #2, Satan, "because the devil has all the
Sharon beat out Satan because she knows more obscene words than he does.