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"Body Parts" (1999)

Body Parts (1999) my have more names than people who have seen it. It is also known as Harrold Robbins' Body Parts (it is based on a Harold Robins novel) and IMDB calls it Vital Parts. As it is a direct to video, I have no idea where IMDB came up with the name. It stars Richard Grieco, who is convinced by his Navy buddy to ride along on a major drug purchase in Hong Kong for some easy money. Richard's wife, Athena Massey, drives the car. During the drug purchase, you know someone is going to double-cross someone, mostly from the music, but I was surprised when the buddy, Chris Aguilar, shoots both of the sellers and Grieco. Grieco survives the point blank shotgun blast to the stomach, and is framed by Aguilar and Massey for a double murder. He serves 5 years in a Hong Kong prison, and then is released.

Cut to Santa Monica. Grieco gets off of a sailboat, and is met by none other than Massey, who tells him that Aguilar has become a bigshot in the Philippine mob, and is out to kill him. The two are off to the Philippines to get him first, and to start the actual film. Massey convinces him she really loves him, and they have a sex scene, mostly really dark, but with a good view of her breasts afterwards. As Grieco starts the search for Aguilar, he starts in a strip club/whore house, and meets a hooker played by Joyce Jimenez, who befriends him. She is lovely, and shows us her full breasts numerous times.

I don't want to spoil any of the plot twists, of which there are plenty. There is almost no information available on this film. It is either an OK thriller with good exposure, or a very good softcore that is a little light on nudity and simulated sex. I guess that would make it a C+, as it works in at least 2 genres. Jiminez debuted in this film, and has a credit from 2000 at IMDB as well. She looks great, has no accent, and can act. I think we will see more of her.

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  • Athena Massey (1, 2)
  • Joyce Jimenez (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
  • Strippers (1, 2, 3)

    "Chain Gang Women" (1971)

    Chain Gang Women (1971) is classic exploitation fare, in that it has no chain gang women at all. As a matter of fact, there are no women in the first half of the film. When I ordered it, I envisioned shower scenes, cat fights, lesbian encounters, and a male trustee getting lucky. Our heroes escape from a chain gang. First, they head to the house of one of their girlfriends, Linda York. Both have sex with her, and then they take off and invade a farmhouse, where they both have sex with Barbara Mills. Both women show 3Bs.

    They use a strange 4 window screen during two chase scenes, where the content of the four is sometimes the same, and sometimes different views of the action. This is average exploitation fair, and two pretty young naked women. C.

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  • Barbara Mills (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)
  • Linda York (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)

  • Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy)

    California Heat is the movie with Angelica Bridges topless. Not really much of a movie, but I think I wrote kind of a funny review.

    These two new DVD releases have no nudity

    State and Main. Literate, intelligent comedy which taps into about the same educated target market as Woody Allen's films. David Mamet wrote and directed this surprisingly warm and uplifting story about a Hollywood film crew in a small Vermont town. Although the film is cynical about human nature, it also preaches the value of forgiveness and second chances.

    Save the Last Dance is a slick and competent movie, but it's not for you or me. Rent it for your 14 year old daughter, like I did. She'll think you're thoughtful.

    Jo Ann Harris

    Margaret Blye

    Scenes from "The Sporting Club" (1971)....
  • Jo Ann Harris: breasts through shear shirt, then buns in panties and finally topless.
  • Margaret Blye: very distant nude scene

  • Sammi Davis In "The Perfect Bride (1991). Here is a very dark and distant side view of her left breast during love scene.

    Robin Riker Robin showing some cleavage and then a partial breast while making whoopee in swimming pool at night. A bit of a stretch nudity wise but probably her sexiest scene in her 21 year acting career. Scenes from "Malcolm in the Middle", episode "New Neighbors".


    Sadie Leblanc?

    From the movie "Jailbait" (2000)....
  • Various unknown skinny-dippers showing breasts and bare bums.
  • Sadie Leblanc: the previously unidentified actress making out topless in the car is Sadie Leblanc. She also starred in the movie Gossip the same year. Her character is Erica and she is only identified by the close captioning as she walks up the stairs. The only problem is she does not look like the Sadie Leblanc identified as the hippie girl dancing topless on in the movie "Rated X". From seeing this scene over again Sadie may be the hippie girl sitting on the picnic table next to the one dancing topless (who is probably uncredited).

  • Kathy Bain

    Judy Foster

    Wendy Lands

    Chantale Perron

    Helene Udy

    Lenore Zann

    Unknown redhead

    "One Night Only" (1986) is another mid 1980s Canadian sex comedy featuring a lot of skin by several actresses before they got famous (i.e., Porky's and "Perfect Timing")

  • Kathy Bain: topless
  • Judy Foster: topless after releasing the hounds
  • Wendy Lands: topless
  • Chantale Perron: full frontal, all three B's during striptease including some up close and personal views
  • Helene Udy: buns and breasts
  • Lenore Zann: partial buns and alot of breasts during love scene
  • Unknown redhead: breasts and buns in thong

  • Kelly Gallant In wet see-through underwear in the action movie "Talons of the Eagle" (1992).

    Alexandra Paul

    Claudia Udy

    Lenore Zann

    Lora Staley

    "American Nightmare" (1983) is about the investigation of a string of murders of hookers and strippers. Much nudity by all of the female cast.

  • Alexandra Paul: topless in bed
  • Lora Staley: topless striptease, buns, topless love scene, and topless again.
  • Claudia Udy: topless striptease, buns and breasts in bath
  • Lenore Zann: topless and buns in striptease

  • Variety
    Kim Yates
    (1, 2, 3, 4)

    Plenty of toplessness from the Skinemax regular in these 'caps from "Secret Pleasures". Great work by Donbun.

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    Daryl Hannah
    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8,
    9, 10, 11)

    Daryl looking absolutely gorgeous in these great topless 'caps from "Reckless" (1984). Excellent work by Aesthete, especially considering that this movie is not available on DVD!

    Susan Ward Topless scene from "The In Crowd", by Snowblind.

    Viewer Request
    Hey's a bit of a challenge for ya from a Fun House reader....

    The movie: "A Clean Kill" aka "Her Married Lover"

    The actress: Roxana Zal

    The Scoop: At about the 34 minute mark there is a nice single breast and "hot nipple view".

    The downside (because there are two sides to every schwartz): We don't know if it is available on any home medium.

    The Funnies by Number 6
  • Secrets of Women's Language

    The Secrets of Women's Language : Keywords and their meaning. (In the interest of helping the guys keep peace in their households.)

  • Fine:
    This is the word women use at the end of any argument that they feel they are right about but need to shut you up. NEVER use fine to describe how woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those arguments.

  • Five minutes:
    This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before we take out the trash, so they feel that it's an even trade.

  • Nothing:
    This means something and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine."

  • Go Ahead (with raised eyebrows):
    This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine."

  • Go Ahead (normal eyebrows):
    This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care." You will get a raised eyebrow "Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.

  • Loud Sigh:
    This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal statement very misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing."

  • Soft Sigh:
    Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" are one of the few things that some men actually understand. She is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe and she will stay content.

  • Oh:
    This word followed by any statement is trouble. Example; "Oh, let me get that". Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night." If she says "Oh" before a statement, run, do not walk, to the nearest exit. She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least 2 days. "Oh" as the lead to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get raised eyebrows "Go ahead" followed by acts so unspeakable that I can't bring myself to write about them.

  • That's Okay:
    This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can say to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you retributions for what ever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and used in conjunction with a raised eyebrow "Go Ahead." At some point in the near future when she has plotted and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.

  • Please Do:
    This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance to tell the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay."

  • Thanks:
    A woman is thanking you. Do not faint, just say you're welcome.

  • Thanks A Lot:
    This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say, "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have hurt her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh." Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only tell you "Nothing."

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